Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

What to wear? What not to wear? Come here to find and how to make anything you'd wear on your body - from goggles and playawear to bodypainting and adornments.
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DerbyDave 18
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Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by DerbyDave 18 » Mon Mar 27, 2017 8:10 pm

I do make a lot of my own clothes but I and others who aren't one of the zero body fat group would love to find places either online or retail stores that carry clothes for people other than the one type of burner they all seem to cater to. I've found the Thai Fisherman pants and baggy things like that but would like to find more fun or unique types of clothes. I know that I will get responses that say no matter what size you are you should wear whatever you want but it would be nice to have more choices of types of clothes to choose from. Not everyone looks good in skin tight lycra or tiny shorts that barely cover your fun parts but still want a bit more interest or sex appeal than caftans and yoga pants.

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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by BBadger » Mon Mar 27, 2017 11:04 pm

You could, you know, make your own costumes and clothing and form your own style, rather than rely on whatever is "supposed" to be burner attire.

Those stores you're looking at are meant to attract people who really aren't that invested in making stuff but just want to look the part. You'll get a lot more compliments and respect for creating your own stuff.
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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by gaminwench » Tue Mar 28, 2017 2:43 am

I'm a huge fan of vests and sarongs for the guys.

Thrift store, all the way.
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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by FlyingMonkey » Tue Mar 28, 2017 4:11 am

BBadger wrote:You could, you know, make your own costumes and clothing and form your own style, rather than rely on whatever is "supposed" to be burner attire.

Those stores you're looking at are meant to attract people who really aren't that invested in making stuff but just want to look the part. You'll get a lot more compliments and respect for creating your own stuff.
Especially if you accentuate what makes you who you are. A person with a normal body in something original that expresses their individuality is a lot more interesting than sparkle bunnies in bikini's.

Ok, that's not 100% true, but after a day or two of half naked "pretty people" they all blend together & really don't stand out much. Uniqueness gets high marks on the Playa fashion runway..
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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by VultureChow » Tue Mar 28, 2017 8:10 am

Yes you can make your own, but sewing is a skill, and not one everyone can learn, do, havetime for etc.

My suggestions are:

Etsy: If you can find someone making something you like, chances are they can make something custom if you give them your measurements.

QVC and HSN: I know, I know crazy right? But it turns out that midwestern housewife and burner has more overlap than you'd think, especially when it comes to faux fur, and they come in very large sizes.

Ebay: Did you find the perfect faux fur coat on QVC but it's not in your size? Bam! Ebay.

Finally, my favorite suggestion and method is to take an item of clothing that fits and is comfortable and "burnerize" it. I might not be able to sew a coat from scratch, but I can definitely sew on lights, fur trim, epaulets, etc. Take cargo pants and scraps of metallic fabric and cover the pants in rough patches.

Granted, my experience is in shopping for women's clothes, but to be fair, my faux fur coats always look better on my husband. He looks like a rock star in a snake print faux fur full length coat. I look more, "Grey Gardens"
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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by SteveInRealLife » Tue Mar 28, 2017 8:38 am

FUCK THE DRESS CODE.

I'm not chiseled out of stone by any means, but I don't look bad in my underwear and I plan on wearing three piece thrift store suits all week and carrying a brief case. Wear what you feel like wearing and don't let anyone give you any shit about it or pressure of any kind to look a certain way. If you want to wear docksiders and cargo shorts, you sport that shit and feel good about it.

Go to the tanning salon for a few weeks, get nice an dark, and call it good. It's amazing what a legit tan can do for making you feel more confident about being naked. Something about not looking like a highlighter at a rave.

If you want to do some cool Burning Man-ish outfits, look no further than old Nintendo games.

http://soundnh.com/wp-content/uploads/2 ... 00x454.jpg Granted, Karnov is pretty ripped, but his outfit game is on point. You get yourself a cummerbund, some baggy pants, and crazy Russian elf shoes and you got yourself a stew that pleases company.

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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by Chowski » Tue Mar 28, 2017 8:53 am

Thrift store, ladies department. Go through the racks piece by piece, pull out things that have a great print or interesting texture. Simply by putting a piece of clothes made for a woman on a man's body, it changes the way the thing hangs and makes normal bodies like ours look cool. Well, not ALL the clothes, but if you try on twenty things, you will find four that are awesome, look cool and custom, require no alterations or additions, and cost fifty cents.

