Aorry for th long quote, but I didn't want to edit it.
SED wrote: joel the ornery wrote:
SED wrote:What if there were a general move toward civility, such as refraining from labeling people as 'fuck wits' and so on?
The best way to encourage positive behavior is by example.
But what if people really are being "fuck wits," pencil dicks, whistle dicks and other assorted carnival attractions?
Well, that's just the issue. One person's fuck wit is another's champion of free expression.
I suppose the ePlaya doesn't need to reflect the values of BRC, and maybe that's why it exists--to give the cranky moralists their own space.
I don't need to like what people post to appreciate the freedom they exercise when they do it, just like I don't need to like the way a person's nude body looks in order to enjoy the fact that she or he feels free to expose it.
There seems to be a common definition for a Troll, which I know because I've been one at times, and regretted it. though I haven't apologized. I'll do that now. I'm sorry. But who gets to define what a fuck wit is?
IMO, everyone deserves compassion, even the most vile among us. Maybe fuck wits need even more, so they'll have a positive incentive to evolve, rather than the threat of being flamed or shunned. Why is it that we all seem to like Alice so much anyway? I think it's because she's never posted a nasty word about anyone. She just pours on love, as if she were the incoming tide.
Lastly, flaming and shunning are ineffective means for dealing with negative elements. We've been shunning and flaming Iraq's militarists for some time now, and where has it gotten us? Any 'fuck wit' or troll can instantly switch identity on the ePlaya, and continue to transgress and offend without consequence.
My apologies if this has a moralistic tone. I will appreciate constructive feed back. As a matter of conscience and commitment, I will also refrain from stalking and antagonizing anyone who flames me.
Wow, this is the best example of what I've wanted to say on a couple of occasions. My hat is off to you sed.
The thing about fuckwit, and whistle dick for me is they don't communicate anything other then I don't like you. They say nothing about the behavior that you feel was inappropriate.
I was related an experience where someone had an uncomfortable interaction with someone and saw them the next year, and just yelled out at them, "hey it's the creepy guy!", leaving him bewildered as to why he'd been attacked. That kind of stuff just grows self-hatred and anger and fear and resentment. It won't keep the guy from doing again whatever he did that made the person uncomfortable. It might even re-inforce the behavior, because in his confused state, he can at least rely on the fact that what he did last year didn't provoke that kind of reaction.
I'll apologize for trolling also with my please flame me thread, I didn't realize how a post like that took away from the experience for many.
I'll apologize for my problem with the affirmation thread too. I was wrong about what people were getting out of it, which was a lot of good laughs. But I'm glad I brought it up, so I could learn.
I do think there are some areas that should be done a certain way (sexual violence verses violent sex, IMO), and we all have our opinions on stuff like that, and I think its better to express them and express when we disagree with others, then just turn the thing into an unusable mess by letting hidden angers and side-directed comments rule how we respond.
I'm still having a hard time figuring out what is trolling and what is just an attempt at humor. I actually edited this post because I described my hat as "(budweiser double can with straws)", and I thought that might be trolling. I'd ask for some help with that, but I'm going to go away from the eplaya for a while. I'm realizing I'm neglecting my own local community for this one, and so I'm going to go away for a while and work on that. I'll miss you, and I'll be back.