Are you losing interest in Burning Man too?

[Ano]

When I first attended in 2011, it changed the trajectory of my life. It took me three days after my first burn to find my first full-time job and turn my life around in a lot of ways. I became a wholly more positive person and I gained a lot of confidence in myself. I guess that's the vanilla first-time-burner bullshit "Dear reader" blog-spam cliché experience - but I still can't help but remember the echo that lasted for months after the Burn. Practically everything I did and everywhere I went, I was stuck thinking, "Dust."

It's 2015 now, and I've changed my entire life. I've even moved a few hours from where I was before and, well, I kinda get the fear that I got the message and it's time for me to hang up the phone. When I first moved, I was very fearful about having to skip my first time ever... but lately I've been trying to do a face value trade of my tickets to someone for show tickets. I've been putting off trying to organize things for my camp. Hell, I haven't even thought about where I packed my Burner shit up in my move.

I feel weird about it, but I kind of want to not go to Burning Man and instead spend the $1500 and vacation time on.... actually relaxing? I feel like I'm broken, but that becomes a more and more attractive idea every day.

[DoctorIknow]

I long for the longing—to really be excited about going. I want to want it.

Ahh, the longing. Wanting to feel Burning Man like you did walking down the halls of junior high school wanting sex so bad there was hot wetness of one variety or another in your crotch.

That would be nice to have BM be the arousal focus, but too much real world awareness of what it takes to get out there and what it takes to BE there kinda might throw cold water on that heat.

It is impossible to not value the incredibly good times out there and hope they can be the #1 motivation to do it again.

Yet, there are those pesky bad-bad memories one can't forget, too. Add into the bummers the time and money sucking realities of getting ones ass out there again and, Houston: we may have a problem.

I tell everyone on the fence about going: Buy the ticket, first go 'round. Put it on your refrigerator. Can always sell it.
(my yoga teacher said he would get out of bed sore from yoga every morning,,,,his body begging not to do it....so he'd put out his mat, and leave it there....at some point during the day, as he passed it frequently, the mat would say "Come on! I'm here! You know you want me!" and he'd do his 90minutes.)

A trick I've used more than once is saying to myself "What if this coming BM turns out to be the last one on the Black Rock Desert? You went to the first one so long ago BECAUSE you wanted to be in the desert, and it remains vital to your experience out there. If you miss this one, you know you'd never see the playa again, as why go without Burning Man? Solution: you gotta go!

So many here say "There will always be another year you can go."

BULLSHIT for two reasons:

----YOU might be dead or worse
----The event in the Black Rock Desert could end it's run. Nothing in the world is exempt from change, and for sure, any number of circumstances could end the event in the Black Rock Desert. Maybe many could do their burner thing elsewhere, such as a regional (From the get go, I thought the invention of Regionals was created so that the monster event on the playa could disappear without a trace except in memories/photos/videos and all that stuff stored in the garage or warehouse....)

[Token]

Sheeeeit. All this drama over a week camping in the desert?

That what happens when you assign some life changing galactic revelation to a party just cuz you had a great time.

If it is fun no more, drop the dogma and don't go.

Expectations are killing yall.

[ranger magnum]

Been going since 96. Each year I get more and more excited, and spend more and more time on playa. This year ill be out there nearly 4 weeks.

So no, Im not burned out yet.

[Simon of the Playa]

Ive been going since 96' too, and although i am always excited to go, i'm afraid the man is ambiguous about me being there.






Fuck him, i'm going anyway.

[JohnHealingHands]

Some musings:

Yes, I'm having the same feelings.

Things that are affecting my emotional feelings of home:

I've definitely seen a steady decrease in smaller, interactive art (esp. the participatory performance art, some that stand out: flaming baseball, NASCAR, fight club, dangerous smaller structures to climb, herds of cows, animal control, casino, whipping wall, on and on), which I loved so much. Much less participatory, creative, smaller art, which I miss. There are obvious reasons for this.

Pay and play camps really bother me. I think that's the biggest effect on my emotional reactions to home.

And, NONE of my old-time campmates got tickets this year. NONE. 10+ people, all struck out.

SO, this year I'm hitting the reset button. I'm going to go as a solo virgin again, 11 year old virgin! Meet new people. Regrowing my hymen. I guess this is all part of the plan.

[Zhust]

Oh no worries: I'm not going unless I feel really compelled. Definitely not this year.

And Re: Token, everyone has a different experience. Parties bore me to death—if Burning Man was just some big party (for me) I would have never come back. But (for me) it was a way to try new things ... to test my mettle and my skills; to learn perspectives. Each year something new. There's a few more adventures I'd like to tackle—ones suitable for TTITD—but I think I'm all out of the ones that are easy to prepare for, so now it's all crazy difficult shit.

So I'm kind of meditating on the "why?" Is it for my ego? (said the guy who started a whole "look at me thread"...) Is it for my growth? Don't I know my limits yet? Was it really just a party? Am I deluding myself?

Thanks all for your perspectives, by the way. It's good to hear all the different ways.

