Playa Love

nostratomas · Post by **nostratomas** » Wed Sep 15, 2004 12:33 am

no delish, you showed up for your shifts. It was Jezebelinhel who is owed some nice spankings as I never saw her crazy ass behind the bar.

We'll talk later Miki.

JezebelinHell · Post by **JezebelinHell** » Wed Sep 15, 2004 2:05 am

Hehe, sorry about that. I got kinda...distracted...

alitomcat · Post by **alitomcat** » Wed Sep 15, 2004 7:21 am

My experience was just the opposite....
My husband choose mid-week to tell me he didn't want to be married anymore....then had the balls to ask me to continue to have a great time with him the rest of the week. (which we did)
Your experience has it's merits-mine does not. I still managed to have an awesome experience at BM dispite my husbands aweful timing.
Sunshine

"Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away..."

nostratomas · Post by **nostratomas** » Wed Sep 15, 2004 9:22 am

JezebelinHell wrote:Hehe, sorry about that. I got kinda...distracted...

Don't sweat it baby, I'm glad you had a sweet time.

regynalonglank · Post by **regynalonglank** » Wed Sep 15, 2004 11:12 am

well you rock for having a great time anyways. what a dork! that happened to me at my high school prom, i spent most of it crying because the guy i went with dumped me mid-dance. it's almost like we were having too much fun, and he couldn't take it...whatever. shine on sunshine, shine on. being married sucked for me anyways, i don't think i do married. it seemed like a great idea, but then i hated the format. maybe with someone else it would be different, but i just felt trapped in something that sucked with no way to change it. now i am alone, and that sucks too...but at least i have a chance of finding someone i can have fun with. i'll take my chance, thank you very much!

StonedHeart-BleedingBrain · Post by **StonedHeart-BleedingBrain** » Wed Sep 15, 2004 12:08 pm

wished for fate, she bumped into me the next day, we are soulmates and I am never letting go. You can fall in love a BM, and if you do it's real
In fact I believe the only real thing left is Love, everything else can be bought.

Sorry some dickhead didn't know what they wanted, he will when it's gone, nothing hurts till it's gone

jimbobby · Post by **jimbobby** » Wed Sep 15, 2004 3:00 pm

you played dead
but you never blead
instead you lay still in the grass
all coiled up and hissin'

believe it or not, this comes from a song entitled 'keep on living you'

buyer beware

jimbobby · Post by **jimbobby** » Wed Sep 15, 2004 3:01 pm

loving you that is

Bitterman · Post by **Bitterman** » Thu Sep 16, 2004 12:23 am

It's all about the Haaawwwt SEX and the sneak make out sessions! Eh? Eh? (
*eye brows up eye brows up eye brows up*

rubyredalys · Post by **rubyredalys** » Thu Sep 16, 2004 12:58 am

eh...now that the dust is settling...he still has not called, given me his # or re emailed. perhaps my heart was not meant to fall on the playa.

why would someone want intrest in a younger gal anyway?

now i feel foolish. best of luck to all in your love endeavors.

Alpha · Post by **Alpha** » Thu Sep 16, 2004 7:11 am

Apparently confused, rubyredalys wrote:why would someone want intrest in a younger gal anyway?

Uh, yeah... those older men NEVER like younger women.

