Elliot's Bicycle Service & Tap Room

[GreyCoyote]

Kowtow!!!

About fooking time hou showed-up here.

Btw: Figjam has been secretly calling you "normal". I think I'd take offense.

[Sunbeam56]

I have ideas!!! (Lightbulb).
But i am not mechanically inclined.
I want some spinning, whirling, tooting, ringing and clanking things with belts and cogs and fan blades and stuff that can be bolted on a golf cart framed art vehicle....

[Elliot]

I have ideas!!! (Lightbulb).
But i am not mechanically inclined.
I want some spinning, whirling, tooting, ringing and clanking things with belts and cogs and fan blades and stuff that can be bolted on a golf cart framed art vehicle....

This guy may be able to help....

[FIGJAM]

Kowtow!!!

About fooking time hou showed-up here.

Btw: Figjam has been secretly calling you "normal". I think I'd take offense.

Slander sir!!!

I take note.

[kowtow]

Would that be NORML (National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws)? I'll take that as a compliment Sir.

Would a 6:00am visit to a dominatrix qualify as normal? If so then I'm your "normal" guy!

You can't leave all the fun on the playa!!!

[kowtow]

Where is unjon hiding since he left the playa? What little we've chatted the man acts almost like a broken stallion.

Hell he seems almost civil compared to the piss and vinegar that he was misting the playa with.

[msj2u]

Would that be NORML (National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws)? I'll take that as a compliment Sir.

Would a 6:00am visit to a dominatrix qualify as normal? If so then I'm your "normal" guy!

You can't leave all the fun on the playa!!!

kowtow,

First it's Dominatrix....and Second, I thought you said 6:00 P.M.????

MSJ (nice meeting you)

[kowtow]

kowtow,

First it's Dominatrix....and Second, I thought you said 6:00 P.M.????

MSJ (nice meeting you)

Sorry, you're right it's DOMINATRIX but no I just confirmed it is in fact 6:00A.M. tomorrow with Mistress Boadicea... 3 hours of mimosa's, Voodoo Donuts, Wartenberg wheels, violet wand, riding crops, saran wrap and the like... I'm just looking forward to the aftercare that's always provided. Crap T-minus 8 hours 39 minutes and counting... Wish me luck...

msj2u, How long until we meet again? Hmmm....

[msj2u]

kowtow,

First it's Dominatrix....and Second, I thought you said 6:00 P.M.????

MSJ (nice meeting you)

Sorry, you're right it's DOMINATRIX but no I just confirmed it is in fact 6:00A.M. tomorrow with Mistress Boadicea... 3 hours of mimosa's, Voodoo Donuts, Wartenberg wheels, violet wand, riding crops, saran wrap and the like... I'm just looking forward to the aftercare that's always provided. Crap T-minus 8 hours 39 minutes and counting... Wish me luck...

msj2u, How long until we meet again? Hmmm....

Dang kowtow!

Please tell Me there will be floggers, wax, ice, and paddles?? Wishing you the best time (totally jealous)!! and yeah, aftercare...well yummm *winks*

Well, since you have a Domme....I'm guessing it will be burn 2015!

MSJ

[FIGJAM]

Retrofrolic can and WILL do all of that for you!!!

[Elliot]

Aaaaaand... we now return to our regularly scheduled program, in progress....

Looks like we will have a new Bicycle Technician in camp next year, in the form of my friend Al from Colorado. He and his lovely-and-talented bride Tamara have accepted the invitation to join us. They have been Burning for many years, and Al is a serious bicyclist whom I know from Kinetic Sculpture Racing.

And our old ePlaya friends Barb Wire (Sven-Erik) and his lovely-and-talented bride Carla are also considering joining. Sven-Erik is a veteran of Camp Herring and Terminal City, and he says he can handle some bicycle repair.

[Sunbeam56]

My-my-my.... Chuck goes to New Orleans and Kowtow goes to a slave cave....

Back to bikes... Elliot, among the loot MeatHunter gifted are various extra bike parts !!!!
My eyes were too full of his generosity to take inventory, but its huge!!!!

[Elliot]

My-my-my.... Chuck goes to New Orleans and Kowtow goes to a slave cave....

