Burning thoughts

Bellemcky · Post by **Bellemcky** » Sat Sep 20, 2014 11:43 am

I waited until now to write this up because I was not confident in my properly and completely expressing how I feel and what I think of this past Burn. I was torn about going back Home because of the finances that prevented so many others from attending. From what I've seen in documentaries and veterans' personal accounts of the beginning of this event artists and counterculture types attended in celebration of many things including adventure and exploring the unknown in each other and themselves.

I received a will call ticket from a very kind and genuine man who I will thank for the rest of my life. I may sound dramatic to some but when you think about how many people list Burning Man as an experience to have on their bucket lists it actually makes sense. I'm not sure if anyone ever lied on their death bed with their last thoughts being of regret over never attending BM but I think it is almost that important. I know for a fact that it is life changing.

My bf was devirginized, I met and had conversations with numerous beautiful burners (one of the best things about BM for me), and I didn't even hit one dance party!
Can you believe it?! I can't. Lol.

In the words of a friend of mine: The Playa Provides.

Bellemcky

Lonesomebri · Post by **Lonesomebri** » Sat Sep 20, 2014 1:47 pm

All the best to you, but I have an issue with the term, and the idea, "bucket list". It makes it sound as if the thing on the list can be contained, it's a singular experience, and that it can then be checked off when "done". Then the people who latch onto that term seem to view the world that way, experiences are not to be so much unique and serendipitous, but are quantifiable enough to be placed on a list which can then be checked off. That it is a unified experience for all involved, which nothing is. For instance, there is a woman I love, I am trying desparately to get in her good graces, with dreams of bliss. Serious dreams. She is not on my bucket list, though. Wouldn't that cheapen the feelings? Whoever she has been with before, or will be with, I do not consider them and me sharing the same bucket list. Now that I think about it, that term almost "commodifies" an experience. Using the term "bucket list" to describe my desire for that woman, or my wanting to go to the Burn, cheapens the sentiments, I'd say. I understand that everyone is now just throwing that term around for whatever it is they want to do, but I feel it makes the experience seem less, instead of setting up the experience as special. Anyway, rock on.

maladroit · Post by **maladroit** » Sat Sep 20, 2014 3:31 pm

I think people can decide if it's still a bucket list item after they've gone...it doesn't affect everyone the same way. And you just don't know until you go. Same with everything else people put on bucket lists...those are things they've heard are an amazing new experience, but they cannot connect with it on a deeper level until they've actually done it. Ultimately I think that bucket lists are only followed until you find the one experience that makes you not need a bucket list anymore. Maybe that's scuba diving, maybe that's sky diving, maybe that's Peace Corps, maybe that's 100 pushups, maybe that's chef school, maybe that's Burning Man. If something doesn't speak to you then you move on and it was just a bucket list item for you...but you tried a new experience and I can only approve.

chuckularone · Post by **chuckularone** » Sun Sep 21, 2014 3:46 pm

Well said Lonesomebri! I have many things I want to experience, but I don't have a bucket list. I plan to climb Mount Kilimanjaro for my fiftieth birthday (2016), but it's not a bucket list thing. I have wanted to go to burning man for nearly forever. I wanted the have kids (and did) again, these things are not items to check off. They are experiences to be experienced in and of themselves.

The items I hope to experience before I shuffle off this mortal coil include going to the moon. Yes, it is wholly impractical and terribly unlikely, but that doesn't mean I don't want to do it!

Those people who want to make a checklist of places to visit can go on their superficial journey to death may feel free to do so without affecting me. I plan to LIVE my life.

graidawg · Post by **graidawg** » Sun Sep 21, 2014 5:31 pm

chuckularone wrote:Well said Lonesomebri! I have many things I want to experience, but I don't have a bucket list. I plan to climb Mount Kilimanjaro for my fiftieth birthday (2016), but it's not a bucket list thing. I have wanted to go to burning man for nearly forever. I wanted the have kids (and did) again, these things are not items to check off. They are experiences to be experienced in and of themselves.

