Conflict resolution 101: Alcohol bribery.

Rob the Wop · Post by **Rob the Wop** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 11:32 am

In an effort to make the Eplaya a more 'touchy feely' lovefest, I have created a thread that quickly runs through the normal Eplaya conflict resolution process in record time.

First, argue. Defend your position. Please keep it brief and general.

Second, attack. Insult.

Third, apologize. Keep it brief but sincere.

Four, ask for booze.

Using this simple, four step program- we can get through all this in record time and start our real purpose for being here- namely drinking ourselves into a stupor.

buckethead alien · Post by **buckethead alien** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 11:33 am

Oh Yah!

Rob the Wop · Post by **Rob the Wop** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 11:35 am

You are wrong. I know you're wrong. Simply repeating it doesn't make it right.

You are an utter fuckwit. May a thousand rabid gerbils become romatically inclined towards your daughter's anus. You couldn't count your testicles and come up with the same number twice.

I'm sorry, I lost it. You were right all along in ways. Let's agree to disagree.

Where's my Glenlivet?

Thank you for your participation.

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 11:39 am

First, argue. Defend your position. Please keep it brief and general.

i completely disagree about this plan, Rob. what about those of us who like the arguing better than the boozing? i can't believe you are trying to tell me how i experience things.

Second, attack. Insult.

Frankly, i think it's a little bit assholic of you to act like this. i mean, it's fucktards like you who destroy my precious experience.

Third, apologize. Keep it brief but sincere.

jeebus, i'm sorry. it must be the sleep dep. you didn't deserve that.

Four, ask for booze.

whaddaya say we shake it off over a bottle of your magic concoction?

GuinivereElise · Post by **GuinivereElise** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 11:56 am

an excellent showing, Rain. Pip pip...

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 11:58 am

First, argue. Defend your position. Please keep it brief and general.

This is just wrong... the best defense is a good offense, which means being offence. Shit... I knew that one in the second grade!

Second, attack. Insult.

What the fuck are you talking about? Attacking, you semi-hybred-mediteranian-yak, is the last fucking thing anything but a brain-damaged Sicilian would think of. Attack breeds attack... or didn't you think of that... or didn't have the capacity to think.

Third, apologize. Keep it brief but sincere.

I'm sorry about that last line. I've been stressed out and I took it out on you. I shouldn't do that.

Four, ask for booze.

Could I get some of your green bottle stuff?

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 12:01 pm

First, argue. Defend your position. Please keep it brief and general.

This is just wrong... the best defense is a good offense, which means being offence. Shit... I knew that one in the second grade!

Second, attack. Insult.

What the fuck are you talking about? Attacking, you semi-hybred-mediteranian-yak, is the last fucking thing anything but a brain-damaged Sicilian would think of. Attack breeds attack... or didn't you think of that... or didn't have the capacity to think.

Third, apologize. Keep it brief but sincere.

I'm sorry about that last line. I've been stressed out and I took it out on you. I shouldn't do that.

Four, ask for booze.

Could I get some of your green bottle stuff?

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 12:02 pm

I could post that again, if you want...

Simply Joel · Post by **Simply Joel** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 12:16 pm

let me cut right through the crap...

can i have a drink?

calicowboy925 · Post by **calicowboy925** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 1:01 pm

It is posts such as these as to why I do genuinely love you all!

Rob the Wop · Post by **Rob the Wop** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 2:02 pm

Look Rian, Sam- I know you don't feel that this thread is really meaningful. But conflict resolution is a natural part of human interaction. Verbal attacks are also sometimes warranted.

I mean really, you hagis-eating cretins! If you think heathly debate should always be handled in some kind of hippy, feel-good bullshit way- you're off your bleeding nut, old bean! Go hug a fucking tree somewhere with the rest of the fucking unwashed hippies!!

Oh gosh. I think that double pastrami quesadilla last night really put me in a bad mood today. I'm sorry and I didn't mean to lash out at my friends.

Sure, I'll bring some shots of the green liquid.

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 2:09 pm

I'M ON THE FUCKING FLOOR!!!!!!

GuinivereElise · Post by **GuinivereElise** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 2:14 pm

samtzu wrote:
I'M ON THE FUCKING FLOOR!!!!!!

Me too, me too!! You guys crack me up and kick my ass (in the best way).

Oh, hey, Sam... while we're down here....

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 2:24 pm

GuinivereElise wrote:
samtzu wrote:
I'M ON THE FUCKING FLOOR!!!!!!
Me too, me too!! You guys crack me up and kick my ass (in the best way).

Oh, hey, Sam... while we're down here....

Ohhh... Hello... ummmmm.... you smell nice.... and you look... ummmmm... very nice..... You come here often?

tonytohono · Post by **tonytohono** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 2:33 pm

This sounds like something that fits my general demographic...

get upset, overreact, feel like an idiot, feel like an asshole, debate apologizing, acquiesce, take a deep breath, promise myself it will never happen again, know that that is highly unlikely, prove my suspicions are correct within 24 hours...

rewind and repeat constantly. And sure I'll have a drink too.

