tell me a story

Trishntek · Post by **Trishntek** » Sun Apr 03, 2011 10:22 am

,,,, the bidet spray filled the mouths of the vocalists in the midst of the word they were singing,,, it was the word ALL and the spray went deeply into their throats causing them to choke and cough. But when they realized how good the spray tasted,,,, being awash with juices of Bliss,,,, they,,,,

Sail Man · Post by **Sail Man** » Sun Apr 03, 2011 12:04 pm

swallowed. And dropping to their knee's they began to paw at each other, tearing clothing off whomever was nearest them. And above them all, watching with a bemused smile, stood......

OnceTheDustClears · Post by **OnceTheDustClears** » Mon Apr 04, 2011 8:36 am

...a lone masked figure...arms outstretched.

As the dust cleared and the glistening form was revealed,
the assembled crowd gasped and then hushed and then as if by magic
chanted in unison "...

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Mon Apr 04, 2011 8:39 am

" OOOOhhhhh.........I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Wiener"............

OnceTheDustClears · Post by **OnceTheDustClears** » Mon Apr 04, 2011 8:48 am

And thus began the marathon rendition of the infamous gyrating pulsating
Wiener Dance.

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Mon Apr 04, 2011 9:16 am

[youtube][/youtube]

OnceTheDustClears · Post by **OnceTheDustClears** » Mon Apr 04, 2011 9:26 am

It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. In fact...

OnceTheDustClears · Post by **OnceTheDustClears** » Mon Apr 04, 2011 10:46 am

Although many covered their eyes and ran screaming into the night and others collapsed to the dust in shock and confusion, still others were inspired to dust off their own wieners and begin a dance of their own.

One of the merry band of Weenie Wankers out to show off his shenanigans was none other than....

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Fri Apr 29, 2011 10:15 pm

the weenie wankerest funster of them all.
since being jerked off his throne, as king of Saturday morning programming, he retreated to the desert........working tirelessly, day and night......night and day.
And this, was his first opportunity, in front of a massing audience, to............

Sail Man · Post by **Sail Man** » Sat Apr 30, 2011 4:06 pm

rip off his clothes and reveal that he had become a she, and that he was the lover of none other then.....

OnceTheDustClears · Post by **OnceTheDustClears** » Sat Apr 30, 2011 6:14 pm

...King Kong. Who although very large had a tiny singing voice. It was surprisingly melodic and seemed to draw people from near and far. One person in particular was so entranced by his voice that his lover became jealous. An argument ensued and names were called. Pee Wee (a misnomer to be sure) was heard to shout "why you are nothing but a..."

littleflower · Post by **littleflower** » Sat Apr 30, 2011 7:14 pm

.... little flower. it takes a REAL m ...er, woman to handle king kong .... his voice may be sweet, and his scent lovely, but his .....

Sail Man · Post by **Sail Man** » Sun May 01, 2011 3:14 pm

credit cards were all platinum cards, and we all know that she was a woman who preferred Sax Fifth Avenue over Sex any day of the week, except on....

OnceTheDustClears · Post by **OnceTheDustClears** » Sun May 01, 2011 3:24 pm

Taco Tuesdays. They would happily gorge themselves until...

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Sat May 14, 2011 8:30 pm

Godzilla returns:

and he's pissed 'cause you know, you can't serve good Mexican food in Japan, it'll create a worm hole.
Speaking of worm holes.....................

goathead · Post by **goathead** » Sun May 15, 2011 4:22 am

No, Superman cannot ride in your cheeks as you run around with him! Now, take him out, and pull your pants up!

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Sun May 15, 2011 6:43 am

goathead wrote:No, Superman cannot ride in your cheeks as you run around with him! Now, take him out, and pull your pants up!

Said the wiley Goat/Sexmaster.
And, as he was admonishing Shambala, for it was he running away from Superman (or so it appeared), sans panties, we all knew this was but the first, of many entertaining twists we'd encounter, here, at camp....................

FIGJAM · Post by **FIGJAM** » Sun May 15, 2011 10:38 am

...Dunmanifesten, where tired artists go to retire.

But thier addictive creativity would not let them stop calaberating to build the.......

OnceTheDustClears · Post by **OnceTheDustClears** » Sun May 15, 2011 7:06 pm

...most exquisite...most enthralling...most comforting
well, simply the very best ever
Port-a-potty
ever to be erected on the playa.
It was so luxurious that one could even...

Elorrum · Post by **Elorrum** » Sun May 15, 2011 7:44 pm

use two ply toilet paper, as much as you wanted. But it was early in the week, and who knew how it would be abused by the end of the week. The dilemma was whether to slap a padlock on it while it was still clean, or...

goathead · Post by **goathead** » Mon May 16, 2011 4:15 am

load it with fireworks, fuel and make it the new base for the MAN.

But before DPW could start with their new project, the HAT showed up and said.....

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Mon May 16, 2011 6:19 am

"where's the bidet? I want my bidet! youz guyz promised me a bidet, and I want it.........."
Stamping his feet and kicking dirt.

All the poor, meek and timid DPW workers could do, was improvise.

So, they sent for a fire truck and a woven lawn chair.

Just as they were instructing "The Hat" in the process and use of said improvised equipment (getting a volunteer, milk crate and garden sprayer for an test/instructive run), a large screeching noise was heard.

and who, of all people, came out of "First Camp" mad as hell and wonder why they weren't invited was............

OnceTheDustClears · Post by **OnceTheDustClears** » Mon May 16, 2011 11:28 am

Santa. There was no ho ho-ing and he was definitely not jolly. He was ranting something about dust in his nether regions and was demanding to use the fire hose. Just as he dropped his drawers and bent over to illustrate his problem...

FIGJAM · Post by **FIGJAM** » Mon May 16, 2011 1:03 pm

one of the fine ladies in the critical tits ride parked her bike in what she thought was a very creative bike rack.

At which point santa exclaimed "Is that you.....

Bin Noddin · Post by **Bin Noddin** » Mon May 16, 2011 8:02 pm

... Louis? ...
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littleflower · Post by **littleflower** » Mon May 16, 2011 9:20 pm

.... but the fine, topless vixen just kept tooting on her horn, and soon a flute came 'round to play, and an oboe ..... but when a lady with a tuba appeared .....

gaminwench · Post by **gaminwench** » Mon May 16, 2011 10:49 pm

followed by a marching bassoonist...and a gamelan played by monkeys...

Bin Noddin · Post by **Bin Noddin** » Tue May 17, 2011 7:20 am

. . . made Louis shout "Aren't you guys supposed to by typing 'Ulyses'"? But the monkeys shouted back "we finished that, we're now on to . . .

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Tue May 17, 2011 7:31 am

writing Chinese instruction manuals. They say we am vely good on it, maybe go for see doctor sometimes.

And so, the monkey kept banging away on their typewriters, and, the band played on.

As day became night, night melted to morning, and again darkness fell, the crowd noticed an omnipresent sound, seemingly emanating from everywhere, and nowhere.
Almost that of a Gregorian chant, sung by hundreds, nay, thousands of small, but "BASSO PROFUNDO" voiced monks.

What is that tune, the crowd murmured..........
until, someone announced:
I recognize that song, from long ago, and far away.....it's..........

OnceTheDustClears · Post by **OnceTheDustClears** » Tue May 17, 2011 7:55 am

...the theme song from The Smurfs animated mini series being blasted incessantly from Saturday morning cartoons and cereal camp. A flash mob of blue people began to...