do you think i'm oversexed?

Chimp · Post by **Chimp** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 4:17 am

Open relationships don't work.

Cheat.

Sounds callous but you may as well admit that unless you are entirely infallible this will probably happen - everyone does it at some point. People who say they dont? They lie.

On the other subject -

Are you oversexed Strych? hmmm, not quite yet...

nymphgonebad · Post by **nymphgonebad** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 4:34 am

JP / Chimp wrote:Open relationships don't work.

Cheat.

Sounds callous but you may as well admit that unless you are entirely infallible this will probably happen - everyone does it at some point. People who say they dont? They lie.

On the other subject -

Are you oversexed Strych? hmmm, not quite yet...

much as i love hearing it from you, you have to admit, it's a little suspect!
that is, hearing it from you!

Chimp · Post by **Chimp** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 4:51 am

very, very suspect.

"Even though you fool your soul your conscience will be mine, all mine!"

'Stand and Deliver' - Adam and The Ants

sugarlarry · Post by **sugarlarry** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 9:23 am

"Cheat.
Sounds callous but you may as well admit that unless you are entirely infallible this will probably happen - everyone does it at some point. People who say they dont? They lie. "

Chimp... don't take this the wrong way, but this is the worst advice ever (said in the voice of the comicbook store guy in the Simpsons).

I don't want to sound like a boyscout here, but if you really value the relationship, it's bound to come back to you at some point, and rip things apart is the most ugly possible way.

Not everyone cheats, and so they don't always lie about it. Statistics indicate that about 50%of married people have affairs, and I think this is probably accurate. This doesn't mean that the other 50% aren't lying, or sexually satisfied, but who can say?

Anyhoo I'd say it's better to work things out before resorting to cheating. I'd even consider breaking up with the person before resorting to cheating... at least then you're indicating how important sex is to you, and you may be averting a later more potent disaster. Who knows... you might actually manage to convince them that this could be the way to go. As is frequently the case they might develop a taste for it themselves, and leave you panting on the floor while they run off to entertain the crew of an aircraft carrier.

nymphgonebad · Post by **nymphgonebad** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 10:01 am

sugarlarry wrote:"Cheat.
Sounds callous but you may as well admit that unless you are entirely infallible this will probably happen - everyone does it at some point. People who say they dont? They lie. "

Chimp... don't take this the wrong way, but this is the worst advice ever (said in the voice of the comicbook store guy in the Simpsons).

I don't want to sound like a boyscout here, but if you really value the relationship, it's bound to come back to you at some point, and rip things apart is the most ugly possible way.

Not everyone cheats, and so they don't always lie about it. Statistics indicate that about 50%of married people have affairs, and I think this is probably accurate. This doesn't mean that the other 50% aren't lying, or sexually satisfied, but who can say?

Anyhoo I'd say it's better to work things out before resorting to cheating. I'd even consider breaking up with the person before resorting to cheating... at least then you're indicating how important sex is to you, and you may be averting a later more potent disaster. Who knows... you might actually manage to convince them that this could be the way to go. As is frequently the case they might develop a taste for it themselves, and leave you panting on the floor while they run off to entertain the crew of an aircraft carrier.

i wish he would! make things more equitable. if we had matching sex drives, i wouldn't even be considering it. everything else is perfect between us - and i get the sense that after our last nightly hot tob debate (hard to get upset when your being cooked) that it's not so much what i do, but rather his desire not to know about it.

Flux · Post by **Flux** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 10:07 am

princess strych-9 wrote:it's not so much what i do, but rather his desire not to know about it.

I've never quite seen the attraction myself, but maybe a combination of some basic agreements -- the usual, safe sex, call if you're not coming home, all that -- with a "Don't ask, don't tell" policy would work for both of you.

Rob the Wop · Post by **Rob the Wop** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 10:07 am

I've cheated twice in 20 years of relationships. Both times after finding out that my partner had cheated. Both times it wasn't worth it in the end, so for the last 10 years- I haven't. That level of trust and honesty is the death of any serious relationship.

I've now been in an open relationship for the past 4 1/2 years and it's been great. We rarely take other lovers (both of us 3-4 times) as we are picky and always discuss it before the deed happens. We reserve the right to veto if we think the 3rd party has issues, like jealousy or respect. We tend to only pick those that we've known and lusted after over a period of time.

So I guess it depends upon the individuals in question. I personally decided a long time ago that honesty and trust were the most important things to me. If they aren't there, I'm outta there. Life is too short for that crap. Some can do open, some think they can- but are really just horny and fuck things up. Communication is the key regardless of any relationship.

jinx_sf_burner · Post by **jinx_sf_burner** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 10:11 am

Oh, Princess! Just my experience... really consider whether you want to marry someone who's sex drive does not match yours.

No matter how much you love them, the incompatibility is eventually going to catch up with you.

