Where the fuck does this go?

[geekster]

Urban myth busted:

http://www.geekosystem.com/5-fridays-sa ... 823-years/

There are only 14 different possible calendars, one that starts on each day of the week for leap years, and one that starts on each day of the week for non leap years.

It is baloney.

[can't sit still]

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/nat ... clecontent

[knowmad]

[gyre]

The primal urge to burn effigies?

[gyre]

Al-Qa'ida has faith in only two things.

We are Federal Express.


http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-11657486

[gojrracing]

Hi SonOfUgly. I agree with you. LOL

[Sham]

[lucky420]

hahhaha thanks for the chuckle Shambala

[Fire_Moose]

It is more than 1,000 yards long, covers 20 acres, had a 115ft deep end and holds 66 million gallons of water // located in Chile // cost a whopping $1.5-billion to build

[Sham]

Man orders 178 pizzas from a shop and never picks up the order.

http://www.cbs3springfield.com/news/loc ... 35394.html

[Aiee! It burns!]

It is more than 1,000 yards long, covers 20 acres, had a 115ft deep end and holds 66 million gallons of water // located in Chile // cost a whopping $1.5-billion to build

Long and skinny like Chile!

[Sham]

[youtube][/youtube]

[Sail Man]

Well now, there's an altoids survival kit I haven't seen before LOL

[can't sit still]

Cream,,, as you've never heard them;

[Dr. Pyro]

"THEY'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!"
"The Only E-Zine You Should Ever Bother To Read"
DISCUSSION 61: A Discussion With Satan

As long-time readers of this brilliant column, you have naturally come to expect only the finest in literary prose and deeply insightful reasoning. In that regard, I have some very happy news to report. I have just invented the Shroomatron 3000. This miraculous device not only allows me to travel through time, but through what I like to call "interdimensional faiths" as well. What that means to you, kind reader, is that I can not only have first-hand discussions with the likes of Hitler, Atilla the Hun, and Charlemagne; but also Jesus Christ, Mohammed, and Satan. So I have stepped into and fired up the Shroomatron 3000 and am heading out to have a frank discussion with the Lord of the Underworld, Beelzebub, The Prince of Darkness himself: Satan!

As an introduction as to how this new and magical process will work, it will be in a format much like a talk-show host might have with a guest star. I will ask the Devil a question, and he will respond. And when it's all said and done I will have the usual The Point Is Made final analysis of the discussion. Doesn't that sound like fun? So it's off to fire-and-brimstone land for this month's enlightening discussion with Satan.

ME: So tell me Satan, since you are considered to be The Prince of Darkness, wouldn't having had a better publicist been in your best interests?

SATAN: Fuck you, whitey. You think it's easy being me? Well shit-for-brains, do you? I worked long and hard to be the most despised figure through the past two millennia, and if some cocksucker doesn't like it, he can kiss my red pointy-tailed ass.

ME: So let me get this straight. You actually enjoy being thought of as the anti-Christ?

SATAN: Fuckin-A I do! Look around you, see all my smiling sycophants whose only ambition is to please me? Beats being some shithead greater at Wal-Mart. You see, here in hell I can drink all the beer I want, fuck whatever bimbo God has decided should be tormented for eternity, and the next morning I wake up without a hangover and work on my golf game. I bet you didn't know I was an eight handicap?

ME: Well, I'll be damned. Uh, I mean darned. I never really considered that aspect of eternal damnation. So what was it like beating the shit out of Jesus Christ? I heard he can really take a punch.

SATAN: You mean that faggot Son of God bullshit? He's a fucking pansy. And I have some real news for you: Charlie Manson really is Jesus Christ. Remember when all his whore minion followers called him Jesus? It's because it was true! Just look at that motherfucker. He looks just like old J.C. What people don't realize is that Jesus got all the good publicity because his family ran the news business. Yeah, the entire media. You knew they were a bunch of fucking Jew kikes, right? Just like the assholes who run CBS and MSNBC today. So they spun this crap about raising the dead and feeding the hungry. Complete horseshit. Jesus was a whimpering homo who got his ass kicked all over Palestine. Biggest pussy I ever met.

ME: Well, you know Satan, I'll be seeing Mr. Christ probably sometime in the near future. I'll be sure to convey that message.

SATAN: You do that. And when you do, tell that little halo-wearing fudge packer that if he wants a piece of me, he knows where I'll be. Fucking fairy.

ME: Changing the subject for a moment, it has been said that throughout recorded history you have come down on the side of tyrants and dictators, awful people who mass murdered their own countrymen. Any truth to that?

SATAN: You betcha! I'll tell you what, despots really know how to party! You haven't lived until you've snorted a big fat line with Himmler or hung out with Caligula. That dude would throw the best orgies in the vomitorium, and if we happened to kill the sluts they dragged in, no one gave a shit. And they always had the best wine. Coke, wine, and whores. It sure doesn't suck being me. I mean, who wouldn't want to be me?