The items I hope to experience before I kick the bucket include going to the moon. Yes, it is wholly impractical and terribly unlikely, but that doesn't mean I don't want to do it!

Those people who want to make a checklist of places to visit can go on their superficial journey to death may feel free to do so without affecting me. I plan to LIVE my life.

thats why its a "bucket" list

chuckularone · Post by **chuckularone** » Sun Sep 21, 2014 6:04 pm

You use your colloquialism, I'll use mine

some seeing eye · Post by **some seeing eye** » Sun Sep 21, 2014 7:09 pm

Glad you and yours had a great experience! I think there is a generalized value difference between W & E Coasts. So the more the good values of the W can enter the E the better! (E has it's own good contributions, and they are considerable.) I would also say that the burn can be a complete reset, opening up creative possibilities and pursuits where you are! Each can use that.

Lonesomebri · Post by **Lonesomebri** » Sun Sep 21, 2014 9:19 pm

graidawg wrote:
chuckularone wrote:The items I hope to experience before I kick the bucket include going to the moon. Yes, it is wholly impractical and terribly unlikely, but that doesn't mean I don't want to do it!Those people who want to make a checklist of places to visit can go on their superficial journey to death may feel free to do so without affecting me. I plan to LIVE my life.
thats why its a "bucket" list

That's why they are experiences, vague and unique to each individual, to each time and place, not a set list. The only thing on my bucket list is to not have a bucket list. I have dreams, desires, goals, hopes. None of them turn out the way I planned, not a one. Some "list" that would make. So, in theory, going to Burning Man is on my bucket list, and you have going to Burning Man on your bucket list... So our desires and goals here are the same? Right? Really? We both want the same thing. Or are they different? Same exact thing entered on the list, right? And once I went, or you go, well, that was the experience, definitive, right? The item has been "done", the list can be checked, right? I wonder how many people in Gypsy International Moonshine Ripoff Camp are checking Burning Man off their bucket list, now that they have it successfully under their belt? Wouldn't it be funny if going was on their bucket list, they went, but it is still on their bucket list? For instance, someone has kids for their own reasons, personal reasons, something much more than a list, and if it is to check a list....well.... Same with anything. It may seem like semantics, but would you use "bucket list" in a romantic poem to describe your life encompassing desire for someone? How about describing your attempt at being a decent, kind, generous person, are these things a person would place on a bucket list, or are they goals and desires? Usually when I hear about a bucket list, it seems like a lame way for someone who hasn't lived, to try and make up for that with a checked list. maybe not here, but it's a preety popular term. What would the Buddha say about having a bucket list, for all you hippies in the house?

And now for the ace in the hole, I shall join the exalted and quote scripture for you..... "Immediacy".

Post by **Elderberry** » Sun Sep 21, 2014 9:27 pm

Lonesomebri wrote:
That's why they are experiences, vague and unique to each individual, to each time and place, not a set list. The only thing on my bucket list is to not have a bucket list. I have dreams, desires, goals, hopes. None of them turn out the way I planned, not a one. Some "list" that would make. So, in theory, going to Burning Man is on my bucket list, and you have going to Burning Man on your bucket list... So our desires and goals here are the same? Right? Really? We both want the same thing. Or are they different? Same exact thing entered on the list, right? And once I went, or you go, well, that was the experience, definitive, right? The item has been "done", the list can be checked, right? I wonder how many people in Gypsy International Moonshine Ripoff Camp are checking Burning Man off their bucket list, now that they have it successfully under their belt? Wouldn't it be funny if going was on their bucket list, they went, but it is still on their bucket list? For instance, someone has kids for their own reasons, personal reasons, something much more than a list, and if it is to check a list....well.... Same with anything. It may seem like semantics, but would you use "bucket list" in a romantic poem to describe your life encompassing desire for someone? How about describing your attempt at being a decent, kind, generous person, are these things a person would place on a bucket list, or are they goals and desires? Usually when I hear about a bucket list, it seems like a lame way for someone who hasn't lived, to try and make up for that with a checked list. maybe not here, but it's a preety popular term. What would the Buddha say about having a bucket list, for all you hippies in the house?

