The Bar 2019 Edition...

All things outside of Burning Man.
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Elorrum
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by Elorrum » Tue Mar 05, 2019 7:16 pm

You've got some neat bars there, ygmir, cozy for the season, lots of potential. I'll have to blow the cobwebs off my photoshop.
"Ask again later." - Magic 8-Ball

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ygmir
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by ygmir » Tue Mar 05, 2019 8:17 pm

Elorrum wrote:
Tue Mar 05, 2019 7:16 pm
You've got some neat bars there, ygmir, cozy for the season, lots of potential. I'll have to blow the cobwebs off my photoshop.
please do! The Viking corner could use some help... and, well, you are the all time bar designer...
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FIGJAM
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by FIGJAM » Thu Mar 07, 2019 6:55 am

03_07_19_f7fbc3748deccbdfe1d5b739035aa86d.jpg
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by ygmir » Thu Mar 07, 2019 7:45 am

thanks for the morning chuckle, FJ!!
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Skuzzy61
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by Skuzzy61 » Thu Mar 07, 2019 10:15 am

FIGJAM wrote:
Thu Mar 07, 2019 6:55 am
03_07_19_f7fbc3748deccbdfe1d5b739035aa86d.jpg
Could have used that information couple of months ago!!!!
As the camp evolves.....
We got this! 2016/2019
We had it! 2020
We almost lost it! 2021
We have no idea where it is! 2022
Who the hell are we and why are we here? 2023

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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by ygmir » Fri Mar 08, 2019 10:43 pm

*wanders in bar*
Just drove home from Reno, dang, there's lots of snow on Donner summit! roads were snowy but fine, I have studded snow tires on my F250, so it's a breeze.
Had a wonderful, if not too short, visit with AntiM, Piney and TITWI! so nice to see the gang!
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by Skuzzy61 » Sat Mar 09, 2019 6:27 am

*pulls up a stool at the bar,....orders something strong*

Ever had one of those days? Slugs down a shot......slowly recants a wall of text......

So,.here you are,..sitting in front of your computer, contemplating the days events and eating a banana. When, suddenly, without warning, the banana decides to break in the middle and starts to fall towards your lap!

You quickly reach to catch the out of control nanner and, instead you hit the keyboard with your hand and hurl it into the mouse!

The mouse scurries across the desk like a drunk driver on any Texas freeway after midnight on Friday night, and collides with the stapler.

You sit there, with a nanner in yer lap, while the stapler teeters and falls to the floor. No big deal, except to your cat that happened to be sitting on the floor next to you.

The cat goes straight up in the air, and you sit there thinking, "Oh god! This is not going to end well!", and sure enough, all 4 paws of the insane animal are stabbing your through your sweats. Did I mention the cat has not been de-clawed?

You jump, all the while knowing that you really should not do that, and your legs catch the desk and rock the desk backwards.

You now have, not only a grimace from the pain, on your face, but a look of shock as your computer monitor rocks back on its pedestal and starts to slide back off the desk! All the while the cat is growing more insane!

Instinctively, again..no conscious thought would have allowed you to do this, you reach for the monitor, while the cat is climbing your torso, and with the remaining nanner in yer hand, you smash it into your monitor. None of which helps slow the monitors eventual departure from the desk.

But low and behold, your monitor stops! You can see the face of it, but it is not falling any more. As your mind starts to query as to why it stopped, you suddenly hear your network switch start to slide!

An immediate fear enters your already confused brain as the monitor starts to move downward and the switch heads right towards it, as the cat is now clinging to your head. Now, more than ever, you wish your hair would catch fire!

As you desperately try to circumvent the purging, of your desk, of all computer related gear and keep your eyes from being pulled out by the cat, you fall back into your chair, where the other half of the nanner lies as it had made its escape from your lap when you jumped up.

Just in time for the switch to come crashing down on top of the monitor, followed by the cable modem/router, followed by the pencil sharpener, and the last vestige of your nanner.

So there you sit..on a nanner,...with monitor on floor and all manner of equipment on top of it, a cat on top of your head, blood oozing from several areas of your body and a fist full of smashed nanner.

