Social anxiety?

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xanaxfairy
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Social anxiety?

Post by xanaxfairy » Sat Jul 26, 2008 11:27 pm

As the event comes near, I worry about my propensity towards social anxiety and being painfully shy. What kinds of things can I do to get over this? Help a shy girl out!

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theCryptofishist
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Post by theCryptofishist » Sat Jul 26, 2008 11:40 pm

The Lady with a Lamprey

"The powerful are exploiting people, art and ideas, and this leads to us plebes debating how to best ration ice.
Man, no wonder they always win....." Lonesomebri

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gyre
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Re: Social anxiety?

Post by gyre » Sun Jul 27, 2008 1:00 am

xanaxfairy wrote:As the event comes near, I worry about my propensity towards social anxiety and being painfully shy. What kinds of things can I do to get over this? Help a shy girl out!
We don't like you already.
There.
Might as well relax and enjoy yourself.
Nothing to lose now. :)


I suppose you realize burning man is not a normal social situation.
Everyone there is there to have a good time with very few exceptions.

There will be people who don't like you and people you don't like.
Just keep going.
Most people are trying to have a pleasant time.

You probably realize that if you come across as having a lack of confidence, while being shy, it has the effect of being aversive to most people, sort of a self fulfilling prophecy.

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Sensei
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Post by Sensei » Sun Jul 27, 2008 1:16 am

Ooh, now let's get down tonight
Baby I'm hot just like an oven
I need some lovin'
And baby, I can't hold it much longer
It's getting stronger and stronger
And when I get that feeling
I want Sexual Healing
Sexual Healing, oh baby
Makes me feel so fine
Helps to relieve my mind
Sexual Healing baby, is good for me
Sexual Healing is something that's good for me
Whenever blue tear drops are falling
And my emotional stability is leaving me
There is something I can do
I can get on the telephone and call you up baby, and
Honey I know you'll be there to relieve me
The love you give to me will free me
If you don't know the things you're dealing
I can tell you, darling, that it's Sexual Healing
Get up, Get up, Get up, Get up, let's make love tonight
Wake up, Wake up, Wake up, Wake up, 'cos you do it right
Baby I got sick this morning
A sea was storming inside of me
Baby I think I'm capsizing
The waves are rising and rising
And when I get that feeling
I want Sexual Healing
Sexual Healing is good for me
Makes me feel so fine, it's such a rush
Helps to relieve the mind, and it's good for us
Sexual Healing, baby, is good for me
Sexual Healing is something that's good for me
And it's good for me and it's good to me
My baby ohhh
Come take control, just grab a hold
Of my body and mind soon we'll be making it
Honey, oh we're feeling fine
You're my medicine open up and let me in
Darling, you're so great
I can't wait for you to operate
I can't wait for you to operate
When I get this feeling, I need Sexual Healing

- (Marvin Gaye/David Ritz/Odell Brown)

xanaxfairy
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OH

Post by xanaxfairy » Sun Jul 27, 2008 1:19 am

Nobody likes me already. Think I'll go eat worms. : (

hsdavis
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Re: OH

Post by hsdavis » Sun Jul 27, 2008 2:58 am

xanaxfairy wrote:Nobody likes me already. Think I'll go eat worms. : (
Wow, I found somebody else that likes worms. I think I like you already! :D
Don't be anxious. You will see incredible art installations. You will meet nice, unassuming people like yourself. You will share your water on the deep playa with someone who ran out and you will see how easy it is to make new friends who are in the exact same position as you. You will be standing dead center of a massive dust storm and get the overwhelming feeling that you are surrounded by hundreds of kind, compassionate friends who would help you out in any adverse situation. You will feel like a part of humanity not just a shy observer. As the dust starts to settle, you will feel a bit foolish for being so apprehensive in the first place and then you will feel even more stupid for taking so long to attend this event.
Relax and get ready to enjoy the nicest, life altering week you have ever had. Welcome to the playa!

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TomServo
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Post by TomServo » Sun Jul 27, 2008 8:37 am

you'll be fine xanaxfairy!
anything worth doing is worth overdoing..

xanaxfairy
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:D

Post by xanaxfairy » Sun Jul 27, 2008 8:38 am

awwww thank you! : ) Worms on me : )

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TomServo
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Post by TomServo » Sun Jul 27, 2008 9:17 am

come by the roller disco..we got skates..and hoola hoops i think...they may have hid em last year. but great people!
anything worth doing is worth overdoing..

