Rest In Peace

[Simon of the Playa]

http://www.nytimes.com/2014/02/28/world ... t-110.html

[^Rhino!]

RIP Comedian Tim Wilson.

Tim on Southern accents:

[media]

[JayBobBoy]

Don't you hate it when you come across news that an old, dear friend has passed. We were close friends throught my formative teen years and continued to run into each other throughout our lives. I feel like such an ass that I live nearby, but never got word of his passing until three months had gone by.

Although we had drifted apart...I'm feeling his loss on a really deep level. I love you Larry Smith. Rest in Peace!

[ygmir]

damn sorry JBB.............that is a tough one!

[Simon of the Playa]

.

[ranger magnum]

Eddie Knuckles, the king of house music.

[Thecatman]

Mickey Rooney

[media]

[msj2u]

So sad to hear, RIP Mickey!!

MSJ

[Patsh]

he did make it into his 90s!

[maryanimal]

Rest in peace Mickey.


Now his greedy family can fight amongst themselves.

[theCryptofishist]

The end of an era...

[FIGJAM]

Lee Roy Murray (80) fell asleep in his chair watching TV and passed peacefully.

My half brother.

"Here's to our noble selves, there are damn few of us left!"

[ygmir]

Lee Roy Murray (80) fell asleep in his chair watching TV and passed peacefully.

My half brother.

"Here's to our noble selves, there are damn few of us left!"

damn sorry FJ

[sadie]

(((Figjam)))
So sorry. I'm glad he went peacefully.

[tatonka]

sry for your loss Figjam

[Thecatman]

((((FJ))))

At least he was doing something enjoyable and as Sadie said, peacefully.

[FIGJAM]

Ya'll don't be sorry. (unless you conspired to kill him)

My family and siblings seem to be setting up a pattern of being fine right up to the point where we just stop. (Moms side of the family all in their 90s)

Can't think of a better way to go.

He was a great guy and I liked him a lot, but he's moved on and I for one will not be selfish enough to wish he hadn't!

It's like I said in the "What will they say at my funeral." thread.

"He's not here, let's go do something else!"

I am content.

[Mojojita]

Bless your heart Figgy, you are a good man.

[FIGJAM]

I thought hard about posting about it at all.

But I couldn't let the opportunity of a real time example of how to "cope" slip away.

When my father died I hadn't learned acceptance and struggled through the 5 stages of grief.

It was painful and exhausting and unproductive.

The 5th stage is acceptance.

Started practicing 30 years ago, not just with death, but everything.

1st stage is denial.

I don't waste time arguing with the world that it should be different.

2nd stage is anger.

Anger always stems from expectations not being met.

Can't have anger without it being preceded by an expectation, and anger is a mild form of insanity.

Just look at the horrible choices that are made by angry people.

Another form of arguing with the world to be different.

3rd stage is bargaining.

There is no deal to make!!!

Everything is exactly the way it "Should" be due to every event in the universe leading up to this moment.

4th stage is depression.

Remember all that anger up there in stage 2?

Well, anger is energy, and if you internalize it and don't get it out of your system it will turn into depression.

90% of all depression stems from this!!!

The other 10% is from a chemical imbalance in the brain and is rather rare.

The 5th stage is acceptance.

Since I started with that in the first place, I didn't have to go through all that physical and emotional turmoil because it never got a chance to begin!

Acceptance in all things means I don't think about why something happened or how horrible it is, but instead start thinking about what I can do about it.

Sometimes there is nothing I can do about it, so I don't.

Nothing, nix, nil, including continuing to think about it.

I have nothing but fond memories of my brother Lee.

He wouldn't want me to feel bad, so I won't.

If he did, he would have been an asshole (which he wasn't) and I wouldn't feel bad anyway, just to spite him.

I hope this long post as an example can help anyone in a similar situation.

Thank you all for your kind words, but say them to someone who needs them more than I.

[Ratty]

(((Figgy)))
Thank you for the post. I've practiced those steps a few times and you're right. It gets easier to accept each time. Thank you for taking the time to share.

[maryanimal]

(((Figjam))) He passed in the best possible way! Onward and upward! A new journey awaits!

[tatonka]

best is yet to come ")

[Kinetik V]

I rarely login to the eplaya anymore. Tonight out of the blue I thought I'd see if my login still worked and it obviously does.
The first thread I read was something about snark and how the eplaya has changed...interesting first choice there.

The second thread that caught my eye was this one. Talk about timing...

6 months ago as of Thursday is when my mother passed away. And those 5 stages of grief...4 of them I know very well. It's barely been a week if that when I finally made it to Stage 5. And while it's early yet...getting to acceptance has changed things for me and those around me in some very positive ways.

They gave her 2 years. Her strength and that of her family gave her 13. 3 major rounds of chemo took her to death's door every time yet she fought back. But this last time instead of Round #4 of chemo she found Stage 5: Acceptance. It was her time to let go and she did... and now I get to let go too. After 13 long years...she may have had the diagnosis, but the hell it gave her was also shared. That hell is not going to be used to apologize for mistakes made in the past. But hopefully it might help some others find some acceptance of their own as to why people do some of the crazy shit that they do or did. There are no handbooks or guidelines to speak of, you do the best you can to cope (even if it takes you to some very dark places filled with pain and regret) and hopefully when it's over with...you are still alive yourself.

Until you've been there, you'll never know. And I'm just thankful to have made it through.
--------------
FigJam...what a post...saying thanks for sharing seems kinda pathetic considering the impact it had. But it's the only words I have left. Thank You.

[Simon of the Playa]

100 years of solitude

[theCryptofishist]

100 years of solicitude?

[Joeln]

They just called all of us into the break room and told us that a temp worker who had been here about 6 months phoned the temp agency sometime in the last few days to resign, just now the news is that he committed suicide.

I didn't connect with him super-well, but frankly better than many. Ex-military, he had an incredibly foul mouth (kind of fun) a penchant for very coarse jokes. He was a biker. He worked here in a role that had been neglected for many years, facilitating us in production with quality issues. Because of long neglect and massive dysfunction at this company, he had his hands full. His disgust and disbelief at the crap we've been dealing with was refreshing.

Most of us are caught by complete surprise and pretty stunned.
Fly well, Charles Wimer!

[^Rhino!]

Joeln, he's gone to that final ride in the sky.

That's how all the hardcore bikers I know (outlaws and others) feel when one of their own passes. They'll remember the good times, rejoice in the family they have, and keep moving on.

[media]

One last ride.

[theCryptofishist]

[media]

[sadie]

Joeln, my thoughts are with you. When someone takes their own life, so many questions remain unanswered. He had his reasons, and obviously thought this was the best way to escape his pain. Suicide touches everyone who knew the person, including casual acqaintences at work. It's good that you made an attempt to get to know him in the short time you worked together. For your own sanity, don't spend a lot of time wondering if there was anything you could have done or said to help him - just remember the good conversations you had and let it go, otherwise you could drive yourself crazy. In my experience, once that decision has been made there is very little anyone can do to prevent it from happening.

[ygmir]

so sorry , Joeln. you no doubt brought him some happiness and such......good on ya!