Falling in love at burning man...

Share your pictures and video. Tell us about the sights, sounds, and scents, as well as the rumors and truths found at Burning Man.
lamdalu
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Falling in love at burning man...

Post by lamdalu » Tue Sep 02, 2008 12:12 pm

as the topic says, this year i fell in love at burning man. I've been close to marriage a number of times and have been in love (or so i thought) many times in my life. The story is beautiful, and i know that without BRC i wouldn't have found my soulmate.

On monday night this year my friend and i were out exploring on the Esplanade, when we saw the shimmering willow tree. We were traveling on our bikes and veered off to investigate this stimulating piece of art. We didn't have time to actually see it though because I saw a girl. Now im not usually a very confidant person when it comes to girls, but the energy i felt from her almost knocked me on my ass. I couldn't see her face but i knew that i had to call out to her, i had to chase her down at any cost lest i regret not doing so for the rest of my life. So i did. And i rode my bike harder through the soft playa than i ever did the whole week, and when i caught up to her she said her name was *******. unfortunately she was jumping on an art car and i couldn't just leave my bike so she gave me her camp address and a potato. I promptly forgot the address, anyone who knows me will understand that i my memory is very flawed. She blew me a kiss and that was the last time i thought i'd ever see her.

At this point i was kind of depressed about losing this girl and was ready to head back into camp.

the next day i was manning my bar at Camp Wannaburn and our job was to just call out to any group of people who walked by and have them come hang out. well this group of beautiful girls was walking by and i called out to them. they came over and i felt that energy again. unfortunately i didn't quite understand it still. I persevered though and started talking to this beautiful, intelligent girl who seemed very interested in talking to me. within five minutes she was telling me about a boy who had chased her the night before... at this point i understood the energy. i interrupted her and i asked her if her name was *****... she jumped into my arms and that was that. For the rest of burning man we were inseparable and our time together was the best i have ever had. within two days we had fallen in love, within 4 we knew that we were soul-mates. We were both terrified at first when we found out i was leaving a day earlier than she was, but then we realized that with true love, time and distance are illusions. We knew that in no time we'd be together again.

By the way, for those who were wondering, we didn't sleep together. We slept next to each other and talked, and kissed and fell in love. Sex was no object or objective for either of us, even though we could have the night we met.

Before burning man i didn't believe in love at first sight. I thought it was bullshit and that relationships had to be slowly built... I was dead wrong though. Love is a very powerful thing. That energy can break down your personal barriers and help you overcome so much. Before i met her i was an introverted young man who was scared of the world. I was about to give my life to the wrong woman. I had no confidence and i could never finish what i started. Her story is amazing and tragic and beautiful. It was her story that helped me realize my own potential. She is the light of my life. Thank you ******. I will never stop loving you with all my heart.

This was my first time at burning man, and i am hooked for life now. I will never really feel at home anywhere else, even in my own home in Nevada County, Ca.

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Gage
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Post by Gage » Tue Sep 02, 2008 1:40 pm

Love this story!!

We came to the Burn in love, but questioning certain aspects of our relationship. It took the playa to lift us up, break it all down, and then allow us to re-build it again.

We fell in love with each other again, and the buzz is still strong, even as I type this...

I hope more people felt this as well... If so, post it up! :)
Seeker & Creator of Present-Moment Magic

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betrdanevr
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Post by betrdanevr » Tue Sep 02, 2008 2:36 pm

Lamdalu,

Your story is without a doubt one of the most romantic ones I've ever heard.
but then we realized that with true love, time and distance are illusions. We knew that in no time we'd be together again.
Brings tears to my eyes. It'll happen for you . . . :)

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ZaphodBurner
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Post by ZaphodBurner » Tue Sep 02, 2008 4:07 pm

GageNdG wrote:Love this story!!

We came to the Burn in love, but questioning certain aspects of our relationship. It took the playa to lift us up, break it all down, and then allow us to re-build it again.

We fell in love with each other again, and the buzz is still strong, even as I type this...

I hope more people felt this as well... If so, post it up! :)
Very nicely stated.

In 2004 my wife wrote "Fear of Motherhood" in the Temple. But that was our first burn, and we wanted one more to "do it right," and then revisit the discussion. In 2005 we went to the BRCPO and addressed a card to "little one", who had not yet been conceived.