:-P

regynalonglank · Post by **regynalonglank** » Thu Sep 16, 2004 11:43 am

ah fuck it, wasn't meant to survive outside the dust bowl i guess. dammit. he's a slime, happens every time. ok, now i'm just ranting, but seriously, i had some real feelings there, and the disappointment is freaking huge. he wasn't even going to call me, if i hadn't caught his ass at home right before he flew out i would have drove my ass all the way up to oregon to see him and he would have been on the east coast. so much for open communication! he was younger...much younger...and i may have been crazy to think it could work, but i did. for me its not about years, its not about parts, its about the heart, inspiration, fun and going deep, in every sense of the word, and we had an amazing compatibility sexually that was immediate and blew my mind. i had never met anyone who was the same flavor of non-vanilla as me before. well at least i know they can exist. even if it won't be anywhere near me. boo hoo...i am sad. but in a way i am also relieved. there is something about being with someone much younger that makes me feel more alive, regaining my youth and spirit of fun, but there is also something about it that makes me feel old, fat, insecure, and like i better start fucking working out before they realize that i am not as hot as i used to be...a lot of pressure in being with someone younger. there has to be some compelling reason to do it...and just hottie body ain't usually gonna be enough. just my two cents...my broken hearted, stupid ass playa love tanked two cents...for whatever that's worth!!!

JezebelinHell · Post by **JezebelinHell** » Thu Sep 16, 2004 4:06 pm

Mine writes to me decently often. I seriously doubt she fell for me as hard as I fell for her though. I guess it's possible, but it's pretty unlikely.

chain · Post by **chain** » Thu Sep 16, 2004 4:49 pm

Ok, So everyone seems to be bearing their souls here on the e-playa. Here is my somewhat embarrassing contribution. Let it be known that many men fell under her spell during this Burning Man. She was/is a heart opening experience for me and beyond the feelings of "in-love" hopefully a good friend that I will meet again. Enjoy! (or squirm)

Dear Jessica (Green Eyed Siren of the Playa),

Caveat: Please read any attempt at prose in this letter with a tone of self-jest.

I am writing this one-week after getting back from the Burning Man event. So it happened, delicious Samsara, powerful yet subtle. I “fell head over heals” for you. I could see it coming with your intoxicating smile in Spike’s vampire bar. It was not the “blood” that I drank either. It seems so dark in there that I do not really know now if it was your green eyes that I noticed first or they are just what got stamped over that first memory. The brain is a fantastic historical revisionist.

I felt drawn toward you in an unusual way. I have found that physical appearance never makes much of an impression. I am attracted to intelligence and emotional qualities. With you it was the fourth option. I think there is a strange/intense spiritual connection. These are so rare in my life that I did not expect to experience it again. Of course all other 3 attractions were felt quickly when I talked with you.

Ok so the statistics are:

> 35,000 people
1 Vampire Bar
1 Faux Marijuana wreath
2 love struck “boys” (you can list me amongst the ones you have now)
1 Angry Woman
1 Scammed Coffee
15 years difference (I refer to sonnet 116 on this one)
1 Stupa, 1 futon, 2 nights, a stolen corner of a sleeping bag
2 masks
20 dirty fingernails

I want to let you know that everything I said was sincere and heartfelt. It was not just due to dehydration, chemicals or the “magic” of Burning Man. Of course the many “I love you's” were also sincere, though possibly ill advised to say. I am pretty free with my love in general and cannot resist communicating it when I feel these kind of connections ( I count maybe four “strong spiritual connections” and of the “four” the one I felt with you is the most intense). At this point I am wondering if I will ever hear from you or see you again. Not to say that I feel or sense that you were insincere in any way. I am just very aware of impermanence. The heart is often fickle and you are searching a state of freedom. Hell, in hindsight, I might even seem like an old perv… who knows.

So I offer you the most distilled love I can. I have been distilling mine for many years to remove possession, manipulation, desire and all other artifacts that make love bitter over time. It is about as perfect as the giver (not very). It is better than the typical “snake oil” sold out there (Think "Shakti breasts, let it go!" tantric gurus and all men who will rush to take their place as your mentor, hero, inspiration, teacher) I know that list may seem harsh, but you are my teacher and a mentor as well.

My love for you is real (but as illusory as everything else). My arms are another home. So if you want me in your life lets try to:

Make masks
Do art
Hang out with my kids
Meet your brother
Visit Block Island
Visit Eric and learn some Tibetan in Vancouver BC
Visit Chang Mai together
Go to Dharamsala and Tibet when it is free
Take pictures
Go places our spirits take us.

