Just an idea.

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lucky.bastard
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Post by lucky.bastard » Fri Jun 03, 2011 5:54 pm

Roger Dodger wrote:
FaeTora wrote:[quote="Roger Dodger

First I am probably taller than you, so to me, you are a little girl. Or is that picture of a not so endowed boy that you chose to reflect you? *Sigh* Luckily breath is free as I am. My worth is not defined by a breath-o-lizer.

.
the sexy belly in question belongs to FaeTora
"In cultivating my own personal sojourn of enlightenment, I've had to forego employment opportunities "

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neopunk
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Re: Just an idea.

Post by neopunk » Sun Jul 03, 2011 10:36 pm

So I know I'm a little late in the convo, but for people that have "burningman burnout", I would like for burners to know...when a person has a partner, and ALL that partner talks about is BM, it makes it hard to get to know the real person said partner is. It becomes something to hide behind, instead of sharing real feelings and experiances, because your partner's heart is not here and close, but proclaimed to be in a desert, far away. The place you are for 51 weeks of the year is somehow claimed unworthy of a fraction of the love, devotion and attention that BM has. To the point burners call this camping event "home". It in effect becomes "the other woman" because instead of consentrating on ur family and sharing your heart, BM gets thrown up as a screen or an escape. This causes resentment for people who live in the "default" world. Even labeling real life is an escapist attitude for people who cannot appreciate the life they have outside of the BM event. Its hard to have a high opinion of a person with such an escapist attitude, when all that was wanted was an equal share of that devotion in our home. That's how come people come to be resentful of bm. and even with this attitude I still paid for 1/2 the cost of his "man" tatoo, and created this profile because even thou we broke up, I still love to see him express love for something he cares about. Even if it can't be me and not to talk shit. But because this was something we bonded over and it will always be in my <3.

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Re: Just an idea.

Post by Elderberry » Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:57 am

Interesting take.
JK
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gyre
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Re: Just an idea.

Post by gyre » Mon Jul 04, 2011 7:37 am

neopunk wrote:So I know I'm a little late in the convo, but for people that have "burningman burnout", I would like for burners to know...when a person has a partner, and ALL that partner talks about is BM, it makes it hard to get to know the real person said partner is. It becomes something to hide behind, instead of sharing real feelings and experiences, because your partner's heart is not here and close, but proclaimed to be in a desert, far away. The place you are for 51 weeks of the year is somehow claimed unworthy of a fraction of the love, devotion and attention that BM has. To the point burners call this camping event "home". It in effect becomes "the other woman" because instead of concentrating on your family and sharing your heart, BM gets thrown up as a screen or an escape. This causes resentment for people who live in the "default" world. Even labeling real life is an escapist attitude for people who cannot appreciate the life they have outside of the BM event. Its hard to have a high opinion of a person with such an escapist attitude, when all that was wanted was an equal share of that devotion in our home. That's how come people come to be resentful of bm. and even with this attitude I still paid for 1/2 the cost of his "man" tattoo, and created this profile because even thou we broke up, I still love to see him express love for something he cares about. Even if it can't be me and not to talk shit. But because this was something we bonded over and it will always be in my <3.
Neo, I can't speak for anyone else, but I have had similar experiences with other social groups.
It is quite easy to get wrapped up in something interesting and time consuming, but it doesn't necessarily mean a lack of interest in anything else.

I have far too many interests to be content in one group, but I have found myself doing this in the past.
It can be unrelated to any relationship issues.
It is a big mistake to become so focused, for many reasons.

It is simple reality that I am curious about too many things, enjoy too many different types of people, want to read too many books, to ever have time to do everything I would like to do.
What I enjoy in particular about burners is that, contrary to what you may hear, there is no specific burner type, that I can delineate clearly anyway.
But I would never be content knowing only burners.

Diversity is life, after racing of course.

Neo, I suggest you may have simply been caught in the crunch of his enthusiasm, or it's possible he hadn't learned to manage his time well enough.
Or you may just have had relationship issues that hadn't been worked through yet, on either side.
I think it doesn't indicate a lack of interest though.

There is a different burning man out there for everyone, and I mean on the playa.
Perhaps you should come out and find yours?

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neopunk
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Re: Just an idea.

Post by neopunk » Mon Jul 04, 2011 10:02 am

On this thread, ppl were questioning why some people dislike bm. So I felt the need to express why that had happened to me. I tried to embrace it. I went to bm. But it was nothing like he said it be. The heat was tough and the vastness. Also, my partner at the time, couldn't relax. It was very strange. He was constantly riding me about my behavior. See, I got the impression, I was going to have this imaginary freedom to be and do what I wanted. Turns out, he was preoccupied with keeping me from interacting with anyone but him. Very stressful. It was a reflection on our relationship, for sure. I'm sure he will blast me, for sharing my heart. All I wanted was to go, maybe do a little e and listen to music. He as all about making 'friends' but at the same time not willing to share those friends with me, instead making me feel like I didn't deserve to meet those people, because those were his. Like I was trying to take from him. I am still very, very scarred from the experiance.
He even went as far as to say I couldn't camp with him, if I came again, because no one in his group would accept me. This is not an attack in any way, again it is honest and my experiance. I'm sure this will upset him. The funny thing is, the reason it will upset him is because its honest. He will say I'm trying to talk bad about him, or that I am emotionally irresponcible, because I am talking about how I feel.

