What was the craziest/funniest thing you saw this year?

regynalonglank · Post by **regynalonglank** » Tue Sep 09, 2008 3:08 pm

ouch!

*that's my safe word. heh*

Mosin · Post by **Mosin** » Tue Sep 09, 2008 11:01 pm

willyloafofphora wrote:The funniest thing I saw was probably when two of my camp mates were having sex on top of our three story tower and some woman comes along wearing a badge. She makes them climb down and acts very serious and then gives them a citation for not using enough positions. Fucksake they were on top of a rickety tower made of old carports like 25' up in the air and she wants to see acrobatics.

That is some serious cockblock. Wow. And I thought my campmates Dan and Charlotte (names altered to protect guilty) were hardcore just slapping the side of our RV and shrieking in harmony "Kaaack Blaaaaaaahhhkkk!!" when they suspected carnal bidness....Jr. High schoolers got nuttin on 40-somethings. That really ups the bar.. on all fronts. 09 is gonna be rough.

DoriumLux · Post by **DoriumLux** » Tue Sep 09, 2008 11:50 pm

Isotopia wrote:Then there's the guy who was passed out along F(?) street near 7:00.

He was one drunk wookie. His camp buds pulled his pants down around his knees exposing his bare ass. The decided to see how many of those little theme camp zone marker flags they could stick in his ass.

By the time they were done his ass looked like plumage from a bird-of-paradise.

Oh god, that reminds of something that happened several years ago...

I had a drunk camp mate who is a long time burner come back to camp really late at night. He was really obliterated and I was eating mandarin oranges with chopsticks in the dark. He said something or another and I retorted that he could shove my chopsticks up his ass in a sarcastic fashion. He took it quite literally and lifted his sarong and proceeded to do so. I sat horrified and yet amused when a second camp mate wondered in and saw him amid the struggle of insertion. The camp mate proceeded to suggest other items to insert which included a long turkey feather, a spatula and so on. He was laying face down on the astro turf while we were crippled with laughter. His very, very tight laced wife who had never been to burning man eventually stormed out of the RV to find the reason for all the commotion that was keeping her awake. When she laid her eyes on her husband (who's butt looked like a cup holder at this point), she screamed "WTF! THAT"S GREAT J_____!!. JUST GREAT!!! REAL F****** MATURE J___!!!!!!!" and stormed back off to the RV in a raging fit.

I pretty much died of laughter that night. It's a memory I hold near and dear.

Mosin · Post by **Mosin** » Tue Sep 09, 2008 11:54 pm

<baloons> WE HAVE A WINNER!! <confetti>

That one kills. <snort>

Joshatdot · Post by **Joshatdot** » Wed Sep 10, 2008 4:02 am

LOLOLOL!! both of those stories are effing awesome!

jets · Post by **jets** » Wed Sep 10, 2008 12:10 pm

there was a guy in a giant wookie-type costume at the root society one night. a bunch of rangers tried to get him down from where he was - he was dancing on a small ledge in front of one of the speakers. as they scrambled around him, trying to lift him off the ledge, he just kept on dancing.
THAT was a funny thing to see.

willyloafofphora · Post by **willyloafofphora** » Wed Sep 10, 2008 6:04 pm

So my friends and I are sitting in the middle of this big thing in front of root society and we're all quite high. Some guy comes up to us and says " excuse me the vehicle is about to start moving, sorry but I have to ask you get off now." We're like "OK whatever" we start to grab our shit and get up and he says " just kidding its not really an art car you can sit back down. We fucking lost it we're still laughing at that shit he totally had us.

Intubater69 · Post by **Intubater69** » Thu Sep 11, 2008 8:26 am

Isotopia wrote:Then there's the guy who was passed out along F(?) street near 7:00.

He was one drunk wookie. His camp buds pulled his pants down around his knees exposing his bare ass. The decided to see how many of those little theme camp zone marker flags they could stick in his ass.

By the time they were done his ass looked like plumage from a bird-of-paradise.

I'm almost to scared to ask, where in his ass did they stick them?

unjonharley · Post by **unjonharley** » Thu Sep 11, 2008 8:49 am

keep yor winky covered

ZaphodBurner · Post by **ZaphodBurner** » Thu Sep 11, 2008 9:45 am

willyloafofphora wrote:The funniest thing I saw was probably when two of my camp mates were having sex on top of our three story tower and some woman comes along wearing a badge. She makes them climb down and acts very serious and then gives them a citation for not using enough positions. Fucksake they were on top of a rickety tower made of old carports like 25' up in the air and she wants to see acrobatics.

That wasn't the one out on 10 o'clock with the big laser dot from 2 o'clock on the tent, was it? If so, uh, they weren't the only one who enjoyed the, uh, view from the tower. *cough*

mars · Post by **mars** » Thu Sep 11, 2008 10:14 am

willyloafofphora wrote:
he says "just kidding it's not really an art car you can sit back down". We fucking lost it we're still laughing at that shit he totally had us.

