Kamp Apokiliptika.....

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the_iconoclast
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4th of Juplaya intel report.

Post by the_iconoclast » Tue Jul 05, 2005 2:47 am

From the desk of the Kommisar:

Apokiliptika reconned the Playa this last Holiday weekend. In short order - The Lake was not seen and the Playa for the most part was dry - except when traveling along the west shore towards Black Rock. Three large KAmps were evident - and the one infiltrated was an excellent choice. Having selected to camp with DPW, things went well. At night I was able to introduce small splinter cells of flesh eating voles to their new environment. The trail of sod left from Winnemucca to the Playa has finally brought the Mormon Cricket to the edge of the Playa - they were spotted around Frog Pond.

Winds have started to kick and the temp. is finally getting into the "Hot Zone".

Re: the Swiss winter camo sheets - I used one of the two I purchased and it survived quite well from Sat. morning through Monday eve when I left. The key to use is to minimize the tarp rubbing on any sharp edges. I secured it to my vehicle on the driver side and used tent stakes and a pole to create a bit of shade - complete use of supplies - 1 tarp, 4 tent pegs, 5 pieces of 550 cord. The effect of the holes in the marerial in the use of it as a shade structure had a very welcome effect - while it didn't offer 100% shade - it did allow for a breeze in the shade when a good forced wind was blowing. It was pleasing to discover the level of wind reduction it offered.

More info forthcoming after next weekend.

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drakewayson
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Post by drakewayson » Tue Jul 05, 2005 5:00 am

mullethunter wrote:pssst.... what's a pbr?

i never said anything about using my assets to your detriment, just to get myself in, and besides, i've already talked with the kernul about doing some undercover agent work for the cause, so there.
As long as you have your papers.....

What the heck, your in. I'm going to be a terrible guard....big and bad looking but with no bite....
I look just like Teddy Roosevelt except I'm taller, heavier, have no moustache and am much younger. Bully!

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mullethunter
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Post by mullethunter » Tue Jul 05, 2005 5:29 am

jumping up and down with glee like a schoolgirl
yippee!
If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did."
-Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handy

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drakewayson
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Post by drakewayson » Tue Jul 05, 2005 6:06 am

mullethunter wrote:jumping up and down with glee like a schoolgirl
yippee!
In one of those Britney Spears schoolgirl outfits? Little plaid skirt? Ouch.

Image
I look just like Teddy Roosevelt except I'm taller, heavier, have no moustache and am much younger. Bully!

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joel the ornery
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may i suggest....

Post by joel the ornery » Tue Jul 05, 2005 6:12 am

"Naughty School Girl Night"
Image

somewhere, sometime on the playa

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drakewayson
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Post by drakewayson » Tue Jul 05, 2005 6:13 am

I can think of few things that would make me abandon my post and Komrades....but that is one.....I wonder if the Kernul grants leave for "special emergencies". This would qualify.
I look just like Teddy Roosevelt except I'm taller, heavier, have no moustache and am much younger. Bully!

helitack
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Post by helitack » Tue Jul 05, 2005 6:38 am

Yes Major, but they have to be indoctrinated in MY tent first.
Commandante' heli
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drakewayson
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Post by drakewayson » Tue Jul 05, 2005 6:43 am

Heli-but if you're not out "on the wall *"...and your stuck in your tent doing that leadership thing....you may not realize which of the horde we let through for your interrogation plans and which we retain for our own special purposes....

* (poor movie reference) - you want the truth, you can't handle the truth......
I look just like Teddy Roosevelt except I'm taller, heavier, have no moustache and am much younger. Bully!

helitack
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Post by helitack » Tue Jul 05, 2005 6:46 am

Oh, OK.
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mullethunter
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Post by mullethunter » Tue Jul 05, 2005 6:33 pm

drakewayson wrote:
mullethunter wrote:jumping up and down with glee like a schoolgirl
yippee!
In one of those Britney Spears schoolgirl outfits? Little plaid skirt? Ouch.

