i have some baggage

fartoogone · Post by **fartoogone** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 11:03 am

I was wondering if BurningMan is a good place for me to dislodge 32 years of emotional instability and emptiness and manic depressive nightmares.

Maybe I can leave the desert with an empty peaceful mind.

would anyone like to start unloading my baggage?
this will be my first BM

help!

robotland · Post by **robotland** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 11:07 am

I'll bet that if you can express those nightmares in WOOD you won't be the only one that would enjoy watching 'em burn......

fartoogone · Post by **fartoogone** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 11:13 am

well. i also need a Vulcan Mindmeld while im there... I need some BM therapy I think. I have "issues" about cutting things off emotionally with my exes. I feel like I have all these live wire connections around me. Its really frightening. I need some peace of mind. But at the same time, Im scared to be alone.

Simply Joel · Post by **Simply Joel** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 11:16 am

fartoogone wrote: Maybe I can leave the desert with an empty peaceful mind.

would anyone like to start unloading my baggage?

Leave no trace.

fartoogone · Post by **fartoogone** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 11:21 am

oh that really helped. thanx

Alpha · Post by **Alpha** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 11:30 am

Assuming your last post was a serious rebuke of Joel's levity, let me respond with something truly helpful: try counseling. Certainly the sage counsel of a trusted friend is worthwhile, but if you don't have that then I would recommend seeing a professional.

That said, BM is a great place to find new inspiration and bring your head into a better space. It also holds the possibility of putting your worst attributes into a pressure cooker until they eat you from the inside out. In my opinion you need an open mind and a positive attitude to avoid that pitfall. Making a contribution as a volunteer is another great way.

Simply Joel · Post by **Simply Joel** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 11:34 am

Okay, if i must be serious....

Participation is the best medicine...

Be part of something sure beats the hell out of "looking in from the outside."

and in the desert... IT IS ALL OUTSIDE.

is this advice any better?

still, don't leave a trace.

fartoogone · Post by **fartoogone** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 11:38 am

yeah that was better,thanx

Dork · Post by **Dork** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 11:44 am

Burning Man is a great place to shake up your notions of what is important in life and how silly some of your inhibitions may be. It will not change your life but is a decent kick in the butt.

You will not leave with an empty mind. You'll leave with one that is slightly too full and something will have to go. Whether you shed your unwanted baggage to make room or forget what you just learned and go back to your old life is up to you.

Simply Joel · Post by **Simply Joel** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 1:47 pm

It is a camping trip, no more, no less.

Icepack · Post by **Icepack** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 2:00 pm

Simply Joel wrote:It is a camping trip, no more, no less.

When I said that, I got flamed.

Simply Joel · Post by **Simply Joel** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 2:14 pm

Simply Joel wrote:
fartoogone wrote: Maybe I can leave the desert with an empty peaceful mind.

would anyone like to start unloading my baggage?
Leave no trace.

Actually, I was serious, no levity intended.

Ivy · Post by **Ivy** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 2:24 pm

Simply Joel wrote:
It is a camping trip, no more, no less.

When I said that, I got flamed.

That's becuase it's not just a camping trip. It's just a fucking camping trip. i mean you're leaving out the msot importnant part.

As far as "baggage" goes:

BM is NOT an end-all, be-all, solve all your problems, answer all your questions event. It's not really any different than any other (fucking) camping trip--you can find enlighteninment or you can go home even more depressed.
The phrase "no expectations"? It exists for a reason. I highly suggest you keep it in mind when thinking about your trip to BM. If you go into the experience "expecting" to dislodge all your bagge and come out "cured" (for lack of a better word), I ahve a feeling you'll be sorely disappointed and perhaps even suffer more than you migth currently. If you look at it as a place to maybe try and see things a new of different way, you migth have a better chance.
But BM can't "fix" you. Only you can do that. BM might help. So might any number of things. Only you can know.

ps> I agree with the "leave no trace" bit, also.

Isotopia · Post by **Isotopia** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 2:33 pm

Quote:

would anyone like to start unloading my baggage?
this will be my first BM

No. No thank you.

Your baggage, your load. You pack it in and YOU unload it.

We'll stand around and watch you burn it though. Probably celebrate right along with you should certain metaphorical type things start happening. Hope something comes about as a result but as was mentioned don't go there expecting it to happen as you'd have it or you set yourself up for disappointment and all that goes along with unmet expectations.

A new/different handle might be appropriate. Just my .02 but it suggests that you're already buying into the idea that something has gone past a certain point of no return.

ronski · Post by **ronski** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 2:39 pm

Dork wrote:It will not change your life but is a decent kick in the butt..

