Looking to join a camp near the 4-5 side

[xzlostzx]

Greetings Eplaya people,
I am a first timer looking to join a camp near 4 to 5 area. I know this is a long shot, but can't win if you don't play, right? I have been planning since I watched my friends pack up and leave for burning man last year. They are all attending this year as well, but due to wanting to maintain peaceful and loving towards my naked friend, I am unable to camp with them. Yet, being near the area where they were placed (4:45 and G) would be nice, hence the search for a camp in this general area. I've got my ticket now I just need to find some awesome people to camp with. A little about myself, I am a 32 year old lady who loves to wander around and explore life. I have been on a mission as of late to try new things and push my own limits. I went skydiving this year to usher in my birthday, and let me tell you, it was totally worth it. I am open to alternative lifestyles and comfortable in my own skin. I love corny/off-the-wall jokes, and don't mind putting in my fair share of work. Helping others makes me happy. Anyways, feel free to ask me questions or email me. Thanks again!

[Captain Goddammit]

You seem to think camps are motels... camps are friends who camp together. You can't even camp with your own friends? WTF.
Why would a camp want you, when all you want is their placement?
Coming on here telling what you want FROM a camp, rather than what YOU bring TO it, usually isn't the most effective tactic.

[Eric]

As a long time Burner your post raises a couple of things that could be considered "red flags" for a camp, which I'm sure you didn't intend (as seen from the above post). Might I ask for a little clarification? I'm sure any camp is going to want it before inviting you do join them.

due to wanting to maintain peaceful and loving towards my naked friend, I am unable to camp with them

What does this mean? You don't like naked people, or you don't like your friend naked? Is there an issue with your friends nudity that could cause problems in your potential new camp? Is there going to be a problem if people in your new camp are naked?

Probably the biggest question though: why aren't these friends letting you camp with them?

Again, I don't want to put words in your mouth, but I can guarantee these thoughts are going through the heads of anyone who's been before. Clarifying them will potentially help you find a camp.

[xzlostzx]

Wow, ok, let me try this again...The reason I am unable to camp with my friends, is because I am dating/seeing/sleeping with one of them, the naked friend as he coined a few years ago. Him and I have discussed it and in order to keep our relationship stable, he thinks it best if we do not camp together. Which is fair enough, I get it and do not want to put undo stress on what we have. Having a different place to lay my head at night as I do in default world would be beneficial.

I absolutely DO NOT think that camps are Motels/Hotels/whatever. I know that a lot of hard work goes into getting a camp set up and keeping it going. I want to be a part of something bigger than myself. Being new to this whole thing, I don't know what I bring, other than myself and my willingness to help out where I can. May it be running to grab ice for others or helping out with set-up/meals/etc.

I have no problem with naked people. And thank you Eric for being understanding, I did not at all mean to come off as how I did. Anyways, if this does not clarify things, I apologize.

[VultureChow]

I've heard of couples bringing seperate sleeping arrangements, but not entirely separate camps. Especially as you're a virgin I would think your partner would want to help you. Besides, watching a virgin experience BM for the first time is wonderful. Second only to your own virgin year.

[Ratty]

xzlostzx, I kind of understand. To each their own. My adult son and God child are both welcome to become burners. I'll help them prepare and they can camp nearby but this is my vacation. I won't have anything disrupting it. Selfish? You bet. The world has 50 weeks to suck up my time and energy. I have 2 weeks a year to do it my way.

It's not unreasonable for 2 people to camp separately. I know several that do it.

[Elderberry]

I've heard of couples bringing seperate sleeping arrangements, but not entirely separate camps. Especially as you're a virgin I would think your partner would want to help you. Besides, watching a virgin experience BM for the first time is wonderful. Second only to your own virgin year.

The first year my partner and I were together he didn't even want me to go to Burning Man with him!

And we've have several couples (especially couples new to the relationship) that have had their partners stay in a different camp. So this is in no way unusual to me.

[VultureChow]

Good to know. Knowing Grai, I'd be afraid to let him get more than 50 feet from me.

[Dr. Pyro]

Good to know. Knowing Grai, I'd be afraid to let him get more than 50 feet from me.

What a coincidence. I wouldn't want Grai within 50 feet of me.