IMHO, a long term relationship has to be compatible intellectually, spiritually AND sexually.

princess strych-9 wrote: i wish he would! make things more equitable. if we had matching sex drives, i wouldn't even be considering it. everything else is perfect between us - and i get the sense that after our last nightly hot tob debate (hard to get upset when your being cooked) that it's not so much what i do, but rather his desire not to know about it.

nymphgonebad · Post by **nymphgonebad** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 10:19 am

jinx_sf_burner wrote:Oh, Princess! Just my experience... really consider whether you want to marry someone who's sex drive does not match yours.

No matter how much you love them, the incompatibility is eventually going to catch up with you.

IMHO, a long term relationship has to be compatible intellectually, spiritually AND sexually.

we're actually quite compatible - hide under our bed sometime and see for yourself. i just want to have sex more often. i also have more energy than he does, and am reaching my sexual peak as his is waning. do you honestly think the best advice is to leave someone who's your best friend, makes you laugh, holds your head over the toilet when you vomit and cleans it up when you don't make it to the loo in time? perhaps if you saw us together - every one of our friends thought we were already happily married when they met us. those who knew michael before, say that they have never seen him so happy. he would be crushed if i left him - and i would be gutted.
so he's happier downloading porn off the internet than trying to stick his dick into every passing hot girl. that's his choice. it' also his choice to trust me and love me and to let me have what i want and need. and it's my choice to accept our flaws and imperfections, however daunting they might seem to others.

princess strych-9 wrote: i wish he would! make things more equitable. if we had matching sex drives, i wouldn't even be considering it. everything else is perfect between us - and i get the sense that after our last nightly hot tob debate (hard to get upset when your being cooked) that it's not so much what i do, but rather his desire not to know about it.

jinx_sf_burner · Post by **jinx_sf_burner** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 10:28 am

princess strych-9 wrote: we're actually quite compatible - hide under our bed sometime and see for yourself. i just want to have sex more often. i also have more energy than he does, and am reaching my sexual peak as his is waning. do you honestly think the best advice is to leave someone who's your best friend, makes you laugh, holds your head over the toilet when you vomit and cleans it up when you don't make it to the loo in time? perhaps if you saw us together - every one of our friends thought we were already happily married when they met us. those who knew michael before, say that they have never seen him so happy. he would be crushed if i left him - and i would be gutted.
so he's happier downloading porn off the internet than trying to stick his dick into every passing hot girl. that's his choice. it' also his choice to trust me and love me and to let me have what i want and need. and it's my choice to accept our flaws and imperfections, however daunting they might seem to others.

Don't get me wrong... I hope it is all good for the two of you!! And it sounds like you have a great relationship.

Like I said, just my experience. Those "flaws and imperfections" just happened to be too daunting for me and mine.

Go with it... as long as you are both happy and not hurting each other, more power to you.

And, I'd love to "hide under your bed sometime"! In the interest of research, of course.

nymphgonebad · Post by **nymphgonebad** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 10:29 am

Don't get me wrong... I hope it is all good for the two of you!! And it sounds like you have a great relationship.

Like I said, just my experience. Those "flaws and imperfections" just happened to be too daunting for me and mine.

Go with it... as long as you are both happy and not hurting each other, more power to you.

And, I'd love to "hide under your bed sometime"! In the interest of research, of course. [/quote]

of course.

sugarlarry · Post by **sugarlarry** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 10:30 am

strych-9... you guys ever been with anyone else together? It could subvert his desire not to know about it, in that it could make him/her hot through watching you enjoy yerself. Of course it could totally go the other way.

nymphgonebad · Post by **nymphgonebad** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 10:37 am

sugarlarry wrote:strych-9... you guys ever been with anyone else together? It could subvert his desire not to know about it, in that it could make him/her hot through watching you enjoy yerself. Of course it could totally go the other way.

we've done a little experimenting at parties with friends. i'm sure he has no problem with us having some random female in our bed; someone we know and have to see on a regular basis might get a little sticky ( speaking from past experience ) - nothing we couldn't handle, but an annoyance we'd rather avoid dealing with.

i should also mention that he not a people person like me - side effect of being much smarter than most people and a pessimist to boot. that and the fact that i've spoiled him for anyone else.

sugarlarry · Post by **sugarlarry** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 10:55 am

Well, it sorta sounds like he's okay with it, but just doesn't want the details. It may be important to try messing around a little, but making sure he knows you're his number one.

Strangely I get jealous of my partners friends rather then her sexual partners. This could be cuz I want to know that our emotional/intellectual connection is tighter then our sexual I suppose. Maybe he's the same. So long as he's the most important person in your life, he'd be okay with you jumping others?

nymphgonebad · Post by **nymphgonebad** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 11:04 am

sugarlarry wrote:Well, it sorta sounds like he's okay with it, but just doesn't want the details. It may be important to try messing around a little, but making sure he knows you're his number one.

Strangely I get jealous of my partners friends rather then her sexual partners. This could be cuz I want to know that our emotional/intellectual connection is tighter then our sexual I suppose. Maybe he's the same. So long as he's the most important person in your life, he'd be okay with you jumping others?

so does he. he tolerates my wanting to hang with people he's rather see wiped off the face of earth with a colt.45. because i'm the most important person in his life, too.