Image
omg, i can't believe i hadn't thought of that earlier! over here all the middle and high school kids have to wear uniforms, and they are very much like that picture, with the white shirt, jacket and plaid skirt. there are uniform stores all over the place here. well, i know what i'll be doing this weekend; shopping for a uniform! :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :wink:
If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did."
-Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handy

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sputnik
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Bikini Girls with Machine Guns

Post by sputnik » Wed Jul 06, 2005 9:14 am

Well I been a drag racer on LSD,
and i rode bare-assed on top of the shpinx,
I even had a gorilla on the slopes of kismet,
and man, that was fun for a while you bet but...

bikini girls with machine guns,
bikini girls with machine guns,
that stuff will kill ya, it's loaded with fun,
bikini girls with machine guns

Well i savored many foriegn kinds of delicacies,
intoxicated til i can't tell what the hell i could see,
had all the violence and liquor within close reach,
but all bars, pills and threeways lead me back to the beach
and...

bikini girls with machine guns,
bikini girls with machine guns,
that stuff will kill ya, it's loaded with fun,
bikini girls with machine guns

now they say that virtue is it's own reward,
but when that surf comes in i'm gonna get my board,
I got my own ideas about the righteous kick,
you can keep the rewards, i'd just as soon stay sick...

bikini girls with machine guns,
bikini girls with machine guns,
that stuff will kill ya, it's loaded with fun,
bikini girls with machine guns

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mullethunter
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Post by mullethunter » Wed Jul 06, 2005 7:58 pm

what's that you say? a guide for how to destroy the earth? i thought this was practically tailor-made for apokaliptika! i'm sure many of these ideas have already been thought through by the kernul et al., but maybe there's some new methods in here. enjoy.
http://ned.ucam.org/~sdh31/misc/destroy.html
If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did."
-Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handy

robotland
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Post by robotland » Thu Jul 07, 2005 6:32 am

Thanks. That's just the mood I'm in today. A little light reading should cheer me up.
Howdy From Kalamazoo

helitack
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Post by helitack » Sat Jul 09, 2005 2:35 pm

Destruction can be interpreted as creation too.

¡Viva el poste que baila!

¡El bailar erótico de Viva!

¡Medias mujeres desnudas de Viva!

¡Viva el Kantina Apokiliptika!
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Peacekeeper
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Post by Peacekeeper » Mon Jul 11, 2005 8:10 am

Security Council Resolution 1492


Stand Down Apokalyptika!!!!

By unanimous descision, the UN Peacekeepers have voted Apokalyptika to be
in violation of International Law 1066 - "Being too Namby Pamby and soft around the edges to be the true harbingers of the Apokalypse". Prepare to be boarded, and to have some real troops treat you like the little girlies you clearly are....

Message ends.

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EvilDustBooger
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Post by EvilDustBooger » Mon Jul 11, 2005 8:26 am

Peacekeepers wrote:Security Council Resolution ...


UN Peacekeepers
UNaccountable
UNbearable
UNconsionable
UNderhanded
UNjust
UNlawful
UNnecessary
UNprincipled
UNreasonable
UNruly
UNscrupulous
UNtrustworthy

Peace Out

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Peacekeeper
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Post by Peacekeeper » Mon Jul 11, 2005 8:33 am

Oh Yeah?

UNeqiuvocal
UNmistakeable
UNdeniable
UNputdownable
UNsurmountable
UNdefeatable
UNseperable
UNbelievable
UNimpressionable
UNimpressed

and

UNited....


and we agree,
PEACE out.

helitack
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Post by helitack » Mon Jul 11, 2005 10:51 am

Peacekeepers wrote:Security Council Resolution 1492


Stand Down Apokalyptika!!!!

By unanimous descision, the UN Peacekeepers have voted Apokalyptika to be
in violation of International Law 1066 - "Being too Namby Pamby and soft around the edges to be the true harbingers of the Apokalypse". Prepare to be boarded, and to have some real troops treat you like the little girlies you clearly are....

Message ends.
That is truly funny. Coming from wearers of sissy blue headwear. Stand down my keester. Ha! Peace is for those who have the illusion of your New World Order. Your wimmin will be begging to become part of the Komplex. They will easily recognize the superior gene pool. And it's time to chlorinate yours. Your boys will melt at the sight of the Interrogation Squad. They will become part of the playa. Small specks of baby blue integrated with dust. We do not recognize IL 1066.
You will learn fear. You will cower at the mere thought of the KA forces. We strongly suggest that you plan your demise accordingly.

No Quarter will be asked, and none will be granted.
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EvilDustBooger
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Post by EvilDustBooger » Mon Jul 11, 2005 11:59 am

helitack wrote:
No Quarter will be asked, and none will be granted.[/quote wrote:
(squelch)
We appreciate that no commerce will be allowed to live within your perimeter.
Evil will definitely recon your facilities.
over.

