Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

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Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Urban » Mon Mar 03, 2014 10:40 am

I saw someone post this morning seeking kickstarter funds for an Art car. Good Luck and a fine donation. However Cuppa Joe Martínez Morín noted" I thought you had to have boobs to ride on an art car. I've ridden probably like five art cars in the five years I've been to the Playa."
I have faced the identical situation. I have been 5 times. I have ridden maybe 3 times and yet I have attempted to ride dozens of times only to be turned away by "Private" or "You Must be a Member of Camp F*Nutz" or just blocked.
My early year, I asked a driver of a large Art Car about the proper way to board and depart from an Art Car. He gave me specific instructions, safe and considerate.
My wife and I are 50+ . That is not an issue as we are capable of walking. I had strokes and walk with a cane. We both are active in many activities on the Playa.
The answer may be simply that I am not "Cool" enough to be seen on their Art Car. Who knows, but I think the rules covering who can ride what when should be reviewed esp. if they go through the process of licensing at the DMV.

Do you have difficulty boarding a stopped Art car that is half empty? Is this just bullshit? Will trolls come out of the woodwork now?
No really, can you share if you also had difficulty being acccepted by an Art Car?

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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Dr. Pyro » Mon Mar 03, 2014 10:57 am

Urban wrote: The answer may be simply that I am not "Cool" enough to be seen on their Art Car.
Sorry to hear about your troubles, but you may have figured it out on your own.

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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Urban » Mon Mar 03, 2014 11:00 am

In addition to water, single-ply tp, lights and vinegar, I may have to attend "Cool-School." That could be my solution!

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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by trilobyte » Mon Mar 03, 2014 11:18 am

I'm giving this a nudge over to Experiences At Burning Man, since that's a better fit.

To answer the question, no I haven't had any real trouble getting rides aboard art cars. Of course, I try to use a bit of common sense. I don't try to flag down or stop vehicles that are already moving, I don't ask for rides if I'm with a bike, and if a vehicle looks full I'll usually wave and keep moving unless someone invites me aboard.

Having built and crewed a number of mutant vehicles in the past, I've seen first-hand what kind of jerks will flag down an MV or even attempt to jump onto the moving vehicle, as well as the sense of entitlement some people express that a mutant vehicle's crew and other passengers drop what they're doing to play personal taxi for people. So I take great pains to make sure to compliment the builders on their hard work, engage in conversation (if they're not busy), and generally be nice. If they can't take me aboard, they can't take me aboard - I'm okay with that.

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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by VultureChow » Mon Mar 03, 2014 11:24 am

I have tits, but not the type of body anyone wants gyrating in a cage or on a pole.

I've never had trouble getting on an MV, but I also haven't tried most of the high profile ones at night.

My method is to go to one that is stopped by an art piece and chat up the driver, and then as they're loading up to move on, I ask If I might join them. No one has ever said no.
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by TT120 » Mon Mar 03, 2014 11:35 am

I've tried a few times when they are stopped but have been turned down. I fully expected that though as I'm a middle aged white guy with no tits at all. I don't exactly fit the image they are trying to maintain. No worries, plenty to see and do.......I did get a ride on the Captains boat and that was really cool. Hopefully I will get another ride this year....
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Nipple » Mon Mar 03, 2014 11:48 am

I spent a good handful of time helping people onto my camp's art car. I had a hard time boarding people onto the art car.

It has a nice welcoming back porch that I'm pretty sure will fuck you up if you trip. It just screams "Jump on me, while I'm moving! I WANT TO SEE YOUR BRAIN MEATS!" Once big pieces of steel get a taste for human blood, it's really hard to control them.

I took to sitting on that porch, blocking people from jumping on. We were totally happy to stop and pick people up every few feet. It's hard to communicate over the noise of the art car "WAIT! I WANT YOU ON HERE, BUT LET ME GET THIS THING STOPPED FIRST!" Palms up in a stop motion, people took as "Fuck off, fatty". I took to nodding "YES" while holding up the stop hands, mouthing "WAIT".

That seemed to mostly work, unless people were just FUCKING DE-TER-MINED to jump onto the porch. I usually impolitely asked those people to not get on, as soon as the boat was stopped. That special breed seemed the type who were going to get on, and sit on the DJ mixer, or climb around on the sides or... who knows what goes on in those people's heads. Perhaps they'd go into the pilot house screaming "MY TURN TO DRIVE. ME DRIVER NOW!"

I'd rather those special folks not be aboard.

Next year I have intentions of making a sign out of a flagger paddle stop sign that says "WAIT" on one side, and "FUCK YEAH" on the other.