That's great!!! LMAO!

dbfv101 · Post by **dbfv101** » Thu Sep 11, 2008 12:26 pm

Another great porta pottie was by the man on the 9:00 side. A girl came up and told me to go to the one that was closed off with Yellow Caution tape.

So I opened the door and the interior was decorated in a Hawaiian theme with grass skirts on the back wall and the seat had a really nice, plush fur cover. There was a rug on the floor, a nicely decorated mirror on the wall and toiletries (lotions, hand mirror, etc.) on the shelf next to the seat.
They used a greeting card on the door, so when it opened it kept playing "Taking Care of Business". It was hilarious!

snake · Post by **snake** » Thu Sep 11, 2008 1:45 pm

from an adjoining porta-potty a shout of "HEY, i got somebody else's glitter on my ass!!!'

willyloafofphora · Post by **willyloafofphora** » Fri Sep 12, 2008 12:47 pm

[quote="ZaphodBurner"][quote="willyloafofphora"]The funniest thing I saw was probably when two of my camp mates were having sex on top of our three story tower and some woman comes along wearing a badge. She makes them climb down and acts very serious and then gives them a citation for not using enough positions. Fucksake they were on top of a rickety tower made of old carports like 25' up in the air and she wants to see acrobatics.[/quote]

That wasn't the one out on 10 o'clock with the big laser dot from 2 o'clock on the tent, was it? If so, uh, they weren't the only one who enjoyed the, uh, view from the tower. *cough*[/quote]

nope 3:10 and F

Rev_Sysyphus · Post by **Rev_Sysyphus** » Fri Sep 12, 2008 1:07 pm

willyloafofphora wrote: nope 3:10 and F

We were in the big orange castle at 4:20 @ Fairlane. How did I miss this? I must have been out doing something somewhere! But then again the blocks were so freaking long that the distance from 4:20 & F to 3:10 & F was probably rather formidable.

Isotopia · Post by **Isotopia** » Fri Sep 12, 2008 5:00 pm

There was the guy with the lawnmower that had quite a few irate people ready to jump his ass because he felt the need to mow the playa. I don't think he was sober for a minute while at the event.

Twilight · Post by **Twilight** » Sat Sep 13, 2008 12:29 pm

Our camp's art car accommodates 80-100 people, and as it's a former aircraft loader, we can elevate them all 13' into the air. We had put it into the air for Temple Burn when a man and his young (three? four? five year old?) daughter walk by. He looks way up at the deck, sees that (almost) everyone's attention is on the Temple, looks down at the tires, unzips, and starts peeing on the tires.

However, one of our crew was on the ground and inquired what he was doing. He looked over and said "I'm just peeing on the tires." Perfectly acceptable behavior, right? I mean, it's not like he was peeing on the vehicle itself or anything, just the tires...

Our crewmember politely asked him to stop, which he grudgingly did. But then, the little daughter runs up and slugs our crew right in the leg, then stomps off in righteous indignation.

What can you do but stare dumbfoundedly?

Rev_Sysyphus · Post by **Rev_Sysyphus** » Sat Sep 13, 2008 12:33 pm

Twilight wrote: Our crewmember politely asked him to stop, which he grudgingly did. But then, the little daughter runs up and slugs our crew right in the leg, then stomps off in righteous indignation.

What can you do but stare dumbfoundedly?

Well at least he is teaching his kids to be as big a jerk as he is. Oh wait, that not a good thing.

Post by **AntiM** » Sat Sep 13, 2008 1:00 pm

Twilight wrote:Our camp's art car accommodates 80-100 people, and as it's a former aircraft loader, we can elevate them all 13' into the air. We had put it into the air for Temple Burn when a man and his young (three? four? five year old?) daughter walk by. He looks way up at the deck, sees that (almost) everyone's attention is on the Temple, looks down at the tires, unzips, and starts peeing on the tires.

However, one of our crew was on the ground and inquired what he was doing. He looked over and said "I'm just peeing on the tires." Perfectly acceptable behavior, right? I mean, it's not like he was peeing on the vehicle itself or anything, just the tires...

Our crewmember politely asked him to stop, which he grudgingly did. But then, the little daughter runs up and slugs our crew right in the leg, then stomps off in righteous indignation.

What can you do but stare dumbfoundedly?

A rainfall of piss from everyone 13 feet up?

mojo · Post by **mojo** » Sat Sep 13, 2008 2:00 pm

Isotopia wrote:There was the guy with the lawnmower that had quite a few irate people ready to jump his ass because he felt the need to mow the playa. I don't think he was sober for a minute while at the event.

This guy is the closest I have come in many years to being arrested for assault. I asked him nicely repeatedly to stop throwing dirt out of his mower all over my camp. (Which I had just finished uncovering from the Monday dust.) He ended up wearing some of the sorbet I was giving away.

