Can't make this shit up!

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Canoe
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Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Thu Jan 06, 2022 3:39 pm

> "Gov. Ron DeSantis has picked a replacement who thinks COVID vaccines are overrated."
O.K. No surprise there.
... [Ladapo]has been associated with a right-wing group of physicians whose members include a physician who believes infertility and miscarriages are the result of having sex with demons and witches during dreams.
Seems this physician may have had some issues with infertility and miscarriages, correlated that with their dreams, and has decided that is causation, rather than face what medical science says about their infertility and miscarriages. Not too sure what medical science would say about their dreams...

https://www.orlandosentinel.com/opinion ... story.html
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
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, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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Canoe
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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Thu Jan 06, 2022 3:51 pm

Seen on social media recently:
- My sister is pregnant! I can't wait to see if I'm going to be an Aunt or an Uncle.
- Triplets! No way I could stand being pregnant for 27 months!
- Should American schools teach Arabic Numerals as a part of their curriculum?
- Does anyone know where I can get a booster vaccine without getting the 1st & 2nd jabs?
4.669
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That's one word I regret googling during breakfast.
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
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, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by some seeing eye » Fri Jan 07, 2022 3:45 pm

Stupidity meets stupidity

Two officials presenting arguments on Friday to the U.S. Supreme Court seeking to block vaccine mandates ordered by President Joe Biden's administration have tested positive for COVID-19 and will make their cases remotely, their offices said.

Ohio Solicitor General Benjamin Flowers and Louisiana Solicitor General Liz Murrill will argue against the vaccination and testing requirements by phone, according to their offices.

https://www.newsweek.com/justice-neil-g ... ar-1667015

Um - https://www.cdc.gov/flu/about/burden/index.html

Some have compared Gorsuch to the fictional Supreme Court nominee in Don't Look Up. His mom was a sad EPA administrator.
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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Fri Jan 07, 2022 5:19 pm

People in the 1960s
- "I'd better watch what I say or the government will wiretap my house!"
People today
"Hey Wiretap! Do you have a recipie for pancakes?"
Just heard a customer two aisles over say "Hey. I think this is that special glass that doesn't shatter if you drop it.", followed by the sound of shattering glass.
To avoid deer strikes, Finland is painting deer antlers with reflective paint
.
Reindeer antlers.jpg
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That's one word I regret googling during breakfast.
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
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, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Fri Jan 07, 2022 9:35 pm

U.S. teacher arrested for driving to a drive-through Covid-19 testing centre for additional testing for her covid-positive thirteen year old son - whom she had locked in the trunk over fear of exposure.

Court documents said the witnesses told Beam she would not receive a COVID test until the child was removed from the trunk and placed in the back seat of the vehicle. Authorities were able to view surveillance cameras showing the moment the child exited the trunk of the car and got in the back seat.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-59919105
https://www.click2houston.com/news/loca ... -confirms/
4.669
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That's one word I regret googling during breakfast.
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
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, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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Canoe
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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Fri Jan 07, 2022 9:42 pm

Nod to an earlier era

Three pirates set adrift at sea.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-africa-59913513
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That's one word I regret googling during breakfast.
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
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, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Fri Jan 07, 2022 9:44 pm

Discharged Norweigen conscripts told to return underwear

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2022/ ... s-supplies
4.669
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That's one word I regret googling during breakfast.
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
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, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by some seeing eye » Mon Jan 10, 2022 7:56 pm

https://thehill.com/changing-america/we ... -a-million

I guess if you don't test for it, it doesn't exist! It is like the data scientist they fired and then arrested https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rebekah_Jones.
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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Simon of the Playa » Tue Jan 11, 2022 4:57 am

538CF92E-7C94-41A0-86FD-F2E8B8CCF813.jpeg

https://twitter.com/PeteSouza/status/14 ... 59554?s=20
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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by some seeing eye » Tue Jan 11, 2022 1:26 pm

"In a town where some of the wealthiest people in the country keep lavish homes, glittering and vast against a backdrop of sweeping mountains, officials are mulling over a plan to allow Ketchum's nurses, teachers, and service workers to sleep in tents in the city park as rent and housing costs continue to soar out of their grasp."