Our daughter was born in August of 2006 so we missed that year and 2007. In 2008, she spent the week with her grandparents and barely noticed we were gone. We addressed a card to our daughter from the BRCPO and marveled that the last time we were on the playa, her light had not yet shined upon us.

We shared a special, private moment of profound thanks at the magnificent temple this year and when we came home, our post-playa-depression was mitigated by our daughter rushing to the door to meet us. (saying "barackobama" which, honestly, she didn't learn from us. All of her grandparents are Republicans. I have NO IDEA...)

In a very real way, the temples and the people of Black Rock City not only changed our lives, but gave us the courage and conviction to create a new one.

Cheers.
-c
"The Red Baron is smart.. He never spends the whole night dancing and drinking root beer.. "-The WWI Flying Ace

Xavier
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Post by Xavier » Tue Sep 02, 2008 5:51 pm

Lamdalu, thank you for sharing your inspiring story.

I have taken six playa lovers over the seven years I've been, and one I married (and divorced), Two I've lost touch with and one passed away this year. While it was never love at first sight, in some cases it has definitely been strong, lifelong platonic friendship and that shouldn't be forgotten.

For others who are wondering if it's possible, yes it is, and you should you enjoy it while it lasts. :D

lamdalu
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Post by lamdalu » Tue Sep 02, 2008 5:57 pm

you are all so beautiful. I may be young (21) but this experience, this new life i created for myself in BRC has made me wiser and more compassionate. I believe in myself and in love and in people. You are all beautiful. If anyone comes to grass valley or nevada city in northern california you will always have a place to stay.


i love you all very much.

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Post by skygod » Wed Sep 03, 2008 7:00 pm

A beautiful girl from Washington sat down next to me at the Sat burn and just started talking metaphysics out of the blue. Her name was "Cloud" and she was an "aeriel dancer" fer crissake.
I'm in love.
I hope she emails me!
"It will seem difficult in the beginning. But everything seems difficult in the beginning."- Musashi

Samsa Bee
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Post by Samsa Bee » Fri Sep 05, 2008 9:32 am

I fall in love at Burning Man every year pretty much. This year it was to a married man whos wife was at home. Im married, too, with my hubbie at home. We were playa buddies, no touchie.....but I still fell in love with him. It was amazing. We watched the man fall together and hugged. We watched sunrises together.

Your story is wonderful!! I fell in love with my husband at first sight, instantly, august 98 at GUESS WHERE: Mad Dogs and Englishmen Pub in Nevada City, CA. Our hometown. The default world has magic, too. Nevada County is full of magic. Its great to be here. Were 4 hours away from Black Rock and very lucky to have the burner spirit surround us.

Heres to love !!! :D
~8~ buzzzzzzzzzz

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Post by Karlene » Tue Nov 10, 2009 3:23 pm

OK, love story. 2009 was my 9th Burn, always go with my brother, sister in law and a few friends. As I am a hermit by nature and don't easily saddle up to men, I've met a lot of guys out there, but nothing ever happened, I feel confident in my appearance and personality etc, but one must be open to be approached, and I am definitely not open. I don't go there to meet men and get laid, I go for other reasons. So this year, we set up at 4:30 and Lineage, nice camp we always set up, and we always have a lot of passers by stopping in for a cold one or a meal . I started noticing this guy in camp occasionally, he was wearing red gloves. Occasionally, as I was handing out sandwiches or meals to guests, I would see these red gloves. Finally, on Friday afternoon he comes into the main tent where I was inhaling stuff out of a balloon and he has some mushroom truffles in his hand and he says, Would you like to eat a truffle and go out riding with me tonight, he held them up like an offering, like some kind of communion offering. I said sure, come for dinner and we'll go out after. On the spot, he's there for dinner, He was camped out in walk in, really close to us. Down go the truffles and off we ride. In an hour we were laughing so hard, having a great time and I was feeling very comfortable. We went back to camp and I made some tea and he went to his camp and me to my tent. When I woke up the next morning I felt kind of antsy, kind of jittery, I couldn't figure out what was wrong with me. I was making breakfast for the camp and I found myself looking out at his tent often, waiting for him to come over for breakfast, as he did. That day we rode over to the airport and sat on a bench watching planes land and take off, and I knew then I was screwed, or was going to be that night. The energy was SO fricking strong. Well, one thing led to another and then he had to go back to the east coast where he lives. To make a long story short, I'm just back from spending a week with him back there and I am definitely in love. When it hits you just CANNOT fight it. I hadn't had sex for 7 years before I met him and I went to his tent with him like a little sheep following along. He's a fine man, a wonderful person and what ever happenes here, he will always be my friend. I'm in love for the first time in a very long time and I feel GREAT!!!!!