TY RTW~!

GuinivereElise · Post by **GuinivereElise** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 2:34 pm

samtzu wrote:
GuinivereElise wrote:
samtzu wrote:
I'M ON THE FUCKING FLOOR!!!!!!
Me too, me too!! You guys crack me up and kick my ass (in the best way).

Oh, hey, Sam... while we're down here....
Ohhh... Hello... ummmmm.... you smell nice.... and you look... ummmmm... very nice..... You come here often?

No, Sam, I don't. And I resent the implication.

While we're at it, I'd like to add that I am forever creeped out by you and your sock, you dirty old bastard.

Oh, Sam, I'm sorry. Wow. I think it's just because I'm still not feeling 100%... I didn't mean it, I promise.

Hey, *wink wink* if you meet me in the bar, I'll give you a body shot... no hard feelings, right? (well, except THOSE hard ones...)

(how'd I do, Rob?)

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 2:35 pm

Rob the Wop wrote:Look Rian, Sam- I know you don't feel that this thread is really meaningful. But conflict resolution is a natural part of human interaction. Verbal attacks are also sometimes warranted.

Rob, you cutie, I don't think you quite understand where i'm coming from. i believe in fullscale e-violence. i think that lovey dovey hippy crap is a bad idea altogether. and here you are trying to promote it. as evidence, let me cite your first post on this thread.

I mean really, you hagis-eating cretins! If you think heathly debate should always be handled in some kind of hippy, feel-good bullshit way- you're off your bleeding nut, old bean! Go hug a fucking tree somewhere with the rest of the fucking unwashed hippies!!

seriously. how much has all that budweiser rotted your brain, you fingerwaving yahoo? i know you're trying to be comic and everything but with as few brain cells as you have it falls completely flat! why don't you go start your own board if you want to be like that, somewhere for the trolls, the socks, yourself, and the other lowlifes to hang out.

Oh gosh. I think that double pastrami quesadilla last night really put me in a bad mood today. I'm sorry and I didn't mean to lash out at my friends.

Jeebus, I'm so embarrassed that i'm going to use a smiley.

can you ever forgive me? i didn't mean it, it's just that my coworker just finished beating me with a cold trout, and it's left me smelling fishy (no offense, crypto) and feeling like ass. i'm not responding responsibly because of it.

Sure, I'll bring some shots of the green liquid.

how 'bout if i pour it into your mouth - from mine?

DVD Burner · Post by **DVD Burner** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 2:37 pm

I thought that was the prerequisites of posting on this board.

Shit, who knew.

Leave it to Rob.

cowboyangel · Post by **cowboyangel** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 2:39 pm

Rob the Wop wrote:In an effort to make the Eplaya a more 'touchy feely' lovefest, I have created a thread that quickly runs through the normal Eplaya conflict resolution process in record time.

First, argue. Defend your position. Please keep it brief and general.

Second, attack. Insult.

Third, apologize. Keep it brief but sincere.

Four, ask for booze.

Using this simple, four step program- we can get through all this in record time and start our real purpose for being here- namely drinking ourselves into a stupor.

Rob, if you were running on the libertarian ticket I would have voted for you!

cowboyangel · Post by **cowboyangel** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 2:40 pm

Rian Jackson wrote:
Rob the Wop wrote:Look Rian, Sam- I know you don't feel that this thread is really meaningful. But conflict resolution is a natural part of human interaction. Verbal attacks are also sometimes warranted.
Rob, you cutie, I don't think you quite understand where i'm coming from. i believe in fullscale e-violence. i think that lovey dovey hippy crap is a bad idea altogether. and here you are trying to promote it. as evidence, let me cite your first post on this thread.

I mean really, you hagis-eating cretins! If you think heathly debate should always be handled in some kind of hippy, feel-good bullshit way- you're off your bleeding nut, old bean! Go hug a fucking tree somewhere with the rest of the fucking unwashed hippies!!
seriously. how much has all that budweiser rotted your brain, you fingerwaving yahoo? i know you're trying to be comic and everything but with as few brain cells as you have it falls completely flat! why don't you go start your own board if you want to be like that, somewhere for the trolls, the socks, yourself, and the other lowlifes to hang out.
Oh gosh. I think that double pastrami quesadilla last night really put me in a bad mood today. I'm sorry and I didn't mean to lash out at my friends.
Jeebus, I'm so embarrassed that i'm going to use a smiley. :oops: can you ever forgive me? i didn't mean it, it's just that my coworker just finished beating me with a cold trout, and it's left me smelling fishy (no offense, crypto) and feeling like ass. i'm not responding responsibly because of it.

Sure, I'll bring some shots of the green liquid.

how 'bout if i pour it into your mouth - from mine?

shit...saw one of my own up there...but hey, that's gotta be worth something!

