Burningman and the Bible

DE FACTO · Post by **DE FACTO** » Mon Nov 17, 2003 1:30 pm

Only until we've seized the reigns of power and established our cult as a mainstream religion.

The whole world needs Burningman.

Long live DE FACTO....uh Larry......

Blenderhead · Post by **Blenderhead** » Mon Nov 17, 2003 1:44 pm

Zane5100 wrote:
Blenderhead wrote:
Zane5100 wrote:Burning Man should have a bible.

Then we can have something to justify our behavior when we start killing hippies and yahoos by impaling them and making a forest surrounding The Man.

There are examples we can follow.
So, you're saying we have to justify that kind of behavior? Why?
Only until we've seized the reigns of power and established our cult as a mainstream religion.

But... but... that sounds so complicated and time-consuming. What if I just want to off hippies? Can't I just tag along?

Zane5100 · Post by **Zane5100** » Mon Nov 17, 2003 1:44 pm

DE FACTO wrote:The whole world needs Burningman.

Whether they know it or not.

Whether they like it or not.

Zane5100 · Post by **Zane5100** » Mon Nov 17, 2003 1:45 pm

Blenderhead wrote:But... but... that sounds so complicated and time-consuming.

Only at first. It gets easier.

DE FACTO · Post by **DE FACTO** » Mon Nov 17, 2003 1:52 pm

Quote= "Last Real Burner"

"Thread Drift comes with the territory. It's the glue that keeps this place sliding around."

So who's gonna start.

Blenderhead · Post by **Blenderhead** » Mon Nov 17, 2003 1:56 pm

Fine then, count me in. Guess I'll be doing some research in the flamethrower thread.

Come get me if things get exciting.

Zane5100 · Post by **Zane5100** » Mon Nov 17, 2003 3:40 pm

Blenderhead wrote:Fine then, count me in. Guess I'll be doing some research in the flamethrower thread.

Come get me if things get exciting.

Uh, we'll be using impalement as opposed to roasting them en masse.

Sure it takes longer, but you get to enjoy your work for a longer period of time.

Kinetic II · Post by **Kinetic II** » Mon Nov 17, 2003 3:57 pm

Zane5100 wrote:
Blenderhead wrote:Fine then, count me in. Guess I'll be doing some research in the flamethrower thread.

Come get me if things get exciting.
Uh, we'll be using impalement as opposed to roasting them en masse.

Sure it takes longer, but you get to enjoy your work for a longer period of time.

Ok, Vladimir....we're running out of stakes. Could you find a less intensive method of preparation please?

Zane5100 · Post by **Zane5100** » Mon Nov 17, 2003 4:04 pm

No.

Well, I guess crucifixion would do.

TestesInSac · Post by **TestesInSac** » Mon Nov 17, 2003 4:29 pm

Hehe, the other day I put nice long, sharp points on some 1/2" rebar stakes. They'd make nailing people interesting.

Patience · Post by **Patience** » Mon Nov 17, 2003 4:42 pm

Crucifixion takes too long. I'm an instant gratification kind of guy.

How about poisoning?

Kinetic II · Post by **Kinetic II** » Mon Nov 17, 2003 5:12 pm

Patience wrote:Crucifixion takes too long. I'm an instant gratification kind of guy.

How about poisoning?

Still too slow.
Nuclear Annihilation...you might see the flash, if your lucky. That would be the way to go. You never knew what hit you. One minute your driving down the interstate, the next your talking to St. Peter if you believe in those christian fairy tales.

Zane5100 · Post by **Zane5100** » Tue Nov 18, 2003 12:02 am

Patience wrote:Crucifixion takes too long. I'm an instant gratification kind of guy.

How about poisoning?

No! No! No!

The slowness is part of the point!

Goddamn barbarians! <throwing up hands in disgust...>

Raheer · Post by **Raheer** » Wed Nov 19, 2003 5:31 am

Zane5100 wrote:
Patience wrote:Crucifixion takes too long. I'm an instant gratification kind of guy.

How about poisoning?
No! No! No!

The slowness is part of the point!

Goddamn barbarians! <throwing up hands in disgust...>

Finally! SOMEONE sees the light! Er, the darkness... er.. um....

Anyway! The point of killing people is making them suffer as MUCH AS POSSIBLE!!! (The fourteen volt electrical shock directly to the pain centre of the brain has always been my favourite, but slowly skinning a child and dipping her in salt in front of her helpless parents works too...).