[ranger magnum]

Zhust asked if it was really just a party. And that made me recall a conversation capt g'dammit and I had a while ago. I was telling him that I never understood why people call burningman "home". Home to me is my house, my family, my shop, my business, and everything else burningman is not. I wouldn't want to make burningman home. Not that there aren't valuable lessons to be learned on Playa, or that we shouldn't apply some if that to our lives the other 355 days out of the year, but personally I couldn't live like I do on Playa year round.

Because I have no expectations for each year I go, I have yet to be disappointed by what does or does not happen. And since I do not belong to a theme camp, or have a huge camp to set up/maintain/breakdown, I just show up in the RV, drop the stairs, put out a rug in front, string some led lights around and I'm done. 30 minutes tops.

To me, it is just a party. One big fucking awesome weeklong house party.

And that's all I need out of it.

[Eric]

To me, it is just a party. One big fucking awesome weeklong house party.

I'm pretty much in this camp.
I once described it to The Boyfriend as that perfect backyard party you attended once in the summer - friends, food, drinking if you wanted it, great conversation, silly as all hell, very serious moments, great music, shitty music, that one annoying person you had to dodge, the one hottie that you got to make out with in the corner before bouncing on ... it just goes on for a week.

A lot of fun, occasionally a little drama, and I wake up with a smile when I get back home (the one with The Boyfriend & the cats - for me the playa is Club Med for Freaks, not "home")

[Ratty]

Ranger Magnum and Eric, I agree. For me, it's a vacation. Sure I prep all year but the anticipation is part of the fun. I'm increasing the time on the playa each year by helping more. Work adds to the enjoyment. It ain't mystical. It's a week with my burner friends that I only see there. A party.

[DoctorIknow]

... I never understood why people call burningman "home".

I have some kind of built in cringe when anyone says "Welcome Home" to me.

I just put on my sincere smile face...I truly believe they mean well after all,,,

,,,,although I'd smile a real smile if the DPW replaced their "Fuck Your Burn" to "Welcome Home," said with the mean kind of passion they are famous for....

[Savannah]

Not tired yet, no.

[FIGJAM]

I always interpreted "Home" as just being more comfortable on the playa than in defaultia.

[DrYes]

Maybe the most important thing to keep in mind: for what it costs to do Burning Man comfortably, you can fly to the beautiful tropical place of your choice with clear water and white sand, and all you have to bring is some shorts, a few t shirts, and sunglasses.
Try it. It's REALLY nice. And so easy!

I'm midway through a SE Asian vacation that has been mostly exactly that (barring a couple city stops and some time in the jungle). Gorgeous islands, clear water, white sand, and the best diving of my life.

You know what I had a nightmare about last night? That it was Sunday morning after the burn and I realized I'd somehow forgotten to go. Terrifying and tear-inducing.

Maybe it's because I'm in the Bay Area and so it's not much of a slog to get there, but I also don't quite understand the "it's so hard" vibe. It'll only be my 6th year but I don't find preparing for it or attending it anything but joyful. I love packing my car for it. I love getting whichever birgins I'm helping this year organized and educated. I love making the art I'm going to bring. Pretty much the only thing I don't love is leaving when it's over.

[ranger magnum]

I've made the drive to and from it's own vacation. I have a bunch of favorite stops and restaurants that I hit on the way up. Plus I take a nice cool swim in the Walker river, about 100 miles south of fernley.

[mudpuppy000]

I always interpreted "Home" as just being more comfortable on the playa than in defaultia.

Yeah, this is how I always interpreted it. For some people it's the only place they can be themselves, at least until they figure out how to incorporate that into their real lives.

[Leo]

Not losing interest, but there are other places I want to visit in my lifetime. With limited vacation time I have to make a choice between Burning Man or some other cool destination for my summer vacation. Doing a road trip this summer to Arches, Zion, and the Grand Canyon. Hope to return to the playa in 2016.

[Simon of the Playa]

it is just a party. One big fucking awesome weeklong house party.

right.



so,



no talking about the 100 year plan.



got it.

[Simon of the Playa]

harvey.jpg

[Winslow]

As a virgin, this is the most interesting thread i've read on eplaya. Thanks for the perspective everyone.

[AntiM]

I was raised a Navy brat, moving every two years. I was always most comfortable out west, specifically in the desert, closely followed by the California coast. We dad finally retired and settled down, it was in Utah, where I was miserable and out of place. At 18, I moved to San Francisco and into Project Artaud. Naked dance troupe, artists, sculpture, murals, a free box, spontaneous potlucks, a slack rope, and I wore whatever I pleased, which was usually very goth/Victorian/steampunk, decades before they were a thing. I was there about a year, a formational period in my life, formative in my way of thinking how life could be. I felt at home there, I was sad to leave.

So when I hit the playa, 35 years later, it was strongly reminiscent of Artaud. More than a little, Pepe Ozan resided at Artaud, the place I once called Home. How many other Artaudians were in attendance? I don't know, but the spirit was much the same. So indeed, the vibe for me was a return to a happy time in my youth; it did feel like coming home.

[Token]

The things that kept BM fresh for me over the long haul:

1. Never ever do what I do in real life on the playa.
2. Change it up every year.

I think the first is the key enabler. In the 10 years I've been since the Millenium, never once did I actually do anything related to electrical engineering, computers, software.