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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by FlyingMonkey » Tue Mar 28, 2017 9:19 am

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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by VultureChow » Tue Mar 28, 2017 9:20 am

Thrift stores are great for conventional sizes, shit for plus sizes. I have not once found something in a thrift store to wear to burning man.

I feel like many of the comments here miss the point. Of course there's no dress code. Of course you should feel comfortable in your skin wearing whatever you want.

But that's not what the OP asked for.

SOMETIMES WE WANT TO WEAR THE "BURNER UNIFORM"

Sometimes we want to wear neon bubble fur and disco skirts and whatever. And it can be damned hard to get that if you wear larger sizes.
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Chowski
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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by Chowski » Tue Mar 28, 2017 10:19 am

I find it strange that you cant find "plus size" clothing at thrift stores. I am 6'1" and 225 lbs. Not morbidly obese, but I'm a large man - XL or XXL by clothing sizing standards. I certainly can't find everything at thrift stores, but I have many, many pieces that came straight from some plus-size grandma's estate sale rejects. I think it's a matter of expectations. No, you are not going to find furry leg warmers or iridescent sparkle pony vests in larger sizes - those things cost money. But you can certainly find many large pieces of clothing that, with a little snip here and there, become functional and fashionable, brightly-colored and/or patterned playa-appropriate wear. If what you want is the sparkle pony look, there are plenty of shops on Etsy that will custom make you glitter pants and fur coats. But it's for a price.

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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by SteveInRealLife » Tue Mar 28, 2017 10:48 am

VultureChow wrote:Thrift stores are great for conventional sizes, shit for plus sizes. I have not once found something in a thrift store to wear to burning man.

I feel like many of the comments here miss the point. Of course there's no dress code. Of course you should feel comfortable in your skin wearing whatever you want.

But that's not what the OP asked for.

SOMETIMES WE WANT TO WEAR THE "BURNER UNIFORM"

Sometimes we want to wear neon bubble fur and disco skirts and whatever. And it can be damned hard to get that if you wear larger sizes.
Dude. There's absolutely a fucking dress code. Fur booties, fur vest, mankini. There's a dress code. If you don't wear the "right" Burner clothes, you look out of place. Some people like looking out of place as a matter of course, others don't.

If it's a matter of wanting to wear the dress code, by all means. Look at any picture of Burning Man participants online, go to a fabric store, buy blue and pink monster fur, and make booties, vests, and briefs in plus sizes. It's just that easy. Hot glue and velcro are the shit if you don't know how to use a sewing machine. Depending on how much hot glue and velcro you want to buy, you can make clothes that are customizable on the spot.

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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by VultureChow » Tue Mar 28, 2017 10:50 am

Chowski wrote:I find it strange that you cant find "plus size" clothing at thrift stores. I am 6'1" and 225 lbs. Not morbidly obese, but I'm a large man - XL or XXL by clothing sizing standards. I certainly can't find everything at thrift stores, but I have many, many pieces that came straight from some plus-size grandma's estate sale rejects. I think it's a matter of expectations. No, you are not going to find furry leg warmers or iridescent sparkle pony vests in larger sizes - those things cost money. But you can certainly find many large pieces of clothing that, with a little snip here and there, become functional and fashionable, brightly-colored and/or patterned playa-appropriate wear. If what you want is the sparkle pony look, there are plenty of shops on Etsy that will custom make you glitter pants and fur coats. But it's for a price.
XL, and XXL are fairly common men's sizes.

Plus size women's clothes are tough. Maybe the thrift stores are different here, But if there's 50 racks of regular size clothes, there's one of plus size.

Trust me, I've tried.

There's diminishing returns to time and effort. I can make 5 thrift store visits and find 1 thing that I pay $5 for, or I can go online and find something for $20 on ebay.
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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by SteveInRealLife » Tue Mar 28, 2017 10:50 am

Chowski wrote:I find it strange that you cant find "plus size" clothing at thrift stores. I am 6'1" and 225 lbs. Not morbidly obese, but I'm a large man - XL or XXL by clothing sizing standards. I certainly can't find everything at thrift stores, but I have many, many pieces that came straight from some plus-size grandma's estate sale rejects. I think it's a matter of expectations. No, you are not going to find furry leg warmers or iridescent sparkle pony vests in larger sizes - those things cost money. But you can certainly find many large pieces of clothing that, with a little snip here and there, become functional and fashionable, brightly-colored and/or patterned playa-appropriate wear. If what you want is the sparkle pony look, there are plenty of shops on Etsy that will custom make you glitter pants and fur coats. But it's for a price.
That's what I'm saying.