Raheer the demonically sadistic

Bob · Post by **Bob** » Wed Nov 19, 2003 6:31 am

BlueBirdPoof wrote:Some years ago, I spent a little time musing on how a new "construct" intended to be a bible could possibly have that real "oral history with really odd lapses" quality that the "actual" bible has.

The best I could come up with was having a succession of people read it and then re-write it a week later without referring to the original, and adding anything else that took their fancy. Revisiting the idea, I see you'd have to have a bunch of rigid idealogues (or "priests") stick in something that really peeves them and blame someone else for it. And then have someone really crazy edit it, while refusing to clarify contradictions.

That seems to have been the model for the Burning Man website -- until they started cleaning it up recently.

DE FACTO · Post by **DE FACTO** » Wed Nov 19, 2003 6:42 am

Bob wrote: That seems to have been the model for the Burning Man website -- until they started cleaning it up recently.

I kind of been thinking of eplaya that way.

Do you think it can happen again but better this time?

There's only a few months before eplaya is a clean slate again.

Badger · Post by **Badger** » Wed Nov 19, 2003 7:51 pm

There's only a few months before eplaya is a clean slate again.

Why's that? Are you leaving?

DE FACTO · Post by **DE FACTO** » Wed Nov 19, 2003 8:54 pm

Badger wrote:
There's only a few months before eplaya is a clean slate again.
Why's that? Are you leaving?

nope.

Isotopia · Post by **Isotopia** » Wed Nov 19, 2003 9:51 pm

damn!

DE FACTO · Post by **DE FACTO** » Wed Nov 19, 2003 9:52 pm

Isotopia wrote:damn!

hey look ....your still funny.

Apollonaris Zeus · Post by **Apollonaris Zeus** » Sat Dec 27, 2003 2:35 pm

Onan was wrongly judge!

Spew some sperm today!

Make a vagina happy every day!

Its is better to give a fuck then to be a fuck!

Have a Happy Playa Day!

A II Z

Lilly Flower · Post by **Lilly Flower** » Sat Jan 03, 2004 1:02 pm

2004 shall be the year that the first chapter of the Burningman Bible will be established.

aforceforgood · Post by **aforceforgood** » Sat Jan 03, 2004 3:40 pm

OOOh, the first prophecy!

I'm scared.

aforceforgood · Post by **aforceforgood** » Sat Jan 03, 2004 3:40 pm

Patience wrote:Can I volunteer to be the editor?

I am usually only slightly crazy, but I am actually crazy when writing.

Hmmm. Given that my entire perception of you consists of your eplaya writings, that explains a lot...

joel the ornery · Post by **joel the ornery** » Sun Jan 04, 2004 7:04 am

Lilly Flower wrote:2004 shall be the year that the first chapter of the Burningman Bible will be established.

whatever.

Tancorix · Post by **Tancorix** » Sun Jan 04, 2004 8:41 am

Cool...something else I can throw on the burn platform and dispose of! And yeah, I'll make sure and take some "holy" ashes home with me.

Last Real Burner · Post by **Last Real Burner** » Sun Jan 04, 2004 10:41 am

God said' "Damn, I need a porto-pottie or something, I'm starting to fill up the universe with my shit. and it was a good thing.

"From the Book of "Shits and Giggles" Chapter 2 - Joke 13"
hymnly,
mr smith

robotland · Post by **robotland** » Thu Jan 08, 2004 5:57 am

.....the concept that comes to mind when I see the words "Burning Man Bible" is of a combination of The Whole Earth Catalog, The Moosewood Cookbook, The Boy Scout Handbook, the transcript from "Viva Los Xmas", a few Bucky essays and the DPW Manual.....ring bound, profusely illustrated, and with a big hole for a 'biner. A pop-up edition could be fun....

Patience · Post by **Patience** » Thu Jan 08, 2004 8:26 am

aforceforgood wrote: Hmmm. Given that my entire perception of you consists of your eplaya writings, that explains a lot...

Ummm.... yer mama?

Chimp · Post by **Chimp** » Thu Jan 08, 2004 10:34 am

Before Burning Man gets a bible p'raps it should have an enema?

Burningman and the Bible

as quoted from another thread

Never waste a good hard-on!

And on the First Day...