I'm a Dead Horse!...Beat Me!

[H.G.Crosby]

[Rice]

I have a conspiracy theory, so I am going to PM people on the list who question what I am saying...

[Simon of the Playa]

Post Your Cute Pictures of happy stuff and we'll all go "Awwwwwwwwwwwwww"...

i'll start...

[Lassen Forge]

Hey, there was a really bitchin' theme camp, I can't remember what they did, or where they were, or their name, or their theme or anything, but I remember the bartender was this guy named Bob, and I want to know if I can camp with you guys, because your camp was totally like cool, and like, I'll bring some "stuff" and you know... Oh when I show up, I probably won't have a tent or water or food or anything, because me and my boyfriend are breaking up on the way to the burn, so you can help me, right? We won't make a scene from the time we get there to the time I go home with one of your campers. We're cool, right? See you there!

[theCryptofishist]

I've never been to the burn, but I know that Larry Harvey sold out for several million dollars and a French dj compound and I want to lead the burn back to it's true roots, even though I don't actually have any leadership potential, and I'm looking for a camp to sponsor me, plus pay for my entourage and several rvs, because I'm going ot bring burningman back to the real spirit of burningman.
Namaste

[Roberto Dobbisano]

IT"S THE JEW'S FAULT!!!

it's ALWAYS the Jew's Fault.

[Lassen Forge]

Like, I know the man is out there and everything, but he won't bust me for bringing out my stash and smokin' fatties out by the man, 'cuz I heard it's mellow out there and the cops and stuff are all cool... I heard there are lots of dealers out there, think I can get hooked up with (name stupid narcotic substance here), right? Like, they don't have undercover cops out there, right, because if I ask someone if they're the fuzz, they have to tell me, because they can't lie, right?

Oh yeah, I heard its so cool I can go into the bars there and get drunk, even tho I'm only 19...

[Ugly Dougly]

Hi, my girlfriend is going to Burning Man, but I have chosen to stay home. Is she going to get involved in some sort of orgy situation that I am probably better off not knowing about?

[Ugly Dougly]

Hi, I'm from Svalbard. Interested in seeing if there is a regional group on Svalbard that I could hook up with.

[some seeing eye]

Feathers! (are treason)
Tickets! (are unfair)
Exodus! (how do I make it faster for me)
PnP Camps! (should be outlawed)
LEOs! (are unfair)
Guns! (are a religion)

"I'm a hot girl, give me a ticket (it's worked for me before)"
"I have a ticket for the right hot girl (hasn't worked for me yet)"
"I bave a baby, can I bring it? Is there someone to take care of it while I'm busy? I'm also looking for a free ticket."
"I'm planning to bring my $5000 bike, $4000 ($40,000) worth of DJ gear and sound equipment and my entire collection of vinyl, my great grandmother's wedding dress and my collection of pearls, my best shoes, my new significant other, my..., how can I protect them from getting lost, stolen or ruined?"
We haven't seen this one in a while: "Can someone give me a ride in/out, in their plane?"

[BBadger]

This thread needs to be recreated with the OP being the first and one-and-only post of a brand new account, complete with begging for a ticket, complaining about scalpers, and providing a wall-of-text ticket solution involving the gate.

[Rice]

Gate is inefficient because RV's have to wait in the same line I do. They search our cars, why is that? How come we cannot wander away from our vehicles while in line? They only have 10 lanes, there should be 20. There should be a gate on the other side of the city, how come they dont have one there too? My Truck/Trailer/Van has is packed to the rafters, how come it takes gate so long to search it??

I should be able to take my 50 foot RV hauling 2 trailers on Jungo road! (My friend, who has a 4X4 with huge wheels had no trouble, so I shouldn't either.) That is totally unfair....

[Bob]

IT"S THE JEW'S FAULT!!!

it's ALWAYS the Jew's Fault.

BTW, I've heard Jew Playa is really cool, but I can't find it on Google Maps.

Is it on July 4th to avoid the high holy days?

What do we wear?

Is it still cool?