And now for the ace in the hole, I shall join the exalted and quote scripture for you..... "Immediacy".

That's an eye roller if I ever read one.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Mon Sep 22, 2014 8:48 pm

Lonesomebri wrote:That's why they are experiences, vague and unique to each individual, to each time and place, not a set list. The only thing on my bucket list is to not have a bucket list. I have dreams, desires, goals, hopes. None of them turn out the way I planned, not a one.

I don't have a lot of respect or affection for John Lennon, but I've long loved what he said (or allegedly said, she weasels in case it's someone else's quote): "Life is what happens when you're making other plans."
I guess there are people who have goals, and methodically go about achieving them. And I kinda admire them for that. I also sorta think they are animals in a zoo... I'm definitely puzzled.

tatonka · Post by **tatonka** » Mon Sep 22, 2014 10:34 pm

burning thoughts .. Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis

Post by **trilobyte** » Tue Sep 23, 2014 9:42 am

I'm giving this a nudge over to the 2014 Stories board, since that's a better fit. Thanks for sharing, I'm glad to hear that everything came together for you.

Lonesomebri · Post by **Lonesomebri** » Tue Sep 23, 2014 11:54 am

Elderberry wrote:
Lonesomebri wrote:And now for the ace in the hole, I shall join the exalted and quote scripture for you..... "Immediacy".
That's an eye roller if I ever read one.

Ignore it, the wound will heal in time.

I don't really think the original poster was even describing his bucket list fulfillment, but more the results of his experience. Anyway. carry on.

gaminwench · Post by **gaminwench** » Tue Sep 23, 2014 1:27 pm

I think OP is a 'her'. Not that it matters.

OP, will you come home again?

Zealous · Post by **Zealous** » Wed Sep 24, 2014 12:58 pm

If I had put together a bucket list a year ago, Burning Man would definitely be on it. It wouldn't be crossed off yet, though - I've attended exactly once and that's hardly the full experience I'm looking for.

Post by **AntiM** » Wed Sep 24, 2014 2:44 pm

My bucket list is backwards, I add things I've done to it. Then I go find new things to add. I know there are places I'd love to go and things I'd love to do which I will never get to, but that is okay. Some days just petting the cats and having a nice cup of coffee in my yard is an accomplishment enough.

forty_eight · Post by **forty_eight** » Wed Sep 24, 2014 5:26 pm

I think it has to start as a bucket list item, or you have an expectation that the event will be a good fit.

In that sense, a lot of us are likely returning bucket listers.

Bucket lists become a gateway drug for becoming "burners" - yet I don't really prefer that term to describe participants (or that one, lol).

Or, we can get all annoying trying to parse it out with semantics ... I want dip my toes in the water to see if I like it, etc etc.

Complaining about bucket listers starts to sound like the hipster refrain about having done it "before it went mainstream".

Jovankat · Post by **Jovankat** » Wed Sep 24, 2014 5:34 pm

AntiM wrote:My bucket list is backwards, I add things I've done to it. Then I go find new things to add.

This seems like a really good approach, to me a bucket list sounds like a list of things you'll keep putting off until it is either too late or you get some bad news and discover you only have a certain about of time left and you need to panic and try to cram all these things in. The idea of your life being a bucket you're filling with cool things all the time seems a much better way to live.

Royal Turkey · Post by **Royal Turkey** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 7:02 am

Just because something starts out as a bucket list item doesn't mean that you can't be present and open to serendipity and immediacy when you have the experience, infact that is the point of the "bucket list" trope; to identify a goal so that you invest the time, money and research to take you from your couch reading about it, to the location and moment you will experience.