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gyre
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Post by gyre » Sun Jul 27, 2008 9:18 am

Nome wasn't built in a day.

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mdmf007
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Post by mdmf007 » Sun Jul 27, 2008 9:38 am

You cant drive to Nome either

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JezebelinHell
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Post by JezebelinHell » Sun Jul 27, 2008 10:06 am

I would think the Xanax portion of your name would probably help out a lot. If it doesn't get rid of your anxiety you can just hand it out to people and I promise it will make them like you.

I'm sure you'll be fine. It's a pretty chill environment, which makes it easier to open up and relax.
"The future is a whore, she promises herself to everyone."
--Poe

twinwitin
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Post by twinwitin » Sun Jul 27, 2008 11:17 am

This is my first burn, and I also am feeling some anxiety, a state I am not used to. What if you leave "you" behind? Not the inner you, just the shy you? you could design your costumes around a personality you always wanted, or wear a mask, then you can be whoever you want! I have decided to be a pirate, a'ho,a bunny.... the list goes on. As you pack your car, remember to pack your anxiety, and shyness in a "drawer" and just leave them behind. You can always take them out later when you get home, but who knows? I have read on e-playa, alot of thearaputic stories happening at Burning Man. Easy for me to say, I know, I know, just remember there will be other shy,anxious people there. Hey Shy camp!!!! :D

xanaxfairy
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Smiles

Post by xanaxfairy » Sun Jul 27, 2008 1:15 pm

twinwitin: great advice!
"As you pack your car, remember to pack your anxiety, and shyness in a "drawer" and just leave them behind. You can always take them out later when you get home, but who knows?"

I love what you have to say here...I am more than excited to pack my shyness away : ) And we should definitely have shy camp! I am sure this is a problem for many people.

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Marscrumbs
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Nobody loves us,everybody hates us. Let's go eat some worms!

Post by Marscrumbs » Sun Jul 27, 2008 1:22 pm

xanaxfairy wrote:Nobody likes me already. Think I'll go eat worms. : (
....Long fat juicy ones, pinching them, watching them squirms. Ok I forgot how R. Crumb puts it exactly

For the social shy the playa offers plently of wilderness in the back forty. I take advantage of it when I need a mental brea

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sunn
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Post by sunn » Sun Jul 27, 2008 7:42 pm

Remember that whenever you feel a bit overwhelmed, there's always a nice chill space somewhere you can go to rest in and get out of the heat. Center camp, even, where you can regroup and just people watch and make a new friend or two. Or get a cool drink. Or go back to your own camp and take a little nap and get away from it all for a bit. Another thing is that there are wonderful people/resources at BM like the Heebee Jebee camp (look up in your directory you'll get) where you can go get a massage or talk to a counselor. I did some volunteer life coaching there and talked to a some people who described just what you're talking about. It really helps to have someone to talk to.
And...you may not even have anything to worry about at all. Take it a day at a time. It's different for each person and an incredible experience. Enjoy the journey!

AKAparttime
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Post by AKAparttime » Sun Jul 27, 2008 10:37 pm

Xanaxfairy

Aloha
The root of anxiety as I have been told is (The fear of loss) that being said...
What do you fear to lose?

Look at that and move past it..........

~Parttime

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BitterDan
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Post by BitterDan » Sun Jul 27, 2008 11:01 pm

And we should definitely have shy camp!
We had a shy camp but everybody was too shy to sign up. :oops:
Camp FuckIt + MT - 7:15 & D (maybe)

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theCryptofishist
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Post by theCryptofishist » Sun Jul 27, 2008 11:05 pm

BitterDan wrote:
And we should definitely have shy camp!
We had a shy camp but everybody was too shy to sign up. :oops:
And then it was taken over by obnoxious bossy camp. Those poor shysters were so bullied by temple burn that crestfallen doesn't begin to describe it.
The Lady with a Lamprey

"The powerful are exploiting people, art and ideas, and this leads to us plebes debating how to best ration ice.
Man, no wonder they always win....." Lonesomebri

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JezebelinHell
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Post by JezebelinHell » Mon Jul 28, 2008 6:21 am

I used to get pretty bad anxiety and I was on lots of fun medications that turned me into a zombie/crazy person. In the end I wound up dropping the medications and just forcing myself to deal with what I was feeling and why I was feeling it. If you want to go introduce yourself to a fun looking camp and you start to get that nauseous feeling in the pit of your stomach you need to force yourself to logically figure out what you're so afraid of. I know anxiety can come from seemingly nowhere (I had random attacks for no reason pretty frequently) but you need to run through the scenario in your head until you've talked yourself out of being afraid. It's really fucking hard to do, but in the end it's so much better than being drugged up all the time.

