Eastcoasters on the increase call for creative Westcoasting

Bounce530 · Post by **Bounce530** » Sat May 09, 2009 12:23 am

Seems like every other thread is some virgin floridian trying to find a theme camp, or a New Yawrker tossing in some insult posts. Its time to get down Biggie vs. Tu Pac style bitches! WTF do you have to offer, except cheesesteaks?
Hey how's that 2,200 mile drive, or the 4hr flight?

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Sat May 09, 2009 5:41 am

how do you say "Masstachushits"?
some of those names confuse me............"Algonkwins"? huh?

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Sat May 09, 2009 7:32 am

its ON, motherfuckers.

yeah, bitch, suck my florida.

you NEED us...you've gotten soft and squishy, like french cheese.
We are the hard edge, the serrated razor that leaves little blood marks on your botox cheeks.
we are the cranky crank-heads who bludgeon our way across the vapid, colorless mid-west to make the journey to the man.
We struggle, we put up with lousy weather, and even worse accents to "bring it" to the playa and show you naturally tan freaks what it's like to be truly pasty, and not some goth affectation.

we are the essence of the bull-horn, we are pushy, loud, obnoxious, and we get what we want, when we want it, because we can.

Except for new jersey, which none of the other east coast states like very much, we are united in our Deep mockery of everything Chai, and will teach you to drink the Egg Cream.

YO BROOKLYN!

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Sat May 09, 2009 7:50 am

yes, but, you're downwind of us.........

[youtube][/youtube]

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Sat May 09, 2009 8:32 am

you're right, we can smell schwarzenegger all the way down rte. 80. like manure, on a hot day in the country.

i'll take little stevie wonder over the terminator EVERY time.

http://www.nbc.com/Saturday_Night_Live/ ... on/881501/

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Sat May 09, 2009 8:44 am

when you say:" take a little Stevie Wonder".....................

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Sat May 09, 2009 8:56 am

the scatotological reference to one of our nations finest musicians floating in a toilet bowl is uncalled for.

very funny, but totally un-pc

which is why i'm trying to figure out the logistics of a synthetic electronic turd that when activated by the opening of the JOTS door will break out into "i just called to say, i love you" while writhing back and forth in a semi-spastic motion.

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Sat May 09, 2009 9:08 am

I bet there's a Hallmark card.....................with "realistic dance motion"...........

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Sat May 09, 2009 6:56 pm

ok, thats just wrong...

thats coming from an east-coaster, so you know it must be terribly, terribly wrong...

Maybe in new jersey they can laugh at that and not feel dirty, but hey, in new jersey, anything goes.

in newark, that would be perfectly acceptable.

but you westies know what it's like to have second class citizens in your midst. You know the ones, the people you look at and dont even see. the people who do all the nasty jobs, like being host to landfills and such. The New jerseyites are our Mexicans, and so we delegate them to their little barrios and car washes, and try not to go to passaic at night.

"honey, i need the yard done, can you go down to the corner and pick up a couple of New jersey Boys for the day?"

"allright, just dont let them into the house, you know how they smell funny"

"oh dear god, you are SO statist".

"i am NOT....i have a good friend who lives in Ho-Ho-kus"

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Mon May 11, 2009 6:35 am

"wrong" is such an extreme statement.....

you know, within yourself, that, if you walk by a pile on the sidewalk, even on a lawn, you always look........and, if you see corn, you stare, and, feign revulsion.........(but that would be acknowledging study of said pile).......

But,

it's sublime revulsion, "I don't want to look but can't turn my head".........revulsion.........

you know the feeling...........embrace it......

Toolmaker · Post by **Toolmaker** » Mon May 11, 2009 1:50 pm

ygmir wrote:"wrong" is such an extreme statement.....

you know, within yourself, that, if you walk by a pile on the sidewalk, even on a lawn, you always look........and, if you see corn, you stare, and, feign revulsion.........(but that would be acknowledging study of said pile).......

But,

it's sublime revulsion, "I don't want to look but can't turn my head".........revulsion.........

you know the feeling...........embrace it......

How come no matter how much you chew corn and peanuts they come out whole?

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Tue May 12, 2009 6:21 am

Toolmaker wrote:
ygmir wrote:"wrong" is such an extreme statement.....

you know, within yourself, that, if you walk by a pile on the sidewalk, even on a lawn, you always look........and, if you see corn, you stare, and, feign revulsion.........(but that would be acknowledging study of said pile).......

But,

it's sublime revulsion, "I don't want to look but can't turn my head".........revulsion.........

you know the feeling...........embrace it......
How come no matter how much you chew corn and peanuts they come out whole?

because eating asparagus makes your pee stink..........

LostinReno · Post by **LostinReno** » Tue May 12, 2009 3:07 pm

ygmir wrote:
Toolmaker wrote:
ygmir wrote:"wrong" is such an extreme statement.....

you know, within yourself, that, if you walk by a pile on the sidewalk, even on a lawn, you always look........and, if you see corn, you stare, and, feign revulsion.........(but that would be acknowledging study of said pile).......

But,

it's sublime revulsion, "I don't want to look but can't turn my head".........revulsion.........

you know the feeling...........embrace it......
How come no matter how much you chew corn and peanuts they come out whole?
because eating asparagus makes your pee stink..........

LOL, Why not, lets be totally disgusting here! It's the same with barfing up Doritos, you know they weren't triangular when you chewed them up?? How does that happen??

Post by **Elderberry** » Tue May 12, 2009 3:57 pm

I had a friend that really loved eating strawberries when she was pregnant. She said they tasted as good coming up as they did going down.

JK