Back to bikes... Elliot, among the loot MeatHunter gifted are various extra bike parts !!!!
My eyes were too full of his generosity to take inventory, but its huge!!!!

Wondermuss!
But not entirely surprising, since he is a very nice chap, and he has watched our doings from across the street for two or three years, and has visited a number of times, so he knows what we do.

MeatHunter, on behalf of all the "end users" of these parts, I thank you!

[chuckularone]

Sunbeam!
I have yet to recover. Not from the alcohol either. I have a turbo-charged, industrial strength liver!

[kowtow]

My-my-my.... Chuck goes to New Orleans and Kowtow goes to a slave cave....

Since this is eplaya - the forum for The Man. Everyone knows that anything goes at Burning Man. Where does one go to spew random deviant stories about being beaten and humiliated at the hands of a 5'11", 23 year old, blonde, blue-eyed, Scandinavian who has a bent for Comic Con?

[chuckularone]

Where does one go to spew random deviant stories about being beaten and humiliated at the hands of a 5'11", 23 year old, blonde, blue-eyed, Scandinavian who has a bent for Comic Con?

Right here will do. Or start a thread in the "Open Discussion" section

[GreyCoyote]

Since this is eplaya - the forum for The Man. Everyone knows that anything goes at Burning Man. Where does one go to spew random deviant stories about being beaten and humiliated at the hands of a 5'11", 23 year old, blonde, blue-eyed, Scandinavian who has a bent for Comic Con?

Well, here is good, and I just made some popcorn, so... TELL!

[kowtow]

Well, here is good, and I just made some popcorn, so... TELL!

It started when I brought all the fixin's for mimosa's and her favorite donuts (plain cake and plain cake with chocolate). I wanted to please my mistress before I even had met her....

Arriving at the location just before 6:00am I punch in the gate code # which allows me to enter her sanctorium. With uneasiness I swing the gate open and wonder if it's going to lock behind me and not let me out. Assuming at this point I've gone this far, I decide a locked gate is the least of my worries. After all she's a professional right? It's not like I'm the first individual to enter her lair. I walk across the drive with my hands full. In one hand is a cooler filled with ice, champagne, orange juice and two glass flutes, in the other hand a box of a 1/2 dozen Krispy Kreme donuts that aren't even 30 minutes old and specifically chosen to please said "never before met" mistress.

As I arrive at the door, there are no signs that she's anticipating my arrival. There are no lights that I notice, or anything that leads me to believe I'm at the proper location. I can't decide if I should knock on the door or ring the bell. I opt for a soft knock, possibly so that I have a reason to leave if she doesn't hear my greeting. Three subtle raps on the door and nothing in return. I can't hear a sound, not a scoot of a chair or shuffle of papers, not even a "just a minute" acknowledgement that I've arrived at the right location. My mind races frantically with unforeseen possibilities... Is this the right location, will some big burly guy answer the door? What the hell do I say... Is this some sick prank or even something more deviant that's been pulled on me? What if I've fallen for some sting operation elaborately crafted by local authorities to crackdown on something they obviously can't curtail let alone put an end to? In the end I stand my ground for what seems like an hour, but was more than likely less than 15 seconds...

[Elliot]

Suddenly the door swings open with a crash, and there stands Elliot, Chief Mechanic and Original Poster of the thread, with wrenches in his hands, and commands all those present to Get Back To Work And Repair More Bicycles!

And that was the end of the unsavory thread drift, and everyone lived happily ever after.

[FIGJAM]

Suddenly the door swings open with a crash, and there stands Elliot, Chief Mechanic and Original Poster of the thread, with wrenches in his hands, and commands all those present to Get Back To Work And Repair More Bicycles!

And that was the end of the unsavory thread drift, and everyone lived happily ever after.

I saw this one coming!!!

Elliot's agenda is THE agenda for this thread.

[kowtow]

How could anyone expect anything less? It is fun to fuck with the proprietor every now and then just to see if he's on his toes.

Now where did I lay that fucking spoke wrench... found it!

