top douche bags fucktards at BM 2010

[tamarakay]

I'm a newbie too so i'm just going from what i've read, but it seems if you don't camp near the larger sound camps or near center camp you have a better chance of not getting caught up near a bunch of sparkle pony raver types. It also seems to me that the last few streets would be overrun with them as from what i've read the "weekenders" coming in the final few days make camp there. Also when you set up, be respectful of those already there, but don't leave TOO much room or latecomers try and squeeze in and what you thought was your buffer zone becomes someone's camp.

As always, i'm sure some vets will jump on and correct me if i'm wrong

[AntiM]

That's about right. But douchebags come in all flavors, so you never know. I mean, really, who chooses to set up a bar with a DJ and dance floor across from Hushville???

[Savannah]

While sobering, I'm reading these to not be an asshat my first time this year. Just bought my ticket today and can't get to sleep... almost 5 am. What's a generally low-douche-baggery place to set up?

When possible, I like to camp on the outer streets because they're quieter, about a block from the bathrooms. Avoid 10pm and 2pm near the large raves. Watch out for fancy-looking places with stages. Talk to your neighbors before you begin setup, whenever possible.

Don't take this thread too seriously. A first-timer could easily think the Burn is overrun with total bastards. It's not. But when you do meet one, it's a drag, because there is a higher degree of happiness and kindness afoot than in the default world . . . so jerks tend to stand out, in their special brand of Whatthefuckery.

[illy dilly]

It also seems to me that the last few streets would be overrun with them as from what i've read the "weekenders" coming in the final few days make camp there. Also when you set up, be respectful of those already there, but don't leave TOO much room or latecomers try and squeeze in and what you thought was your buffer zone becomes someone's camp.

Tamara, you are totally right about not leaving too much space! A small group of weekenders can sneak their little Geo Metro, 4 lawn chairs and two person dome tent right in while your not looking. Then once they are there, they'll realize that you have a pretty sweet setup and all the supplies to survive. They're sorta like leeches, if you're not paying attention the sneak up your legs and before long their sucking you dry.

Last year we woke up one day, and someone had pitched their tent right in front of the main door into our shade structure. It was sorta like "who the hell are you and why are you in my doorway?"
Our plan this year is to make a little white picket fence type deal to put around our camp. Then put some rope between the cars in the back, try to keep people from wandering in through the back of our camp.

[Dr. Pyro]

Illy, how the hell did that happen last year? You were in BDV and we stake out everybody's space! You should have let me or Felony know so we could 1) kick their asses out of the Village; and 2) confiscate all of their beer. Not necessarily in that order.

[theCryptofishist]

D-baggery is a matter of interaction, not placement. Just ask the people around your prospective spot and see what they say and how they say it.
Be wary of tricksters, because that's the art of a lot of participants.

[illy dilly]

Illy, how the hell did that happen last year? You were in BDV and we stake out everybody's space! You should have let me or Felony know so we could 1) kick their asses out of the Village; and 2) confiscate all of their beer. Not necessarily in that order.

Yeah, I wasn't sure. Cause it seemed like on Wednesday all sorts of folks showed up randomly.
If you remember where we were camped, and how our camp was set up, somebody just through up their dome tent right between our shade structure and the camper trailer that was sorta in front of us. I wasn't sure if they should be there or not.
Do you remember how Drew was gonna bring that super tall pole with the time lapse camera then ended up having some trouble and wasn't able to get it there. Some folks moved into that whole 50' space that was gonna be used for the pole and guy lines. I figured if a whole camp moved in that wasn't supposed to be there you or Felony and especially Frost woulda noticed.
The whole map got a little screwy even when we arrived Monday afternoon. So I figured it was a change of plans. But the way they snuck in under the cover of darkness was not soo cool.

And I'm not one to go rocking the boat.

I'm just saying if you're not careful, folks will randomly show up and move in- and then you might not be able to control what douche bag pops up.
Our first year we were all set up, went to party Monday night, when the sun came up there was a super gigantic rental RV (even bigger than yours Doc, and your RV is huge!). It was all good cause those people were super cool, and explained that really late Monday night, they had to park the damn thing someplace cause it was getting dangerous with all the wasted folks running around. They asked if we wanted them to move it, 90% of the reason it was ok, is that they asked.