I really used to love nanners.
As the camp evolves.....
We got this! 2016/2019
We had it! 2020
We almost lost it! 2021
We have no idea where it is! 2022
Who the hell are we and why are we here? 2023

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lucky420
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by lucky420 » Sat Mar 09, 2019 7:27 am

Hey at least you were wearing pants ^^^
Oh my god, it's HUGE!

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ygmir
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by ygmir » Sat Mar 09, 2019 8:03 am

hahaha Skuzzy! very good, and very well done!! Thanks for the laugh! Bravo!

How about a cartoon?

*pushes tv clicker*


*heads for ROS*
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by Skuzzy61 » Sat Mar 09, 2019 11:10 am

*I think I'll have another....(as I grimace from the bandages pulling at my hair)"
As the camp evolves.....
We got this! 2016/2019
We had it! 2020
We almost lost it! 2021
We have no idea where it is! 2022
Who the hell are we and why are we here? 2023

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FIGJAM
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by FIGJAM » Sun Mar 10, 2019 7:46 am

bl190310.jpg
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by ygmir » Sun Mar 10, 2019 8:16 am

Skuzzy61 wrote:
Sat Mar 09, 2019 11:10 am
*I think I'll have another....(as I grimace from the bandages pulling at my hair)"
you don't wax?
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by Skuzzy61 » Sun Mar 10, 2019 9:26 am

ygmir wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2019 8:16 am
Skuzzy61 wrote:
Sat Mar 09, 2019 11:10 am
*I think I'll have another....(as I grimace from the bandages pulling at my hair)"
you don't wax?
There is not enough alcohol in the world to get me to do that. I like my fur coat. Keeps me warm in the winter and acts as an insulator in the summer.

Besides, I tried it once. The poor girl is probably still undergoing reconstructive surgery after gnawing on the heel of my foot, which happened to fracture a few things of hers.

Where's that damn drink!?!?!?
As the camp evolves.....
We got this! 2016/2019
We had it! 2020
We almost lost it! 2021
We have no idea where it is! 2022
Who the hell are we and why are we here? 2023

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Patsh
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by Patsh » Sun Mar 10, 2019 4:21 pm

Thought I'd drop by and check out the new-ish bar! Not bad, I must say...

*pulls tiny fan from pack, sets it up and tosses a handful of playa dust at it*
That's better!!

Nice to see some familiar faces again. I miss everyone!
Drinks all around! :mrgreen:
formerly, Triken

keep on triken' Mamma!
Triken' ma blues away....
.


Theatre is Life
Cinema is Art
Television is Furniture

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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by ygmir » Mon Mar 11, 2019 7:39 am

*rides in on War Rabbit*
*unsaddles him, lets him forage, sets bowl of Cheese Doodles in Da Mules stall*
Hi Patsh!! good to seeya dropping in!
*heads for ROS*
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by FIGJAM » Mon Mar 11, 2019 9:07 am

It's National Napping Day......so bundle under your fleece and relax. 8)
"Don't buy ur Burn...........Build ur Burn!"

"If I can't find an answer, I'll create one!!!"

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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by ygmir » Tue Mar 12, 2019 7:53 am

FIGJAM wrote:
Mon Mar 11, 2019 9:07 am
It's National Napping Day......so bundle under your fleece and relax. 8)
NAP TIME!!
*runs to open Lounge Adjoining Bar In Annex, Couch Of Carnal Knowledge, Beds Over Others Beds In Energized Sleep*
*flops on ROS*
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LeonardPotato
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by LeonardPotato » Tue Mar 12, 2019 1:14 pm

mgb327 wrote:
Fri Mar 01, 2019 3:39 pm
Yes there is...same place it always was...in the Ladies RestRoom.
and that your honor is why I was in the ladies restroom...
To days of inspiration, playing hooky, making something out of nothing. The need to express, to communicate. To going against the grain, going insane, going mad. To love and tension, no pension. To more than one dimension

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Elliot
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by Elliot » Sat Mar 23, 2019 1:24 pm

Image

Click buzzzz scratch hum….

Bar doors creak slowly open and reveal a befuddled-looking face… gently backlit by the struggling rays of mid-morning sunlight.
He seems familiar in a distant sort’a way to the long-time regulars, but utterly alien and irrelevant to the younger crowd.
Slight limp, close-cropped hair and graying beard – he speaks in a tone of uncertainly, maybe even fear.

