Ask Eric

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Eric
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Eric » Sun Aug 03, 2014 10:32 pm

Sic Pup wrote:Is it wrong to dress people with your mind?
Absolutely not. I do it all the time - usually in a burka, regardless of gender.
theCryptofishist wrote:Why isn't your birthday an international holiday?
I don't need the plebs sullying it.
Elorrum wrote:I was going to ask something along this line. Isn't it a wonderful day? I hope so.
I don't remember. So yes.
theCryptofishist wrote:So, I've rekindled my love of Ak-Maks, which leads me to wonder: What is the best cracker for the playa?
Does it matter if you're not going?
Jovankat wrote:What is an Ak-Mak?
Does Google not work in Australia?
pink wrote:Maybe we need an ask Fishy thread? :wink:
Isn't that every thread?
Lonesomebri wrote:When would be the appropriate time to notify the boss of my new camp that I have zero structural, building, social, organizational, knot tying skills?
About 15 minutes after they need you to do any of those things. Then move your hippie ass to Center Camp.
Just_Joe wrote:As a corrollary, what's the best way to dimiss a campmate who you believed had command of said skills.
Pack their tent & supplies into a neat pile with a sweet "bye-bye" note attached (directions to Center Camp are optional)
Jovankat wrote:In a related vein, how does one politely explain why it's upsetting that a camp mate with said skills who was sold a ticket based on said skills is now saying they think they're going to go to a party rather then come help at early entry?
If they've paid for the ticket your screwed on that end, but retract their EA offer (since they haven't been issued yet), and when they arrive let them know that they'll need to find a new place to set up. No need to be polite to a mooch, no need to invite drama to live in your camp. Feel free to let them know of this in advance.
theCryptofishist wrote:How to I make sure that no one thinks I'm with those three clowns persons above me?
Camp somewhere else.
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theCryptofishist
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by theCryptofishist » Mon Aug 04, 2014 10:09 pm

Eric wrote:
theCryptofishist wrote:So, I've rekindled my love of Ak-Maks, which leads me to wonder: What is the best cracker for the playa?
Does it matter if you're not going?
Wait, is this an invitation to give an answer on your thread, or just a rhetorical question?
The Lady with a Lamprey

"The powerful are exploiting people, art and ideas, and this leads to us plebes debating how to best ration ice.
Man, no wonder they always win....." Lonesomebri

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Re: Ask Eric

Post by theCryptofishist » Mon Aug 04, 2014 10:09 pm

Or a trap!
The Lady with a Lamprey

"The powerful are exploiting people, art and ideas, and this leads to us plebes debating how to best ration ice.
Man, no wonder they always win....." Lonesomebri

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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Eric » Tue Aug 05, 2014 12:32 am

theCryptofishist wrote:Or a trap!
It's not even a challenge anymore.
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Oldguy » Tue Aug 05, 2014 12:54 am

The Ak-Mak whole wheat crackers have been made for four generations by the Soojians, an Armenian family.
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Eric » Tue Aug 05, 2014 10:52 am

Oldguy wrote:The Ak-Mak whole wheat crackers have been made for four generations by the Soojians, an Armenian family.
Thanks google-guy, that was thrilling.
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Oldguy » Tue Aug 05, 2014 12:14 pm

You are very welcome, I am happy to help all burners. Do you ever think your head is too big for your hat? :coffee:
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Eric » Tue Aug 05, 2014 12:44 pm

Oldguy wrote:You are very welcome, I am happy to help all burners. Do you ever think your head is too big for your hat? :coffee:

Absolutely not - I try on all hats to make sure they can contain all that is the wonderfulness of my ego and wisdom*.




*I also highly recommend reading at least a few pages of this thread to see the kind of answers you can expect in here. It's in Open Discussion for a reason...
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Oldguy » Tue Aug 05, 2014 1:19 pm

Dear Eric, Is there a cure for my passive/ aggressive behavior? Sometimes it bites me in the ass, not that there is anything wrong with that. :coffee:
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by MyDearFriend » Tue Aug 05, 2014 2:05 pm

Dear Eric,

It's that time of year again! I have more projects left to finish than days left to do them. My question is: which ones do I jettison?
"Burning Man ruined my life as I knew it, and I have never been happier." -mgb327

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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Eric » Tue Aug 05, 2014 7:48 pm

