your stupid joke here

All things outside of Burning Man.
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Consequences
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Re: your stupid joke here

Post by Consequences » Thu May 09, 2019 10:31 pm

deadbabiesthatsalwaysawinnerright.png
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It like turning ketchup into mustard over here.
Dr. G :coffee:

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Simon of the Playa
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Re: your stupid joke here

Post by Simon of the Playa » Tue Aug 13, 2019 7:15 am

30470384-FC80-4169-9236-11A7C28E7242.jpeg
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Frida Be You & Me

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FIGJAM
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Re: your stupid joke here

Post by FIGJAM » Tue Aug 13, 2019 8:50 am

"Fortune favors the bold" is a mistranslated old dragon saying.

They started it and laugh at it all the time.

The true saying is "Fortune FLAVORS the bold.

They like the crunchy bits! 8)
"Don't buy ur Burn...........Build ur Burn!"

"If I can't find an answer, I'll create one!!!"

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Token
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Re: your stupid joke here

Post by Token » Tue Aug 13, 2019 10:47 am

Oooh, dragons ...

“No scale, no horns, no claws, no fangs ...

... just soft n pink”

Old Dragon proverb.

;)

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Yasarn
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Re: your stupid joke here

Post by Yasarn » Thu Aug 22, 2019 9:03 pm

A man seeking to join a south Texas sheriffs dept. is being interviewed.

The Sergeant doing the interview says, "Your qualifications all look good, but there is an attitude suitability test that you must take before you can be accepted." Then, sliding a service pistol across the desk, he says, "Take this pistol and go out and shoot six illegal aliens, six meth dealers, six Muslim extremists and a rabbit."

"Why the rabbit?"

"That's the attitude we want," says the Sergeant. "When can you start?"

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Yasarn
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Re: your stupid joke here

Post by Yasarn » Thu Aug 22, 2019 9:04 pm

A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need of his good time being spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went.

The wife, after sleeping soundly for one hour, awakened without pain, and as it was still early, she decided to go to the party. In as much as her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him.

She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice chick he could, and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there. His wife sidled up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new stuff that had just arrived.

She let him go as far as he wished; naturally, since he was her husband. Finally he whispered a little proposition in her
ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had a little bang.

Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home and put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behavior.

She was sitting up reading when he came in and asked what kind of a time he had. He said, "Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there."

Then she asked, "Did you dance much?"

He replied, "I'll tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening. But I'll tell you... the guy I loaned my costume to sure had a real good time!"
Last edited by Yasarn on Thu Aug 22, 2019 9:07 pm, edited 3 times in total.

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Yasarn
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Re: your stupid joke here

Post by Yasarn » Thu Aug 22, 2019 9:04 pm

A blonde is on a plane headed toward Toronto. During the flight she decides to get up from her coach seat and sits in first class. The stewardess approaches and says " Im sorry maam but these seats are reserved for first class patrons, you'll have to return to your seat" ..the blonde simply says, "Im blonde , Im beautiful, and Im headed to Toronto".

The stewardess tells the co-pilot. The co-pilot approaches the woman and says," Maam, this section is for first class only. Please go back your seat now" The blonde simply says," Im blonde, Im beautiful, and im headed to Toronto".

Finally the head pilot tells the co-pilot and stewardess. "My wife is a blonde, I speak their language, I'll handle this."

The pilot whispers something in the blondes ear, and she says.."oh my God, Im sorry and thank you!"

The co-pilot and stewardess ask what did he tell this woman to change her mind???

The pilot said...'"I just told her first class isn't going to Toronto!!!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------

A blonde locks her keys in her car. As she tries to open the door with a hanger, a man approaches and says "do you need help?"

As he looks into the car, he approaches the other side and opens the passenger door and says "Miss, this doors open!!"

The blonde says...."Duh, I already got that one!!!!!!!!!!"

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tatonka
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Re: your stupid joke here

Post by tatonka » Tue Oct 22, 2019 8:42 pm

how much are dead battery's worth
they are free of charge
Tales told
Of battles won
Of things we've done
Caligula would grin

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FIGJAM
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Re: your stupid joke here

Post by FIGJAM » Sun Nov 03, 2019 4:52 pm

Ducks are just all terrain chickens!!!
"Don't buy ur Burn...........Build ur Burn!"

"If I can't find an answer, I'll create one!!!"

Fuck Im Good Just Ask Me

Meat Hunter
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Re: your stupid joke here

Post by Meat Hunter » Mon Nov 04, 2019 8:30 pm

I was in my local Ace Hardware store today and I happened to meet the owner as we were both walking down the plumbing fitting isle.

I ask him, "How many folks do you have working here now?"

To which he replied, "About half of them."
Specializing in Calibrating Windsocks -- Any where, Any Time, and Any elevation.

Vidi ego exars.

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Canoe
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Re: your stupid joke here

Post by Canoe » Sun Nov 10, 2019 8:22 am

Headlong wrote:I used to have a budgie who always became very vocal whenever I put the music from The Rocky Horror Picture Show on. Never knew if he liked it or was protesting...
At any rate, he felt very strongly about it
Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
.
... but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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tatonka
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Re: your stupid joke here

Post by tatonka » Mon Nov 25, 2019 7:50 pm

Is buttcheeks one word? or should I spread them apart ?
Tales told
Of battles won
Of things we've done
Caligula would grin

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Canoe
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Re: your stupid joke here

Post by Canoe » Tue Nov 26, 2019 8:20 pm

Youtube thumbnail: clickbait or deterrent?
.
Clickbait or deterrent.png
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
.
... but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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