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gyre
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Re: Just an idea.

Post by gyre » Mon Jul 04, 2011 10:29 am

I'm sorry you had such a bad time.

I can't really imagine trying to pace myself with other people the whole time, no matter how genial.

I hope you can do it for yourself some time, your way.
Even that can be different every time.

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neopunk
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Re: Just an idea.

Post by neopunk » Mon Jul 04, 2011 11:15 am

Thankyou, so much for your compassion and understanding. It is very healing to vent this past anger and fustration. Sometimes having some one say "I'm sorry that made you feel that way" can ease a painful experiance by miles! I knew this was the right time to sort these feelings out...the universe provides and I am slowly letting go. This will be my first september I am not waiting for "my burner" to come home in 4 years. But I have learned a lot. and I know what it is like to drink champagne under the man and tell a stranger about falling in love, with someone very special. It was perfect at the time, and even when he fustrated me, I loved him more than my own breath. As for going back to the desert, really I'm a festival chick. All I need is music and some company, grass for my blanket and my hula hoop. I don't do well in the heat or high elevation. But High Sierra is a great experience and when everyday feels like Christmas, it really truely doesn't matter where you are. Cause I'm one of the lucky people who are "home" 52 weeks a year. :)

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goathead
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Re: Just an idea.

Post by goathead » Mon Jul 04, 2011 11:38 am

neo
Sounds like most of your problems where really his problems.
I can understand the desert not being for everyone though.
You love the green grass, music.
I love dust fire and flames.
No big deal.

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neopunk
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Re: Just an idea.

Post by neopunk » Mon Jul 04, 2011 12:00 pm

I applaud anyone who can deal with that kinda heat and elevation. It was too much for this flatlander! And I really don't think he has that many problems...I'm just not a fan of the "public" face. I'm allergic to b.s and trying to impress people. I'm not in jr. High. This is me and I'm not going to filter it or be ashamed of who god made me!

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Re: Just an idea.

Post by goathead » Mon Jul 04, 2011 12:28 pm

neopunk wrote:I applaud anyone who can deal with that kinda heat and elevation. It was too much for this flatlander! And I really don't think he has that many problems...I'm just not a fan of the "public" face. I'm allergic to b.s and trying to impress people. I'm not in jr. High. This is me and I'm not going to filter it or be ashamed of who god made me!
Like I said, his problems.
:)
I do kind of wonder why you are here though?

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neopunk
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Re: Just an idea.

Post by neopunk » Mon Jul 04, 2011 12:55 pm

I was browsing posts and saw one regarding people who "hate" Burning Man and am defending those who have had a negative experiance, by sharing what happened wth me and my burner. Also, I needed to get some stuff off my chest and this seemed like a good place.

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Re: Just an idea.

Post by goathead » Mon Jul 04, 2011 1:15 pm

Hmmmmm......
But for myself I am no big fan of lets say NASCAR for example.
I have never visited a site for NASCAR fans, doubt if I ever do.
So your not a fan of BM, so why are you here?

My sweetie has a couple of interests that she enjoys, but I am not interested in, I have never visited those sites.
You mentioned enjoying festivals, hooping, why are you not there sharing the things you enjoy?

But then again we can grow on some people, your welcome to stay if you like.
:)
know a few the desert doesn't agree with here.

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neopunk
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Re: Just an idea.

Post by neopunk » Mon Jul 04, 2011 1:57 pm

If you read the thread, as I said before I was responding to someone questioning why people dislike burningman. I am a burner, or was, and happened apon this discussion. I had someone invite me to come an enjoy bm alone, and then was explaining why the desert actually didn't agree with me. Just because you are allergic to dairy, doesn't mean icecream doesn't sound good...its just not something my body agrees with (the desert) but this isn't the desert. Its a forum where I can talk to ppl, hopefully make friends, and express my ideas...idk of too many places like that.

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Re: Just an idea.

Post by goathead » Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:08 pm

Enjoy the stay then.
Watch out for the snark.
:lol:

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Re: Just an idea.

Post by Bob » Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:15 pm

There's an Owl in My Room

I saw Gertrude Stein on the screen of a newsreel theater one afternoon and I heard her read that famous passage of hers about pigeons on the grass, alas (the sorrow is, as you know, Miss Stein's). After reading about the pigeons on the grass alas, Miss Stein said, "This is a simple description of a landscape I have seen many times." I don't really believe that that is true. Pigeons on the grass alas may be a simple description of Miss Stein's own consciousness, but it is not a simple description of a plot of grass on which pigeons have alighted, are alighting, or are going to alight. A truly simple description of the pigeons alighting on the grass of the Luxembourg Gardens (which, I believe, is where the pigeons alighted) would say of the pigeons alighting there only that they were pigeons alighting. Pigeons that alight anywhere are neither sad pigeons nor gay pigeons, they are simply pigeons.