Oldguy wrote:Dear Eric, Is there a cure for my passive/ aggressive behavior? Sometimes it bites me in the ass, not that there is anything wrong with that. :coffee:
Generally the only cure for a passive/ aggressive personality is to walk away from that person. Since that person is you, however, I would strongly encourage becoming schizophrenic. That way you can change personalities when it hits.
MyDearFriend wrote:It's that time of year again! I have more projects left to finish than days left to do them. My question is: which ones do I jettison?
First get rid of the kind of boring ones, then get rid of ones that there is no realistic way to finish, then toss the ones you don't actually need for this year. You should now be down to, at tops, three projects, and one of those doesn't actually need to go this year. You're welcome.
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by southern crone » Thu Aug 07, 2014 1:31 am

Dear Eric,

Since I didn't get a ticket for this years burn and am eagerly awaiting next years burn, can I start a countdown now or should I wait for this years burn to end?

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Re: Ask Eric

Post by tatonka » Fri Aug 08, 2014 12:25 pm

Dear Eric
If I opened a store and called it Namaste , what would I sell in there?
Those who are able to see beyond the shadows and lies of their culture will never be understood, let alone believed by the masses.
-Plato

If a good man is offered power , he has to lower himself to pick it up .

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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Eric » Fri Aug 08, 2014 1:14 pm

southern crone wrote:Since I didn't get a ticket for this years burn and am eagerly awaiting next years burn, can I start a countdown now or should I wait for this years burn to end?
Start the countdown now, start saving the monies (I would recommend the pre-sale if you can afford it), and get really drunk on Burn Night while joining Camp Envy watching the webcam.

tatonka wrote:If I opened a store and called it Namaste , what would I sell in there?
Tea that you never have in stock.


Don't worry, I'll wait.
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by forty_eight » Fri Aug 08, 2014 1:24 pm

Eric wrote:
Tea that you never have in stock.
If he did have tea in stock - and plenty of it, would it be called "Yamaste"?

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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Eric » Fri Aug 08, 2014 4:31 pm

48_love wrote:If he did have tea in stock - and plenty of it, would it be called "Yamaste"?

Thank you for destroying two different languages. It would be called Simaste.
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Oldguy » Fri Aug 08, 2014 5:06 pm

For the love of G_D, I get it finally. You know when people say, " Don't be that guy."; I just realized that "I" am that guy... DOH!

Self-realization is fine, except, when it is "you" they are suggesting is that guy; and you are too fucking dumb and unaware that it is you and not "them".

I sincerely am sorry, if I have been the pot calling the kettle black.

The veil has become lifted. I am whole again. A new star shines bright in the heavens. It's all puppies and lollipops. There is now no war, no poverty, no disease, no freaks of nature, no fire, flood or earthquake. We will all go to heaven and we will live lives of purpose, love, and harmony.

Namaste, Motherfucker.

Edited to say sorry. this is the ask Eric page. It is not the Second page. My other personality has been fucking with me all week.

Dear Eric, will "I" ever "get" IT.
Last edited by Oldguy on Fri Aug 08, 2014 5:12 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by forty_eight » Fri Aug 08, 2014 5:07 pm

lol

I was going for "already" more tea ... but if one has to explain a joke, etc etc. :)

If they served "enough tea already", could it be called "Yabaste" or maybe "Yabastate"?

(now that is a bastardization of language, but I am a pro-bastard type of guy)

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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Eric » Fri Aug 08, 2014 6:13 pm

Oldguy wrote:Dear Eric, will "I" ever "get" IT.
Apparently not, if you confuse this for Page Two.
48_love wrote:If they served "enough tea already", could it be called "Yabaste" or maybe "Yabastate"?
They would probably look over the rim of their glasses at you, and say the joke has been beaten into the ground. Y'allmusgo.
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by lucky420 » Sat Aug 09, 2014 10:48 am

Eric,

What the fuck is ugly dougly's avatar? Dried out rasta dreads, ginger root? Just what the fuck is that?
Oh my god, it's HUGE!

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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Eric » Sat Aug 09, 2014 3:39 pm

lucky420 wrote:What the fuck is ugly dougly's avatar? Dried out rasta dreads, ginger root? Just what the fuck is that?
It is an ugly floral dress, sayeth my partner The Google.
UG.PNG
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Lonesomebri » Sat Aug 09, 2014 4:41 pm

Dear Eric,

I have been welcomed into a nice Theme Camp, even though that is really not my style. I figure to maintain my own nominally independent bastion and fold my camp into the fringe of their camp. People keep posting, wanting to join a camp, and I was wondering the ethics of me subletting out a sliver of my domain (one corner of my tent) to these needy stragglers wanting to belong? Kinda like I do here in SF with renting out my garage closet to the techie scum. The thing is, I very much prefer living with the notion, rather than me "joining", the idea that to me someone is "beholden".