Fishy, I totally agree. You make your own burn! But, you do also need to take some precautions to protect yourself from the rare folks that make their own burn by screwing with you.
Something my grandpa taught me was "your best security system is a friendly and close neighborhood" His idea was that everyone on the street or in the neighborhood looks out for each other, and everyone is more secure because of it.

[gyre]

The rules about not taking space you aren't using are much more strictly enforced now.
So don't be surprized by that.

On the other hand, it's routine for someone to try to park a 50 foot Rv in a theme camp on the esplanade on friday night.

[OatmealMama]

I was a newbie 2:00'er in 2010 -- and all I heard was "FUCK FUCK FUCK" screamed at me from 8AM on.

Not that I'm complaining or anything. I'd rather wake up to hearing "FUCK FUCK FUCK" screamed by some idiot with a megaphone than waking up in the default world.

Wah!

2:00/K(yoto) is great...stay on the outter edges. Say whatzup to Coyote. We were the ones with the two vans that gave him a shit load of water and ice when we left.

[Bluemandrew]

Illy, how the hell did that happen last year? You were in BDV and we stake out everybody's space! You should have let me or Felony know so we could 1) kick their asses out of the Village; and 2) confiscate all of their beer. Not necessarily in that order.

Yeah, I wasn't sure. Cause it seemed like on Wednesday all sorts of folks showed up randomly.
If you remember where we were camped, and how our camp was set up, somebody just through up their dome tent right between our shade structure and the camper trailer that was sorta in front of us. I wasn't sure if they should be there or not.
Do you remember how Drew was gonna bring that super tall pole with the time lapse camera then ended up having some trouble and wasn't able to get it there. Some folks moved into that whole 50' space that was gonna be used for the pole and guy lines. I figured if a whole camp moved in that wasn't supposed to be there you or Felony and especially Frost woulda noticed.
The whole map got a little screwy even when we arrived Monday afternoon. So I figured it was a change of plans. But the way they snuck in under the cover of darkness was not soo cool.

A few of us tried to figure out wtf to do with them, but it was a giant space we weren't ever going to use. We didn't have much argument for making them pack everything back up and move. They did stop me from being able to use my little fire bucket though, that was kind of annoying

[LanceThruster]

Pretty informative list. Other than a few comments from the petty and easily annoyed, I thought most of the gripes were legit and establishes beyond a doubt that you can let your hair down w/o being a jerk.

[AntiM]

Hehehe, perhaps the spammer hawking designer bags here a moment ago would qualify as a Douchey de Baggette.

[A Jester]

Here is my list of biggest assholes at BM 2010


Costco bar dumbass with shaking hand who didn't understand the laws regarding how not to get busted serving minors.


Beggars standing by will call looking for cheap tickets. Do some grunt labor and earn one, maggot.

It's official: Shakes will be back! I wonder how many beggars there will be this year.

[BBadger]

Hehehe, perhaps the spammer hawking designer bags here a moment ago would qualify as a Douchey de Baggette.

Hmm, a French douche bag... I translated "douche bag" on Babelfish and got: sac de douche.

[AntiM]

Touche.

[$tormy]

This is a great therapeutic thread for me. It is very reassuring to know that I am not the only porch light that the douche bugs are attracted to. Should we set up the Department of Douche-bag Decontamination (DDD)? Triple D.... kind of has a nice feel ... I mean sound to it. Decontamination could come in the form of mandatory relocation to somewhere past 12:00 with no porta potties. Decontamination could be considered complete and reintegration could occur upon completion of the collection of 1 large bag of MOOP or some other valuable volunteer effort to prove humanity exists in said dysfunctional douche-bag carcass. Thoughts?

[AntiM]

Make them meet out at the trash fence....

[moonrise]

yea, ticket beggars, I ponder bringing mock up tickets pre-soaked with fuel, then just as you're about to hand it to one of them, light it on fire and watch their free loading face hit the floor....hehehe....thoughts anyone? har har

[lucky420]

just be sure they know to "stop, drop, and roll" and you should be good.

