Things that sound dirty but aren't.

All things outside of Burning Man.
Post Reply
User avatar
theCryptofishist
Posts: 40313
Joined: Mon Feb 23, 2004 9:28 am
Burning Since: 2017
Location: In Exile

Things that sound dirty but aren't.

Post by theCryptofishist » Thu Mar 30, 2006 2:28 pm

Okay, I stole it from elsewhere.

But with a thread called wood construction question I just couldn't help myself.
The Lady with a Lamprey

"The powerful are exploiting people, art and ideas, and this leads to us plebes debating how to best ration ice.
Man, no wonder they always win....." Lonesomebri

User avatar
The CO
Posts: 1670
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 10:56 am
Burning Since: 1996
Camp Name: M*A*S*H 4207th/404://Village Not Found
Location: I-CORPS, M*A*S*H HQ, Van Nuts, CA

Post by The CO » Thu Mar 30, 2006 2:29 pm

Steaming manhole.
M*A*S*H 4207th: An army of fun.
I don't care what the borg says: feather-wearers will NOT be served in Rosie's Bar.
When I ask how many burns, I mean at BRC.

User avatar
Ugly Dougly
Posts: 17499
Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2003 9:31 am
Burning Since: 1996
Location: เชียงใหม่

Post by Ugly Dougly » Thu Mar 30, 2006 3:07 pm


User avatar
EspressoDude
Posts: 4920
Joined: Tue Jan 24, 2006 7:30 pm
Location: the first Vancouver
Contact:

Post by EspressoDude » Thu Mar 30, 2006 3:23 pm

MUDBATH
Is 4 shots enuff? no foo-foo drinks; just naked Espresso
Tactical Espresso Service http://home.comcast.net/~espressocamp/
Field Artillery Tractor
FOGBANK, GOD OF HELLFIRE
BLACK ROCK f/x Trojan Horse,Anubis,2014Temple
burn shit and blow shit up

User avatar
Ranger Genius
Posts: 2408
Joined: Thu Mar 25, 2004 7:07 am
Location: Behind the Zion Curtain
Contact:

Post by Ranger Genius » Thu Mar 30, 2006 6:08 pm

That's a fantastic example of a poorly-thought-out URL. Kinda like
http://www.expertsexchange.com
“We cross our bridges when we come to them and burn them behind us, with nothing to show for our progress except a memory of the smell of smoke, and a presumption that once our eyes watered.”

User avatar
Desert Duck
Posts: 2029
Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2004 10:53 pm
Location: Oregon foothills near Silver Falls...wait, no...San Francisco...umm North bay?...The Playa!!!!

Post by Desert Duck » Thu Mar 30, 2006 6:14 pm

Nope, they've got sex chane info on that site.
I like pudding.

I like tea.

I like chocolate.

Do you like me?

User avatar
tisha2
Posts: 2570
Joined: Tue Jun 08, 2004 4:44 pm
Location: Blue Lake, CA
Contact:

Post by tisha2 » Thu Mar 30, 2006 8:22 pm

at work we have little cubbyhole mailboxes, so at meetings if i need something in non-digital form i get to say:

"Put a hardcopy in my box."

with a straight face.

i love that. :twisted:
ERP ~ Emergency Resource Procurement
"if i can't find it, yer f***ed"
https://www.facebook.com/pages/ERP-Emergency-Resource-Procurement/257100377734118

how we roll:
https://www.facebook.com/TheThugboat

User avatar
The CO
Posts: 1670
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 10:56 am
Burning Since: 1996
Camp Name: M*A*S*H 4207th/404://Village Not Found
Location: I-CORPS, M*A*S*H HQ, Van Nuts, CA

Post by The CO » Thu Mar 30, 2006 9:37 pm

"Put the shackles on the right way or I'll make you wear that bridle."
-Me at work one day.
M*A*S*H 4207th: An army of fun.
I don't care what the borg says: feather-wearers will NOT be served in Rosie's Bar.
When I ask how many burns, I mean at BRC.

User avatar
BigCock
Posts: 2249
Joined: Wed Sep 08, 2004 3:08 pm
Location: in yer pants

Post by BigCock » Thu Mar 30, 2006 9:43 pm

software for your hardrive

User avatar
diane o'thirst
Posts: 2092
Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2003 5:04 pm
Location: Eugene, OR
Contact:

Post by diane o'thirst » Fri Mar 31, 2006 12:24 am

Just listen in on a dressage schooling session. You'll get more double-entendres than you can shake a stick at.

