No Expectations

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No Expectations

Post by CaseyBoy » Mon Oct 17, 2016 8:03 am

I've never really wanted to attend a BM but I happened across videos online and now I feel like this is something I have to experience. I am not artistic, can't play an instrument and really have no if I'll ever make it to a BM. I just know I want to try.

I have no expectations of what it will mean to go, I just think that online video isn't enough. My biggest hurdle will be convincing my wife to come as well which will require a shower which appears to be tough without an RV.

Anyways I'm excited about the possibility/possibilities and hope to someday make it to a BM!

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Re: No Expectations

Post by Elderberry » Mon Oct 17, 2016 9:22 am

Hey there, welcome to eplaya!
When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle.
Then I realized that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me

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Re: No Expectations

Post by Ratty » Mon Oct 17, 2016 9:36 am

Caseyboy, Welcome to ePlaya. You have to REALLY want to come to Burning Man. My husband has never had an interest in it. I go alone. Hang out here. Read about everything that interests you. Videos are great but they tend to feature a young crowd with perfect bodies. Look around the BM website. Take a peek at the photo gallery. Do some research and soul searching. Ask questions. Attending the event is a huge commitment in time and money. Have fun. Maybe we'll give you dusty hugs later at the Meet & Greet.
Those aren't buttermilk biscuits I'm lying on Savannah

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Talent hits a target no one else can hit; Genius hits a target no one else can see.
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Re: No Expectations

Post by gaminwench » Mon Oct 17, 2016 11:52 am

One can certainly have a shower out there without bringing an RV.
More reading, less video watching!
"the prophecies of doom were better last year" trilo

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Re: No Expectations

Post by Drawingablank » Mon Oct 17, 2016 3:31 pm


Anyone who needs convincing to attend should probably not be brought there. The environment is at best an ordeal, and can be much worse than that.
Savannah: I don't know what it is, but no thread here escapes alive. You'll get 1 or 2 real answers at minimum, occasionally 10 or 12, and then we flog it until it's unrecognizable and you can't get your deposit back.

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Re: No Expectations

Post by CaseyBoy » Mon Oct 17, 2016 5:30 pm

I really do think she'd enjoy it, generally I've been a little more spontaneous but once she gets to our destination she unwinds. I don't think 2017 will be available for us so I'm shooting for 2018 or 2019 as my, hopefully our, first burn. We'd be traveling from the east coast so it'd be an adventure that's for sure. I'm even thinking of just doing 3-4 days at first to see how it goes, hopefully that's allowed. I'm thinking the shorter stay at first mightime be a happy medium for us.

Like I said this is something that's definitely what most of our friends probably wouldn't see us doing, but that's part of the reason I want to do it! Anyways, we'll see what the future holds and I really hope to meet some of you out there some day!

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Re: No Expectations

Post by Sham » Mon Oct 17, 2016 6:21 pm

Welcome to eplaya and the world of Burning Man.
Take some time to read the preparation guides in my links below. Well worth the read.
Traditionally, if you try to convince someone to attend BM, they are miserable, as it's not their thing and it's not what they expected.
In our camp, we have couples as well as married people attending by themselves.
Just seeing your subject line of "No Expectations", it appears to me that you may have quite a few of them. Prepare for an extreme camping trip and come with an open mind. Everything else is nothing at all like you might expect. It doesn't really matter how many videos you watch.
You might consider joining your local burner group (where are you from on the east coast) and make some friends who will be going.
I hope you take the time to search around here and make yourself at home.


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Re: No Expectations

Post by maladroit » Tue Oct 18, 2016 5:03 pm

No one said it yet? Go to a regional event (there are lots on the east coast). You should be able to pull that off in 2017 as it'll be a much smaller and much closer event. Then see if you and your wife want to attend something 100x as crazy-awesome in 2018.

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Re: No Expectations

Post by JesseBC » Tue Oct 18, 2016 6:57 pm

My husband says his gift to the playa is staying home. An extreme ecosystem, full of heat and dust on a temperate day, is not his idea of a vacation. The most he can muster is that he would like to spend one day cruising the playa in comfort to look at the art as if in a museum. But he knows tourists are unwelcome and not what Burning Man is about, so he doesn't go.

Naturally, I have this little fantasy in which my husband does come with me, and I get to see the look on his face when he sees the playa at night for the first time that everybody wanted to see on MY face the first time I saw it. I imagine it's like being able to see it for the first time all over again. But then I get real, because this is not my husband's thing, and he knows that about himself, and he respects the event enough not to either be a tourist or tag along to try to impress me and then drive everyone within earshot crazy bitching about the weather. *I* don't want to listen to that shit and I love him, so people who don't even know him would probably want to throat-punch a complainer.

Granted, it's not 100% certain. My husband might go and love it, just like there was a possibility the first time that I would go and hate it. But I would strongly encourage you to listen to the people saying that, if your wife doesn't REALLY WANT to go, don't push the issue. The environment is difficult enough, even when you want to be there more than puppies and ice cream.

And there's a very nice reward to going without your spouse. You come home with stories! Lots and lots of stories. When you've been married a long time, it's easy to run out of stories that the other one hasn't already heard, so having new (and totally trippy) stories is a lot of fun that we wouldn't have had if he'd gone with me, and he had plenty of stuff to catch me up on, too (albeit less trippy, but still fun).

Do not bring someone to Burning Man who doesn't powerfully desire to go. It might work out, but you probably have a better chance of winning the lottery.

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Re: No Expectations

Post by CaseyBoy » Wed Oct 19, 2016 7:43 am

Thanks for all the feedback, I definitely don't want to force her to go. I think she would actually enjoy the experience and the people but perhaps that's wishful thinking. For all I know I could hate it but I feel like I wouldn't.

I think the regional idea is a good start for us at least. I know it won't be quite the same but at least it's a sample. Besides I think it will allow us to get to know a little of what the experience can be and an opportunity to meet others.


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