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unjonharley
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Post by unjonharley » Mon Jul 11, 2005 12:04 pm

EvilDustBooger wrote:
helitack wrote:
No Quarter will be asked, and none will be granted.[/quote wrote:
(squelch)
We appreciate that no commerce will be allowed to live within your perimeter.
Evil will definitely recon your facilities.
over.
~
I was trying to come up with something. But....That's fucking funny.
I'm the contraptioneer your mother warned you about.

zoeypants
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When will we know theme camp placement?

Post by zoeypants » Mon Jul 11, 2005 2:47 pm

Anyone know at least an ETA when theme camp placement will be announced?

I'm gettin' antsy - and I like to know where home will be :)

-Zoey-pants
If you're not living on the edge... Your taking up too much space!

helitack
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Post by helitack » Mon Jul 11, 2005 3:48 pm

Yep. No commerce. No freekin mercy either.
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EvilDustBooger
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Post by EvilDustBooger » Mon Jul 11, 2005 5:02 pm

Mercy. Definitely not an option.


(Evil appears at the edge of perimeter with a bloodied white flag)...

..Good evening.
Evil has found your Theme camp..Apokiliptika...of interest.

Requesting protocol for invading...er ..visiting your compound.

I`m sure it may be hard to TRUST someone who goes by the name Evil.
But I assure you I have lovely plans for all.

I thought I may stop in during the Holoca...Event, and chat abit.
I would be bringing my trusted interpreter/interogator Ms. Flatio and of course beverages etc...

Please let me know if such infiltrat...visits are permitted -
Evil doesn`t go where he`s not invited...but you knew that.

Best Regards

helitack
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Post by helitack » Mon Jul 11, 2005 5:21 pm

Yeah well, show up when the Kantina is open, dark thirty or earlier. If yoooz looks young, bring your identity papers. No exceptions.
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EvilDustBooger
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Post by EvilDustBooger » Mon Jul 11, 2005 5:35 pm

I`m plenty old enough.
Any particular mixer/elixir you have trouble keeping in stock?

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Peacekeeper
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Post by Peacekeeper » Mon Jul 11, 2005 5:35 pm

[And it's time to chlorinate yours]


Internal memo 74-75: Threatened Use of Chemical Weapons.

"...the United Nations — particularly the
Security Council — must play its full role in the
multilateral anti-proliferation effort; that is why we
supported the draft resolution from the outset and were
one of its sponsors. With regard to proliferation, the
Security Council draws its legitimacy to act from the
Charter of the United Nations. The proliferation of
weapons of mass destruction and of their means of
delivery is a threat to international peace and security.
To be sure, the Council’s actions must reflect
respect for the existing regime, and that is what it does
in the resolution we have just adopted, by filling a gap
in the regime in the light of a phenomenon that adds an
additional dimension to the danger yadda yadda yadda..."


Recommended action:
Preemptive Strike...

Prepare to be Krushed, deKapitated and disKombobulated Apokalyptika!

Our Mandate cannot be UNdone!



[/quote]

hageymon
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I want our Time Machine BACK!

Post by hageymon » Mon Jul 11, 2005 5:44 pm

Just because I HIT on Mister Jellyfish last year (He IS a CUTE guy, y'know, has a nice butt, and is ALWAYS smiling, so how could I possibly resist?) was NOT a good enough reason for him to STEAL our Mutant Vehicle, along with my Poor Deprived Son's garden tractor, and I will personally LEAD the charge if necessary, against you Evil-Doers! BLOOD will stain the Playa, but not OUR blood! You wicked Bush-Lover-Types will BEG for mercy! Hell hath no fury like the International Burner Hostel Mercenary Troops!

helitack
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Post by helitack » Mon Jul 11, 2005 5:49 pm

By the bloody fact that you cite shite from the unsc, indicates that fear has set in. Neener neener. You are no match for the KA Forces. You have already capitulated. Fear. Pleasure. HaHaaHaaaaaHaaaaaaaa!
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hageymon
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You must not resist!

Post by hageymon » Mon Jul 11, 2005 6:07 pm

For months now, hidden away in the Hills of Bavaria, away from the leering eyes of our foes, our Top-Notch team scientists and visionaries have been developing our SECRET WEAPON!

NOTHING can stop us! You shall be VAPORIZED, leaving no trace of your Mortal Souls!

helitack
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Post by helitack » Mon Jul 11, 2005 6:11 pm

Our Secret designer, Victoria, has our secret weapon. Lacy push up bras. Your boys will become one with the dust. Just like the Sirens, they will extend their arms to touch, and BLAMO, non-existence. When they see the sacred dance of the pole, they will be mezmerized into marmelade. You are no match for our genetically superior women and men.
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