Notice, Sex is not on the list. I do want to make love with you but it is not a goal and is not at all “necessary” for us to be close. In fact some of the most intimate moments I have ever felt were when we cuddled in the Stupa and naked on the playa. I am very happy that we did not have sex. It may have clouded my vision. Besides, I spent a lot of good energy memorizing your eyes.

If you do not ever want to talk again, I will be hurt. What is sadness but another emotion to watch and try to understand. Right?

Tears in my eyes. Smile on my face,
Cory

Geeze, I am probably going to regret posting this... oh well

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Thu Sep 16, 2004 5:10 pm

quite lovely

KellY · Post by **KellY** » Thu Sep 16, 2004 8:04 pm

I met the lovely BlackSwan on the playa in 2002. We got married (for real) at Thunderdome in 2003. The fact that we only lived an hour away from eachother helped, no doubt. Never experienced more than PlayaLust/Like before then...Oy, and a Ranger, no less...

Good luck Jez and everyone else. There's been a lot of playa-born romances turning into permanent arrangements amongst folks I know this year, hope y'all can join the crowd.

Sensei · Post by **Sensei** » Fri Sep 17, 2004 11:41 pm

KellY wrote:I met the lovely BlackSwan on the playa in 2002. We got married (for real) at Thunderdome in 2003. The fact that we only lived an hour away from eachother helped, no doubt. Never experienced more than PlayaLust/Like before then...Oy, and a Ranger, no less...

Call me a sucker, but I love that story.

JezebelinHell · Post by **JezebelinHell** » Sun Sep 19, 2004 11:50 pm

I have a completely unrelated opportunity to move to NYC (where she lives) next summer. I'm absolutely petrified to do it, because I've never really left the west coast, and my whole family's here, and it'll be a huge new city where I know all of five people, etc...but what scares me most is living that close to her, and possibly finding out how she really feels about me in a day-to-day setting. That's way scarier than moving 3,000 miles from home any day.

wovenone · Post by **wovenone** » Mon Sep 20, 2004 1:00 am

i totally know what you mean jezzie, because i sent my first email, hopefully not my last, to one of my playa love connections today. it makes me nervous. like, what if he doesn't write back? while his info was tacked up beside my computer it was like having money in the bank. now i feel like i've maxed my credit card and there's nothing left to fall back on later. but apparently there's a rumor going around that one regrets what one fails to do more than the times one acts on inspirations..

regynalonglank · Post by **regynalonglank** » Mon Sep 20, 2004 10:37 am

NYC is fabulous. i lived there for five years, went for school from the west coast, expected to hate it and come right back, but stayed. stand up folks, lots to do...expensive as hell, but worth it. just have to make a real effort to stay connected with the earth, get out of the damn city and breathe some air every few weeks just for the heck of it...anyways, i say go for it. what the hell, you only live once...or twice...or maybe three times, but that's pushing it! go jezibel, go...if you can hack reno, you'll be fine :)

e_v · Post by **e_v** » Mon Sep 20, 2004 9:32 pm

had my heart broken on the playa, only to be mended by the sweetest man i've ever met for the next few days. who knew you could feel so much in such a short time?
it was the return to the real world that was brutal, once my playa love affair came to an (expected, but nonetheless melancholy) end, and i was forced to finally accept my newly loveless state in a city that had never felt so soulless. i say do whatever you can to extend playa love into the rest of your life! take risks! do crazy things you would never otherwise do! it it's one lesson that i learned this year, it's holding back what you really feel that ends up hurting you the most! make you're feelings known before it's too late! what've you got to lose compared to what you could gain?
well, they say hindsight is always 20-20...
wishing all of you lovesick lonelies the best of luck!
*e

tokenbrit · Post by **tokenbrit** » Tue Sep 21, 2004 5:10 am

It's alright for you lot - you all live on the same continent!!! I completely fell for a lovely lovely kind, funny, intelligent, gorgeous man who lives in Seattle and then got to fly back to London. cried all the way from Houston to Clapham....probably not the greatest idea to book a longhaul flight on the 7th......won't be doing that next year.......!