If you want to have fun and NOT wear the uniform, then go hunt stuff down and start customizing. If you want to look like a facebook update from Burning Man, you can buy that look in any size online.

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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by tatonka » Tue Mar 28, 2017 11:23 am

Sing this to yourself everyday , wear whatever , just believe :)


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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by FlyingMonkey » Tue Mar 28, 2017 12:17 pm

VultureChow wrote:T

But that's not what the OP asked for.

SOMETIMES WE WANT TO WEAR THE "BURNER UNIFORM"
Spot on VC. Back to the OP.

There are endless options for less than perfect bodies. At a local burn a camp mate had a marching band costume & it was great. Throw some felt flames on it, Own it!
costume1.jpg
I've seen people with unique hats, an interesting vest or coat & maybe a mask. A friend of mine makes incredible whole head animal masks our of paper mache. One year I made a Pope hat & covered it with lights & wore a robe with EL wire sewn in to it. vintage thrift store leisure suits look awesome.

During the day I like to be comfortable so I don't adhere to the "dress code". If I don't meet someones expectations by not being in costume for a few hours then Fuck yer Day. I can't deliver beer on my bike in a flaming bunny costume, sorry.

Foreign military uniforms can be interesting.

There's a lot of UV reactive paints that only show up under black-light. Have a camp-mate paint your face & have a hat with blinking UV LEDs.

I have also seen guys wear woman's clothing & just totally rock it. Robes & scarves can look awesome. Even on a dude. cover a belt in fairy lights to tie it.

I found some really unique ponchos in 2015. I had a beat up black stetson hat that had survived 2 burns. I loved it.

make a vest out of realistic looking kittens. Get an Elvis jump suit (he certainly didn't have a perfect body).

Foam, fabric & shitty sewing skills can go a long way. Consider accessories.

buy a hat & vest & accessorize it, make it your own. Just don't be moopy

Avoid Nevada prison uniforms.

One year I made a hat out of raw bacon & sealed it in epoxy. (it had a shelf life)

Bottom line, find something that you like that you are comfortable in that expresses who you are or want to be. Be creative & have fun.

Yeah, there are a lot of people with perfect bodies wearing colorful leggings & doing yoga. That's not me.
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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by FlyingMonkey » Tue Mar 28, 2017 12:25 pm

DerbyDave 18 wrote:I do make a lot of my own clothes but I and others who aren't one of the zero body fat group would love to find places either online or retail stores that carry clothes for people other than the one type of burner they all seem to cater to. I've found the Thai Fisherman pants and baggy things like that but would like to find more fun or unique types of clothes. I know that I will get responses that say no matter what size you are you should wear whatever you want but it would be nice to have more choices of types of clothes to choose from. Not everyone looks good in skin tight lycra or tiny shorts that barely cover your fun parts but still want a bit more interest or sex appeal than caftans and yoga pants.
Problem solved :-)
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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by VultureChow » Tue Mar 28, 2017 12:48 pm

Also look for retailers that cater to African American or Hispanic customers. Their mass merchandise tends to go to larger sizes, at least more than your average mall retailer.

If there's an aging mall in your town that has lost an anchor or two, you can check that out for some interesting options.
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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by lucky420 » Tue Mar 28, 2017 1:15 pm

Ponchos ! 8)
Oh my god, it's HUGE!

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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by SteveInRealLife » Tue Mar 28, 2017 1:52 pm

Pure sex appeal.

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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by EGAZ » Thu Mar 30, 2017 11:42 am

x3 PONCHOS!!

Steve, this line cracked me up.

"Something about not looking like a highlighter at a rave."

I would be a grocery store, 'wide highlighter'! HA! :shock:
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Outfit lights. ....... Not needed ...... :mrgreen:
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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by DerbyDave 18 » Fri Mar 31, 2017 6:25 pm

"FlyingMonkey

Love it! That's my uniform this year. Ming casual.

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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by DerbyDave 18 » Fri Mar 31, 2017 6:31 pm

BBadger wrote:You could, you know, make your own costumes and clothing and form your own style, rather than rely on whatever is "supposed" to be burner attire.

Those stores you're looking at are meant to attract people who really aren't that invested in making stuff but just want to look the part. You'll get a lot more compliments and respect for creating your own stuff.
Badger, the very first thing I wrote is that I do make my some of my own clothes. Unfortunately with my limited sewing skills and age making my hands and fingers shaky I can't do a whole lot anymore. If I could figure out how to post a pic I'd show you some of the stuff I wore my first year that I made but I haven't figured that out yet. I don't want what's supposed to be or what I think is proper attire. i just want more choice than the tons of things made for the young and beautiful which I'm not right now and that's fine with me.