PJ · Post by PJ » Thu Sep 18, 2003 11:27 am

princess strych-9 wrote:...he tolerates my wanting to hang with people he's rather see wiped off the face of earth with a colt .45

The malt liquor or the pistol?

nymphgonebad · Post by **nymphgonebad** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 11:31 am

PJ wrote:
princess strych-9 wrote:...he tolerates my wanting to hang with people he's rather see wiped off the face of earth with a colt .45
The malt liquor or the pistol?

i suspect he doesn't care which. wait, i'm lying. he'd want to drink the malt liquor and shoot the motherfuckers.

Arnold Layne · Post by **Arnold Layne** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 11:56 am

Rats rats laid out flat we don't need you we act like that

nymphgonebad · Post by **nymphgonebad** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 12:00 pm

Geoffrey Eel wrote:I'm er FUCKIN LOST, wheres that er, poisonous fuckin monkeys, cheese anyone got, FUCK, damn it fuckin' dark out here, ow! SHIT - Lookie here has anyone seen MYPIPELIKEFUCKINLYIN'ROUND ANYWHERE, ahhhh, sweet jesus, I just stole this fuckin' lapdancin' laptop, SMOKE WHERE help, is this, you were in the desert right, have you SEEN MY FUCKIN FIDDLE ANYWHERE? AGGGGGGHHHHH I'M A Fuckin' Eel, sex, dogs, here it is , good fiddle agggh WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT CRAWLIN' UP MY LEG!!!!

dood, you're an eel - you don't have legs, or do you?

btw, jp is looking for you - he's worried sick, man. have you no decency? no spine?

OregonRed · Post by **OregonRed** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 12:05 pm

btw, jp is looking for you - he's worried sick, man. have you no decency? no spine?

He is an eel, spine is all he's got. And as far as decency, I've only had the pleasure of meeting one decent eel, his name was Charles...

Lothar · Post by **Lothar** » Fri Sep 19, 2003 3:14 pm

Tried an open relationship once... we were deeply in love. It worked great until she decided she liked one of my best friends better than me. Now they cohabitate, he lives off of her, and I fume.

See, I believed that love was infinite... you can split it as many ways as you want and still there is plenty for everyone... but that was foolish. Time cannot be split, and nothing hurt worse than watching that fire behind her eyes fade away, the intensity was directed elsewhere... and my idealism died.

Even a normal relationship is hard as hell to manage-- when more parties are involved it becomes exponentially more emotionally complex. That is not to say that it can't work... I've just never seen it happen. Even my uncle whom is a figurehead for the poly community was left by his wife after 20+ years of poly... if you never stop fishing, sooner or later you're gonna catch one you like better.

So, I wish you well. Fight for what you believe, 9... but know that whatever you invest you also stand to lose.

drowned_saved · Post by **drowned_saved** » Fri Sep 19, 2003 3:31 pm

princess strych-9 wrote:no horses, no dogs. havn't taught the cats how to perform cunillingus.

i know...that's one of the things i love about them: the frisky lil things are able to figure it out all by themselves, without me having to provide fancy instructions. the critters that proceed instinctively are always the best...

PJ · Post by PJ » Fri Sep 19, 2003 4:48 pm

drowned_saved wrote:...havn't taught the cats how to perform cunillingus...the frisky lil things are able to figure it out all by themselves, without me having to provide fancy instructions...

Instructions are time-consuming. If your cat is a dullard, what you need is bait. Note that sardines or cheap canned tuna works just as well as fancy cat food.

TestesInSac · Post by **TestesInSac** » Fri Sep 19, 2003 4:51 pm

PJ wrote:Instructions are time-consuming. If your cat is a dullard, what you need is bait. Note that sardines or cheap canned tuna works just as well as fancy cat food.

Actually, the juice or oil from sardines or tuna is enough, and then you get to have yer bait and eat it, too.

Lydia Love · Post by **Lydia Love** » Fri Sep 19, 2003 4:58 pm

yer bait and eat it, too.

I love reading this shit that completely disgusts me and leaves me utterly amused.

I have no idea what this says about my nature.

PJ · Post by PJ » Fri Sep 19, 2003 5:36 pm

Lydia Love wrote:I have no idea what this says about my nature.

It depends. Do you like sardines?

drowned_saved · Post by **drowned_saved** » Fri Sep 19, 2003 5:37 pm

Lydia Love wrote:
I love reading this shit that completely disgusts me and leaves me utterly amused.

I have no idea what this says about my nature.

one word = prurient

me, too.

Kinetic · Post by **Kinetic** » Fri Sep 19, 2003 11:06 pm

Sardines are disgusting. Yuck

III · Post by **III** » Sun Sep 21, 2003 12:32 pm

>Sardines are disgusting.

no shit.

that's why i prefer dogs. they're easliy guided using palatable substances, like peanut butter.

TestesInSac · Post by **TestesInSac** » Sun Sep 21, 2003 12:41 pm

I'll take the sardines 'cause dogs don't taste good with peanut butter.

do you think i'm oversexed?

Wow.

Been there, tried that...