Well, it can change your life. It did mine. I no longer wear underwear.

So, just what those changes ARE, or how PROFOUND you consider them to be... is up to you.

Dork wrote:You will not leave with an empty mind. You'll leave with one that is slightly too full and something will have to go. Whether you shed your unwanted baggage to make room or forget what you just learned and go back to your old life is up to you.

Reminds me of an interesting anecdote from The Maltese Falcon, about a man named Flitcraft:

http://www.princeton.edu/~cupright/parable-hammett.html

Maybe BM will be like a falling beam for you. Or not.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 3:44 pm

manic depressive nightmares

May I suggest Lithium or Depakote? BiPolar is (to me) so obviously a bio-chemical regulation problem that a chemical approach seems appropriate. I tried to tough it out with depression for many years. Many wasted years, I might say in retrospect. BM is fun, but not nessesarily a good place for active mental illness.

Isotopia · Post by **Isotopia** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 4:22 pm

BM is fun, but not nessesarily a good place for active mental illness.

I'd ammend that to crippling(sp?) mental illness.

PurpleKoosh · Post by **PurpleKoosh** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 7:38 pm

Here's a thought....

Run an Emotional Baggage Check. (I'd do it myself, but don't have the resources.) Set yourself up with a burn barrel behind you, and a counter in front. Alongside the counter have an array of "suitcases" (cardboard/wooden boxes w/handles) of various sizes. Your customer grabs a suitcase and a Sharpie, and labels it with their baggage. They hand you the baggage, you hand them a claim check, and toss the bag in the barrel.

(I'll give proper credit for the idea once I'm home and can look up the original Usenet post I stole it from....)

Don Muerto · Post by **Don Muerto** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 8:13 pm

I was wondering if BurningMan is a good place for me to dislodge 32 years of emotional instability and emptiness and manic depressive nightmares.

For the most part, I would say that Burningman has a diabolical ability to disappoint your expectations in direct proportion to their size.

If you go there looking to be 'cured' by the magic of the playa or it's inhabitants, then I daresay you will come home disappointed and much poorer for the experience. If you go there without any expectation and simply open yourself up to whatever happens then I think you will come home changed. Whether this is for better or worse might take some months to sort out.

Really though, I think the kind of healing you need to do can just as viably be approached off the playa as on, and in fact, I think the spectacle and tough physical environment of Burningman may keep you from dealing with your issues at all. Ultimately you will succeed only when you turn that gaze inward and begin unraveling the knot you keep bumping into. If I see you on the playa I will help you pull on some threads.

Alchemy · Post by **Alchemy** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 9:26 pm

Is it carry on?Because I always over pack for Burningman...hahahahaha

The baggage car on the guilt train or your train of thought can be packed to the rafters,do you need a sky cap to load your passage or pass outage? I serve sky vodka to my fellow nerotics on this exotic trip.

Bring a wooden crate ,lets stuff it with effigies of yer previous trips and after a few martinis and some utterings of mumbo and a jumbo mumbo we torch the fucker and youll feeeeeeeeeeeeeel so much better.

Year before last , one of the theme camps bought my "stuff"with a playa check. I got to dump and unload alot of the crap Ive been carrying, and quite frankly after they took it and burned on the night of the burn I felt so much better....I wrote down alot of it which was pretty hard because of the personal issues involved. But Id say 90 5 of my damage went the way of the flyin ember before I left.

Bring it in, Tow it all out,but if its physcoclutter and regrets..BURN IT and MOVE ON! If you would like so help let me know.
Alchemy

LeChatNoir · Post by **LeChatNoir** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 9:54 pm

toofargone wrote:would anyone like to start unloading my baggage?

Baggage....

Ah yes...

We all have our baggage. Some put wheels under it and others choose to chain it to their ankles and drag it along. But we never really get rid of it, we just deal with it and keep moving. Things happen and nothing can change the past, nor should you want it to. Simply part of your path.

When I first became aware of Burning Man many years ago, I really, really wanted to go. I couldn’t (and still cannot) explain why, other than I just wanted to. In the same way that sometimes I want to get up and draw in my sketch book when the muse speaks in the middle of the night. Regardless of the intense yearning, every year the pieces didn't fall into place and I don't believe they were supposed to. I was in a place where I was healing, but still off balance. And I was learning to live in a world that I was totally unaccustomed to. All my life I’d had others around me and now I was in a new place (literally and figuratively) learning to live with the most difficult roommate of all... my own self. Someone who I'd never really stopped to look at before.