Uh… ah… er....
Oh, Patsh! You are here! Am I ever glad to see you!


The fellow pulls a postcard from his shirt-pocket – a card that Patsh lovingly crafted with her own dainty-but-precise fingers in 1971. The card reads “YES YES YES” and so on.

Image



He reaches Patsh & Greg who are dancing slowly toward him. He greets Greg cheerfully and says….

May I cut in?

…Then sweeps Patsh into his arms and gives her a hug that lights up even the dankest corners of the Bar. (Consent safely unquestioned thru long friendship.)

He musters a stronger voice and announces:

Yesterday… I did something truly astonishing. And this old card helped me do it.

The regulars drift discretely closer and try to listen.

I…. I asked a lady for a date. Yes, a date – meet after work and talk and look at the sunset or something.
.
.
.
.
.
Pandemonium erupts in the Bar.
.
.
.
Order is eventually restored.

She said “Cannot today, but maybe another time”.
So I handed her a scrap of paper with my e-mail and phone-number. And she grabbed it – eagerly. Eagerly, I swear. Eagerly!

I’m dying here, Patsh. This cannot end well?!



Announcer:
You have been listening to Silent Radio Theater, sponsored by our good friends at Elliot’s Naked Bicycle Service. Stay tuned for the exiting next episode of As The Old Bicycle Mechanic Turns on most of these same stations.

Image
Our address in 2019 is at 4:00 & Cupid
NOW HIRING BICYCLE TECHNICIANS
Elliot's Naked Bicycle Service, Massage Clinic, Body Painting Studio, & Piano Lounge
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Ratty
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by Ratty » Sat Mar 23, 2019 7:24 pm

Cozy. Makes me want to settle in.
Those aren't buttermilk biscuits I'm lying on Savannah

Pictures or it didn't happen Greycoyote

Talent hits a target no one else can hit; Genius hits a target no one else can see.
Arthur Schopenhauer

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Patsh
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by Patsh » Sat Mar 23, 2019 8:04 pm

Elliot wrote:
Sat Mar 23, 2019 1:24 pm
Image

Click buzzzz scratch hum….

Bar doors creak slowly open and reveal a befuddled-looking face… gently backlit by the struggling rays of mid-morning sunlight.
He seems familiar in a distant sort’a way to the long-time regulars, but utterly alien and irrelevant to the younger crowd.
Slight limp, close-cropped hair and graying beard – he speaks in a tone of uncertainly, maybe even fear.

Uh… ah… er....
Oh, Patsh! You are here! Am I ever glad to see you!


The fellow pulls a postcard from his shirt-pocket – a card that Patsh lovingly crafted with her own dainty-but-precise fingers in 1971. The card reads “YES YES YES” and so on.

Image



He reaches Patsh & Greg who are dancing slowly toward him. He greets Greg cheerfully and says….

May I cut in?

…Then sweeps Patsh into his arms and gives her a hug that lights up even the dankest corners of the Bar. (Consent safely unquestioned thru long friendship.)

He musters a stronger voice and announces:

Yesterday… I did something truly astonishing. And this old card helped me do it.

The regulars drift discretely closer and try to listen.

I…. I asked a lady for a date. Yes, a date – meet after work and talk and look at the sunset or something.
.
.
.
.
.
Pandemonium erupts in the Bar.
.
.
.
Order is eventually restored.

She said “Cannot today, but maybe another time”.
So I handed her a scrap of paper with my e-mail and phone-number. And she grabbed it – eagerly. Eagerly, I swear. Eagerly!

I’m dying here, Patsh. This cannot end well?!



Announcer:
You have been listening to Silent Radio Theater, sponsored by our good friends at Elliot’s Naked Bicycle Service. Stay tuned for the exiting next episode of As The Old Bicycle Mechanic Turns on most of these same stations.

Image
Being the Unrelenting Optimist that I've been accused of being (for over 6 decades, now) I want to say, Elliot... this CAN indeed end well! And, I'll be here, rooting for you with bells and pompoms!
formerly, Triken

keep on triken' Mamma!
Triken' ma blues away....
.


Theatre is Life
Cinema is Art
Television is Furniture

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Elliot
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by Elliot » Sun Mar 24, 2019 1:10 am

Image


Image

Hoot-honk-blow- toot….

Screeeeach….
Click.