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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by FossaFerox » Mon Mar 03, 2014 11:59 am

I rode on four my first year and never got turned away. I was also admittedly a jerk and jumped onto a moving one on Tuesday night, but there's a story behind that one and I don't think anyone was upset with me once they realized I was there. In fact, I spent a few hours riding around with them and pushing the car out of loose dust drifts whenever it got stuck (happened probably a dozen times) so I'd like to think that I made up for my brazenness.

In all though, I never saw any MV driver's being dicks with letting people on if the car was designed to carry people. I suspect a lot of the "You must be this cool to ride the art car" stuff comes from people who either don't understand etiquette and/or feel very entitled. Expecting a moving MV to stop to pick you up is a bit ridiculous.

Now, I'm not a girl, but I'm not overly hard on the eyes and my vest is fun so *maybe* it's a more serious problem than my experience would indicate? I'm not sure, but from what I can tell people spend hundreds of hours and thousands of dollars building these awesome creations for the sole purpose of sharing them with us. The kind of people behind these projects strike me as both generous and cool as hell.
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Eric » Mon Mar 03, 2014 1:02 pm

FossaFerox wrote:I suspect a lot of the "You must be this cool to ride the art car" stuff comes from people who either don't understand etiquette and/or feel very entitled. Expecting a moving MV to stop to pick you up is a bit ridiculous.
It also comes from quite a few of the big party barges being notorious pricks (there are some extremely good "barges" out there as well, like BAAAHS, the Big-Ass Amazingly Awesome Homosexual Sheep, which would let everyone who was able on board). It's such a known problem we even did our cover story on it last year. (link is a .pdf)
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Urban » Mon Mar 03, 2014 2:18 pm

trilobyte wrote:I'm giving this a nudge over to Experiences At Burning Man, since that's a better fit.

To answer the question, no I haven't had any real trouble getting rides aboard art cars. Of course, I try to use a bit of common sense. I don't try to flag down or stop vehicles that are already moving, I don't ask for rides if I'm with a bike, and if a vehicle looks full I'll usually wave and keep moving unless someone invites me aboard.

Having built and crewed a number of mutant vehicles in the past, I've seen first-hand what kind of jerks will flag down an MV or even attempt to jump onto the moving vehicle, as well as the sense of entitlement some people express that a mutant vehicle's crew and other passengers drop what they're doing to play personal taxi for people. So I take great pains to make sure to compliment the builders on their hard work, engage in conversation (if they're not busy), and generally be nice. If they can't take me aboard, they can't take me aboard - I'm okay with that.
Sorry Trilobyte, I would just never do that. The cane and the Vertigo keeps me from chasing and hopping on a moving car. And I usually approach the driver if stopped or the guard at the gate. Momma didn't raise no fool...

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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by FossaFerox » Mon Mar 03, 2014 2:28 pm

Alright, so according to the article the most notorious car that was there the year I was there is Robot Heart? To me this is a perfect example of etiquette, expectations, and entitlement. I actually stumbled upon Robot Heart in deep playa on Wednesday night and it never even crossed my mind to try to ride the fucking thing. There is no "riding" it, first of all...

Robot Heart isn't like most art cars. They drive to location, set up, and that's it. They're there till dawn. What's more, the experience of Robot Heart isn't on the car it's on the dance floor between the car and the scissor lift. The only reason to BE on the car is because YOU consider it a status symbol to be up on stage near the DJ. And unlike most of the dance platforms at more conventional sound camps this one is pretty much on top of the DJs with their equipment, wiring, and speaker stacks. They *have* to have door control.

Anyone complaining about not getting to be on Robot Heart is a half step away from the single guys bitching they weren't allowed into the orgy dome by themselves. To anyone who was denied entry in either case: I'm sorry you feel that it was necessary or appropriate, but in the interests of everyone involved and particularly the people making it all possible, no.
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Bounce530 » Mon Mar 03, 2014 5:45 pm

There have been two times I've told people to piss off, and not given them rides. Once was this girl who jumped in front of my MV and stood there until I stopped, then as she was trying to climb aboard demanded that I go the complete opposite way I was going and take her to a sound camp where she was late for her DJ'ing gig at. Had she been in the slightest bit polite I would have taken her there, but it was the "you need to take me across the playa to _____camp I'm late for my DJ'ing gig, you HAVE to take me there NOW, DON'T YOU KNOW THAT I'M AN IMPORTANT DJ?!" that made me tell her no.

The second time was when some guy flagged me down and asked to ride, I said "sure, be careful climbing up the ladder." and as I'm saying that, he waved over about 6 other people that were lurking in the darkness. My car can only take about 4 riders. I told them I could take a couple of them but not all of them, they responded with "we'll all fit" well yeah, maybe 7 people could physically fit on top of the MV, but no way can my little golf cart handle the weight of all those people.

