Looking for some ideas of proposal

[H+H]

hi guys!

I am a virgin burner from Asia. Planning to to BM in Aug with my GF. We have been together for almost one year.

I love her very much and would like to give her a big surprise, special proposal while we are in BM

Appreciate you could share some of your great idea for discussion.

Hope the idea is easy to execute because both of us are virgin burner and long distance travel to US, not convenient to carry too much stuff. better at night with some fire.

It's great to have some nice volunteers to join the project.

Thanks alot!

[Ratty]

H+H, Can I suggest that you propose marriage in a less hectic and stressful environment. Something closer to home and private. I've know 3 people that proposed on vacations and were turned down. No marriage and a lousy vacation. Sorry to be such a bummer/realist but oh well, that's my heartfelt advice.

[gaminwench]

Carry the ring/ token/ missive, with you at all times.

As you go throughout the week, make friends, have experiences.

When it feels right, DO IT; pull the ring/ token/ missive out and DO IT.


Love and hugs to Ratty.

[Chowski]

I agree with the last poster - have the ring on you at all times and pull it out when the time is right. You will know. There will be things you two do together that will be funny, or exciting, or stressful, but there will also be moments of intense joy and connection and togetherness - feel that moment happen, and pull out that ring. Good luck!

[Token]

Carry the ring/ token/ missive, with you at all times.

As you go throughout the week, make friends, have experiences.

When it feels right, DO IT; pull the ring/ token/ missive out and DO IT.

How the Hellco did I get dragged into the middle of this?

I ain't following you around and ther is no DO-ing IT with me.

[WileE13]

I proposed to my girlfriend at last years Burn. Stayed up all night and walked around by myself as I like to do one night each Burn, then woke her at dawn and took her out to the Temple. We walked though the place, then, in the shadow of the temple cast by the rising sun, when she was at her emotional weakest (I like to joke about that to this day) I got down on one knee, gave her my little on the fly speech and popped the question. It was probably the best proposal opportunity I could ever find, and she loved it.

My advice, make the moment memorable and intimate. Don't propose in the middle of a raging party, find a quiet area with some significance to you and her, then just say what is in your heart and let her know how you feel.

One other thing, don't ask the question unless you are 100% sure she'll say yes or it could be an awkward Burn from then on out.

[WileE13]

Oh, and some more advice, don't bring a valuable ring, stuff gets lost easily on the Playa. It is the symbolism that matters, not the value of the item. I took a 3 dollar ring we got during a previous vacation and wired an LED chip onto it for her engagement ring.

[jdeanpaul]

Just do it when she least expect it

[DoctorIknow]

Go for extensive bike rides together, every morning perhaps both of you keeping in mind to discover an art piece that maybe you will come back to when you need to quiet down and appreciate the art and peace it emanates to you. If a time arrives when she suggests going back to that peaceful place,,,,could be the moment.

[H+H]

I proposed to my girlfriend at last years Burn. Stayed up all night and walked around by myself as I like to do one night each Burn, then woke her at dawn and took her out to the Temple. We walked though the place, then, in the shadow of the temple cast by the rising sun, when she was at her emotional weakest (I like to joke about that to this day) I got down on one knee, gave her my little on the fly speech and popped the question. It was probably the best proposal opportunity I could ever find, and she loved it.

My advice, make the moment memorable and intimate. Don't propose in the middle of a raging party, find a quiet area with some significance to you and her, then just say what is in your heart and let her know how you feel.

One other thing, don't ask the question unless you are 100% sure she'll say yes or it could be an awkward Burn from then on out.

Thank you so much for your sincere suggestion!

[H+H]

hi guys! thanks all of you for the suggestion.

I just got an idea, but it need all of you to help.

each of you help to bring 1 stick of flower, can be fake or real, any type.

One day morning around 6am, put your flower in front of the temple and make it a HEART SHAPE and i take out my ring.

will this work?

[BBadger]

Flowers are MOOPy and you can't expect or depend on anyone you don't personally know (and sometimes not even them) to participate in your group event. People will have other things to do, forget to attend, not be in the area, or simply not bother. If you want to do something special, you need to take the effort to ensure that you can make it happen without the involvement of other people.

[DoctorIknow]

hi guys! thanks all of you for the suggestion.

I just got an idea...........

It's impossible for virgin burner to not have plans, anxieties or expectations of "what I want to do out there."

There must be 1000+ posts on just this site that suggest coming with a completely blank canvas to be painted upon as the days after arrival progress.

With love, I have to say; you've had a one year relationship with your partner, but I've seen relationships of 25 years together dissolve out there, and one year after the blowup, there was no mending, no apologies, no asking for forgiveness.

I know a couple who every year arrive at the gate, and go to live at different theme camps, far away from each other. If they run into each other somewhere, they say hello, then part. They meet on Saturday night at sunset, and from that point on, are together again. They've done this for years as they KNOW what can happen to the STONGEST relationships out there.

Yes: make or buy a ring that can be lost, don't make plans involving other people, take the ring with you, and it's POSSIBLE the right moment will appear like magic. You'll know it IF it happens. If it doesn't, have a great rest of the burn and travels home, and for sure, a magical moment may happen in the default world.