Tic-a-tic-a-tic-a-tic-a-tic…. (Teletype machine in the background.)

Announcer:
We interrupt the Flugelhorn Concerto in H Minor to bring you this Hecka Major News Bulletin.
Please stand by for our reporter in the field.

Buzz, click.

Muffled scream.

Silence.

Announcer:
Are you there, Mr. Smith?

Breathless reporter Smith:
Studio, can you hear me? Am I on?

Announcer:
Can you tell our listeners what you see there, Mr. Smith?

Smith:
Oh, the humanity!


Image


Announcer:
Calm yourself if you can, Smith. What is actually happening?

Smith:
I swear, Boss… I have not been drinking! And I could not make this stuff up to save my life!
(Collects himself, slightly.)

At 6:30 this afternoon – eyewitnesses tell me – the telephone rang at the
Elliot’s Naked Bicycle Service World Headquarters Tower and Barn….
(Gasping noises.)

I repeat, the telephone actually rang!

Announcer:
Yes, yes, go on!

Smith:
And it was not…. I repeat, not… Howie’s latest infernal-robo-calling-monster-tele-marketing-dialer! I say again! NOT!

Announcer:
Well, for svarte fanden danse på tå hev langt inn i granskogen! Tell us who it was, man!

Smith:
It was… it was… HER!
.
.
.
.
.
.
(Angry voice in background: Darn it, George, didn’t you cue the Pandemonium sound?!)


( [ Whispering. ] Go to commercial! Go to commercial!)


Click, buzz, hum, click.


Ensemble:
Broken bike, broken bike, la la la la la.
Let Elliot repair your bike, la la la la la.

Announcer #2:
(In silly musical tone.)
Annnd… the 37th caller to correctly identify the melody of our sponsors jingle… wins a brand new half-roll of single ply.



Ominous lengthy silence, except for random distant electric squeaks.




Voice:
Anybody there? Anybody there? Where is everyone?
Strange….
I seem to be in a land overrun by… surprise. And astonishment.

Over there! More astonishment!

Sheer surprise everywhere.
Nothing moves. Shock… holding the very air still.

Ah, there is someone now….
I say! Hello there!
Have you found any others? In wooden ships, perchance?

Someone Now:
No. The sudden jolt in the life forces must have been too much for them. They are all repeating only one word, incessantly: “YES. YES. YES.”

Voice:
What do you make of it? You are a rocket surgeon, I see by your lab coat. What can have happened?

Someone Now:
Oh, that does not take a rocket surgeon to figure out.
It was Elliot.
He asked a lady for a date, and gave her his telephone number.

Voice:
Yes, yes…?

Someone Now:
And the next day… she called.

(George fires off the Pandemonium Machine with gusto.)
.
.
.
.
Someone Now, resuming:
She told him… she had queried her friends about this fellow Elliot who asked her out, and…. Many of her friends know him, and vouched for him.
(Pauses for deep breaths.)

And… one of her friends said… Elliot is a good egg, and a bit eclectic – he goes to Burning Man every year.
(Breathes some more.)

And… and… this lady…
(Sobs.)

…this lady… has been planning for months already to go to her first Burn this year.
.
.
.
.
The Pandemonium Machine detonates and levels the Silent Radio Theater studio and affiliated territories.



The next morning.

News boys:
Extra, extra! Read all about it!
Double surprise of the Century!
Elliot goes on a date, and guess what!

Extra, extra! Read all about it!
Double surprise of the Century!
Elliot goes on a date, and guess what!

Extra, extra! Read all about it!
------------------------------------------------------

With apologies to H.G. Wells and Orson Welles and his Martians of 1938, Crosby Stills & Nash and their purple berries to keep two guys alive, and all the ships at sea.
Our address in 2019 is at 4:00 & Cupid
NOW HIRING BICYCLE TECHNICIANS
Elliot's Naked Bicycle Service, Massage Clinic, Body Painting Studio, & Piano Lounge
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Skuzzy61
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by Skuzzy61 » Sun Mar 24, 2019 6:09 am

And here I thought I created a wall-o-text,.......I am humbled and maybe a bit hungover.
As the camp evolves.....
We got this! 2016/2019
We had it! 2020
We almost lost it! 2021
We have no idea where it is! 2022
Who the hell are we and why are we here? 2023

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ygmir
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by ygmir » Sun Mar 24, 2019 8:16 am

*rides in on War Rabbitt*
*strolls through swinging doors, noting complete disarray from what seems like a celebration, previous*
HI Skuzzy!
Wow, Elliot!!! Good news!! So happy for you!
I still have a white tux and gold lame' booty shorts if you want to borrow them!

