why the cannes film festival is better than burning man

buttrose · Post by **buttrose** » Thu Apr 22, 2010 5:23 pm

* doesn't actively practice censorship of criticism
* critical tits is discrete, sexy and doesn't mow over your personal experience
* temperate weather
* paris hilton camps at the du Cap, not in an impossible to reach RV
* class is determined by your skill in obtaining a priority badge, not your skill in sucking off a member of the LLC
* a real beach, not a playa
* when you order a double you get a quadruple
* better fireworks at the end of the festival
* people are mostly friendly, and speak a funny language
* more subjects to talk about with strangers than 'where are you from?'
* no DPW parade
* mini bar & room service
* celebrates entertainment and doesn't pretend that everyone should be a participant
* has a long celebrated history
* rituals are known bores, and are discouraged
* is a creative industry that doesn't pretend to be a movement
* cannot be described as a cult; you are free to skip a year without being ostracized as a malcontent
* all of your friends don't attend, so you can get distance from it in the off-season
* no spiritual nazis - nothing is sacred

Post by **Sham** » Thu Apr 22, 2010 6:44 pm

Will you be coming this year for your first visit, buttmuffin?

Kiro · Post by **Kiro** » Thu Apr 22, 2010 10:34 pm

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Thu Apr 22, 2010 10:38 pm

I like the beaches there, but I don't think most americans would consider them real beaches.

At least it isn't pretentious.
If it was, it would be in monaco.
Wait, do they even have cinemas there?

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Fri Apr 23, 2010 12:52 am

you're right.

Burning Man Sucks.

Don't Go.

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Fri Apr 23, 2010 3:03 am

http://www.visitmonaco.com/us/News/News ... -in-Monaco
http://www.visitmonaco.com/us/News/News ... -in-Monaco

buttrose · Post by **buttrose** » Fri Apr 23, 2010 5:07 am

* EU passport holders are not hassled at the border
* sycophants are an important part of the food chain, not a useless byproduct of something gone wrong
* the temporary art (the movies), leave no trace

Post by **Sham** » Fri Apr 23, 2010 5:44 am

buttrose wrote:* EU passport holders are not hassled at the border
* sycophants are an important part of the food chain, not a useless byproduct of something gone wrong
* the temporary art (the movies), leave no trace

Why didn't you mention these before? I could have avoided that sarcastic answer!

Fire_Moose · Post by **Fire_Moose** » Fri Apr 23, 2010 6:59 am

isnt Michael moore at Cannes?

/yuk

C.f.M. · Post by **C.f.M.** » Fri Apr 23, 2010 7:04 am

Captain Goddammit · Post by **Captain Goddammit** » Fri Apr 23, 2010 7:35 am

So, your priorities are fireworks shows, Paris Hilton, "class", and "long celebrated histories".

OK.

Post by **AntiM** » Fri Apr 23, 2010 7:43 am

Well, you don't have to wear underwear at either event...

I suppose Cannes doesn't engender endless bitterness from someone who got whiz on their Wheaties. Whatsa matter Rosie? Art grant get declined? MV didn't meet the requirements? No one wanted to see your lame ass fire spinning? Bad acid?

Ugly Dougly · Post by **Ugly Dougly** » Fri Apr 23, 2010 10:46 am

buttrose wrote: * people are mostly friendly, and speak a funny language

Sorry, I thought you were talking about Cannes, France. Was I mistaken???

In Black Rock City, you don't have to say "bonjour" in order to be treated like a human being.

C.f.M. · Post by **C.f.M.** » Fri Apr 23, 2010 10:49 am

I dunno, I think the cans are just fine AT Burning Man. Why chose?

Fire_Moose · Post by **Fire_Moose** » Fri Apr 23, 2010 12:53 pm

TITTIES!!!!!!!!!!!!

The reason everyone goes to burningman

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Fri Apr 23, 2010 3:50 pm

my Ph. is 6.3, so alkali if you stick a cucumber up my ass it will come out a dill pickle.

