B.Man Experience Compatibility Criteria

Lydia Love · Post by **Lydia Love** » Wed Sep 17, 2003 8:47 am

Now onto polyamorous chicken fucking...

clandyone · Post by **clandyone** » Wed Sep 17, 2003 12:25 pm

I wasn't talking about polyamory per se, although that seems to be a workable option for some.

Humans have social needs and needs for companionship that cannot possibly be fulfilled by just one person, even if the humans in question are only fucking/living with/raising kids with one person. There's nothing wrong with being able to share things with a friend or new acquantance that you can't with a partner -- why should partners be expected to share every trait/interest/pastime?

There's this culturally-bound idea that once one is sewn up in a relationship that that should be enough, that all one's emotional needs should be taken care of, and that's that. So people hook up, and disappear for months or years, and emerge tear-stained and trembling after having been dumped by someone whose "needs weren't being met". Well, duh.

All right, I'm getting even more redundant than usual. On to the chicken fucking.

Flux · Post by **Flux** » Wed Sep 17, 2003 12:32 pm

clandyone wrote:I wasn't talking about polyamory per se, although that seems to be a workable option for some.

Yeah, neither was I, actually, but I failed to make that clear.

I think you've hit the nail right on the head here, clandyone. I understand people who want sexually- and romantically-exclusive relationships; I was one of those people for many years. Heck, I might be one again someday.

What I can't for the life of me understand is people who get into a relationship and immediately begin demanding, or at least lobbying for, the other person to drop all of their friends of the opposite sex or even, in some extreme cases, of the same sex.

I would drive my wife (even more) insane if I didn't have other friends; her encouraging my friendships is as crucial to her mental stability as it is to my own!

blyslv · Post by **blyslv** » Wed Sep 17, 2003 12:59 pm

bgirl wrote:You are not offended when a naked man,who claims to be Mary Magdelene, offers to wash your feet.

Yeah, that one goes on MY pile of unrealized projects. Only I was going to be Cinderfella.

blyslv · Post by **blyslv** » Wed Sep 17, 2003 1:05 pm

clandyone wrote:I'm gonna try not to get all Mean Eplaya here, but this
We've met alot of people who go alone, leaving hubby or wife or someone behind, and find themselves having intense sexual and nonsexual experiences with others
If you're going to cheat on your partner, you're no kind of partner at all, Burning Man or no Burning Man.

I think it was her original point, at least that's what I got out of her post. Both my burns have been with my lover, and we wouldn't have it any other way. We get along better there then in the default world for some strange reason.

BTW clandyone -- you and your husband were so totally cute dressed in white at the M&G.

blyslv · Post by **blyslv** » Wed Sep 17, 2003 1:08 pm

Booker wrote: I don't go lookin' for sex on the playa and it doesn't seem to come lookin' for me, so that's no big issue.

hhhmmmmm

blyslv · Post by **blyslv** » Wed Sep 17, 2003 1:11 pm

clandyone wrote:The assumption that one's partner has to represent the alpha and omega of one's existence is, I think, the primary cause of the sky-high divorce rate in this country. You gotta diversify. Feeling guilty about making connections with people outside the relationship is just ridiculous.

I've honestly come around to the conclusion that a key to a good, healthy relationship is low expectations.

Last night I went to dinner with some freinds, one of whom brought her 2 year old son. Life is good for this kid, there is never ending amazement and everyhting is new. But I was struck by the way we all triued to entertain him and get him to light up. What does this do to his worldview that makes it seem as if thge whole world is revovling around him? What happens when it ceases.

I'd better stop before I start sounding really grumpy.

clandyone · Post by **clandyone** » Wed Sep 17, 2003 1:22 pm

blyslv wrote: BTW clandyone -- you and your husband were so totally cute dressed in white at the M&G.

Awwww, thanks! Of course I spilled red wine on my beautiful Princess Leia dress -- oh well, now it's an artifact instead of a garment, which is fine.

My husband is very cute. I am not described as "cute" very often -- I hear "tall and scary" much more frequently. I guess I've become cute by association.

blyslv · Post by **blyslv** » Wed Sep 17, 2003 4:40 pm

clandyone wrote: I guess I've become cute by association.

OK yeah, like what a totally cute couple. Got that yin/yang going. But you don't scare me, cutey-poo

Zane5100 · Post by **Zane5100** » Wed Sep 17, 2003 4:59 pm

clandyone wrote:I hear "tall and scary" much more frequently.

I would bet not as frequently as I do.

III · Post by **III** » Wed Sep 17, 2003 5:00 pm

>I guess I've become cute by association.

i haven't met y'all in person, so my impression of your character is based mostly on what you write here, as well as that dinky lil avatar shot, but seems to me that you're more than adequately cute in your own right.

ceejmo · Post by **ceejmo** » Wed Sep 17, 2003 6:10 pm

My husband is very cute.

aawwww shucks

Booker · Post by **Booker** » Wed Sep 17, 2003 6:14 pm

Agree w/ III. All the people who were there that I didn't get to meet. Shit, shit, shit. Someday, I'm gettin' more organized, I swear.

aforceforgood · Post by **aforceforgood** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 1:00 am

PJ wrote:
aforceforgood wrote:crying babies are not welcome much of anywhere.
Mommies love them though. At least, until the sleep deprivation pushes them over the edge.

Yeah, well, just like I love my squabbling married friends and small children IN SPITE of said unpleasant noise, I doubt any mother who's not medicated or nuts would claim their wailing whelp's screams are music to her ears, nor would most people find squabbling people more fun to be around than, say, a porcupine fighting with a skunk inside a closet.

With all the billions we're pumping into the school system, I'm surprised there isn't even one class on the most basic of survival skills- keeping one's bitching to one's self...

Stormy · Post by **Stormy** » Sun Sep 21, 2003 10:24 pm

Kinetic wrote:
Not everyone's going to be fun, but agreeable would be nice. We're all going to be grumbling if we're riding out the second hour of a dust storm like we had on that last Sunday for example. And I wouldn't want the Temple of Atonement people to be fun, I want them serious!

Yeah, it's strict rule-- no one at Temple of Atonement gets to have fun.

Oh, and about control freaks...

Green Wood · Post by **Green Wood** » Fri Sep 11, 2009 9:07 pm

But we did it at BM and she or he then said it was the best BM ever therefore....

Ugly Dougly · Post by **Ugly Dougly** » Sat Sep 12, 2009 10:39 am

The mission of this thread is to scare away about 90% of all potential future spectators or participants.

- You enjoy burning through thousands of dollars on a desperate party in the desert.