[Savannah]

I've heard of couples bringing seperate sleeping arrangements, but not entirely separate camps. Especially as you're a virgin I would think your partner would want to help you. Besides, watching a virgin experience BM for the first time is wonderful. Second only to your own virgin year.

The first year my partner and I were together he didn't even want me to go to Burning Man with him!

And we've have several couples (especially couples new to the relationship) that have had their partners stay in a different camp. So this is in no way unusual to me.

Not unusual to me either! Every couple is different.

[Captain Goddammit]

Ok so your boyfriend wants you out of the way so he can bang whoever he wants (there is zero other reason he would need to ditch you out there), now how about the other issue: there's a hell of a lot more to camping with other people than their location!

[gaminwench]

Captain, I respectfully disagree.

It sounds like OP and naked friend don't live together; I'm not sure sharing close quarters on the playa would be a great way to find out about an SO's little personal quirks.
I have, often, found it better to have separate sleeping spaces on the playa; this with long-term live-in partners.
Having one's own space to go to in time of need is a good thing, in my experience.

Also, not every man is a horn dog who wants to bang every moving thing in sight; that does seem to be your personal take on men, but I've found that it just ain't so.

[trilobyte]

I'll disagree with you too, Captain...at least partially. We don't really know any kind of romantic situation (and who even really needs to know).

What I do agree with is that a camp is a whole hell of a lot more than simply a location. If a campmate is truly joining the group, then it's about people, and about whatever theme or central idea the camp is based around. Putting location at the top of the list (or making it the only criteria) kind of says that you have little to no intention of actually joining the group or participating in the camp, you just want the real estate.

If that's the case, the good news is the target area has a whole lot of unreserved space (unshaded areas on the map). If you plan your arrival you can simply head towards that neighborhood and grab the nearest available spot.

[Jovankat]

I know a couple of couples who don't camp together, I actually have an old friend coming for the first time this year and he's camping with me while his GF who has been a few times is camping across playa with her usual camp. It's not that unusual and despite the lack of credit the Captain is giving his gender it's not always about getting extra side action.

[Joeln]

Also, not every man is a horn dog who wants to bang every moving thing in sight; that does seem to be your personal take on men, but I've found that it just ain't so.

Thanks Gamin! As a youth I just couldn't relate to my male peers who were so conquest-oriented. Lately guys talk about their sexual appetites and all I can say to them is "that's not how it's been for me." Sex is sweet, but it only drives me when I am feeling bad or lonely.

[xzlostzx]

First of all let me thank those that are kind enough not to jump to the worst possible conclusion, its a breath of fresh air.

Second, I absolutely know that a camp is more than a location. Its about people, its about the relationships/dynamics that are formed in the wee-hours of the morning/night over crispy bacon or a hot cup of coffee. Its an experience that cannot be bought/sold/duplicated. The reason I didn't put more of a filter on exactly what kind of camp I'm looking to join other than location, is because I am inexperienced and feel that the right camp will come along. I have faith in humanity and that things will work out. I am looking for a camp that is made up of people who want to get to know others, to share experiences, to have a good time while not trying to bring others down for their own cruel amusement.

Third, Gaminwench was correct, I do not live with my naked friend in real life, so it makes sense that we do not live together at the Burn. In staying in line with that the Burningman site, Burning Man is particularly hard on couples. So, knowing/respecting boundaries is important. Hence, respecting my relationship by seeking a different camp.

Finally, I am doing my best to navigate the waters of this forum and seem to be missing the mark with at least 25% of you.

[Sham]

Good to know. Knowing Grai, I'd be afraid to let him get more than 50 feet from me.

What a coincidence. I wouldn't want Grai within 50 feet of me.

I would say that you two band together and keep Grai 100 feet from both of you!

[Captain Goddammit]

With all due respect, you're all fools.
There is SOMETHING up when you bring your partner to their first Burning Man and tell them screw you, you're on your own go camp somewhere else.
I can't imagine doing that to Charlie.

[VultureChow]

You know what? Pay zeroattention to us. I'm not being sarcastic at all. What sounds super weird to me might work out perfectly for you. I hope you find a camp. If not, you can totally make your own and find plenty of people nearby to make your own community.