[atomicray]

Greetings all!

New to the forums and this thread has been an interesting read

I gotta say, my hesitations about going to BM and turning down all those invites I have been getting since '91...I never went due to lack of funds, being stationed (military) where I could not get away long enough, or those basic reasons...those are what I am dealing with again..and I thought they were gone.

I am 46 and in my early years I was forced...I say forced because it would have never been my choice...to live as a child of '60s hippie gypsies.

So the most of the varied subjects that this rather long thread have touched on strike me a bit curious.

Having had cigarettes, alcohol, and pot offered by my parents and their like minded '60s hippie gypsies (which shall further be referred to as roaches) since I was in grade school...I do not find the same appreciation for those three subjects/items...I never smoked either but I did drink, having to change schools in the 4th and the 5th grade for being drunk at school tends to make things hot at home...moving 3-4 times a year, every year...so I tend to keep a distance from all three...which makes being in crowds of people partaking of the same a bit tough for the home team.

The deodorant/antiperspirant issue is interesting. As one would guess, the natural smells of unkempt humans were popular with the roaches. I gotta tell you at least for me I appreciate the personal smell of the skin and various aroma locations of my wife, but that is it...honestly I do not appreciate the general chromatic chemosensor stimuli din that tend rises up from the various cracks, pits, and surfaces that an intrusion of roaches can generate. So if asked, I am not on board for the general stink that comes from unwashed bodies or unchecked body odors. If this is a chain I must carry then I am ok with that. I happen to like many varieties of perfumes, incense (except patchouli which causes a severe reaction of anger on my part...having all my clothes stink of it up until high school tends to do that), and other smell good aspects of modern culture that are not popular with some others apparently...most flowers and fruit naturally smell good...most people do not.

The one exception would be the aforementioned hoo hoo and needing to purge with chemicals...I would say only in situations that require action beyond everyday hygiene, wavering on medical attention that this should be used...but people are people, some folks have naturally bad breath and others have other issues...but from personal experience, the basics of bathing is enough...the idea of constantly flushing with various fluids seems a bit extreme.

And speaking of douche bags and roaches...I find that the stories of these POS are bumming me out.

Having spent a great deal of my working as and with artists of various disciplines I can honestly say that for the most part artists have some serious issues with other people, the world as a whole, and a wide variety of things in between. I think we are all a bit eccentric but most folks rarely get the opportunity to show it...but artists, we are expected to show it...that is what it is to create...an expression of what an artist sees or feels. This tends to also develop into other issues...questioning, speaking, up/out, breaking things, etc.

The idea of Burning Man has always intrigued me...a collection of people...regular people, artists, craftsmen, etc...coming together to build something unique and collective, just to enjoy the process...then see it reduced to so much ash and dust. There is something pure in that exercise.

But somehow the ideal of this has become something else, as it would seem to an outsider looking, reading, or googling in anyway.

Being a Birgin myself I have trepidations...

I have plans, a commissioned budget, and interest to carry me through...but to be honest I just do not have the desire to have a "top douche bag list from my Burning Man event experience" series of stories.

I have already been corrected in my thinking that it was all bikini/fur boots, painted naked bodies, and more dead Long Island Whitefish then you could imagine...thankfully this is just the small "wooooo" percentage that gets photo coverage.

The idea of my mutant vehicle being stolen or tagged kinda pisses me off.

The thought of drunk/high roaches climbing on art installations because they want to, regardless of if it was ment or designed for climbing pretty much makes me less than interested in the project...having to build in special considerations to account for the worst case situation of "wooooo" takes away from the design.

And the final WTF is the begging. Wlie buskers can be fun if they are not pushy, I have had the joyful experience of dealing with begging from various grades of panhandlers from the streets of Manhattan, New Orleans, Key West, Chicago, etc...by joyful I mean to say life sucking...I pretty much despise begging.

I can handle, ignore, and otherwise bypass all the prior issues...as they are mine to bare...but the begging, that would cause me some high degree of irritation.

If I bring water or food without the intent to sell, swap, or share...meaning enough for myself and mine...then it would be a serious breach of the social contract to beg.