[unjonharley]

Yesterday I noticed a flat wrench.. That has been hanging on the shop wall. It's from a table saw long gone.. Found it fits the fork post on most of my bikes.. Flat wrenches are essential to bike repair..

I have seen it but not seeing it for 15 years..

[perils]

I would like to thank Elliot for fixing my bike and my neighbor's bike. It was VERY much appreciated, since I made the mistake of bringing my husband's tool kit instead of mine, thereby leaving myself with NO way to remove my back wheel. I would like to thank Martini Steve for being a very nice greeter, and unjonharley for being a wonderful host. Thank you all. It was a pleasure.

[Elliot]

Yesterday I noticed a flat wrench.. That has been hanging on the shop wall. It's from a table saw long gone.. Found it fits the fork post on most of my bikes.. Flat wrenches are essential to bike repair..
...

Yes. Thin open-end wrenches are needed in several places on bicycles.

First we have the pedals, which take a 15 mm wrench. A regular wrench will work on some pedals, but others require a thin one. Obviously, this tool is called a pedal wrench.

Next we have wheel bearings. Each bearing has a "cone" (actually the inner bearing-race) and a lock-nut. The cone and the lock-nut require very thin wrenches, known as cone wrenches. They range from 13 mm to 17 mm.

Do not use pedal wrenches and cone wrenches for other fasteners. Thin tools are fragile tools, and you want to preserve them for the jobs where they are needed.

Finally we have the fork, which Unjon is talking about. Again there is a threaded bearing-race, and a lock-nut. The lock-nut can usually be worked with a big adjustable wrench, or fixed wrench of any thickness, but not always. The bearing-race is often knurled and does not take a wrench, but I saw one bike that needed a thin wrench. Common wrench sizes here are 30, 32 and 36 mm.
You shouldn't actually need to use any kind of tool on the bearing-race, since there is a washer with an anti-rotation tab between it and the lock-nut. But the tab often slips out of its groove -- on the poor-quality bikes we mostly see In The Dust. Then you may have to use big pliers on the bearing-race, and on the washer too.

Now.... A spoke wrench, which Kowtow mentioned, is a very different kind of tool. It is also know as a spoke key, which illustrates its size. Thus it is a perfect match when placed in Kowtow's... pocket.

[Elliot]

I would like to thank Elliot for fixing my bike and my neighbor's bike. It was VERY much appreciated, since I made the mistake of bringing my husband's tool kit instead of mine, thereby leaving myself with NO way to remove my back wheel. I would like to thank Martini Steve for being a very nice greeter, and unjonharley for being a wonderful host. Thank you all. It was a pleasure.

Wow. I don't know who you are, but you just made it all worthwhile! (And welcome to ePlaya!)

[Elliot]

On the wall in Millicent (the bus) hangs a faded postcard from 2007. It was delivered by messenger on the last day of The Event. It is a thank-you note from a man who had a rather unusual bicycle-problem. We fixed it with a highly specialized tool I had not used in 30 years -- highly specialized for automobile-transmissions.

[unjonharley]

On the wall in Millicent (the bus) hangs a faded postcard from 2007. It was delivered by messenger on the last day of The Event. It is a thank-you note from a man who had a rather unusual bicycle-problem. We fixed it with a highly specialized tool I had not used in 30 years -- highly specialized for automobile-transmissions.

Thanks for the brain jog.. I had to change 50 ballcocks in a building.. So I made a wrench to fit the bottom nut.. It lays in the top of my tool box to this day.. It will be added to the bike tools for a new life..

[Elliot]

On the wall in Millicent (the bus) hangs a faded postcard from 2007. It was delivered by messenger on the last day of The Event. It is a thank-you note from a man who had a rather unusual bicycle-problem. We fixed it with a highly specialized tool I had not used in 30 years -- highly specialized for automobile-transmissions.

Thanks for the brain jog.. I had to change 50 ballcocks in a building.. So I made a wrench to fit the bottom nut.. It lays in the top of my tool box to this day.. It will be added to the bike tools for a new life..

For the record....
A ballcock valve is a piece of plumbing equipment found in most homes, but rarely on a bicycle.

