your stupid joke here

[Canoe]

I was there at night and this guy comes up pulls up his sleeve and he is wearing like 5 high end watches and offers to sell me a 600 dollar Bulova watch for 130 dollars. That's not that high end but way more than i would spend on something i never wear. I tell him no and he drops the price to 90$. I say no again and he gets upset telling me im crazy for passing up a deal like that as he knows that its a 600$ watch because he stole it from that shop over there and he points to a shop that is about 30 meters away.

[DoctorIknow]

I was there at night and this guy comes up pulls up his sleeve and he is wearing like 5 high end watches and offers to sell me a 600 dollar Bulova watch for 130 dollars. That's not that high end but way more than i would spend on something i never wear. I tell him no and he drops the price to 90$. I say no again and he gets upset telling me im crazy for passing up a deal like that as he knows that its a 600$ watch because he stole it from that shop over there and he points to a shop that is about 30 meters away.

I was an "Ordinary Seaman," 19yr.old, on a merchant ship, and at a port somewhere, some guy came crawling out of the hold and opened his jacket which had watches hanging on it...just like in the movies. There was a beautiful Bulova, and I bargained him down (as if!). Took it to my cabin and admired it. Turned it over and the back was really cheap steel. Held it to my ear and the tic tic sounded like a tin can rolling slowly down a hill. Looked at the front and it was a Boliva, not a Bulova. Opened the porthole and tossed it, pissed of at myself but knowing right away it was a very cheap lesson that would serve me well in the future...

[Canoe]

Guy nearly died...

Split in different countries due to COVID-19, a guy reports his girlfriend had her 35th birthday without them together. She decided to go out to a recently re-opened bar/restaurant and ordered a glass of wine. Sipping the wine in the evening breeze, she mentions to the waiter that it's her birthday. He appeared to think she was hoping for a discount on the somewhat expensive wine, and said "We'll top you up a few times". Then he winked at her when he said, "Besides, you don't look a day over 35."

[Simon of the Playa]

mike is a fucking joke.

and it’s not even funny.

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[FIGJAM]

Lately when I go out for supply's, wearing my mask, if I get any greeting, I cheerfully reply loud enough to hear "maw fwa na boo ray".

So far it gets a laugh every time.

[Simon of the Playa]

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[Simon of the Playa]

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[lucky420]

^^^ yep biggest joke ever

[Simon of the Playa]

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[Popeye]

Don't open an email with the title "Knock Knock".

It's a Jehovahs Witness working from home.

[Miura-7]

As the presidential physician walked toward the podium carrying a gallon of bleach. He cleared his throat, and said. "He didn't make it."

[Canoe]

Officer 'Bubba' Bobby - Voted best officer for roaming backup car.
.

Officer 'Bubba' Bobby - voted best officer for roaming backup car.jpg

[Canoe]

Note to self:
When using a new technology paint remover on car parts, trying that out in the bathtub to catch drips makes sense - if the bathtub hadn't been refinished by spray-painting.