My questions (4):
What if my tent is officially part of another Theme Camp, yet lining the interior of my tent I set up my own inner circle of blue flags?
How many people do I need in my tent to make it an official Theme Camp with placement, early entry, and the ability to avoid the greeters?
How long after first meeting and joining a functioning camp put together by others should one wait to try and take it over?
What would be a good name for a chill camp made up of amazing individual(s), unfairly forced into Center Camp exile?
"If this is the best of all possible worlds, what are the others?"
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Jackass » Sat Aug 09, 2014 5:04 pm

Dear Eric,

How long after cutting myself on a sharp object while visiting Camp Threat, will it take to have full blown tetanus or staph infections? Do I go get a shot, or just take some shots? Should I take antibiotics as a preventative measure, if I plan on stopping by there? I already have Anti-B hand wash...
Sooner or later, it will get real strange...

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Re: Ask Eric

Post by FossaFerox » Sat Aug 09, 2014 5:22 pm

Dear Eric,

Should I sew in the spare set of fairy lights or just leave it as is?
ygmir wrote:Everyone loves you there, and no one cares a shit about you..........all at once. and vice versa.

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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Eric » Sat Aug 09, 2014 7:54 pm

Lonesomebri wrote:Dear Eric, [etc. etc. etc.]
You're the kind of person who either (a) gets invited to a sit-down formal dinner and brings a dozen extra guests unannounced, or (b) never gets invited to formal sit-down dinners because they assume you would do (a). Humbly grovel apologies to the camp lead who invited you to camp with them, or you may get your dream of a private theme camp this year (blue flags not included).
Jackass wrote:How long after cutting myself on a sharp object while visiting Camp Threat, will it take to have full blown tetanus or staph infections? Do I go get a shot, or just take some shots? Should I take antibiotics as a preventative measure, if I plan on stopping by there? I already have Anti-B hand wash...
Just keep rubbing in playa dust. It will kill off the staph & the tetanus, and you should only require minor corrective surgery when you get back home.
FossaFerox wrote:Should I sew in the spare set of fairy lights or just leave it as is?
There is no "spare", this is only more waiting to be added. Always choose add.
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by BoyScoutGirl » Sun Aug 10, 2014 4:12 pm

Eric, how does the secret handshake go again?
When he lights his streetlamp, it is as if he brought one more star to life, or one flower.
When he puts out his lamp, he sends the flower, or the star, to sleep.
That is a beautiful occupation.

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Re: Ask Eric

Post by jneilvindy » Sun Aug 10, 2014 4:15 pm

Dear Eric;

For my evening wear shirtcocker tee should I go with reflective Velcro strips or fairy lights?

The reason for my quandary is with fairy lights the battery pack could prove....problematic.

On a related note, is one tee for the week standard or is it permissible to have a fresh tee daily?

Thank you so much for your insightful wisdom!

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Re: Ask Eric

Post by goathead » Wed Sep 10, 2014 2:50 pm

Dear Eric

This year I was meet with many "Have a Happy Burn", and was meet by almost as many blank looks when I replied "Fuck your day"

Do we need diapers for burgins?

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Re: Ask Eric

Post by Eric » Wed Sep 10, 2014 7:13 pm

Oh look, I'm a month behind.
BoyScoutGirl wrote:Eric, how does the secret handshake go again?
What proof do I have that you knew it in the first place?
jneilvindy wrote:Thank you so much for your insightful wisdom!
Hopefully you were able to muddle through the Burn without it, since I didn't give it in time. The answer, however, is "yes"
goathead wrote:This year I was meet with many "Have a Happy Burn", and was meet by almost as many blank looks when I replied "Fuck your day"

Do we need diapers for burgins?
I was thinking de-culting camps, but diapers would work for a start. Big bats that have "reality check" engraved in them would work as well, if you're liable to use them (and I know you are).
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Re: Ask Eric

Post by graidawg » Wed Sep 10, 2014 7:23 pm

dear Eric can you forgive me for putting down your ginger cordial at the meet n greet and then finding it had been opened and drunk?
FREE THE SHERPAS
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