CLARKcon · Post by **CLARKcon** » Sat Sep 13, 2008 2:08 pm

One of the funniest things I heard was when just laying down in the tent for bed. We were camped about 40 feet from the potties, and didn't mind the "plastic door *plinking*". It was fairly quiet, and I hear someone mumble and the door plink, and in obvious disgust (to a poo-poo platter maybe?), loudly expell "I mean, for FUCK SAKE! EVEN a 5 year old can FIND THEIR ASSHOLE!!" ...I laughed without breathing for about 30 seconds.

Intubater69 · Post by **Intubater69** » Sat Sep 13, 2008 8:01 pm

AntiM wrote:
Twilight wrote:Our camp's art car accommodates 80-100 people, and as it's a former aircraft loader, we can elevate them all 13' into the air. We had put it into the air for Temple Burn when a man and his young (three? four? five year old?) daughter walk by. He looks way up at the deck, sees that (almost) everyone's attention is on the Temple, looks down at the tires, unzips, and starts peeing on the tires.

However, one of our crew was on the ground and inquired what he was doing. He looked over and said "I'm just peeing on the tires." Perfectly acceptable behavior, right? I mean, it's not like he was peeing on the vehicle itself or anything, just the tires...

Our crewmember politely asked him to stop, which he grudgingly did. But then, the little daughter runs up and slugs our crew right in the leg, then stomps off in righteous indignation.

What can you do but stare dumbfoundedly?
A rainfall of piss from everyone 13 feet up?

Everybody needs a little Monty Python in their lives eh AntiM

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Sat Sep 13, 2008 8:13 pm

I can't believe no one dumped a drink on them!
What's gravity for anyway?

Dustdevil · Post by **Dustdevil** » Sat Sep 13, 2008 9:02 pm

We were camped directly across from the DPW Ghetto. I have camped near the Ghetto in the past and I was well aware of the noise and constant traffic in and out. We have a 30' flag pole with a blue airport strobe beacon on the top. Helps us find our way home at night. Tuesday night I was out late and when I got back to camp around 4:00 or so one of my camp mates said that someone from the DPW camp came over and was complaining about our strobe. We laughed it off as a joke. I say that because their camp had LOUD music playing, their flame cannon on the tower ran all night until the propane ran out and the lights on their stage were really bright. The next night a fellow from the DPW came over around 2:00am and asked how long I would be running the strobe for. I told him it is the only way that some of our people can find their way home, so we intended to run the light until we left the Playa. He said that it was so bright that sleep was impossible. He was not amused at my laughter. We offered him a frozen margarita, but he was serious. Their music must have been at 125db, the flame cannon running and the entire place was lit up like a Hollywood production, and he was complaining about my strobe? When we realized he was serious, I told him that if he could get the entire ghetto to turn off their lights and music, I would turn off my strobe. We didn't see any more of him. No doubt his first time on the Playa. BTW, it was one of our camp mates that was using the leaf blower to clean the carpets in the dust storm. We weren't actually cleaning, the dust was a gift to Dan Das Man and the American Steel Camp. We like to share.

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Sat Sep 13, 2008 9:35 pm

Was that the same one you had in 2007?
I was very near and barely noticed it.

Dustdevil · Post by **Dustdevil** » Sat Sep 13, 2008 9:39 pm

Same one. When standing below it, the intensity seem weak, but when you are further away and on a more even plain, it is bright. . It was easily visible from the Temple this year.

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Sat Sep 13, 2008 9:44 pm

I used it to find the camp sometimes coming off the playa.
It was still hard to spot with so much background chatter.

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Wed Sep 17, 2008 8:22 am

some family in reno.

Mom, Dad, two small kids, sitting on the ground at the bus station, obviously broke and waiting to return home, playing blackjack amongst themselves.

now THATS funny.

Fire_Moose · Post by **Fire_Moose** » Wed Sep 17, 2008 8:59 am

One of my funniest nights was later in the week, thurs or friday. Me and a couple camp mates were sitting around the burn barrel...absorbing it all. and these two people drop by, pausing their convo to say hi and such then going back to talking. Me and my friend were pretty much just listening to what they were saying until finally i told the guy "I see what you are saying, but what POINT are you trying to make" This completely trips him up and the woman begins to finish her thought. They went back and forth, adding as many "isms" into each sentence as possible. Everytime that i would disagree or ask a question about what they just said tripped them up and nothing came from it. Me and my friend went to bed and laughed amongst ourselfs about the dumbest conversation ever.....i wonder if that guy finally got laid or put up with all that nonsence for nothing

LonestarSam · Post by **LonestarSam** » Sat Sep 20, 2008 11:13 am

Did anyone see the old chevy artcar van with flames, horns and PA system? The guy would go around talking on an old school microphone from the driver's seat saying funny stuff. He was driving slowly around the 9 o' clock portal Monday morning (after the burn) asking people if for "breakfast items, pizza, or pancakes." Then he parked next to the porta potties and verbally harassed his friend who was inside taking care of business and gave commentary. I got part of it on video...had me laughing pretty hard.

What was the craziest/funniest thing you saw this year?

Porta pottie decor

Funny art car