[Rice]

How come Burning Man spent $3,000,000 in salaries in 2011 when they only spent $300,000 in 2003?? I could do Burning Man in 4 acres of land, they should do that....

[theCryptofishist]

Why isn't it a wymyn? Everything has to be centered around a male-bodied person, even counterculture.

[junglesmacks]

Hey there, welcome to eplaya!

[Sham]

Will there be naked, old and unattractive people there this year?

[Turtleburp]

Two words; rape culture

[Bob]

I've heard spraying vinegar or lemon juice in your eyes is all you need to do.

[Nipple]

I'm pretty sure my girlfriend is going to sleep with everyone.

How do I make sure that doesn't happen?

Unrelatedly: Where's the best place to meet people and hook up?

[pink]

'manifest'.

[Lassen Forge]

Oh yeah - the theme this year sucks. Last year's was better.

[gyre]

The Ten Principals

Typing REAL BIG

Clip show threads

Fish inna barrel

[Ugly Dougly]

They should ______________________________________
(Use the back of form if you need more space.)

[Dr. Pyro]

I just got done watching "Malcolm In The Middle" on IFC and saw this episode called Burning Man. Turns out it's this thing! So me and my buds who are all 4:20 friendly want to go and meet that shaman chick who fucked Malcolm. The problem is there seems to be a bunch of catcus out there and people keep getting all fucked up by stepping on them. Will all the catcus keep me and my buds from fucking that shaman chick? Hope she likes the best ganga because that's all we party with.

[Roberto Dobbisano]

Do you have tickets?

Would you like to join my Big Theme Camp /Project and be my Bitch?

[Lonesomebri]

Moderators: is there some way I can go back and delete all the crazy shit I've posted?


.....and any info on how those EZ-up shade shelters work?

[CarrieSnarf]

I have anal cancer. My paternal grandfather, who is a 95 year old war vetern, and my 10 year old niece, who both also have anal cancer (apparently it's familial) need to meet on the playa so our souls can merge in to the beautiful dust of home. We will totally help work at your camp when we have time, but not for setup or break down and will bring you the beautiful gift of our dup-step remixes of popular Justin Bieber songs. We didn't really bother to register for tickets. We feel its our playa given right to buy them from a road side hippie in gerlach on day 3 of the event. We don't like these new "rules" and won't take the "man" keeping us down. We will debase ourselves to pay no more than $150 per tickets. You see, I'm 1/18th Cherokee and therefore my soul is very special and needs to recharge in the playa even though my declining medical condition makes the trip both unwise and impractical. I don't think I should pay any camp fees for your camp, because I'm going to make extra spicy vegan indian food for the ENTIRE camp that is gauranteed to give you dystenery. I'm going to drive in to the camp in my 48 foot RV, but it's vintage and I painted a flower on it so I'm totally not like those posers. Due to my sensitive condition I will need to run my generator ever second of the day.

OH and should we take showers? Do you like to shower? Please explain to me the pros and cons of showering. I can't possibly imagine how we could accomplish a shower... I haven't bothered to google the concept, or ask anyone who has camped...ever... nor really even considered pouring water over my head.

Oh, you brought such a big truck. Could you take my bike and this garbage? I really don't need either anymore.

[AntiM]

I think your camp is really cool and want to camp with you, do you provide showers and meals and power? I don't want to pay dues and I can help set up even though I'm arriving days after you do, and I didn't read a thing about your project or bother to find out you're a theme camp of three people, and can you bring a decorated bike and some costumes and I eat raw food, and will your theme camp be giving me a free ticket? Can you get me into your fire conclave? I will volunteer a whole bunch because I won't need to sleep after partying all night.

I'm spamming every theme camp on the list because I know someone will find me charming/feel sorry for me.

[Simon of the Playa]

Do you have tickets?

Would you like to join my Big Theme Camp /Project and be my Bitch?

stop PM ing me you Perverted Sickos!***


***except the lovely young woman who sent me her photo....you're hired, bring the ball gag as shown, i have all the other stuff...