[youtube][/youtube]

you cant get that in cannes, their shits all bread and butter sweet relish bullcrap.

fucking frenchies, they think their fromage don't stink.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Fri Apr 23, 2010 7:14 pm

None of those reasons outweighs the chief disadvantage. In fact, all together they cannot outweigh the sheer horror of hanging out with the French.
I feel nausious just thinking about it.

buttrose wrote: * class is determined by your skill in obtaining a priority badge, not your skill in sucking off a member of the LLC

And this just makes me laugh. You think that the members you have to suck off in order to get a priority badge are any improvement?
Quell Buffon.

Isotopia · Post by **Isotopia** » Sat Apr 24, 2010 12:16 am

* doesn't actively practice censorship of criticism
* critical tits is discrete, sexy and doesn't mow over your personal experience
* temperate weather
* paris hilton camps at the du Cap, not in an impossible to reach RV
* class is determined by your skill in obtaining a priority badge, not your skill in sucking off a member of the LLC
* a real beach, not a playa
* when you order a double you get a quadruple
* better fireworks at the end of the festival
* people are mostly friendly, and speak a funny language
* more subjects to talk about with strangers than 'where are you from?'
* no DPW parade
* mini bar & room service
* celebrates entertainment and doesn't pretend that everyone should be a participant
* has a long celebrated history
* rituals are known bores, and are discouraged
* is a creative industry that doesn't pretend to be a movement
* cannot be described as a cult; you are free to skip a year without being ostracized as a malcontent
* all of your friends don't attend, so you can get distance from it in the off-season
* no spiritual nazis - nothing is sacred

Well then, the answer seems obvious.

Spend less time bitching here and more time prepping for your trip to fucking Cannes.

Now shooo... you little poseur.

buttrose · Post by **buttrose** » Sat Apr 24, 2010 8:44 am

* Douchebag Cat doesn't attend

buttrose · Post by **buttrose** » Sat Apr 24, 2010 8:47 am

* Hipster Kitteh failed to co-opt the lifestyle

buttrose · Post by **buttrose** » Sat Apr 24, 2010 9:00 am

* individuals don't seek to escape their own wealth and privilege by immersing themselves in the aesthetic of the working class

buttrose · Post by **buttrose** » Sat Apr 24, 2010 9:04 am

* participants need not be buried for cool to be reborn

buttrose · Post by **buttrose** » Sat Apr 24, 2010 9:05 am

* lack of individuality is discouraged

buttrose · Post by **buttrose** » Sat Apr 24, 2010 9:53 am

islatopium wrote:
>>> Now shooo... you little poseur.

how appropriately ironic. award: 50 hipster points.

anyone wearing the above statement on a Tshirt also earns 50 hipster points

anyone published to a blog wearing such Tshirt earns 500 hispter points.

hurry now to cafepress.com

dr.placebo · Post by **dr.placebo** » Sat Apr 24, 2010 10:00 am

I don't get it. Maybe it's a flaw in my character. When I have something that I don't like (right-wing tea parties come to mind) I stay away from the events, I eschew their lists, and mostly get on with a life made richer by their absence.

So what benefit do people get when they wallow in the heart of what they dislike? Do they have any objective they can reasonably attain? Or is it some masochistic narcissistic nihilistic delusional masturbatory act? When will the rhetorical questions stop?

C.f.M. · Post by **C.f.M.** » Sat Apr 24, 2010 10:14 am

Captain Goddammit · Post by **Captain Goddammit** » Sat Apr 24, 2010 10:16 am

Remember, we're talking about someone who gives a shit where Paris Hilton camps that is trying to tell us what's cool.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Sat Apr 24, 2010 10:37 am

Nailed, Dr. P.

I suspect an ugly break-up over the burn, being worked out by petty psychodrama.

C.f.M. · Post by **C.f.M.** » Sat Apr 24, 2010 10:40 am

What's so bad about "spiritual nazis," anyways?

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Sat Apr 24, 2010 11:54 am

Which position is the op advocating?
I'm having trouble telling.

I would note that france has significantly less dust.

And since Paris, the person, is having a child, I hear she is renovating her purse.

why the cannes film festival is better than burning man

why the cannes film festival is better than burning man

Re: why the cannes film festival is better than burning man

whats the difference between Sycophant and Psychophant? Ph.

Re: why the cannes film festival is better than burning man