tell me a story

[ygmir]

Hi all,
so, in the Bar2 last night, a patron asked for a "bedtime story", it got started, and, seems like it might be fun.
But, seems it needs it's own thread, so, I thought I'd start it here.
I'll post below, the story so far, and, those who contributed.

seems contributions could be as long or short as wanted.



ygmir
PostPosted: Thu Feb 18, 2010 10:18 pm Post subject:
well, I'll start, maybe we can tell a group story:

Once upon a time, on a playa, far, far away, lived a..........


lonestoner916
PostPosted: Thu Feb 18, 2010 10:35 pm Post subject:
Magical dust fairy with a drinking problem. He was only visible to Burners suffering severe dehydration and psilocybin overdoses.

ragabashpup
PostPosted: Thu Feb 18, 2010 10:39 pm Post subject:
But even though he had a drinking problem he was the happiest fairy you would ever want to meet. He would sprinkle playa dust...

ygmir
PostPosted: Thu Feb 18, 2010 10:48 pm Post subject:
on campers and offer happy cigarettes to those who.........

lonestoner916
PostPosted: Thu Feb 18, 2010 10:50 pm Post subject:
Put MOOP in other people's art. The "happy cigarettes" caused immediate psychosis. Also, he sprinkled a small pinch of dust into the ass cracks of unsuspecting geriatric shirt cockers with wrinkly old balls. And into the gourmet meals of super rich snobs too stuck up to get out of their RV and share their lobsters with the poor hippie kid in his coleman tent who was camping right next to them. One day, the fairy was making his rounds, sprinkling the dust hither and yon, when...

ygmir
PostPosted: Thu Feb 18, 2010 10:55 pm Post subject:
he was accosted by a rat, a big f$%$ ing rat, with a #$*$* this long!! *holds hands two feet apart*

well,
after fending off said rat, with his..............

ragabashpup
PostPosted: Thu Feb 18, 2010 10:57 pm Post subject:
with his playa pixie tu tu tuesday power! (he had his sparkly pink tu-tu on)

[pinemom]

He Jumped on a 20 foot long Banana Mutant vehicle with Monkeys swinging everywhere....

[ygmir]

and, since the monkey had eaten nothing but roses, they were slinging their "sweet smelling Poo wink" at all the passersby, and, singing.........

[mdmf007]

Irish drinking songs that were boisterous and...

[Fire_Moose]

...obnoxious. Eventually 6 DPW members got so pissed off that they went after the said monkeys and hanged them in center camp for all to see their art.

[littleflower]

unfortunately for the DPW, they did not get all of the monkeys... and little ju ju immediately started plotting his revenge....

[goathead]

little ju ju thought I will get them while they sleep

but then realize DPW never sleeps.

[Fire_Moose]

So little Ju Ju put on all his leather costuming he brought to the burn and headed over to the ghetto...

[Sail Man]

Where he picked up a very large black hooker named Mo Nasty

[goathead]

And they all headed to center camp, to teach the hippies the Hokey Pokey

[ygmir]

along the way, they picked up a cadre of playa denizens, collectively known as........

[pinemom]

The poop group, they all were dressed in brown stinky paper bags with....

[Fire_Moose]

pudding (?) running down them....

[ragabashpup]

when the group of hippie stoners saw the pudding dripping poop bags they just HAD to follow them..

[Just_Joe]

...but within minutes, forgot who they were chasing and why.

As they were pondering what to do next, they realized that they had a tremendous case of the munchies. Luckily for them they then stumbled into...

[ygmir]

a group of small vendors, selling Oscar Meyer Wieners, all chanting in Gregorian style, claiming to be "of the body" and looking for a fellow named "Landru".........they played this commercial all the while:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aNddW2xmZp8[/youtube]

and whenever someone would approach them asking for a wiener..............

[ragabashpup]

they would tell them to kneel down open their mouth and close their eyes..you will be in for a big suprise...

[curiousgnate]

for Mo Nasty was not just a whore Mo Nasty was not a woman not a man, but a fantabulous hermaphrodite! and he she it held the secret to

[lonestoner916]

Sexual freedom in the desert! She taught a hard lesson to both the DPW and the stoner followers, and then he/she happened to run into Larry Harvey at Center Camp and...

[ragabashpup]

He invited him/her to come and hear the real story behind burning man which was..

[Elorrum]

etched on a tiny stone tablet, hidden in the smallest of a set of gilded nesting russian dolls, all residing in a 4" thick steel safe. The process of revealing the answer took several hours, longer when mind altering drugs were involved, but then it was a lot more fun. The carved message read, "Mums the word." but...

[ygmir]

in reality, "the word" was ..................

[goathead]

Rhyddid

[ygmir]

and so, they saddled the alpacas and rhydid them out of there..........all the way to.............

[Elorrum]

Wales, where Larry had at the very least learned the word for freedom, and although it was just a magical journey, they added a new word to the Burning Man lexicon. So with the dolls repacked, and safe re-locked, they wondered what good the answer was when what they really were searching for was a way to bacon infuse an entire...

[ygmir]

the question was posed.........by a faery princess............
but, truth be told, their destination was so far removed from Wales..........
it was to an exotic land, a land of milk and honey, the land of ..........
Rochester..............wherein they encountered a denizen............who used the moniker:

[Elorrum]

who used many monikers...

[ygmir]

and many personages............a person of many, and not, identities..........
a secretive, yet, highly visible person..........of intellect and wit.........

[goathead]

But where is this man of many words and misery, for those who snark in his path?

[Sail Man]

For he is on his throne, caressing his sword of justice. Come, he harkens! Come, Come! Show me thine seed of righteousness! And Lo, it came to pass, upon his vestment. And it was good.