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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by BBadger » Fri Mar 31, 2017 7:01 pm

To be honest, with exception to one garment (a hat), I don't bother, or haven't, making my own burner attire either. What I do, however, is throw whatever things I do find together.

You can make a nice outfit without having to do much modification. Even something as simple as finding a bunch of accessories or ornaments can make an otherwise plain outfit look quite a bit better looking. A comfortable pair of pants, a vest, a hat, and then some fancy belt with pockets or holsters can be functional as well as stylish, without the need to manufacture something yourself.

A lot of things look great because they look modified and custom. It doesn't mean that it was fabricated from scratch, but that you put some effort to decorate something. Something as simple as attaching pins or shiny things to your jacket can improve or at least change the look of what you have. Throw something together and you'll have an authentic look you created yourself.

For myself, I've been pretty darn happy with some of the samurai pants I found online at Etsy or places like that. Nice pockets and comfortable as well as nice prints. Since I needed to carry some stuff around I just fixed a belt around my waist and attached whatever I needed to that. I'm not going for any particular look, but I think it looks fine and fits in with whatever most people wear anyway (as if it mattered).
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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by FlyingMonkey » Fri Mar 31, 2017 11:07 pm

DerbyDave 18 wrote:"FlyingMonkey

Love it! That's my uniform this year. Ming casual.
Glad I could help. I think that would be awesome & very fun.
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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by gaminwench » Fri Mar 31, 2017 11:21 pm

Honestly, If I have all my personal stuff on/in my belt with pouches, my CamelBak/snacks loaded (with goggles and shemagh{functions as intergalactic towel!} attached), a warm wrap, comfortable boots, and my shade hat with lights, I'm good to go for several (playalicious) days and nights away from camp.

Nobody really gives a shit what you're wearing, that's a personal thing.
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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by maladroit » Sat Apr 01, 2017 3:29 pm

Just put on normal clothes, gear up with your water, bag of snacks, cup, goggles, and dust mask. Right before you leave camp, roll around in the dust, make sure to get some in your hair. Presto, you're playanonymous.

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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by ecoita » Thu Apr 06, 2017 11:34 am

I did notice on my last trip, there were thrift shops a plenty on the playa. I still have a loud Hawaiian shirt that was in really good quailty and were on special occasions in the DW. In my camp, we had a few " I'm cleaning out my costume bag, take want you want" moments. Some of my best outfits were from gifts like this. My plan for this year is to pack less and perhaps come back with more clothes?! Perhaps a bit risky, but worth all the fun and adventure!

Besides, I definitely packed way too may clothes (and socks) on my first trip.

Enjoy the ride!
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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by AntiM » Thu Apr 06, 2017 11:37 am

Larry and I find our playa wardrobe creeping into our lives. He got a great dashiki at Wardrobe Malfunktion at E-11, and gets tons of compliments on it ... on vacation.
15193527_10210091584104773_8754973333857539306_n.jpg
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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by Munkie » Fri Apr 07, 2017 4:34 pm

Go to Ebay, put 'cosplay' in the search bar. This will lead you to about a hundred different places that will make you what ever you want and in the measurements you provide. It'll be perfect for you! When it arrives from Hong Kong, you can bedazzle, dustify, glue and goggle it all the way to the trash fence and back. It'll be sweet and it'll be yours.

But, beware...the fabrics may say 'wool' and it probably won't be. So, be realistic and think about how things could go bad and order accordingly. I like to make my own things and franken-funk my fancy self, but I don't knock people who don't have the time or inspiration to do that. Heck, I can't paint to save my life, but that doesn't stop me from buying pictures to put on my wall to make my house happy and pretty.

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Re: Burner clothes for those without perfect bodies

Post by FlyingMonkey » Sat Apr 08, 2017 4:10 am

AntiM wrote:Larry and I find our playa wardrobe creeping into our lives. He got a great dashiki at Wardrobe Malfunktion at E-11, and gets tons of compliments on it ... on vacation.

15193527_10210091584104773_8754973333857539306_n.jpg

Sadly I scrolled down to click "Like" (there is no emoticon for hanging my head in shame)

I have been assimilated. Save me Burning Man.

But I Like this all the same :D
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