Ask Eric

Post by **Eric** » Sun Dec 08, 2013 11:25 pm

Keep the beard, drink more (always drink more), and carry a bag with lumps of coal in it. Throw a lump of coal at the "comedian", while shouting "here's your present, asswipe".

TT120 · Post by **TT120** » Fri Apr 25, 2014 7:02 pm

Dear Eric;

What is the best wiskey for picklebacks?

Post by **Eric** » Fri Apr 25, 2014 9:17 pm

If I ever find you wasting good whiskey for a pickleback, I will take the bottle from you & leave. Use some rotgut, since the brine wipes out the taste.

*muttermutterheathensruininggoodwhiskeymuttermutter*

*Kat* · Post by ***Kat*** » Mon Apr 28, 2014 6:38 am

Dear Eric.
I accidentally opened a Hefeweizen when I was going for a black beer. Now the Hefeweizen is in the wrong type of glass and the yeast is still stuck in the bottom of the bottle. What is the right way to proceed so Germany does not annul my citizenship?

Post by **Eric** » Mon Apr 28, 2014 5:34 pm

Stop drinking beer and switch to schnapps until you have learned the correct procedures. Being Germany, there may be a test involved to retain citizenship.

ProfessorChaos · Post by **ProfessorChaos** » Mon Apr 28, 2014 6:15 pm

Dear Eric,

How long did it take you to grow your ginger beard? It is EPIC! I too have a ginger beard and want it to be long like yours.

Thanks,

ProfessorChaos

Post by **Eric** » Mon Apr 28, 2014 10:31 pm

It's been growing since I stopped shaving it.

ProfessorChaos · Post by **ProfessorChaos** » Tue Apr 29, 2014 7:44 am

Well...that answers that.

Does it get fried on the playa? Got any cleaning/care tips for bearded life in the dust?

Post by **Eric** » Tue Apr 29, 2014 1:44 pm

Yes.

I love easy questions.

goathead · Post by **goathead** » Sun May 04, 2014 6:39 pm

but if a banjo play in the hills should I wander up and make myself at home?

Post by **Eric** » Sun May 04, 2014 10:05 pm

Definitely. Never ignore a banjo.

graidawg · Post by **graidawg** » Thu May 15, 2014 1:51 pm

Dear Eric, is it permissible to ask 2 question?

first do you do Anything moderately?
second do you have any suggestions on how to make my beard more magnificent and look less like i jut haven't washed my face?
ok thats 3 questions, but thats ok right?
ah thats 4, does this make you think of the spanish inquisition?

i'm going to stop now

misfit · Post by **misfit** » Fri May 16, 2014 9:16 am

which is best, sucking or licking.....?...

GreyCoyote · Post by **GreyCoyote** » Fri May 16, 2014 2:53 pm

misfit wrote:which is best, sucking or licking.....?...

"I'll take BOTH for $200, Alex..."

*Kat* · Post by ***Kat*** » Fri May 16, 2014 3:03 pm

misfit wrote:which is best, sucking or licking.....?...

It depends on the make of your ice cream: milk-based ice cream should preferably be licked, water-based ice cream (otter pops) should preferably be sucked.
Of course you forgot the third option: spooning.

'Twas ice cream you were talking about, right?

Sunbeam56 · Post by **Sunbeam56** » Fri May 16, 2014 3:27 pm

Excellent riposte, Kat.

Post by **Eric** » Fri May 16, 2014 6:36 pm

graidawg wrote:Dear Eric, is it permissible to ask 2 question?

Does the title say "Ask Eric one question, and one question only"?

first do you do Anything moderately?
second do you have any suggestions on how to make my beard more magnificent and look less like i jut haven't washed my face?
ok thats 3 questions, but thats ok right?
ah thats 4, does this make you think of the spanish inquisition?

i'm going to stop now

No.
Wash your face.
Yes.
I love thinking about my ancestors on the Auto-da-fé, thanks.

misfit wrote:which is best, sucking or licking.....?...

Depends on who's doing it, and their skill level.

GreyCoyote wrote:
misfit wrote:which is best, sucking or licking.....?...
I'll take BOTH for $200, Alex..."

I don't believe anyone asked you.

*Kat* wrote:
misfit wrote:which is best, sucking or licking.....?...
It depends on the make of your ice cream: milk-based ice cream should preferably be licked, water-based ice cream (otter pops) should preferably be sucked.
Of course you forgot the third option: spooning.