nostratomas · Post by **nostratomas** » Tue Sep 21, 2004 10:41 am

JezebelinHell wrote:I have a completely unrelated opportunity to move to NYC (where she lives) next summer. I'm absolutely petrified to do it, because I've never really left the west coast, and my whole family's here, and it'll be a huge new city where I know all of five people, etc...but what scares me most is living that close to her, and possibly finding out how she really feels about me in a day-to-day setting. That's way scarier than moving 3,000 miles from home any day.

Be scared of no opportunity at all not a vastly good one.

buckethead alien · Post by **buckethead alien** » Tue Sep 21, 2004 12:58 pm

Oh, to taste again that playa love

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Tue Sep 21, 2004 1:07 pm

tokenbrit wrote:It's alright for you lot - you all live on the same continent!!! I completely fell for a lovely lovely kind, funny, intelligent, gorgeous man who lives in Seattle and then got to fly back to London. cried all the way from Houston to Clapham....probably not the greatest idea to book a longhaul flight on the 7th......won't be doing that next year.......!

i hear ya. try 10,000 miles. that one hurts like hell.

but do come visit us here in seattle........

tokenbrit · Post by **tokenbrit** » Wed Sep 22, 2004 6:16 am

you never know - I may take you up on that! I'm always looking for an excuse for another adventure..... :lol:

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Wed Sep 22, 2004 9:03 am

tokenbrit wrote:you never know - I may take you up on that! I'm always looking for an excuse for another adventure.....

i've been ordered to come to London, so if i get there i'll look ya up. we can do burner swapping!

?uestion · Post by **?uestion** » Thu Sep 23, 2004 1:10 am

Playa Love? I've never been there.

Not after the last 3 years being single at black rock (I'm a 5x burner). I *have* experienced love - with the stranger who became my laughter, with the couple who kept me warm for a night with conversation, even sometimes with myself (finally). And despite anything else I say, I am terribly grateful.

But the Playa Love that's kicked the shit out of all of you. It just hasn't happened.

Funny thing is, I think that burningman is one of the most romantic places there is. Chaos, beauty and wonder all rushing at you so fast you can't breathe. But despite the amazingness, I can't escape the feeling that, at least once, I'd like to go tumbling through dusty deep space with someone in my arms.

Maybe I know what you're thinking...I've tried to manifest my desires. I've tried to release all expectations. I constantly work towards being more generous and vibrant. Ironically, I've never felt more attractive and, back in the narrow confines of the un/real world, I have no problems meeting people romantically.

What gets to me is the fact that this gets to me. I've learned, felt, and experienced so much but I still long to be blindsided by a black rock semi-trailer carrying a fuckload of hearts (with those chrome lady mudflaps as the kicker).

In reading this thread though one thing strikes me. It seems the higher you go, the harder you hit the ground. But being earthbound, I'd rather take my chances with the landing than never get to freefall.

Stormy · Post by **Stormy** » Thu Sep 23, 2004 9:31 pm

Happy Anniversary Kelly. Good seeing you and Blackswan together.

Add Judge and I to the Playa couple list. We met at our theme camp three years ago. We were friends the first year and remember thinking he was such a sweetheart. Second year the sparks ignated when we were working one night. Every time he sent me a sinner to "work on" he kept telling how amazing he thought my outfit was and had this *look* in his eyes. Hooked up the next evening and that started a LDR for us. Still happily married and now living in LA.

nostratomas · Post by **nostratomas** » Fri Sep 24, 2004 10:06 am

Playa Love
Playa Lust
all the remains
is our memory
in the Playa Dust

Playa Love

opposite playa love

dang. that's gotta hurt

i take it all back!

Love Letter to Jessica (The Green Eyed Siren of the Playa)

do it

from the lowest of the lows, to the highest of the highs

Better 2have never?