[trilobyte]

I'm giving this a nudge to the Q&A board, since that's a better fit for general q&a about the event.

In response to the question, I wish you luck. There's already been some great advice given, namely along the 'strongly reconsider it' department. Trying to force a proposal into a first burn sounds on the surface to be, well, forced. Go without expectations, both of you. Burning Man will either achieve great significance for you on its own merits, or it won't (many first time burners choose never to come back). Regardless of what you choose to do, good luck with the trip and relationship!

[maladroit]

It's your thing, you get to decide how/when/where to do it.

I'd only suggest by way of general relationship advice: it should not be a surprise that you are going to propose, just a surprise in the time and place you choose to do it. It's not a question you ask when you're 50/50 on whether they'll say yes.

[H+H]

ok. after receiving so much sincere advice, i think i am clear what to do next!

Thanks everyone for your encouragement! Wish you all have fun in BM.

see you there!

[Lenstar]

[quote="Ratty"]hectic and stressful environment.[/quote]

.....interesting point of view. You must be a barrel of laughs on the final days

[GreyCoyote]

hectic and stressful environment.

.....interesting point of view. You must be a barrel of laughs on the final days

Ratty is a LOT of fun all the way through the entire burn. Personal experience. And she kindly took the time to share some good, heartfelt advice with the OP which he is free to consider (or not).

The burn hasnt even started, yet you seem to be a bit cranky already. Pot. Kettle. Black. Much?

[Lenstar]

Takes one to know one

[wendy645]

... How did it go?

[FlyingMonkey]

Carry the ring/ token/ missive, with you at all times.

As you go throughout the week, make friends, have experiences.

When it feels right, DO IT; pull the ring/ token/ missive out and DO IT.

How the Hellco did I get dragged into the middle of this?

I ain't following you around and ther is no DO-ing IT with me.

Awe come on Token. When it feels right DO IT. It's Burning Man

Fuck! I got sucked in to an old dead thread again. Why do you people keep doing this to me.

The OP has gone cold mic with only 4 posts last year. I don't think we will ever know..........

But it got me thinking......Has anyone ever heard of someone proposing at the Temple? It sounds creepy at first but the more I think about it the more I think the momentary positive energy & total reversal of the vibe would be awesome if done right & of course respecting others out there.

[BBadger]

But it got me thinking......Has anyone ever heard of someone proposing at the Temple? It sounds creepy at first but the more I think about it the more I think the momentary positive energy & total reversal of the vibe would be awesome if done right & of course respecting others out there.

Nothing like having a bunch of mourners at your marriage proposal.

[FlyingMonkey]

But it got me thinking......Has anyone ever heard of someone proposing at the Temple? It sounds creepy at first but the more I think about it the more I think the momentary positive energy & total reversal of the vibe would be awesome if done right & of course respecting others out there.

Nothing like having a bunch of mourners at your marriage proposal.

I think it could change the mood like flipping a switch. Even if just for a little while. I've been there & even had to post a memorial. As hard as that is, if someone started to propose right there in front of me I would have focused more on their happiness than my grief. It's hard to focus on your own sorrow when confronted with pure love & affection.

Even people who haven't lost anyone go in to the temple & start weeping. You could go in there totally happy & in one or two seconds be sad just because everyone else around you is sad. But what if two or more people went in there happy, did something very loving & started changing the mood of the people around them who then in turn passed that on to the people around them......

I can see where that could cascade & change the dynamic very quickly.

We are affected by the people and energy around us all the time. Not in a magic crystal pyramid way but with our facial expressions, body language & outward expression of our moods & I think we can do things to affect others around us. Have you ever had a day that just sucked & then someone with a upbeat attitude walks in & makes you happy? Just take this to the next level.

Where you see something dreadful & negative I see the possibility to do something beautiful, positive & share that feeling with others. That's a gift.

Of course I could be totally wrong & it would suck. Especially if the other person did not accept the proposal.

[Ratty]

My parents got married at Forest Lawn. Mortuary and cemetery. If you live in Los Angeles then you know it by all the famous movie stars buried there. Yes it sounds weird and my parents were anything but. There happens to be a beautiful little chapel there. I've seen the reception photos taken at my Grandma's house. Funny, I never saw a wedding picture. I would really love to see the invitations.

[BBadger]

Nothing like having a bunch of mourners at your marriage proposal.

...

I can see where that could cascade & change the dynamic very quickly.

We are affected by the people and energy around us all the time. Not in a magic crystal pyramid way but with our facial expressions, body language & outward expression of our moods & I think we can do things to affect others around us. Have you ever had a day that just sucked & then someone with a upbeat attitude walks in & makes you happy? Just take this to the next level.

Where you see something dreadful & negative I see the possibility to do something beautiful, positive & share that feeling with others. That's a gift.

Yeah, you never really know what the reaction could be. People treat the temple as a place for grieving and loss, but it could also be a place of celebration for a life well lived, or a life to begin. There's no guide or user manual.




Plus, I think it'd be pretty funny to see other people wailing and rending their garments during a marriage proposal.

[FlyingMonkey]