That's a Burning Man love story....it IS possible....

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ibdave
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Post by ibdave » Tue Nov 10, 2009 6:40 pm

Karlene,
Very cool story.... Very cool.... 8) 8) 8)
I was Born OK the 1st Time....

Don't bring defaultia to Burning Man, take Burning Man to defaultia...... graidawg

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lambert13
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Re: Falling in love at burning man...

Post by lambert13 » Wed Nov 11, 2009 5:33 am

lamdalu wrote: Before burning man i didn't believe in love at first sight. I thought it was bullshit and that relationships had to be slowly built... I was dead wrong though.
I feel the same way my friend.

I met my wife through an online dating site. Sure, there are tons of creeps and weirdos on those sites. Yes, even on the women's side of the fence. When I saw the tiny photo of the woman who would later become my wife I was floored. My eyes watered up. I started smiling uncontrollably. I knew it was her, the one that was meant for me.

We started talking and that sealed the deal. Hell, I could have married her right then and there. I probably should have. But all things in time and here we are 5 years later happily married, still so so so in love and a little bundle of joy on the way.


So many posts on this thread are beautiful. Love is a wonderful thing and I love hearing about others experiences.
It's pointless to walk when it's past time to run.

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Blompson
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Post by Blompson » Fri Nov 13, 2009 10:21 am

i ran into a girl i knew from the default world. when i knew her best, she was dating a close friend of mine, but i had a secret crush on her..

we were both dancing at a thunderdome after party when suddenly the crowd parted and we saw each other. both of our jaws dropped and we ran to embrace. once we left thunderdome, we went exploring the city, rapidly discovering deeper levels on which we were the same. we danced, drank, played, and interacted with our environment, holding hands through everything (often handcuffed together). we fell asleep watching the stars from a trampoline. when we woke up (near sunrise) we headed back toward my camp. her feet had started hurting (from high heeled boots) so i carried her from the porta potties back to my bed.

the next day, in the temple, i wrote her a message.. i was so full of emotion from the temple and all i could think about was how amazing the night we spent together was..
"R, I've wanted you since the day i met you. I'm so glad i found you here.. -L"

when i saw her again that night, she told me she had found the message and felt the exact same way. we spent the rest of the week together, sharing and doing everything together.

we are now lovers in the default world.

we hope to tour black rock city together on stilts next year. :D

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RedHeaven
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Post by RedHeaven » Wed Nov 18, 2009 3:46 pm

Wow what an amazing story!!!! LOVE IT......goodness that is truly awesome.

Hey I live in Nevada Co. GV as well. Been here for years. It's my homiest home of all, BMan a close second after Quincy, land of High Sierra Fest. I totally believe in love at first sight. My husband and I are proof: 11 years! Cheers!

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ygmir
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Post by ygmir » Wed Nov 18, 2009 6:25 pm

you just gotta love us sillies from Nevada County.........
YGMIR

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pandasex
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Post by pandasex » Sun Nov 22, 2009 4:40 pm

Great stuff there. Words cannot describe the empathy i felt while reading the beauty and gravity of that kind of LOVE. I do not think i have ever encountered that. I am very happy for you.
I have post playa depression :(

buckycat
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Post by buckycat » Mon Nov 23, 2009 1:39 pm

Dear Playaboy Advisor: I never thought it would happen to me....

My first Burn was in 2004. I was a few months out of my latest medium-to-long term relationship. As before, I simply didn't want to get married, and in the end I wanted out. At 35 years old, I was feeling like I needed to face the fact that "the one" for me did not exist; that at my core, I needed to be honest with myself and anyone who I got involved with: I simply did not want to share the rest of my life with a partner. "Serial Monogamist" is the applicable term.

I remember reading an Onion editorial headline around that time, the byline photo a smug yuppie a-hole, something like "I Promise to Love and Cherish You Forever (for Four to Six Years)." Ouch, that sure hit home.