If you are a young kid, old, infirm, heavy with child, or in some other way in a condition that required attention and support...then I would give it...but don't beg.

Maybe it is just me...but going into the deep, dry, and toxic desert without the means, ability, or desire to take care of yourself then why does it fall on me to support the beggers and roaches?

Why on Earth would someone thrust themselves into the toxic dry desert without any resources? No ride. No money. No water. No food. No thing...nothing? Really? And in the end how much begging are we talking about?

*****

Yes there is a deep streak of conservative running through me. But not so much that I can not appreciate what the fundamentals of the Burning Man project represents.

It does seem that the current vibe is nearing a spring break situation...lots of tits and ass, drinking and wooooo, and worst of all roving clusters of belligerent roaches looking for handouts.

I will have to just go to the next one and see for myself if it is worth investing my time and effort to get involved.

Thanks in advance for any advice.

Have a great week everyone.

Atomic Ray

[AntiM]

You'll feel better with boots in the dust. This is just bitching about the worst of the worst, a small percentage of the population, and our experiences. There's far more good than bad. But this is like a scab, and we're those snot nosed kids who can't stop picking at it.

Revisit the thread after the burn.

[Eric]

The thought of drunk/high roaches climbing on art installations because they want to, regardless of if it was ment or designed for climbing pretty much makes me less than interested in the project...having to build in special considerations to account for the worst case situation of "wooooo" takes away from the design.

If it's climbable, or even looks potentially climbable, it will get climbed. Period. Burning Man isn't a museum, and people like to get up close & personal with the art; it's part of that whole "interactivity" thing. There's a reason most pieces out there are built strong enough to survive the zombie hordes- it's the one place on earth you're guaranteed the zombie hordes will come. As for whether or not thats a good thing... depends on who you ask. I only rarely climb things, generally the ones I do have stairs. One of my camp-mates will scramble up any surface that looks like he can get his boots on it.

It does seem that the current vibe is nearing a spring break situation...lots of tits and ass, drinking and wooooo, and worst of all roving clusters of belligerent roaches looking for handouts.

Like AntiM said- wait until you get boots to dust before you decide what the current vibe is. It truly is something you have to experience to understand, and not in a crazy spiritual sort of way but in a "holy shit, what's that" sort of way.

[atomicray]

The thought of drunk/high roaches climbing on art installations because they want to, regardless of if it was ment or designed for climbing pretty much makes me less than interested in the project...having to build in special considerations to account for the worst case situation of "wooooo" takes away from the design.

If it's climbable, or even looks potentially climbable, it will get climbed. Period. Burning Man isn't a museum, and people like to get up close & personal with the art; it's part of that whole "interactivity" thing. There's a reason most pieces out there are built strong enough to survive the zombie hordes- it's the one place on earth you're guaranteed the zombie hordes will come. As for whether or not thats a good thing... depends on who you ask. I only rarely climb things, generally the ones I do have stairs. One of my camp-mates will scramble up any surface that looks like he can get his boots on it.

It does seem that the current vibe is nearing a spring break situation...lots of tits and ass, drinking and wooooo, and worst of all roving clusters of belligerent roaches looking for handouts.

Like AntiM said- wait until you get boots to dust before you decide what the current vibe is. It truly is something you have to experience to understand, and not in a crazy spiritual sort of way but in a "holy shit, what's that" sort of way.

Thanks...that is what I suspected was the right answer. Just jump in with our mutant vehicle and check it out.

The climbing on art installations, especially those not meant for climbing does strike me odd...oh I have seen it before...just try being downtown in New Orleans for Rex or being part of a float krewe and not have to deal with roaches climbing up anything and everything...though if you are brazen enough to climb onto a moving float in New Orleans during the parade, then you will have a great story of how you were beat down and thrown off the float (not my desired evening of fun, but we had several assaults on our lady friends by drunk roaches...now if a person climbs on board without invite, let us just say that a small ball pein hammer to the hand tends to make people let go real quick)...I have many many stories, after 27+ parades in N'Orleans, and the most prevalent theme is "you should have seen what this dipshit did..."...but there were some great floats (artistic effort), really fun mask balls afterwards, and the smaller parades (avoid downtown at all costs...unless getting puked on, punched for .75c worth of beads, or hit with a beer bottle sounds exciting) were almost always 100% fun...the off day parades leading up to the main event have just as much color, sound, and life as the large ones; just not as many drunks and roaches.

