ePlaya

Look the title says it all really.
I’m being bullied right now after doing months of work. I’m a builder and I don’t want to screw anyone over, but I’m getting silent treatment, or verbally abused for offering to help on wider camp topics.
I dont know what to do.

I have anxiety attacks when messages from the lead come in.
Should I take my stewards sale tickets and join a more positive camp?

What does the e-playa think?
Can anyone direct me towards resources to help with this situation?

Love and dusty hug
LBFE

Stewards Sale tickets are camp specific. They are sold to campers who are approved by the camp to enable individuals needed by the camp to attend. If you are not going to attend BM with the camp who let you get a ticket it should be voided. You might want to talk to ticketing about this.
Leads are incredibly busy this time of year, juggling their day jobs and all the camp detail. They may not have time to assign a job to someone whose skills they don't know. Do what your lead tells/asks you to do this year and after you have attended for a while then look for more.

I’m no n00b pop-eye. This is burn 15
I’ve built with big camps and been orga on regionals. I’m on first arrive for the last three brc burns.
I seriously don’t need the static, and I’m super surprised your answer is “put up with it”

There has to be another way.

Popeye wrote: ↑

Tue Jun 07, 2022 11:05 am

. You might want to talk to ticketing about this.

Tho this is a good idea…. I’ll raise it
Thanking you

Doesn't make a difference how many burns you've participated in, those tickets were allocated to the camp. By participating in the camp's allocation in the Steward's sale you essentially made a commitment to the camp. However, if you no longer want a part of that operation, make other ticketing arrangements for yourself, and make arrangements for the camp to buy the steward's sale tickets back at face value.

trilobyte wrote: ↑

Tue Jun 07, 2022 12:15 pm

Doesn't make a difference how many burns you've participated in, those tickets were allocated to the camp. By participating in the camp's allocation in the Steward's sale you essentially made a commitment to the camp. However, if you no longer want a part of that operation, make other ticketing arrangements for yourself, and make arrangements for the camp to buy the steward's sale tickets back at face value.

I've gotta 100% agree with this ...

If the camp is being toxic, ditch the camp and make your own way to the desert. But that ticket was allocated to you as a part of the camp. If you bail (and it sounds like a good idea), the ticket should go back to the camp.

Well let’s break this down and see how we can get you through this mess!

“I’m a builder and I don’t want to screw anyone over, but I’m getting silent treatment,”

You are a builder. That’s good. I gather this is how you got the steward ticket gig; to build stuff, yes?

You don’t want to screw anyone over. OK, that’s good but unexpected in that spot. Good for you - I sense there is a story behind this non-screwing event, but yes, no screwing anyone over is good.

You are getting the silent treatment. - Interesting. Does this prevent you from building? Is it really a bad thing?

Maybe after decades of marriage my view on the “silent treatment” has become more welcoming of the serenity it provides … but that’s me.

Moving along …

“verbally abused for offering to help on wider camp topics.”

So, you get yelled at for wanting to help with other camp stuff beyond the building gig you got the ticket for?

I mean, are the rest of the guys n gals sucking at the wider camp stuff? Did the camp fuck up the work and the wider camp stuff is not getting done?

The way this all sounds to me … you got some skills and craft at building, you landed a gig and got a ticket for it, but what you really want to do is run the damn thing.

It looks like others in the camp want nothing of the sorts, so they cope with it and keep their cool, or “give you the silent treatment”, as you say.

Then, when you can’t help yourself and gotta poke your nose in where you got no business poking, you get yelled at and “verbally abused”.

Am I reading this right?

15 years on the Playa and this the first time you gotta deal with this kind of shit?!

Man, some folks get all the luck!

Hope this helps you out, maybe gets you to tell us what’s really going on and why you got it so bad.

Burning man is too short to waste your talents working under shitty leadership. Unfortunately it's the shitty leadership that often holds control over so many of the DGS tickets.

Take a deep breath. Deescalate the situation on both sides. Explain to your camp that you will only respond to emails and texts once a day, say after dinner. Explain to the leadership that life is stressful and you are going to focus on your X responsibilities, do that and copy the other key campers on your communication. Don't volunteer to save the camp. Use active listening in your email replies: "I understand what you are saying is P. I understand exactly what you are asking is Q. Therefore I am going to do R to do Q. Then subsequently Q is done." The leadership is responsible for filling the other roles. You know your regional. Reach out to them privately on playa to find your next camp or form a new one. Leave gracefully without criticizing your current camp. If they have people problems, karma will correct them. If you are a builder you will be welcomed by another eurocamp for 2023. Enjoy your burn.

I agree with some seeing eye on this. Silent treatment and general lack of communication is not likely to solve anything. Make that effort, or build a bridge back if you will. It may result in the person in question improving, or other people becoming more actively involved to make sure you (and others) aren't feeling alienated or disconnected.

There’s not enough info for anyone to tell you much.
What exactly is the problem?
DON’T “help on wider topics” if they don’t want or need it.
What does that even mean?

Build your shit to the letter of the request and no more, ignore anything dumb you see happening in the rest of the camp. Then go to Burning Man and have a good time. Use the camp as a place to sleep and then go find your real friends. If the camp is pissed off you're not acting like part of the group, well, they closed that door already.

Never go to the burn with a toxic camp. This is a time for relaxation and enjoyment. I may be able to hep with a non-stewards ticket if you desire to drop your camp.