Camp during my virgin year had about 20 people in it. Most of them I did not know. One fellow virgin-burner campmate caught my eye. She and I went to some other camp to play Scrabble. We rode bikes around, pinging our bells at each other. It sure seemed like she was flirting back.

On a late-night playa stroll, the atmosphere whirring with flashes and trails, I quizzed her extensively on her views on pop culture, religion, family, relationships. She passed with flying colors. (Though she gave the Grateful Dead the thumbs up, I let that one slide.) Synchronicities abounded. She kept being nice to me.

I went with her to see the Temple for the first time, thinking it would probably be the cheesiest part of Burningman, braced for some type of patchouli-scented drum-circle-jerk. Turns out, that first Temple visit hit me like a ton of bricks, 180 degrees different than what I expected. I cried like a baby, thinking about the stories of loss she had told me the night before, my folks, failed relationships, blah blah blah.

My head swam with intensity, comfort, desire, uncertainty. A mutual friend orchestrated our first kiss after a rambunctious Critical Tits. My ride home agreed to stay an extra night so that my new friend and I could awkwardly heavy-pet and get somewhere between first and third base. I left BRC hoping that this wasn't just a flash in the pan, wondering when to call her, hypothesizing what she looked like without all that dust on her.

Long story short, we got married 3 months later. She's my best friend and my wife, I can't imagine NOT being with her till I die, and now she and I organize our camp. So for all the Haters I got no choice but to say kill that noise, playa love changed my life and is NO GODDAMN JOKE!

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ibdave
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Post by ibdave » Tue Nov 24, 2009 9:04 pm

Awesome..... 8) 8) 8)
I was Born OK the 1st Time....

Don't bring defaultia to Burning Man, take Burning Man to defaultia...... graidawg

Karlene
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Post by Karlene » Tue Dec 08, 2009 11:26 am

It all boils down to meeting the right person, and they can be met at the burn just as well as anywhere. If only we could live there all year long and bullshit default world issues didn't have to be involved. My issue with my friend is that he lives on the east coast and I live in California, and even more separating, I'm 63 and he's 39. It didn't make any difference at the burn, why should it make any difference here. If it was the other way around, nobody would think twice about it. I've been called a coyote, which I find REALLY insulting, because I am not interested in anybody because of their age. My last relationship, 10 years ago was with a man 19 years OLDER than me. It's the spirit of the person's heart that I see, the whole spiritual person. I knew back here in this world there would be issues with the age thing. I look younger than my years and have a very young attitude about life. I think older women are just not valued in this society, it's sad because older women have raised the families, worked, educated themselves, taken care of numerous people and they are WISE. It sucks.....

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Post by pinemom » Fri Dec 11, 2009 8:42 am

Wow...how'd I miss this thread????

Wasnt there a simular thread? I dont wanna be redundant! I think I have shared how Titwi and Pinemom came to be?
Names pinemom, but my friends call me "Piney".

Karlene
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Post by Karlene » Fri Dec 11, 2009 9:16 am

I haven't seen that. Tell me how it came to be.

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Ugly Dougly
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Post by Ugly Dougly » Fri Dec 11, 2009 9:57 am

Must be nice.

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Post by Shazzlee36 » Thu Jan 07, 2010 1:42 pm

It will be first burning man this year and I am so excited. This thread has almost had me in tears. I loved reading all your stories and wish you all happiness. I so can't wait to be apart of everything BM and the people have to offer.

I guess everyone takes something out of BM I am not sure what mine will be yet but am excited just by the thought

xx

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pinemom
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Post by pinemom » Fri Jan 08, 2010 8:00 am

pinemom wrote:Wow...how'd I miss this thread????

Wasnt there a simular thread? I dont wanna be redundant! I think I have shared how Titwi and Pinemom came to be?
Met in default via this website..... camped together in 2006, he proposed on wed. 2006 we got married on the playa thur2007.
Built a theme camp in 2007, been burninglove ever since....
Names pinemom, but my friends call me "Piney".

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Fire_Moose
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Post by Fire_Moose » Fri Jan 08, 2010 9:06 am

" I think older women are just not valued in this society, it's sad because older women have raised the families, worked, educated themselves, taken care of numerous people and they are WISE. It sucks....."


so in other words....older women have played their part and are no longer useful. I like the way you think.