ME: Well, I can certainly see the upside. Any final thoughts for our readers? I'll let you have the last word.

SATAN: Only two words that matter: Obey me! You may render under Caesar what is Caesar's, but you will owe your eternal soul to me! As darkness spreads across the land, with pestilence and starvation the order of the day, you will rue the day you did not forsake God and let me lead you into the promised land of fire and everlasting damnation! Now be gone or I will send your cocksucking motherfucking ass straight to Hades.

The point is made: Satan is one short-tempered mother. I think everyone will agree that maybe eternal damnation would suck, but clearly following the teachings of Christ is a bad idea as well. So allow me to give a compromise: Maybe the Catholics had it right all along and Purgatory is the place to be. Not too hot, not too cold, with plenty of company. Certainly worthy of consideration.

When I read it I at least thought it was funny. Offensive, but funny.

[Aiee! It burns!]

Will we be able to talk to Satan at your theme camp?

[Dr. Pyro]

Why should this upcoming year be any different?

[Neutrality]

One of these things is not like the other, one of these things is not quite the same.

XXXX

I'm going to hell.

This will even things out for you:

[youtube] [/youtube]

I tried to find the courage to view that, I really did.

[Sham]

[youtube][/youtube]

[can't sit still]

Here are some quotes from a study.
"The unattractive children were more likely to have sons"
"data showed that young adults who identified themselves as "very liberal" had an average IQ of 106 while those who identified themselves as "very conservative" had an average IQ of 95. "
"Having sons reduces the likelihood of divorce"
"Many middle aged men go through a mid-life crisis but not because they are middle aged. It is because their wives are."
"Men sexually harass women because they are not sexist"

This is from a researcher at the London School of economics.
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/scien ... 46994.html

[The CO]

... It happens once in 823 years.

Or, every 5 to 11 years. To any month with 31 days. Starting on a Sunday.

[can't sit still]

Who knows?

This came in mail.
90# on your telephone

I dialed '0' to check this out, and the operator confirmed that this was correct, so please pass it on.. (l also checked out snopes.com. This is true, and also applies to cell phones!)

PASS ON TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW

I received a telephone call last evening from an individual identifying himself as an AT&T Service Technician (could also be Telus) who was conducting a test on the telephone lines. He stated that to complete the test I should touch nine (9), zero (0), the pound sign (#), and then hang up. Luckily, I was suspicious and refused.

Upon contacting the telephone company, I was informed that by pushing 90#, you give the requesting individual full access to your telephone line, which enables them to place long distance calls billed to your home phone number.

I was further informed that this scam has been originating from many local jails/prisons. DO NOT press 90# for ANYONE...

The GTE Security Department requested that I share this information with EVERYONE I KNOW.

After checking with Verizon they also said it was true, so do not dial 90# for anyone !!!!! PLEASE HIT THAT FORWARD BUTTON AND PASS THIS ON TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW

[Simon of the Playa]

Hmmm, now who would do that?


goddammit CSS, why cant you follow simple instructions?

[Eric]

Who knows?

This came in mail.
90# on your telephone

I dialed '0' to check this out, and the operator confirmed that this was correct, so please pass it on.. (l also checked out snopes.com. This is true, and also applies to cell phones!)

Snopes quite plainly says that it does not apply to cell phones, or most residences. It is partially true, however.

This scam does not affect residential or cell phone customers — it only applies to businesses, hospitals, government agencies, and other organizations that still use telephone private branch exchanges (PBXs) rather than Centrex lines to handle their calls. On certain PBX systems (i.e., ones for which pressing '9' is the signal to obtain an outside line, and there are no restrictions placed on outgoing calls), a scammer could gain access to place expensive, long-distance phone calls by tricking an employee into initiating the #-9-0 sequence. Outside of a few other settings where one might have to press '9' to obtain an outside line (such as hotels), the likely result of pressing #-9-0 will simply be a fast busy signal.

I love rumors that say "don't check Snopes, I did it for you"- those are usually the ones that are wrong and a sure sign it needs to be double checked.

[can't sit still]

Thanks Eric !

[can't sit still]

A vid from NYC;

[ygmir]

[can't sit still]

Tis the season for ice fishing;
http://www.rense.com/icef.html

[can't sit still]

This is an excellent article concerning drug addiction and childhood problems.
"The hardcore drug addicts that I treat,,,,,I don’t have a single female patient in the Downtown Eastside who wasn’t sexually abused, [as a child]

http://www.energybulletin.net/stories/2 ... order-and-

[Simon of the Playa]

anybody who relies on Rense.com for info is unreliable in my book...FYI