Carpentry, welding, fabrication, yes, but no profession related stuff.

And the change up is absolutely a must. People, places, big theme camp, little theme camp, solo, with a shitload of virgins, a crap ton of jaded surly veterans, big art installation, one month, three days, mutant vehicle, pedestrian, drive in, fly in, and on an' on.

Free your mind Neo.

[FIGJAM]

http://sfist.com/2013/08/14/25-reasons- ... ng-man.php

[CyanEssence]

I always interpreted "Home" as just being more comfortable on the playa than in defaultia.

Yeah, this is how I always interpreted it. For some people it's the only place they can be themselves, at least until they figure out how to incorporate that into their real lives.

+1 to this. I didn't understand why people called it "home" until I finally became comfortable enough to do things like... i don't know... cook bacon naked in the middle of the day with strangers. Then, I started realizing why people call it home, or at least why I would - because it is just as comfortable as home. For the record, it took all of three days into my first burn for this to happen.

Sheeeeit. All this drama over a week camping in the desert?

That what happens when you assign some life changing galactic revelation to a party just cuz you had a great time.

If it is fun no more, drop the dogma and don't go.

Expectations are killing yall.

Token, I think I agree with what you are saying. Before I ever went, I heard a lot of people go on about Burning Man being this big spiritual event, and some even rolling their eyes at people who talked about BM as if it were "just a party." After going, I realized that it is more party and not so much a spiritual event - it's no solo vision quest. I am sure a person could have a spiritual experience out there, but they could have a spiritual experience just about anywhere, so it's not BM in and of itself that is the source of that. Or at least, it hasn't been that way for me. Yet.

To the OP. I did lose interest in BM around Nov. 2014. I registered for tickets anyway, just in case. I got a little excited when I thought about volunteering. Then I got really excited when I got invited to work on an installation.

[Shoeshine]

Perhaps thread necromancy... but here goes from someone slightly on the fence.

This will only be my 6th year going but last year I had my hardest time yet. I managed to lose my yurt off the roof rack halfway up the 395, a giant POOF of wood splinters and polyiso shreds. Ended up sleeping in my truck for 9 days. I was bringing a small MV that took two days of work on playa to get running, and required a lot of babysitting and repairs the whole week. I had some great interactions as always but the whole thing just seemed like so much work.

add to that, I have an art show the weekend before I normally leave for the burn which has to take up a good amount of my time and focus.

My first year I went as (a small) part of a large art installation. My second year I helped (again in a small way) build the temple. Many months of work leading up to the event. (and some awesome payoff) years after that were spent as a workhorse getting a new camp established. (camp functioning and my input now not so critical)

so am I going again? well yes. I have my ticket. Can I dredge up the enthusiasm that I have had in years past? no.

I guess the question is does my anticipation make my burn? I'm honestly hoping not.

I've identified a smallish interactive project on my camp frontage that I can run at will and shut down at will but should be fun as long as I'm having fun. Hopefully this will make my time both meaningful and also my own.

Like the OP and other contributors, I wouldn't spend the time and money if it were just a party in the desert or a vacation. I can have a way more relaxing time in Baja for half the cost.

Will it work? time will tell.

YMMV
shoe

[wraith]

I tell everyone on the fence about going: Buy the ticket, first go 'round. Put it on your refrigerator. Can always sell it.

Honestly, I think this is pretty terrible advice to give anyone these days. The demand's gotten high enough that it's no longer a given that the really motivated people will get tickets, and the remaining wishy-washy maybes can provide a cushion for the last-minute inspired.

The only people who can afford to be in a position of not knowing if they're going until the last minute are either rich enough to run plug-and-play, or in the Bay area/Reno, and advising people sit on tickets on a maybe-if when people who absolutely want to go need tickets in hand to make sure they aren't blowing four or five digits on prep they won't use is poor form.

[mudpuppy000]

Like the OP and other contributors, I wouldn't spend the time and money if it were just a party in the desert or a vacation. I can have a way more relaxing time in Baja for half the cost.

I don't think we'd be sitting here all year long discussing the event if it was just "some party in the desert"

Or then again, maybe it is just some party in the desert that a lot of fucking awesome people show up to.

[ZaphodBurner]

A whole hell of a lot more people are interested in going to Burning Man than there are tickets available, so, my suggestion is that those who are tired of riding the merry-go-round get off and give somebody else a chance to ride. There will be no hard feelings.

[FIGJAM]

A whole hell of a lot more people are interested in going to Burning Man than there are tickets available, so, my suggestion is that those who are tired of riding the merry-go-round get off and give somebody else a chance to ride. There will be no hard feelings.

They only get to ride if they will help push!!!

[sandfly]

Reading this made me feel like not going, because it's all just becoming too corporatized:
Burning Man tells Dancetronauts to get off its lawn because performers are too loud http://burners.me/2015/06/14/dancetronauts-too-loud/

Reading this, posted on the Dancetronauts site, renewed my decision to go this year:
Watch This: Nine-year-old girl divulges on first Burning Man experience http://www.dancingastronaut.com/2015/02 ... xperience/