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 2:45 pm

GuinivereElise wrote:
samtzu wrote:
GuinivereElise wrote: Me too, me too!! You guys crack me up and kick my ass (in the best way).

Oh, hey, Sam... while we're down here....
Ohhh... Hello... ummmmm.... you smell nice.... and you look... ummmmm... very nice..... You come here often?
No, Sam, I don't. And I resent the implication.

While we're at it, I'd like to add that I am forever creeped out by you and your sock, you dirty old bastard.

Oh, Sam, I'm sorry. Wow. I think it's just because I'm still not feeling 100%... I didn't mean it, I promise.

Hey, *wink wink* if you meet me in the bar, I'll give you a body shot... no hard feelings, right? (well, except THOSE hard ones...)

(how'd I do, Rob?)

It wasn't an implication, it was a rhetorical question... Pay attention.

Why is it that all of you bubble-headed, self absorbed, brain dead bimbo's think that I will lay down for any flea ridden scag that happens to flop in the mud in front of me? Do you think that my taste is as low as yours?

Crap... I'm sorry... it's been one of those days at work, and I just accidently dropped Woodrow to the floor in the rest room, and three guys stepped on him before I could get him reeled back in.

Here... have a MacCallen (42 year old scotch) to soothe yourself.

Rob the Wop · Post by **Rob the Wop** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 3:19 pm

Rian Jackson wrote: how 'bout if i pour it into your mouth - from mine?

There are other ways to drink it? I'm sure none that taste as sweet.
(Yer makin' me blush though. Since I'm Italian, I'm pretty sure my ass turns bright red or something. I'll post pics later.)

GuinivereElise wrote: (how'd I do, Rob?)

Excellent! It helps if you use esoteric, exotic herd animals in your insults- but definitely on the right path.

Work calls. Should I answer?... I guess. Will debate, insult, apologize, and drink later.

regynalonglank · Post by **regynalonglank** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 4:08 pm

I just think you guys are the best, funniest, most intelligent, open minded, realistic, sexy, fun to be around, wildest, most sophisticated people i have ever met.

Fuck you for being so cool, i mean how do you expect anyone to keep up with that shit? i barely have two brain cells left to rub together for warmth, and here you go flaunting your schmarmy frontal lobes all over the internet - you have some kind of nerve. i am appalled!

wow, i don't know what came over me, i think i must have forgotten to eat lunch today or something, please forgive my cretinous behaviour.

may i offer you an adult beverage?

cowboyangel · Post by **cowboyangel** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 4:58 pm

Rob the Wop wrote:
Rian Jackson wrote: how 'bout if i pour it into your mouth - from mine?
There are other ways to drink it? I'm sure none that taste as sweet.
(Yer makin' me blush though. Since I'm Italian, I'm pretty sure my ass turns bright red or something. I'll post pics later.)

GuinivereElise wrote: (how'd I do, Rob?)
Excellent! It helps if you use esoteric, exotic herd animals in your insults- but definitely on the right path.

Work calls. Should I answer?... I guess. Will debate, insult, apologize, and drink later.

oh Rob check the posts awhile back........Rian's quote is mine...all mine

CoworkerLurker · Post by **CoworkerLurker** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 5:48 pm

Rian told me this thread was funny. I had no idea! You guys rock!

Ridiculous fuckheads.

Oops- was that inappropriate? Sorry 'bout that.

Nothing for me, thanks.

Badger · Post by **Badger** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 7:14 pm

Rob, if you were running on the libertarian ticket I would have voted for you!

I'll vote for him - for a fucking drink. Hell, I'll even run his cult.

You do know that, um, Rob has a cult?

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 7:23 pm

but I'm always right you stupid fuckhead, well mostly always, beer me

sputnik · Post by **sputnik** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 7:48 pm

cowboyangel wrote:Rob, if you were running on the libertarian ticket I would have voted for you!

The Libertarians have lost any respectability they ever had in this past election.

What the fuck is that all about? The libertarians are nowhere. They didn't draw enough votes to hurt Kerry, and if you voted for them you are fucked up too.

Woah! Where the hell did that come from. Man I'm sorry. Talking about elections lately just messes with my mind.

How about a beer?

cowboyangel · Post by **cowboyangel** » Tue Nov 09, 2004 8:31 pm

ok...but I'm just talkin about Rob more than the libertarians.....I'd take a libertarian over a republican anyday.....and I couldn't imagine Rob being anything else.

Zulegoona · Post by **Zulegoona** » Wed Nov 10, 2004 12:25 am

He's head of the Robitarian cult, ah I mean church, and the political wing is also known as the Robitarian Party,..... and boy do the Robitarians know how to party..

Conflict resolution 101: Alcohol bribery.

Conflict resolution 101: Alcohol bribery.

Re: Conflict resolution 101: Alcohol bribery.

Re: Conflict resolution 101: Alcohol bribery.