By saying "I don't know if I will ever get to do this again, but I want to do it at least once.. and I want to do it right.. " gives you permission. It opens the wallet, the vacation schedule.. it gives you permission to take a half day from work to make sure you get tickets online, spend an entire year in research on these forums with you snarky bastards (

) Flying with three lay overs, rent a truck, build a swamp cooler.. etc. -- Really bucket listers probably make pretty good freshman burners, they do the research, come prepared, probably with too much water, too much food and too much booze and ready to try to get the most out of it.. cause its unique and ephemeral and no guarantee that it will happen again.

As a freshman burner, and admittedly a bucket-lister would I like to come again? Hell yes! but it was expensive. Coming from so far away, my credit card, my work, my family all took a hit for me to get to do this, (hits all validated by it being "a once in a lifetime chance"). I can't afford to do it every year.. but we came and we burned.

Just like the Man itself, we planned it, built it, celebrated, and then burnt it down.

There is no inherent promise in that symbol that it will happen again. Even if I do get to go again, it would be different each time.. I might never get to line up several burns like a flight of wines and compare them.. although envy those of you who can.

- Coming home, inspired by the winds on the Playa and the desire to see everything from above, I just started getting into KAP (Kite Aerial Photography) as a new hobby. Boy, Burning Man would be a great place for that. So I am not sure how soon, but I will be back at some point, probably flying kites next time!

Post by **Elderberry** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 9:38 am

Royal Turkey wrote:Just because something starts out as a bucket list item doesn't mean that you can't be present and open to serendipity and immediacy when you have the experience, infact that is the point of the "bucket list" trope; to identify a goal so that you invest the time, money and research to take you from your couch reading about it, to the location and moment you will experience.

By saying "I don't know if I will ever get to do this again, but I want to do it at least once.. and I want to do it right.. " gives you permission. It opens the wallet, the vacation schedule.. it gives you permission to take a half day from work to make sure you get tickets online, spend an entire year in research on these forums with you snarky bastards ( ) Flying with three lay overs, rent a truck, build a swamp cooler.. etc. -- Really bucket listers probably make pretty good freshman burners, they do the research, come prepared, probably with too much water, too much food and too much booze and ready to try to get the most out of it.. cause its unique and ephemeral and no guarantee that it will happen again.

As a freshman burner, and admittedly a bucket-lister would I like to come again? Hell yes! but it was expensive. Coming from so far away, my credit card, my work, my family all took a hit for me to get to do this, (hits all validated by it being "a once in a lifetime chance"). I can't afford to do it every year.. but we came and we burned.

Just like the Man itself, we planned it, built it, celebrated, and then burnt it down.
There is no inherent promise in that symbol that it will happen again. Even if I do get to go again, it would be different each time.. I might never get to line up several burns like a flight of wines and compare them.. although envy those of you who can.

- Coming home, inspired by the winds on the Playa and the desire to see everything from above, I just started getting into KAP (Kite Aerial Photography) as a new hobby. Boy, Burning Man would be a great place for that. So I am not sure how soon, but I will be back at some point, probably flying kites next time!

Yes

Lonesomebri · Post by **Lonesomebri** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 12:13 pm

I hope Clint Eastwood and Morgan Freeman come out with a movie called "Hopes, dreams and goals", so instead of thinking you are thinking by using the term "Bucket List," popularized by their movie, you could actually refer to your hopes, dreams and goals as what they really are, which isn't a check list. If the only way you can grasp thinking about your own desires is by using the name of a movie....well....

forty_eight · Post by **forty_eight** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 12:45 pm

is it that hollywood is so un-creative that the term is debased and not worthy?

i was never aware of the movie

overall, it's a lot of hand wringing over semantics and leads to passing judgement based on the perception of someone else's intentions.

i don't see how that is productive, personally

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