Initially the thought of floating out in space all by your lonesome is a terrifying thing. Alone out in the atmosphere and drifting. Letting go of those old safety ropes is tough to do. They may be anchors that hurt to hold onto, but at least they’re anchors you are familiar with and not as scary as the unknown........ but only at first. Don’t fear. I bid to all those in my past a fond fair well and ceased to cling to them. I started looking forward into my own journey, instead of back. There are many wonderful people out there along your path, friend.

You won’t find your peace in the desert, you won’t find it anywhere on the physical face of this Earth. It rests within you and only there. Everything else will only be things to help you understand, learn, and grow. I’d say begin your healing now. Don’t wait until Burning Man (or anything else) to start looking for it. Then you can simply go out into the world and see what’s waiting for you there. And I second the idea of bringing symbols to burn. Commiting things to fire can be powerful.

I've continued to just go with the flow and I’m finally making it to the playa this year, and I’m glad it has taken so long.

I hope to see you out there, Brian...

Peace and good luck to you.

Badger · Post by **Badger** » Mon Apr 26, 2004 10:58 pm

Quote:

If you go there looking to be 'cured' by the magic of the playa or it's inhabitants, then I daresay you will come home disappointed and much poorer for the experience.

<with no judgement intended...> The playa is oft littered with such folks. Waiting, wanting, hoping for the epiphany that's seemed to have passed them by for the seven days of the event.

Quote:

If I see you on the playa I will help you pull on some threads.

As will a few tens of thousand other folk I can think of.[/quote]

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Tue Apr 27, 2004 3:38 pm

in all seriousness, I think you ought to include text from your OP here in your OP requesting a ride from Seattle. Your potential ridemates need to know this about you.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Apr 27, 2004 5:28 pm

There is a way to escape, depression, drug addiction etc,

Badger · Post by **Badger** » Tue Apr 27, 2004 7:04 pm

I think you ought to include text from your OP here in your OP requesting a ride from Seattle.

At this point I'm not convinced that the OP need do this. I guess it's because I know more than a few folks who'd make a blanket statement about themselves similar to one initiating this thread. Feeling you have baggage that needs to be exorcised by going to the playa is NOT an unusual modus operandi in my experience. Hell, it was the prime motivating factor for me for four years in a row. But that's another story.

<off topic>In some ways, I can't imagine a bteer place to cast forth the demons than by going to the Lahanton playa. Maybe going to the event isn't the best time to go there but certainly going to the desert is a damn good start in this writer's judgement.

Literature is damn near pregnant with examples of people who made the sojourn for this very purpose.

A few books that come to mind are from my readings of a class I took a few years ago called Desert Practice. Most remarkable of them are the following: Desert Solitaire by Edward Abbey, The Sheltering Sky by Paul Bowles, Red by Terry Tempest Williams and finally Nature and Madness by Paul Williams.

Have a look. I think anyone's experience on the playa might be elevated somewhat by giving these a once over.

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Tue Apr 27, 2004 7:04 pm

that's some funny shit rev

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Tue Apr 27, 2004 7:06 pm

In some ways, I can't imagine a bteer place to cast forth the demons than by going to the Lahanton playa.

I very much agree. However, would you disagree that a very bad place to start excorsising those demons is on a 14+ hour road trip with strangers?

Badger · Post by **Badger** » Tue Apr 27, 2004 7:16 pm

However, would you disagree that a very bad place to start excorsising those demons is on a 14+ hour road trip with strangers?

Not if you rode in the trunk.

Captain Goddammit · Post by **Captain Goddammit** » Tue Apr 27, 2004 11:05 pm

I think going to BM will likely help with letting go of past relationships. After my first BM trip (Burning Man, not Bowel Movement, but hey, either one...) I involuntarily divided all of my friends into 2 classes, Burners and Non-burners. The "nons" are still my friends, but there's something more about the burners.
Your exes will be in the Non-burner category. That might help you get past them. And even if you show up alone, you will leave with a whole bunch of new friends.
I've arrived in BRC alone a few times, but never stayed that way long.
I see you're here in Seattle; maybe the 2nd or 3rd largest population of Burners is here. If you aren't already all tuned in, send me a message and I'll gather up some links and clue you in on where the local burners hang out, and when the big regional event is comin' up.

III · Post by **III** » Wed Apr 28, 2004 2:22 am

>>Your exes will be in the Non-burner category.

well, that's a bit presumtuous. it could be that the exes are the burners, and he isn't.

(which is completely toungue in cheek. lord knows there are plenty of reasons to break up which have nothing to do with whether you're a burner or not. otherwise, all those playa formed relationships would just flourish, right?)

i have some baggage

i have some baggage

humm

Re: i have some baggage

oh

better

camping trip...

Re: i have some baggage

Where's my baggage ticket?

About yer baggage...

Escape