Who knows, by Tuesday, you might be pulling up stakes to move in with your partner. By Thursday, you'll be getting married by a guy wearing nothing but a gold cockring. And by Sunday, you might be divorced.

It's fucking Burning Man! Burn away.

[Dr Helix]

With all due respect, you're all fools.
There is SOMETHING up when you bring your partner to their first Burning Man and tell them screw you, you're on your own go camp somewhere else.
I can't imagine doing that to Charlie.

I don't say there something up. But I will agree there's something crummy in the attitude. It's her first Burn and the only people she knows (including the relationship) throw her to the wolves? Not much of a caring, sharing group I would say. Now if she had another established group to join, I would say okay. But this seems a bit harsh to me.

[Elderberry]

With all due respect, you're all fools.
There is SOMETHING up when you bring your partner to their first Burning Man and tell them screw you, you're on your own go camp somewhere else.
I can't imagine doing that to Charlie.

That's because that's you. And there's nothing wrong with that. But you can't project who you are onto others. People are all different.

In my case, the relationship was new, and he did want to bang anything he could. (Ironically, he didn't. But I think knowing he could have, allowed him not to. If that makes any sense.)

Since that year, we stay together, do some things together, but for the most part we still have our own seperate burns.

[xzlostzx]

With all due respect, you're all fools.
There is SOMETHING up when you bring your partner to their first Burning Man and tell them screw you, you're on your own go camp somewhere else.
I can't imagine doing that to Charlie.

That's because that's you. And there's nothing wrong with that. But you can't project who you are onto others. People are all different.

In my case, the relationship was new, and he did want to bang anything he could. (Ironically, he didn't. But I think knowing he could have, allowed him not to. If that makes any sense.)

Since that year, we stay together, do some things together, but for the most part we still have our own seperate burns.

Note to self, do not attempt to mention relationship matters to others. We are not cookie cutter people, we all have our own ways of dealing with relationships. My partner did not say "screw you", we have discussed what would be best for our relationship and this seemed like a good idea to us.

[Captain Goddammit]

Ok let's leave the banging who he wants out of it. I'll give you that.

But what about taking your partner to their first Burning Man and saying "Ok get the hell out, you're on your own, go camp by yourself?
WTF is that? Am I the only sane person here??

[lucky420]

i understand where youre coming from Captain...

but to each his/her own

[ACfromSAC]

I like to think of myself as being pretty open minded, but I'm with the Captain on this one. That's a little weird. I brought my girlfriend to her first burn... and it took a few days for her to really 'get it' and become comfortable. No amount of ePlaya studying or Googling or YouTube-ing can really prepare you for what it's like to be in BRC... it's a strange place... and it's vast... and a bit overwhelming at times. Most of all, the fact that watching virgins have their eyes opened to the magic of a burn is the best! I've made a point to bring along a virgin every year after my first burn and it never fails to bring me a ton of joy seeing them soak it all in for the first time. I hope naked comes around to the idea of at least allowing you into his camp so he can experience your first burn with you.

[Dr Helix]

Ok let's leave the banging who he wants out of it. I'll give you that.

But what about taking your partner to their first Burning Man and saying "Ok get the hell out, you're on your own, go camp by yourself?
WTF is that? Am I the only sane person here??

Hey! I said that two posts ago! You are not the lone voice in the wilderness Cap.

[Token]

Am I the only sane person here??

Yes, but if I wanted sane I'd go to my office board and actually work today.

[Jovankat]

Careful Captain, you'll get yourself kicked out of the cult of self reliance.

[VultureChow]

Careful Captain, you'll get yourself kicked out of the cult of self reliance.

I'm sure he's got a bottle of Jerkins and a gym sock somewhere in that big ol boat.

[GreyCoyote]

Careful Captain, you'll get yourself kicked out of the cult of self reliance.

I'm sure he's got a bottle of Jerkins and a gym sock somewhere in that big ol boat.

Wait. Rewind. When did Jerkins Lotion go out of style and WHY WASNT I NOTIFIED?!?!?

Oops. That was out loud, wasnt it?

Bottom line for me: everybody burns differently. If you want to coat yourself in marmalade and walk around BRC begging to be licked frommstem to stern, I'm totally cool with that. Just please stay away from any fire ants....