Fuck!

[Mojojita]

((((((OR & CO))))))

Fuck

[theCryptofishist]

Possible help in times of Fuck!

[MyDearFriend]

Fuck, (((ORed))) & (((CO))). I shudder to think of the transplant team standing by like a row of vultures, and then I realize I know of a 10 month old baby in California waiting for a liver. Not a good spot for anybody to be in. Really hard. Fuck.

Did we ever hear back about Bin Noddin's fucking biopsy????

[ygmir]

no fuckin news from Bin.....I sure hope all is well!!

and what the fuck? in the last two days, 3 people I know have had a family member try suicide, one failed.

[theCryptofishist]

... 3 people I know have had a family member try suicide, one failed.

This is ambiguous. It would be nicely ambiguous if the topic weren't so fucking hard.

[ygmir]

... 3 people I know have had a family member try suicide, one failed.

This is ambiguous. It would be nicely ambiguous if the topic weren't so fucking hard.

ambiguous?.........sad and scary, yeah, but seems clear. too fuckin clear. This is not ok!!

[theCryptofishist]

... 3 people I know have had a family member try suicide, one failed.

This is ambiguous. It would be nicely ambiguous if the topic weren't so fucking hard.

ambiguous?.........sad and scary, yeah, but seems clear. too fuckin clear. This is not ok!!

If you fail at suicide, did you live? or die?

Otherwise, yes, this is horrible.

[ygmir]

... 3 people I know have had a family member try suicide, one failed.

This is ambiguous. It would be nicely ambiguous if the topic weren't so fucking hard.

ambiguous?.........sad and scary, yeah, but seems clear. too fuckin clear. This is not ok!!

If you fail at suicide, did you live? or die?

Otherwise, yes, this is horrible.

well fuck, yeah I can see emotionally how it'd sound ambiguous, but, as an "attempted action", success would be completion (intended outcome) of said act.

[OregonRed]

It's all just fuckin' awful. I am realizing how NOT emotionally equipped I am to handle this. How the fuck am I supposed to comfort my friend when I can't make any sense out of this myself? How does one comfort a parent whose child has chosen to end their life? I feel so fucking helpless. I want to scream...

[ygmir]

It's all just fuckin' awful. I am realizing how NOT emotionally equipped I am to handle this. How the fuck am I supposed to comfort my friend when I can't make any sense out of this myself? How does one comfort a parent whose child has chosen to end their life? I feel so fucking helpless. I want to scream...

and there, Red, fuckin right there, is the fuckin humanity in you!!
You don't need to explain it......it is, it happened. Your want to "fix" it for your friend is the caring human you are.......and yes, you should scream and cry and cuss and spit!!
and you might consider, when done, going to you friend, hold them, don't try to fix or explain anything...........just offer hugs, and help her scream and cuss and cry..........break shit, drink and puke. But don't fix or try to fix what can't be fixed........just being there for your friend is the best. And if and when she needs to be alone, allow her, assuring her you are but a whisper away, and let her know, your heart will tell you if she needs you, even if she does not reach out..........and you'll be there.

yer fuckin good to care.

[OregonRed]

Thank you, Yggy. Your wisdom and humanity are both comforting and humbling.


*Edited to add FUCK.

[burner von braun]

I too would be ill-equiped to know just the right things to say OR. But the thing is, an old friend being there, just being there, shows her that there is still some light left, in what must seem at the moment to be a very dark world.

(((OR & CO and friend)))

[^Rhino!]

My condolences, OR, to you and your friend.

Yggy's advice is prime, as usual.

Looking at it from my own experiences, I'll say this......you and your friend will go through the classic 'stages' of disbelief (Fuck, it didn't happen) to anger (Fuck this for happening!) to grief (Fuck! Oh, woe is me!) and gradually begin to start healing. At THAT point, what you need to remember above all is that we're all in this thing called 'life' temporarily. We can gnash our teeth, moan, cry, yell, break things, get totally wasted, but the facts don't change. Grab those memories that you have that are great ones of the departed, and hold them close to your heart. Celebrate their life by learning from those memories....they'll be with you always.

I keep remembering the final scene from 'The Last Samurai' where the emperor looks down on Tom Cruise, tears filling his eyes and his voice halting, and says, "Tell me how he died."

Cruise looks up at the emperor, and in a voice full of awe for the departed, says, "No, but let me tell you how he LIVED."

And that's the lesson for us all. How we LIVE life is far more important than how we die.` Remember those things from the life that were most important, and heartwarming. Those memories that we hold dear will bring the most comfort in our sorrow.