It is neither just nor accurate to connect the word alas with pigeons. Pigeons are definitely not alas. They have nothing to do with alas and they have nothing to do with hooray (not even when you tie red, white, and blue ribbons on them and let them loose at band concerts); they have nothing to do with mercy me or isn't that fine, either. White rabbits, yes, and Scotch terriers, and blue-jays, and even hippopotamuses, but not pigeons. I happen to have studied pigeons very closely and carefully, and I have studied the effect, or rather the lack of effect, of pigeons very carefully. A number of pigeons alight from time to time on the sill of my hotel window when I am eating breakfast and staring out the window. They never alas me, they never make me feel alas; they never make me feel anything.

Nobody and no animal and no other bird can play a scene so far down as a pigeon can. For instance, when a pigeon on my window ledge becomes aware of me sitting there in a chair in my blue polka-dot dressing-gown, worrying, he pokes his head far out from his shoulders and peers sideways at me, for all the world (Miss Stein might surmise) like a timid man peering around the corner of a building trying to ascertain whether he is being followed by some hoofed fiend or only by the echo of his own footsteps. And yet it is not for all the world like a timid man peering around the corner of a building trying to ascertain whether he is being followed by a hoofed fiend or only by the echo of his own footsteps, at all. And that is because there is no emotion in the pigeon and no power to arouse emotion. A pigeon looking is just a pigeon looking. When it comes to emotion, a fish, compared to a pigeon, is practically beside himself.

A pigeon peering at me doesn't make me sad or glad or apprehensive or hopeful. With a horse or a cow or a dog it would be different. It would be especially different with a dog. Some dogs peer at me as if I had just gone completely crazy or as if they had just gone completely crazy. I can go so far as to say that most dogs peer at me that way. This creates in the consciousness of both me and the dog a feeling of alarm or downright terror and legitimately permits me to work into a description of the landscape, in which the dog and myself are figures, a note of emotion. Thus I should not have minded if Miss Stein had written: dogs on the grass, look out, dogs on the grass, look out, look out, dogs on the grass, look out Alice. That would be a simple description of dogs on the grass. But when any writer pretends that a pigeon makes him sad, or makes him anything else, I must instantly protest that this is a highly specialized fantastic impression created in an individual consciousness and that therefore it cannot fairly be presented as a simple description of what actually was to be seen.

People who do not understand pigeons-and pigeons can be understood only when you understand that there is nothing to understand about them-should not go around describing pigeons or the effect of pigeons. Pigeons come closer to a zero of impingement than any other birds. Hens embarrass me the way my old Aunt Hattie used to when I was twelve and she still insisted I wasn't big enough to bathe myself; owls disturb me; if I am with an eagle I always pretend that I am not with an eagle; and so on down to swallows at twilight who scare the hell out of me. But pigeons have absolutely no effect on me. They have absolutely no effect on anybody. They couldn't even startle a child. That is why they are selected from among all birds to be let loose, with colored ribbons attached to them, at band concerts, library dedications, and christenings of new dirigibles. If any body let loose a lot of owls on such an occasion there would be rioting and catcalls and whistling and fainting spells end throwing of chairs and the Lord only knows what else.

From where I am sitting now I can look out the window and see a pigeon being a pigeon on the roof of the Harvard Club. No other thing can be less what it is not than a pigeon can, and Miss Stein, of all people, should understand that simple fact. Behind the pigeon I am looking at, a blank wall of tired gray bricks is stolidly trying to sleep off oblivion; underneath the pigeon the cloistered windows of the Harvard Club are staring in horrified bewilderment at something they have seen across the street. The pigeon is just there on the roof being a pigeon, having been, and being, a pigeon and, what is more, always going to be, too. Nothing could be simpler than that. If you read that sentence aloud you will instantly see what I mean. It is a simple description of a pigeon on a roof. It is only with an effort that I am conscious of the pigeon, but I am acutely aware of a great sulky red iron pipe that is creeping up the side of the building intent on sneaking up on a slightly tipsy chimney which is shouting its head off.

There is nothing a pigeon can do or be that would make me feel sorry for it or for myself or for the people in the world, just as there is nothing I could do or be that would make a pigeon feel sorry for itself. Even if I plucked his feathers out it would not make him feel sorry for himself and it would not make me feel sorry for myself or for him. But try plucking the quills out of a porcupine or even plucking the fur out of a jackrabbit. There is nothing a pigeon could be, or can be, rather, which could get into my consciousness like a fumbling hand in a bureau drawer and disarrange my mind or pull anything out of it. I bar nothing at all. You could dress up a pigeon in a tiny suit of evening clothes and put a tiny silk hat on his head and a tiny gold-headed cane under his wing and send him walking into my room at night. It would make no impression on me. I would not shout, "Good god almighty, the birds are in charge!" But you could send an owl into my room, dressed only in the feathers it was born with, and no monkey business, and I would pull the covers over my head and scream.

No other thing in the world falls so far short of being able to do what it cannot do as a pigeon does. Of being unable to do what it can do, too, as far as that goes.

James Thurber, The New Yorker, 17-Nov-1934
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Re: Just an idea.

Post by goathead » Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:30 pm

spit out the fire elf Bob...

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