[unjonharley]

On the wall in Millicent (the bus) hangs a faded postcard from 2007. It was delivered by messenger on the last day of The Event. It is a thank-you note from a man who had a rather unusual bicycle-problem. We fixed it with a highly specialized tool I had not used in 30 years -- highly specialized for automobile-transmissions.

Thanks for the brain jog.. I had to change 50 ballcocks in a building.. So I made a wrench to fit the bottom nut.. It lays in the top of my tool box to this day.. It will be added to the bike tools for a new life..

For the record....
A ballcock valve is a piece of plumbing equipment found in most homes, but rarely on a bicycle.

Precisely, The wrench was for work close to the wall and the bottom nut in the picture.

[Elliot]

.
This morning an inquiry arrived by e-mail about choosing a new Playa bike. Apparently this is the time of year when bicycles tend to go on seasonal close-out sale, so perhaps this information is useful to others also. We are talking about a quality bike to keep and use for many years. The main question was whether a steel frame or an aluminum frame would resist corrosion better. That I don't know, but here is what I replied otherwise:

I like aluminum for the light weight. Playa bikes often need to be lifted on and off motor-vehicles, and a few pounds can make a considerable difference. Light weight is also always an advantage when riding, although the difference may be slight.
On the other hand, there are a couple spots on some bicycles where aluminum can fail from mechanical abuse sooner than steel would. But this is a low risk, and can always be repaired by an expert, and I might pick aluminum for the light weight.

Whatever you do, don't buy a steel Huffy without comparing the weight to some other bikes. Huffys tend to be extraordinarily heavy.

Wider tires are always better for the Playa -- the wider the better. I tried a Mongoose (Walmart) Beast this year, and it simply floated over loose Dust on its 4" wide tires. But that bike is grotesquely heavy. There are now cruiser tires of around 2.3 or 2.4 width, and these do quite well.

Fairly smooth-tread cruiser tires also roll easier than knobby mountain bike tires, and raise less dust.

In the last couple years, taller tires have also come on the market. These are 29" tall, as opposed to the common 26". Like wider tires, taller tires also roll easier over loose ground. So I'm thinking you want a bike with 29 x 2.3-2.4 tires.

I like your thinking about 3 gears. And hub gears give less trouble than derailer gears. Your friends with single speeds may have seemed to do pretty well, but I bet there are times, such as in a head-wind, when they could make good use of other ratios.

Gear hubs are available with up to 15 gears, but the price goes up in proportion.

Cruisers are also available with 5, 6 and 7 derailer gears, and I would not turn down one of these if the bike is otherwise well suited. I have an Electra brand cruiser here with aluminum frame and 7 derailer gears, and it seems a good bike. It costs around $400. (Not that I am promoting any brand -- I just happen to be working on an Electra right now.)

One trick that can be used on single speed bikes is to replace one of the sprockets so that this one gear ratio is lower -- meaning lower speed and easier pedaling. This is universally popular on my Loaner bikes. But you lose a bit of speed when conditions are good.

There are two kinds of brakes -- the kind you operate with levers on the handlebar; and the kind you operate by pedaling backward, called a coaster brake.
Coaster brakes are pretty much fool proof, except that cheap bikes often have problems caused by unskilled assembly at discount department stores. A coaster brake bike from a proper bicycle store should be trouble-free.

But I don't like coaster brakes because of... well, habit, I suppose. I find it awkward to use -- specially when I start out, because I cannot spin the pedals back to get best leverage for getting started.

That said, hand brakes have cables, and the cables often get damaged, and eventually become corroded or clogged with Dust. So you should plan on replacing the cables often. You will also need to replace the brake pads once in a while, and the calipers can even be damaged. Still, my preference is hand brakes.

As for sitting comfortably upright, I routinely replace handlebars -- both the straight mountain bike bars and the back-swept cruiser bars -- with BMX bars. BMX bikes are the little "stump jumper" bikes that young boys use. They have an extra tall handlebar, and I pick these bikes up for a couple bucks at every chance, just for the handlebar. Many of these bars are of different diameter in the middle, so a bit of fabricating skill is needed to install them on adult bikes. But my Loaner customers love them. If the bike has cables, those will need to be replaced with longer ones.