"He's being a pig! Get his head up!" being one...
[url=http://tinyurl.com/245sagf][img]http://tinyurl.com/2bbr28j/.gif[/img][/url][url=http://tinyurl.com/23753ws][img]http://tinyurl.com/2auqebj/.gif[/img][/url][url=http://tinyurl.com/m4y82q][img]http://tinyurl.com/l56rdn/.gif[/img][/url]

User avatar
RingO'Fire
Posts: 978
Joined: Mon Mar 01, 2004 3:00 am
Location: Chattanooga

Post by RingO'Fire » Fri Mar 31, 2006 6:54 am

This is a picture I took at a plant sale at the Atlanta Botanical Gardens.

Image

Of course I didn't think of this until much later...

[approaching sales clerk]"Excuse me, m'am. Yes, I'd like to get a woodie and was wondering if you could help me with that?"
...but it seemed like such a good idea at the time...

User avatar
theCryptofishist
Posts: 40313
Joined: Mon Feb 23, 2004 9:28 am
Burning Since: 2017
Location: In Exile

Post by theCryptofishist » Fri Mar 31, 2006 9:28 am

Zoom
we have some nice ruby reds here in florida
The Lady with a Lamprey

"The powerful are exploiting people, art and ideas, and this leads to us plebes debating how to best ration ice.
Man, no wonder they always win....." Lonesomebri

User avatar
BigCock
Posts: 2249
Joined: Wed Sep 08, 2004 3:08 pm
Location: in yer pants

Post by BigCock » Fri Mar 31, 2006 1:58 pm

sputnik wrote:Boy do I need some fresh fruit ...

User avatar
Lassen Forge
Posts: 5320
Joined: Tue Feb 22, 2005 9:35 pm
Location: Where it's always... Wednesday. Don't lose your head over it.

Post by Lassen Forge » Fri Mar 31, 2006 2:53 pm

My first job on the bridge was on the Steel Erection Crew... :roll:

bb

User avatar
AntiM
Moderator
Posts: 20227
Joined: Wed Mar 24, 2004 5:23 am
Burning Since: 2001
Camp Name: Anti M's Home for Wayward Art
Location: Wild, Wild West
Contact:

Post by AntiM » Fri Mar 31, 2006 3:06 pm

My friends attending navy nuke school were studying Heat Transfer and Fluid Flow.

robotland
Posts: 3778
Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2003 8:29 am
Location: Kalamazoo

Post by robotland » Fri Mar 31, 2006 4:46 pm

Jury's still out on "clothe the 5 minutes after skeleton"....


It's more NAUGHTY than DIRTY, but...."Void Where Prohibited" always seemed to me to mean Pooping In An Inappropriate place.

Or...."Passive Solar". *Snort* Like the SUN can be on the BOTTOM. *Duh!*
Howdy From Kalamazoo

User avatar
Desert Duck
Posts: 2029
Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2004 10:53 pm
Location: Oregon foothills near Silver Falls...wait, no...San Francisco...umm North bay?...The Playa!!!!

Post by Desert Duck » Fri Mar 31, 2006 4:49 pm

Carpet Cleaner?
I like pudding.

I like tea.

I like chocolate.

Do you like me?

Cabanasprings
Posts: 365
Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2005 11:18 am

Post by Cabanasprings » Fri Mar 31, 2006 5:08 pm

I played this 20 questions game last weekend where this magic eightball like thing asks the questions and then guesses what you are thinking.

One of the questions was:

Does it come in a box?

User avatar
Lassen Forge
Posts: 5320
Joined: Tue Feb 22, 2005 9:35 pm
Location: Where it's always... Wednesday. Don't lose your head over it.

Post by Lassen Forge » Fri Mar 31, 2006 6:51 pm

Colonel Sanders comes in buckets. And if you're from the mid-south, you know Krystal comes in the sack...


And while we're talking about people, how about that kid... Beaver Cleaver?

bb

User avatar
Desert Duck
Posts: 2029
Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2004 10:53 pm
Location: Oregon foothills near Silver Falls...wait, no...San Francisco...umm North bay?...The Playa!!!!