'Twas ice cream you were talking about, right?

I don't believe the thread is called "Ask Kat" either.

Sunbeam56 wrote:Excellent riposte, Kat.

No, not really. If she had talked about the appropriate way to suck a dick, maybe. Even a finger. The "say it's about food" option is just too common for my tastes.

Next question.

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Fri May 16, 2014 6:45 pm

Goathead Wrote:

keep from going SOP on them.

dear Eric, Am i now a Adverb, a Verb or a Noun?

Post by **Eric** » Fri May 16, 2014 6:48 pm

Simon of the Playa wrote:Goathead Wrote:
keep from going SOP on them.

dear Eric, Am i now a Adverb, a Verb or a Noun?

Yes. Mainly a verb and a noun, but you can be used in many grammatical ways, some of them even correct.

Roberto Dobbisano · Post by **Roberto Dobbisano** » Fri May 16, 2014 8:09 pm

i would say he's more of a dangling modifier.

Post by **mdmf007** » Fri May 16, 2014 11:31 pm

Dear Eric,

Will last years always be better than this years burn?

Captain Goddammit · Post by **Captain Goddammit** » Sat May 17, 2014 1:01 am

Dear Eric

What ever happened to the Playa Chicken?

kittyrodriguez · Post by **kittyrodriguez** » Sat May 17, 2014 3:44 am

Dear Eric,

How many hours a week are you active on eplaya?

Is there a secret moderator headquarters where you all gather and strategize?

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Sat May 17, 2014 9:33 am

kittyrodriguez wrote:Is there a secret moderator headquarters where you all gather and strategize?

This one I have the answer to. I won't tell you, because it's not called Ask theCryptofishist. However, there is an answer, I have it, neener, neener, neener.

Patsh · Post by **Patsh** » Sat May 17, 2014 5:24 pm

theCryptofishist wrote:
kittyrodriguez wrote:Is there a secret moderator headquarters where you all gather and strategize?
This one I have the answer to. I won't tell you, because it's not called Ask theCryptofishist. However, there is an answer, I have it, neener, neener, neener.

Ha! and I have a picture of the Playa Chicken! (or some wannabe imitation of it...)
but, this isn't 'ask Patsh', either...

Post by **Eric** » Sat May 17, 2014 8:13 pm

Roberto Dobbisano wrote:i would say he's more of a dangling modifier.

I would say this thread isn't called "Ask a Sock" either. Sheesh.

mdmf007 wrote:Will last years always be better than this years burn?

If last years is ever better, it's time to stop going. Next years burn is always better.

Captain Goddammit wrote:What ever happened to the Playa Chicken?

He retired in shame after being replaced by lame bacon jokes.

kittyrodriguez wrote:How many hours a week are you active on eplaya?

Is there a secret moderator headquarters where you all gather and strategize?

1) I don't know, I don't want to.
2) Yes. And drink a lot. We're very heavy drinkers.

theCryptofishist wrote:This one I have the answer to. I won't tell you, because it's not called Ask theCryptofishist. However, there is an answer, I have it, neener, neener, neener.

Thank you for playing responsibly.

Patsh wrote:but, this isn't 'ask Patsh', either...

Thank you also for playing responsibly.

Who let all these responsible people in my thread?

Patsh · Post by **Patsh** » Sat May 17, 2014 8:20 pm

Sorry to be the bearer of awkward news, Eric, but you know... they'll let just about anyone into this thread.

Post by **Eric** » Sat May 17, 2014 8:56 pm

Patsh wrote:Sorry to be the bearer of awkward news, Eric, but you know... they'll let just about anyone into this thread.

Trust me, I know. I've seen the quality of the questions being asked.

tamarakay · Post by **tamarakay** » Sat May 17, 2014 9:32 pm

So, a serious one for you dear. Though dye with dignity is not doing any large scale fundraisers, I am considering auctioning a couple of hand knit pieces through eBay. All proceeds to be used for silk/dyes for use on playa. Is it permissible to link to said auction from my dwd camp thread?

Post by **Eric** » Sat May 17, 2014 11:49 pm

tamarakay wrote:So, a serious one for you dear. Though dye with dignity is not doing any large scale fundraisers, I am considering auctioning a couple of hand knit pieces through eBay. All proceeds to be used for silk/dyes for use on playa. Is it permissible to link to said auction from my dwd camp thread?

Oi. Some things I just have to do behind the curtains.

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