If things like that make me a mutant vehicle snob then so be it. Yeah, I'll taxi you if need be, but don't be demanding about it, or try to be sneaky about it either.
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by theCryptofishist » Mon Mar 03, 2014 5:47 pm

I haven't tried in years. I suspect I represent special challenges. I should have asked Empire of Dirt... I loved that house.

I have sort of hated the times I've driven on the playa; I wouldn't make an art car...

And, um, what Bounce said. And yes, they are the beautiful, but deadly, succubai/incubai of the playa...
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Canoe » Mon Mar 03, 2014 6:05 pm

I've been on one art car to take them to pickup cases of water they needed from my camp. And a half dozen more as part of helping them trouble shoot problems.

But, I've had many people taking my gifted water, electrolyte or whatever, tell me that I can get on their art car anytime, as it's: theirs, their camps, they're the bouncer, etc., along with if I need any tools, a meal, etc.. Too bad I'm so busy doing my own thing that I never seem to have time to take them up on it.

Although licensed for use in BRC they are not an amenity of BRC. A ride on an art car is a gift. As usual, those gifting choose who they gift to.

Heard of issues with an art car belonging to a Plug'n'Play camp. If you didn't pay them to host you, or you're not eye candy for their members, you're out of luck. Stories only, no first hand on that.
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by trilobyte » Mon Mar 03, 2014 6:19 pm

It's great that you wouldn't, but many others do. Hell, I've even seen someone with a cane bang on the side of a vehicle that was stopped momentarily at an intersection as it waited for a smaller ship to pass.

The point of my post though, and what I've seen in many other responses is that generally speaking if you're good to people, they'll be good to you.

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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by tamarakay » Mon Mar 03, 2014 6:21 pm

I rode the captains boat and i've driven both of the barbie cars.
I've tried to get rides with others, but nope. I'm polite, ask nice etc, but nope.

When driving I have had all of the above horror stories, but also have met some truly fantastic people. We picked up a load of newbies around the corner from our camp and took them bar hopping on the back streets, then out adventuring into the deep playa. They had no idea all of that was out there. That was a most special night. I hope to get the car at least one night this year and do that all again.
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by BBadger » Mon Mar 03, 2014 7:29 pm

I do want MVs to be open to people to enjoy, but having helped operate one, it does get old ensuring that people embark/disembark safely. That was after people would jump off without having us stop, which was not safe. After some of that we'd actually come to a full stop to let people off after a while. It also got old just taking it out for a spin too, rather than doing our own thing. Still, having that MV was a neat experience and it was cool meeting some of the people that wanted to board, and the view during some of the events was great.

My first year I did not go on any art cars at all, but everything was new and fantastic so I didn't care.
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Canoe » Mon Mar 03, 2014 7:42 pm

trilobyte wrote:...generally speaking if you're good to people, they'll be good to you.
(what a surprise - not)
very much so
the neatest gifts I got were from those accepting my gifts, but by those observing my gifting
what goes around, comes around?

but, as a ride on an art car is a gift, you don't get to choose what comes around

Things like the cane wanting/needing a ride, one can only hope it was due to an un-obvious reason, otherwise, why not give a ride?

That said, I've flagged down cars going by, to get others a ride and a drop off at or nearest to the medical closest to where the car is going. Or for someone nearing the end of their physical resources, a drop off to help them get to their destination. Every car has stopped, but perhaps they're reading my face or an obvious situation.
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Sham » Mon Mar 03, 2014 10:28 pm

I don't think I was ever turned down for rides on art cars and go on several a year. I also don't plan on depending on them for my transportation, so I don't ask often.

On my own art car, I am limited on the number of people it will hold, so I can't just take anyone asking. On many occasions in the deep playa, I'll pull over and offer a ride to someone needing it.

Several years back, I came upon two ladies in wedding gowns who were walking with a bit of trouble in the gowns. I offered them a ride on the top of my car, and they had a blast and it added quite a bit of fun to the experience for everyone on the playa.

A good thing to keep in mind is that if a large party vehicle allowed everyone on, it would be overloaded in minutes.

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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by vargaso » Tue Mar 04, 2014 11:32 am

My wife and I didn't ride an art car until our little camp brought one our third year out in 2009. We specialized in the "un-cool", apparently, as we were told multiple times by some of our passengers that this was the first time they were told "yes" when asking to ride an MV. We never turned anyone away unless we were full. We had all the same issues mentioned by others on this thread with rude people, jumping on the boat while we were moving, etc.