(((((Oregon Red))))) and (((((CO)))))

[Mojojita]

Oh FUCK, dear Red......

The answer to your question is that there IS no way to make sense of this - it will never make sense. You have my thoughts and prayers.

Mental Illness takes lives just like cancer or other diseases, sometimes you can see it coming but can't stop it and sometimes it just hits like a black lightning bolt.

[Princess Peach]

me too. fuck yer mum!

the fucking princess

you rang?

[theCryptofishist]

Maybe five years ago. You're a neglectful mom...

[OregonRed]

Fuck, this is hard. It's all so fucking surreal. I'm here. My friend is grateful that I am. She says I'm helping. I am glad that I can do that, but I still feel fucking helpless is the face of her grief.

Fuck.

[ygmir]

good fuckin on ya O.R. for being there........best thing you can do!! hang the fuck in, hang the fuck on, and cry a fuckin river. You've done the greatest deed a friend can do, sharing the fuckin grief!!

[Ratty]

Just 'being there' is a gift. There is no way you can console or lighten her load. Hug, kiss, cry, repeat.

[^Rhino!]

FUCK.

Kilika passed away over the weekend.

I last saw him at the burn in 2010, though we were in touch at least once a month.

I'll miss him. A lot.

Pardon me if I drop off the board for a while. I feel very numb.

[ygmir]

fuckin sorry ^Rhino.........dang it!

[FossaFerox]

Christmas is cancelled. At least my present to myself is.

Fuck!

[Box Burner]

fuck Fossa. That would have been a nice gift too. That truly fucking sucks!

[Elliot]

FUCK.

Kilika passed away over the weekend.

I last saw him at the burn in 2010, though we were in touch at least once a month.

I'll miss him. A lot.

Pardon me if I drop off the board for a while. I feel very numb.

Fuck! That sounds like a major loss. But I may not have met Kilika, so how about you tell us?

[pinemom]

I fucking hate to disappear off the forums for a yr only to find this FUCKING thread still at the fucking top!
Fuck all the bads in our fucking wonderful lives.

Too bad it seems to touch the least deserving people in the world most of the time.

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((The whole wide fucking world)))))))))))))))))))))))))))) needs these hugs...

[Patsh]

nice thing about those loving hugs...
you always get one back!


Thanks, Piney!!!

edit: oops, I meant "those loving fuckin' hugs"

[^Rhino!]

FUCK.

Kilika passed away over the weekend.

I last saw him at the burn in 2010, though we were in touch at least once a month.

I'll miss him. A lot.

Pardon me if I drop off the board for a while. I feel very numb.

Hi, all, I'm back.

Sometimes, we can be foolish when the answer is sitting there staring directly us in the face. I apologize for my foolishness and thus will attempt to atone for my weakness. I wrote something IN THIS THREAD (kicks self for not reading through HIS OWN posts) earlier about the movie "The Last Samurai" that tells us "Ask not how he died, but how he LIVED."

Chris (Kilika) was a friend. He was gay, not that that had to do with anything. He and Scott (Koka) had been committed partners for 25 years when Scott died or a heart attack a couple of years ago. I got a call at 1:30 in the morning when he told me. Luckily, there were people around in the area, but I kept calling him week after week until he found someone new, just simply to tell him that he was an OK kind of guy.

He finally got better. He found someone new, but he never forgot that I stood by him in his time of need. He really appreciated it. We kept up our hippy bashing ways (One of my favorite messages to leave him was "Hello, this is Hippies R Us....this phone call is to inform you that your 55-gallon drum of patchouli oil is in...") to maintain his humor. We'd laugh, and the phone calls were a bright spot in his life. AND mine as well.

He gifted me with a 4 oz chunk of turquoise in 2010, one of the last pieces produced by the Number 8 mine in Nevada. That mine is now buried under a million tons of gold ore at a heap leaching facility. I still have it, and will treasure it always.

Goodbye, Chris. You will be missed, bro.

[Elliot]

...
Hi, all, I'm back.
...
Goodbye, Chris. You will be missed, bro.

Celebrate his life, fuck yeah!

[Elorrum]

Rhino, good to have you here. Your stories of a good friend keep him vital in your mind, and share him around, keeping him vital in the world too. That's what we can do for the good folks we've known.

Edit to add: FUCK, I thought I was posting in the BAR thread. Fuck. well, you get it.

My Dad died Thanksgiving morning, and I seem to relive it every year for a while, then I switch to the good things, the fun things, and all the laughs. so, that's fucking life.

[unjonharley]

Fuck your fictional day,, Now, go eat and then kill the hand that feeds you.......