So with many a Mardi Gras and Fantasy Fest (interesting enough...not one bad memory of Fantasy Fest in Key West...and there were MANY drunks and roaches...they just seem nicer there for some reason...mostly the drunks fall over and get scooted to the side) under my belt, I have seen what great throngs of wild asses can produce.

The art installations...let us say my installation is accepted and is built...then what happens?

I would assume that I could also provide a small krewe (N'Orleans for group or club) right nearby so I could watch over the big baby?

There is apparently much more to be researched...thankfully I am not expected to make a decision about building until mid 2012.

For some reason I had thought I would have some measure of control over the piece. The idea that a guy could just walk up and start climbing without even a "hey can I?" just baffles me. I suspect I was be nonplussed and bordering on cheesed* off...my 25+yrs of martial training may take over at that point, and I am not your average peace loving hugger type...I can appreciate many things but climbing on my car, my house, my wife, or my art would most likely create a situation.

Is it expected and there for allowed to climb on anything? Is this part of the BMSocial contract..."I have the right to climb anywhere, anytime, anyplace"?

I was cruising through a series of really nice photos of previous art pieces, some truly spectacular and interesting sculpture to be sure, and I saw several that I would not have considered safe by any measure (Capt Conservative kicking in, 23+yrs of being an OSHA inspector tends to leave a be careful safety tattoo on you) and beyond that some of these art pieces did not look all that climbable...which is the challenge I suspect, but that is not the point is it?

Are the installations there to challenge the various members of the mob to mount the art?

Now I am 100% for having art installations that can and SHOULD be touched...there are some fun elements that can be worked into textures, movement, and design that facilitate tactile approachability...but certainly there must be some measure of respect to the artists and craftsmen that built the piece?

If there is a ladder...then climb on up...this is an invite.

If there are stairs...welcome, please step on up.

If there is a cargo net...sure, give it a try...hi friend!

But if there are not these things...and there are people and signs asking you not to climb...is it expected to let the 01% who want to do what they wan to do anyway?

I am all for you cutting loose, having as much fun as you can take if not more, but surely there are some checks and balances?

If there are no upfront points of entry or established tools to support climbing then isn't that enough to set the bar...perhaps they builders do not want you on their sculpture?

Am I being a Birgin prude for not wanting my planned art piece to be gang raped by the small percentage that can not respect boundaries?

This is fairly moot, as I planned on providing safe access via steps and at least one slide (all out of public view with a bit of natural light show going on inside) with an entrance and an exit...but if I provide these up front invites am I also to just let the boys be boys and climb on sections not intended for access?

Surely this is not the case...otherwise the injury list for the event would be extensive..."557 fell off the Glowworm sculpture"...how many percentiles do we check before a serious injury or worse comes about?

I am sure I have made a much bigger deal out of this than it deserves right? Out of 50,000 people I will only be stopping maybe 5 the whole time from climbing where they should not right? 5 seems like such a small number, no big deal.

50. 50 would be bad.

500. 500 would be a nightmare.

Being a designer, these aspects only add to the grief involved...in the end the piece will bring a great deal of satisfaction, but some of these considerations seem a bit straining.

How much of this is my natural instinct to guard my six and how much is the reality of the event?

What is the measure based upon your experiences?

Are there a handful of spidermen that must must must increase their bust...or is it a common sight to see dozens of creepy crawlies scuttling about on sculpture not intended for critter access?

Again thanks in advance...saying something now...will only help me be prepared and allow me to provide a better installation as well as not set someone on fire, because that would be bad for many reasons...mostly because roaches smell terrible when you cook them

Atomic Ray

[atomicray]

Here is for hoping that all this is just in my head

lmaorotp

[moonrise]

Here is for hoping that all this is just in my head

lmaorotp

IMHO, this isn't exactly the best thread for you atomicray. There are more productive threads to discuss your project ideas, and the main website explains the interaction aspect of projects...you can/should start your own thread when you're more familiar with the overall flavor of the event from eplaya (eplaya is NOT the playa, the 2 are different)

For what it's worth, I had a LOT of concerns about physical injury to myself or my things; I have a broken back, partially disabled etc and I did okay out there last year.