Our first two years, we were denied the few times we asked to ride. Since then, I've been lucky enough to camp with people who know others that operate some really cool MVs. If not, I most likely would not have gotten a chance to ride, at least not during peak party hours at night. My advice for those not in the possession of a young, hot body and/or connections, is to approach one of the low-key vehicles while they're stopped and starting chatting up the driver. Do not ask them to take you to a specific place. MV's ain't taxis, except the ones that are. (We occasionally ferried people to a specific location, but more often than not, when asked, we'd give a non-committal "hop on" and then proceed to drive to somewhere else. Most of the time we made it fun, but occasionally people got pissed and hopped off. Oh well.) The big dance-party cars are hard to get on, in my experience. Easiest chance is during the daytime art-tour runs, when the really big MV's tool around the installations.

I'll add, that if you really want to have fun on the playa, build an art car. The year we did it is still my best burn, and probably the funnest week of my life. There's no better way to meet people and create spontaneous, chaotic fun.

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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Dr Helix » Tue Mar 04, 2014 1:15 pm

I have a small art car (The Playa Long Hauler) that picks up people that needs rides and usually delivers them to their location (if they know where it is!) It's a great way to meet new people. So if you see me and I'm not hauling someone's dj equipment or ice or whatever, just flag me and I'll pick you up.
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Savannah » Tue Mar 04, 2014 2:04 pm

I've been turned down for rides plenty of times. I've had more refusals than rides.

Having boobs is no guarantee of a ride, nor would I want it to be.
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by theCryptofishist » Tue Mar 04, 2014 3:01 pm

(they're idiots, Savannah, idiots!)
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Dr. Pyro » Tue Mar 04, 2014 4:14 pm

I offered Savannah a ride on our art car, but she refused saying that it looked suspeciously like the back of an RV.

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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Timezone LaFontaine » Tue Mar 04, 2014 4:30 pm

I've had a lot more luck getting to board vehicles earlier in the week when there's been fewer people in BRC. I also have never requested to go to any particular destination. I just assume I'm in for a long walk after my ride and enjoy meeting the other people on board. By Thursday, I don't really bother trying to get on board anything because it seems that there are throngs of people dashing across the playa to get a ride on anything moving.
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Ratty » Tue Mar 04, 2014 4:54 pm

I ride art cars all night when I'm dressed in my See's Candy outfit, (handing out hard candy). It's not my favorite 'random candy delivery' but hey, everybody needs a breath mint or cinnamon or butterscotch candy.
I can also get on when I'm in my crossing guard outfit. Put up the stop sign, then the kiss, then the dance, then I can board and party. I'm not an MV whore but if it comes along I'll ride. It's a hell of alot better than the animal control. They pick you up and intentionally drop you as far from home as possible.

I view Mv's as a wonderful thing to SEE. My bike is usually better transport.
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Urban » Wed Mar 05, 2014 1:17 pm

Thank You all for your replies

Maybe it will be better this year. We have taken bikes but with my Vertigo and my cane, it is hard to start and hard to stop but going is great! Actually, that is a guarantee that we will not jump on before it stops and jump off before it stops! I look helpless and pathetic laying face down on the Playa floor.

We stroll the playa for hours always taking water and gifts and snacks! If you see us, stop and talk and Evil F Bunny will give you some cookies. She always has plenty of handmade ones in my satchel.

I am going to have to try the Crossing Guard outfit! Till we all get home!

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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by BoyScoutGirl » Wed Mar 05, 2014 2:26 pm

Ratty wrote:... I view Mv's as a wonderful thing to SEE. My bike is usually better transport.
This pretty much sums up my view, but I ride my bike a lot when not on the playa, so I've very comfortable with it.

Urban, would a tricycle be a tenable solution to help with vertigo?
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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by Urban » Wed Mar 05, 2014 2:32 pm

BoyScoutGirl wrote:
Ratty wrote:... I view Mv's as a wonderful thing to SEE. My bike is usually better transport.
This pretty much sums up my view, but I ride my bike a lot when not on the playa, so I've very comfortable with it.

Urban, would a tricycle be a tenable solution to help with vertigo?
Certainly would be for both of us, but we are lucky to even be going. I am afraid tricycles may have to wait. I don't think it would be a good reason for a Kickstarter Campaign, even with the cookies!

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Re: Did you ever have a hard time boarding an Art Car?

Post by thirt33n » Thu Mar 20, 2014 8:04 pm

FossaFerox wrote:
Anyone complaining about not getting to be on Robot Heart is a half step away from the single guys bitching they weren't allowed into the orgy dome by themselves.

wait,...there IS an orgy dome?!
blow.

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