If you know you have a really hard time approaching people, you just need to find a good reason to approach them. Bring around an interactive gift or a community art project. Just having something to talk about right off the bat will take away a lot of the nerves that go along with social anxiety. The year I met and hung out with the most random people was the year my camp did an interactive photo scavenger hunt. We had to collect swag and take pictures of ourselves doing things like getting piggy back rides from Rangers and kissing Death Guild chicks. Having that list in hand made it so incredibly easy for me to talk to people. I was a fucking social butterfly by the end of the day.
"The future is a whore, she promises herself to everyone."
--Poe

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Marscrumbs
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Transformation

Post by Marscrumbs » Mon Jul 28, 2008 9:16 am

Have you concidered wearing a mask? That can allow you to explore a whole new alter identity.

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Badger
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Post by Badger » Mon Jul 28, 2008 10:19 am

I worry about my propensity towards social anxiety and being painfully shy. What kinds of things can I do to get over this? Help a shy girl out!
A half bottle of Woodford Reserve bourbon and (2) 50 mg tabs of time release Jack-Ass(TM) should get things jump started for you.
Desert dogs drink deep.

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Kinetik V
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Post by Kinetik V » Mon Jul 28, 2008 1:00 pm

I would STRONGLY recommend the following:

Image

or the new extra-strength version!

Image

Believe me, it works.
Kinetic V
~~~~~~
I bring order to chaos. And I bring chaos to those who deserve it, wherever that may be.

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Ugly Dougly
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Post by Ugly Dougly » Tue Jul 29, 2008 10:42 am

I would STRONGLY recommend the following:
Image


Believe me, it works.

xanaxfairy
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Post by xanaxfairy » Tue Jul 29, 2008 10:05 pm

A half bottle of Woodford Reserve bourbon should get things jump started for you.[/quote]

Perhaps alcohol is the best social lubricant! : ) thankxxx
And UglyDougly, I luv your idea as well!

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Captain Goddammit
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Post by Captain Goddammit » Tue Jul 29, 2008 10:24 pm

Uglas Douglas wrote:I would STRONGLY recommend the following:
Image


Believe me, it works.
You can count on me to be the pharmacist filling this prescription!
GreyCoyote: "At this rate it wont be long before he is Admiral Fukkit."

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CLARKcon
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Post by CLARKcon » Wed Jul 30, 2008 7:32 pm

After the first day soaks in, you'll have to find some time to giggle to yourself about feeling anxious :D Just watch/feel/hear the flow around you...you'll probably notice the vibe is very human :wink:
☕ COFFEE CAMP :
"The Social Hub of the Uncivilized World"

.: 🔥)'(🔥 2020 // ...???... :.

honeyfire
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At Burning man, i'm normal...

Post by honeyfire » Thu Jul 31, 2008 1:49 pm

Xfairy, it's my impression that social anxiety is based in being afraid of being rejected/ridiculed.
In the outside world, rejection and ridicule are usually based in the r/r'ers fear of the unknown or discomfort with the unfamilar. Basically, people get mean when things get weird.

At the Burn, however, it's all about embracing the unfamiliar, doing the samba with the unknown, and there's no such thing as weird.
There might be people with whom you do not share common interests, but there'd not gonna be much of anyone who's gonna reject you for being a freak.
We are freak, that's why we're here.

The thing i've seen people get rejected for is bad manners, and everyone i've ever met who has social anxiety has lovely manners, so just go be as outgoing as you feel like being.

Here's to a lovely Burn for you, XFairy, and all y'all else here... *smile*
I'm just trying not to be liveMOOP...

Civil rights: use 'em or lose 'em!

xanaxfairy
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thankx

Post by xanaxfairy » Thu Jul 31, 2008 11:26 pm

Thanks for your kind words, honeyfire. : ) ~Big Hugs~

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chiefdanfox
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Post by chiefdanfox » Thu Jul 31, 2008 11:33 pm

Just grin. Big, large. Your grinning mug will be the key. Every lock will yield.

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