Dear Evil Rob and SurlyTart,

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Tue Aug 02, 2005 4:24 pm

Dear Evil Rob,

While I've heard many sad sounding names for male genitalia, 'Clifford Notes' is new to me. Please come here and I'll be sure to coax him out. However, please be forewarned that as I've been exercising quite a lot of late I may not have my usual finesse. I'll need you to sign a waver - i mean, waiver - before attempting any such, um, operation.

Ham fistedly,
surly

p.s. I might also point out that if this isn't a satisfactory answer, you can simply get new pants. I am often in Klown Jelly's Pantz, and it doesn't even require his presence. After being taken in they fit quite well, too.

desertswine · Post by **desertswine** » Thu Aug 04, 2005 5:52 pm

Dear Rob,according to the 3 eyed fish thing,it seems to her,we are soulmates.Do you have a fondness for barnyard animals,albino peruvian circus midgets and being smothered in warm caramel sauce?She knows me to well.Lothos :evil: :twisted: :evil: :twisted: :evil: :twisted:

cowboyangel · Post by **cowboyangel** » Wed Aug 10, 2005 6:26 pm

Dear Rob, please give 5 reasons why I should ignore my financial and scholastic responsibilities, and go the fuck to BurningMan....

cowboyangel · Post by **cowboyangel** » Sun Aug 14, 2005 11:24 am

never mind Rob, I caught your post in meetNgreet.....Hope you will consider coming back sometime....there are plenty of mystical experiences waiting for you there....

Rob the Wop · Post by **Rob the Wop** » Mon Aug 15, 2005 3:09 pm

desertswine wrote:Dear Rob,according to the 3 eyed fish thing,it seems to her,we are soulmates.Do you have a fondness for barnyard animals,albino peruvian circus midgets and being smothered in warm caramel sauce?She knows me to well.Lothos

Dear Lothos:evil:twisted oh blather, get a shorter name,

The fish only has one eye. You have a severe drinking problem. Start operating heavy machinery NOW.

And I have no fondness for ANY member of your family, thank you.

Blatheringly,
Evil Rob

Rob the Wop · Post by **Rob the Wop** » Mon Aug 15, 2005 3:19 pm

cowboyangel wrote:Dear Rob, please give 5 reasons why I should ignore my financial and scholastic responsibilities, and go the fuck to BurningMan....

Dear Unsigned,

1) Ravers taste like chicken, are easier to catch, and there is less sympathy preparing them.
2) Baring Rainbow Gatherings and your grandfather's house, you won't be able to see a 60 year old penis with a smiley face drawn on it.
3) Playa dust prevents STDs and pregnancy. Experiment all you like without condoms.
4) Burning Man is the only place where women appreciate being told that you would like to see their breasts. Loudly. Repeatedly. Drunk.
5) In Vegas, you can't get run over by a blinking purple Mexican staring frog being driven by an alien and a neon toadstool in a pink skirt.

Convincingly,
Evil Rob

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Mon Aug 15, 2005 4:33 pm

Oh Sages of the Great Northwest

It seems that I will not have to get pregnant to avoid bleeding on site this year. To whom should I give my gift certificate for the frozen sperm and other stud services?

Isotopia · Post by **Isotopia** » Mon Aug 15, 2005 4:34 pm

Dear Rob, please give 5 reasons why I should ignore my financial and scholastic responsibilities, and go the fuck to BurningMan....

1) Because you can't walk into Chem 401 naked.

2) Because your frat brothers will think differently of you should you show up at a pledge meeting wearing a sun dress and your toe nails painted.

3) Dorm mates get kinda edgy if you've not showered after five days.

4) Campus police tackle you when you start screaming "Burn the motherfucker!!" on a Tuesday morning at 3:30 am.

5) No one gifts you the answers to your calculus exam.

Driveway · Post by **Driveway** » Tue Aug 16, 2005 9:32 pm

Two questions...number one:

Han Solo...or Indiana Jones?

Number two:

Should I have sex on the internet for money?
[yes, this actually is a real dillemma in my life]

Crapfully yours
Driveway.

desertswine · Post by **desertswine** » Thu Aug 18, 2005 3:09 am

Hey fish lady thingy,after sangria suare at the lamplighters on tuesday night,anything is possible,and you know where to find me.Lothos

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Thu Sep 15, 2005 3:31 pm

Dear Evil Rob and Slurry Tart,

I'm going to bed early enough, and getting up no earlier than 5am. Why do I feel so tired?

Sleepily,
she who took over surly's log in

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Thu Sep 15, 2005 3:43 pm

Rian Jackson wrote:Dear Evil Rob and Slurry Tart,

I'm going to bed early enough, and getting up no earlier than 5am. Why do I feel so tired?

Sleepily,
she who took over surly's log in

who are you and what have you done with Surly?????

and try staying up for several days...you'll get a weird 'buzz' of energy that can last for hours...

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Thu Sep 15, 2005 4:03 pm

and try staying up for several days...you'll get a weird 'buzz' of energy that can last for hours...

a homicidal buzz?

who are you and what have you done with Surly?????

see above

angelface · Post by **angelface** » Mon Sep 19, 2005 3:22 pm

Dear ER and ST...

How did Surley get to be so fucking CUTE?

-evil angel

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Mon Sep 19, 2005 3:33 pm

Dark Angel

By draining the blood from puppies and kittens.

Freelancer

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Wed Sep 21, 2005 8:25 pm

Dear evil angel,

Clearly you need your sensory nodes checked. And in the meantime, you might adjust your cause-effect relationship chip. There seems to be some malfunction. Never taunt someone who knows the location of your bedroom window.

And, in answer to your question, any transformation into the awesome being of terror and majesty that you see is largely due to hacking babies into bits with bolt cutters. The torture of domestic animals was only a start.

Menacingly,
The Tart of Surl

angelface · Post by **angelface** » Wed Sep 21, 2005 10:54 pm

Rian Jackson wrote:Dear evil angel,

Clearly you need your sensory nodes checked. And in the meantime, you might adjust your cause-effect relationship chip. There seems to be some malfunction. Never taunt someone who knows the location of your bedroom window.

And, in answer to your question, any transformation into the awesome being of terror and majesty that you see is largely due to hacking babies into bits with bolt cutters. The torture of domestic animals was only a start.

Menacingly,
The Tart of Surl

Well... I do like small animals, but I'm not so big on babies, so whatever it takes. Oh, and all my nodes or whatever are working just fine..

It's true though, you do know the location of my bedroom window.. so maybe I'll just stick to wondering how you became so fucking surly.. Do tell.

hugs and kisses,
evil angel

EvilDustBooger · Post by **EvilDustBooger** » Fri Sep 23, 2005 8:10 am

Dear Evil Knob & Sweet Tart,

What The Fuck ???

And please feel free to elaborate.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Fri Jun 30, 2006 12:31 pm

Bumping for Tisha