Post by Desert Duck » Fri Mar 31, 2006 7:30 pm

"Ward, I think you were a little hard on the Beaver last night"

Love it.
I like pudding.

I like tea.

I like chocolate.

Do you like me?

User avatar
robbidobbs
Posts: 2825
Joined: Fri Sep 05, 2003 1:07 pm
Burning Since: 1999
Camp Name: Pottie Central
Location: LOS of the Pottie doors

Post by robbidobbs » Sat Apr 01, 2006 11:38 pm

Question: What is a four letter word for intercourse?
Answer...













(wait for it...)







Talk

User avatar
Ugly Dougly
Posts: 17499
Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2003 9:31 am
Burning Since: 1996
Location: เชียงใหม่

Post by Ugly Dougly » Sun Apr 02, 2006 4:33 pm

"Squaw got nine inches overnight."

User avatar
robbidobbs
Posts: 2825
Joined: Fri Sep 05, 2003 1:07 pm
Burning Since: 1999
Camp Name: Pottie Central
Location: LOS of the Pottie doors

Post by robbidobbs » Fri Apr 07, 2006 10:38 am

(This really happend at work: tech support)

Tech Support Rep tells the customer to "Press the red button."
Customer replies: "Without taking it to dinner first?"

User avatar
tisha2
Posts: 2570
Joined: Tue Jun 08, 2004 4:44 pm
Location: Blue Lake, CA
Contact:

Post by tisha2 » Fri Apr 07, 2006 12:43 pm

AntiM wrote:My trim is plain old boring white.
ERP ~ Emergency Resource Procurement
"if i can't find it, yer f***ed"
https://www.facebook.com/pages/ERP-Emergency-Resource-Procurement/257100377734118

how we roll:
https://www.facebook.com/TheThugboat

User avatar
Atar
Posts: 155
Joined: Wed Dec 28, 2005 12:14 pm
Location: Holland

Post by Atar » Fri Apr 07, 2006 1:32 pm

"Animal Planet.... It grabs you."

"Flair... takes you, every week." (Flair is a womens magazine, and this is an actual comercial on Dutch radio)

On the Dutch Nokia's you'll get the following message when trying to unlock it: "Press * to unlock"
I dunno if this is true for the US, but a bunghole is sometimes refered to as a star in the Netherlands. :twisted:

edit: Also, whenever someone speaks about themselves as "being part of a whole" I crack myself up silently :mrgreen:
Burning with inspiration! [size=134])'([/size]

User avatar
Lorgasm
Posts: 2233
Joined: Tue Sep 02, 2003 4:44 pm
Location: to be announced

Post by Lorgasm » Mon Apr 10, 2006 10:11 am

"tongue thruster"

My dentist called me this when I was 10. Looking back on it, I wonder if I should add this on my resume for future use.

That reminds me of another word:
Oral Fixation.

My sister said I had this when I was addicted to sugarless gum.

cheers,
Lorgasm

So, I'm a tongue thruster with an oral fixation. Who's the lucky girl.....
BOOBIES!!!

User avatar
AntiM
Moderator
Posts: 20227
Joined: Wed Mar 24, 2004 5:23 am
Burning Since: 2001
Camp Name: Anti M's Home for Wayward Art
Location: Wild, Wild West
Contact:

Post by AntiM » Mon Apr 10, 2006 10:19 am

There was a deli in Chicago (long ago) that served up a yummy alcoholic chocolate shake called Oral Fixation. My friend just about dropped off her chair when I asked the very cute waiter, "I'd like an Oral Fixation with whipped cream on top, please."

Can't reacl what was in the drink, but damn it was good.

User avatar
Lorgasm
Posts: 2233
Joined: Tue Sep 02, 2003 4:44 pm
Location: to be announced

Post by Lorgasm » Mon Apr 10, 2006 11:01 am

"lock box" Al Gore
BOOBIES!!!

User avatar
Chai Guy
Posts: 1818
Joined: Wed Sep 03, 2003 1:37 am
Location: Los Angeles
Contact:

Post by Chai Guy » Mon Apr 10, 2006 11:15 am

Image

User avatar
Davoid
Posts: 238
Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2005 12:34 am
Location: Los Angeles
Contact:

Post by Davoid » Mon Apr 10, 2006 11:54 am

Image

Melissa Marcus, Miss Kumquat Festival 2005

Post Reply

Return to “Open Discussion”