*heads for ROS*
YGMIR

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Ratty
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by Ratty » Sun Mar 24, 2019 10:10 am

*Wanders in and finds the old Commidor 64 under the tarp* Hey, Anybody want to watch the BM Theme Camp Symposium with me?
Those aren't buttermilk biscuits I'm lying on Savannah

Pictures or it didn't happen Greycoyote

Talent hits a target no one else can hit; Genius hits a target no one else can see.
Arthur Schopenhauer

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Elliot
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by Elliot » Mon Mar 25, 2019 11:31 pm

Thanks, Ygmir!
Not sure if she is ready to see me in that outfit yet. LOL

We are taking this very slowly and carefully, as if we were adults or something. No ass-over-applecart emotions this time, no thank you.

She works in a local grocery store, and we have been eyeing each other a little bit across the check-stand for years. At least I have. And our conversations have "progressed" ever so slowly from the standard pleasantries to "full sentences".

Then, the other day, she was all exited about the full moon and the stars (clean air here, and little artificial light) and some such from the night before.
And somehow... all my brain-sparkplugs fired up in close-to-correct-order, and I asked if she would show me this celestial spectacle that evening.
First time in my bleeping life... my brain has processed anything that quickly.

Driving home, I kept wondering: Did I just utter a PICKUP LINE???
There must be a first time for everything, I reckon.

Writing it up as a resurrection of Silent Radio Theater (which last appeared on ePlaya a dozen or so years ago)... was probably a subconscious distraction to keep myself from freaking out. LOL

No time or energy for Silent Radio Theater today, though. Too much camp preparation work to do. Looks like another all-nighter now.

( Finishes drink and leaves Bar in purposeful strides. )
Our address in 2019 is at 4:00 & Cupid
NOW HIRING BICYCLE TECHNICIANS
Elliot's Naked Bicycle Service, Massage Clinic, Body Painting Studio, & Piano Lounge
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Skuzzy61
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by Skuzzy61 » Tue Mar 26, 2019 4:25 am

Way to go Elliot!

I never did get a handle on pickup lines. I was about as smooth as porcupine in full froth mode (no prickly jokes, you bunch of drunktards! Yes, I saw where you were going!).
As the camp evolves.....
We got this! 2016/2019
We had it! 2020
We almost lost it! 2021
We have no idea where it is! 2022
Who the hell are we and why are we here? 2023

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FIGJAM
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by FIGJAM » Tue Mar 26, 2019 6:12 am

nq190326.gif
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"Don't buy ur Burn...........Build ur Burn!"

"If I can't find an answer, I'll create one!!!"

Fuck Im Good Just Ask Me

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ygmir
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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by ygmir » Tue Mar 26, 2019 8:27 am

y'know Elliot, IMHO, I'd say you used less of a "pick up line" and more of a nice "hey, I'd like to know you a little better and spend some time with you" line?....I mean, it was not cheesy or anything, and well, "what's a person to do"? Good on ya, though!
Skuzzy61 wrote:
Tue Mar 26, 2019 4:25 am
(no prickly jokes, you bunch of drunktards! Yes, I saw where you were going!).
*blinks innocently*

we're getting more rain this week....I love and appreciate rain, and winter. That said, I have some concrete jobs to do, that are falling far behind schedule. We usually get some "days longs" breaks in the weather in spring, so I told people I could "probably" (I did hedge my statement, just in case) get them done by May 1....now, not so sure. I also wish I had another helper. I'm busier than I've been in years, and have to do most of it myself.
YGMIR

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Re: The Bar 2019 Edition...

Post by Skuzzy61 » Tue Mar 26, 2019 9:26 am

ROFL! *slips off stool* (nobody saw that,....yeah,...i am certain of that).
As the camp evolves.....
We got this! 2016/2019
We had it! 2020
We almost lost it! 2021
We have no idea where it is! 2022
Who the hell are we and why are we here? 2023

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