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Dr Helix
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Post by Dr Helix » Fri Jan 08, 2010 9:07 am

I actually thought I would never fall in love. Then I went to my first burn in 2008. Was overwhelmed with all the great things that were happening around me. Out late with friends and that is when I saw her. This spirit just dancing, dancing dancing. There were some other guys trying to dance with her but she looked at me and I her and bam! We worked our way toward each other and wordlessly we knew we wanted to know more and be together. The whole week was a dream for me. On the night of the Burn though, she didn't show up to meet me as we had planned. Went to her camp. "We don't know where she is" they said. I tore around the entire Burn looking for her. Nothing. I was bereft. "Let her go" I thought. "At least you now know what being in love was supposed to feel like". Sunday Morning, breaking down and everyone's pushing to go. Still she's a no show and I am lower than low. But during the week she had left her tools in my Art Car. I debated it for a bit but decided I would at least drop them off. "If she doesn't want to see me", I thought, "At least I'll know." So I sent the rest ahead and said I'd catch up. Drove over to her camp and there she was. She saw me, dropped all her stuff and jumped into my arms! Covering me kisses she explained; she had had to take care of her cousin that day who was a bit over the top with the dust from the windstorm that day and a knee injury. She had been in her trailer the whole time I was in her camp but hadn't heard them call out for her. She figured I was mad at her for not making our meeting and had left!!!! Oh the joy of that reunion.....As we exchanged info I kissed her one more time and said I love you. "I love you too" she said, and as I left she danced along side my truck waving and crying........

Postscript. That was 08. We are still madly in love and returned to the Burn in 09. The miles seperate us (She lives in Canada, me in California) but we see each other often and talk every day. We will return to the Burn in 10, but one day we we will be togther always every day. At the age of 53, I am in love for the first time in my life. Thank you Burning Man. Thank you.
"Love, Rockets and write when you get work"

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pinemom
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Post by pinemom » Fri Jan 08, 2010 9:19 am

Thank you Dr. Helix

joy overflow'eth!
namaste to you and your lover....soon!
Names pinemom, but my friends call me "Piney".

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Ugly Dougly
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Post by Ugly Dougly » Fri Jan 08, 2010 10:26 am

It's like falling in love anywhere, except its weirder and windier.

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Dr Helix
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Post by Dr Helix » Fri Jan 08, 2010 10:54 am

The funny thing is, I always considered myself a romantic and assumed true love would find me sooner rather than later. And I did have good relationships, a good marriage, fine kids. But through all of that, I never really felt the pull of passionate absolutely, where have you been all my life?, you're the one for me, love love love love, crazy love till that moment in time. Hell, maybe it is the wind and the wierdness. Don't care really. It happened there and there is where I will return to say thanks again for letting us find each other.
"Love, Rockets and write when you get work"

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Victorian
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Post by Victorian » Thu Jan 14, 2010 4:56 pm

These are all beautiful. They are all the reasons I am going.
I'm a virgin. I've said my hellos on the e-playa. Looking to soak up knowledge and gain understanding and tollerance before I head out to the esplanade. First time trip, planning myself, hoping to find a playa parent before I head out that I may camp nearby to stay safe if needed....

Anyways, point to the story,

I've already met my soul mate, I am one of the lucky few. We're polar opposites, but it works for us. He isn't burning material. He and I both know and understand this. We do have a trusting relationship... but with him staying home this year, and myself going into this unknown, I do have a small fear that I may meet another. I would always rely faithful, that is not the trouble, but I worry that I too, may find a playa partner, someone I conntect with on a deeper level... or may I become so jaded that I do not know up from down, and the burning dust might tell me love is lust....


I have read the relationship advice, and heard words of wisdom from many. But for the sake of my "reality" or home world back here, and the other 350 days I am NOT on the playa.. and this does happen to occur... What advise might you vets have for a young female headed to the playa?

Please, no snorts or chorttles, I want you to understand, this is strictly mind, heart and soul... No body (no sex that I'm referring to)

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Marscrumbs
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Post by Marscrumbs » Thu Jan 14, 2010 5:05 pm

Fall in love on the playa? I guess it could happen. It's more likely if it's your fiancee going alone while you stay at home (guaranteed). Else it like buying a single big lotto ticket.(Save your money.)

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