Currently, almost everyone is either on the playa or busting ass packing and doing last minute stuff. Eric, AntiM, Trilo and many, many others are rock solid and will give primo advice!!

Try connecting with the ARTery, they can guide you and they even have art guards of some sort. I know I would enjoy projects that are more ADA freindly, but lmao, we're talking Burning Man. it's (car) camping and 50%+ young, strong healthy burners, active and schmart, hard working people.
Try connecting with the ARTery after things calm down a bit. Sounds like you have a LOT to offer and hopefully bring to the event. Good luck

[atomicray]

Thanks!

Hey hey hey! In reference to the ADA issues...I have lots and lots of experience with access and facility design dealing with limited mobility...how many of the 50,000 would you say have some measure of limited mobility, other than being wasted and can't stand up

I can easily secure a grant to support a project that is ADA approved.

But if there are 10 people out of 50,000 it might be a tough sell.

I would welcome input as far as expectations and wish list items regarded limited or restricted mobility issues.

And yes I will move my thoughts to a more appropriate thread center

PS
I would easily consider the application of alternative access to equally appreciate the art installation...happily and willingly. I will reconsider the steps anyway.

This whole errant climbing issue has my brain churning anyway...I suspect I will go with a different design that creates vast shade (which is always good) and still allows for the light show I was thinking of...perhaps with a viewing deck that has a counter balance weight, so no climbing...just approach, wait for the setting, then lifted into place, and then set back down in time...or a gentle ramp with flat breaks to avoid too long a straight away...we shall see.

But that is a great thought. I had read the fluff on many a Burning subject, wheelchair access being one of these, but I did not check it off in my to do list, though I should have...not for PC reasons but because I should have, I guess I got caught up in the rest of it all...yeah that's it...the creepy crawlies had my attention

A gentle ramp makes more sense anyway...less trip hazard, less slip damage potential, as well as slowing the progress through the installation.

Thanks!

That is a helpful bit to take my mind off the roaches lol

Atomic Ray

[Eric]

Atomicray- you have a ton of questions (which is very very good), but most of the people on eplaya are leaving for the real playa starting, oh, a few days ago (which is very very bad for getting your questions answered). I know I'm up to my eyeballs in getting ready and I suspect those who aren't already on the road are in the same position; answering questions for next year isn't at the top of my list right now. In a few weeks- absolutely, that's one of the reasons we're all here. One of the best people on the board for these questions (Bob- his avatar is a couch) has been building on the playa for years & gives great answers.

I would recommend spending the next week or two poking around the eplaya and reading all you can. Look at the past years & you'll see that many of your questions have been asked (maybe not the exact question, but close enough to get you in the ballpark, or some such metaphor)

[moonrise]

+100

Eric is spot on, and I forgot about Bob, duh!! He's one A+ experienced and serious man! (don't waste his time) w/an awesome photo collection, his B&W photos always bowl me over, schweeeet! Thanks Bob!!

I would NEVER ask burning man to become ADA all the way, blech, but there are ways to make some of the challenging projects partially ADA freindly and some challenging, seperate or a combo. (I get ansty when I see some climbing things and know I cannot ever do that sorta activity again, no biggie) The movie theatre last year was cool, haha, fun hang out for me...the Pier will be ADA freindly, yeah!

If you can, then I say for sure.... get a grant!! My guess is, every camp has at least one temporarlily injured or disabled burner in it, maybe 1% of the polulation?

(I'm still waiting for a last minute part for my broken down truck, arg, my default world pre-event umpteen millionth challenge! lmfao)

[atomicray]

Eric and Moon thanks.

Yes my timing is a bit off

And no worries, I got the bug because of the client...they offered the money and I said let me research it first...the timing of the event did not connect as I was pouring over the various piles of data on Burning Man as a whole.

I will wait patiently...burn slow and safe

Atomic Ray

[Eric]

burn slow and safe

oh hell no! That takes the fun out of it!