Sorry if there's been any confusion.
I used to be "StarBoy." For verification, go to www.spectrumhomeinspection.com/pers.htm
and notice that I'm not a country and western singer with bad 'tude and terminal cancer, shoot me an email to any of the site addresses calling me an obsequious sanctimonius fuckwit (OSF) and I'll shoot you one back. Maybe later tonight I'll place an obligatory StarBoy reference at the bottom of the page.
I deleted all my posts from the BM board, no matter what the subject. Call it whatever you want...I'm chosing to call it radical self expression. Sorry if anyone's been inconvenienced.
I renamed this thread because Zane, I think, said that mentioning chicken fucking and PJ's avatar was the only way to kill the thread for sure. I meant it as kind of a humorous farewell.
But of course...I'm still here. Sorta.
I'm having the worst fucking time getting back to real life. The worst. It doesn't help that I've been addicted to the e-playa, trying to squeeze fucking Tinkerbell until she poots out some more magic playa dust on me. I'm like one of those crazed junkies in Reefer Madness. ("Faster! Faster! Faster!") My decompression is not going well.
I'm still in a really deep funk. I've got to cut the cord at some point and get back to real life. I decided that I had to cut the cord here. But I kept coming back to read posts even though I wasn't posting anymore, kept looking at threads I'd started.
So, fuck it all, I just deleted them.
Sorry. I'm a recovering alcohlic/addict with 6 years clean, and sometimes my way of dealing with shit ain't so pretty. Almost feel like in a way that what I found at BM was better than any drug or drink I've ever had, and being an addict, well...I WANT MORE. But since I've got this history of overdoing it...more can be a very, very dangerous thing.
My deleting my posts, in my mind, was the basic equivalent of pouring that last bottle of Jack Daniels down the drain.
I wouldn't have responded this time 'cept that you took my actions and seemed to get even more p.o.'ed at Tawnee thinking they were her actions.
Not that, at this point, I even care about Tawnee's feelings. Just hated to see such a nice guy and voice of reason amongst the flames finally develop a caldera after blowing his top.
One request...if anyone's got anything to say to me or want to discuss what an e-dweeb I am, please PM me from here or EMAIL ME from my site, rather than post. The fewer reasons I have to come back here for now the better.