https://www.ktvb.com/article/news/local ... e379e0300a
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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Simon of the Playa » Wed Jan 12, 2022 11:55 am

The ex-girlfriend, whose name is being withheld by NBC News to respect her privacy, has been in talks for months with prosecutors about an immunity deal. Under a possible deal, she would avoid prosecution for obstruction of justice in return for testifying in the investigation into whether Gaetz in 2017 had sex with a 17-year-old female for money and whether months later he and others violated a federal law prohibiting people for paying for prostitutes overseas.

https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/justic ... g-n1287352
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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Savannah » Wed Jan 12, 2022 3:22 pm

Simon of the Playa wrote:
Wed Jan 12, 2022 11:55 am
The ex-girlfriend, whose name is being withheld by NBC News to respect her privacy, has been in talks for months with prosecutors about an immunity deal. Under a possible deal, she would avoid prosecution for obstruction of justice in return for testifying in the investigation into whether Gaetz in 2017 had sex with a 17-year-old female for money and whether months later he and others violated a federal law prohibiting people for paying for prostitutes overseas.

https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/justic ... g-n1287352
I just read about this 5 minutes ago! . . . Ain't life strange. :lol:

I am not a Redditor, but there are some wonderful articles like these on https://www.reddit.com/r/nottheonion.
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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by ^Rhino! » Wed Jan 12, 2022 11:21 pm

I'm proud of the fact I still don't own a gun.

I'm going to get a gun rack for my truck, though, I intend it to carry an umbrella and a fishing pole.
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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Simon of the Playa » Thu Jan 13, 2022 5:20 am

Lindsey Graham wants McConnell to form a ‘working relationship’ with Trump

Republican Senator Lindsey Graham has hit out at Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, saying he won’t back McConnell to lead the GOP unless McConnell has a “working relationship” with Former President Donald Trump.

During an interview with Fox News on Wednesday, Graham blasted Senator McConnell for his broken-down relationship with the former president.

“Elections are about the future,” Graham said. “If you want to be a Republican leader in the House or the Senate, you have to have a working relationship with President Donald Trump.”

“It’s his nomination if he wants it, and I think he’ll get reelected in 2024.”

“I liked Senator McConnell,” Graham added. “But here’s the question — can Senator McConnell effectively work with the leader of the Republican Party, Donald Trump?”


TRUMP is BLACKMAILING LADY G AND KEVIN McCARTHY



https://mobile.twitter.com/acyn/status/ ... 2292634626
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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Simon of the Playa » Thu Jan 13, 2022 5:49 am

im sorry, but this deserves a two-fer today..



Holy Shit These People Are Fucking Crazy...


"Some of Protzman’s supporters have also spotted that Trump’s official announcement mentions ‘live entertainment’ as part of the rally, and suggested that this will involve a band made up entirely of dead musicians and singers, including Michael Jackson, Prince, Whitney Houston, Janis Joplin, Tupac, and John Lennon,” VICE said.

The report also said that this prediction follows in the footsteps of his original claim when he and his group went to Rolling Stones concert in Dallas, “the band members were replaced by Jackson, Prince, and JFK Jr., with Aaliyah providing backup vocals.”
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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by some seeing eye » Thu Jan 13, 2022 12:37 pm

^^^^ federal sex trafficking of a minor has a mandatory minimum of 10 years, then add ons for obstruction and conspiracy. Yo' daddy is not going to be able to save the trust fund kid. I would wager Matt will try the Theranos defense of popping out a baby any time.

@RandPaul once told a room full of students that “misinformation works”. And sometimes “I spread it”.
https://twitter.com/DrEricDing/status/1 ... 71552?s=20
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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Thu Jan 13, 2022 4:07 pm

Canoe wrote:
Wed Jan 12, 2022 9:38 am
(We shouldn't need to be discussing this...)
Also unknown: contrary to social media, any efficacy benefit provided by drinking one's own urine, the urine of someone who is infected, from someone who is recovered, from someone who treated themselves with horse-dewormer, or from a horse or cow treated with dewormer.
I don't know who did that, but we ain't gonna date.
And I hope they don't get any ideas from the studies on SARS-Cov-2 RNA, RNA bits, or antibodies detected in fecal matter.
twitter wrote: 2020: "I can't believe I have to say this, but don't drink Lysol"
2021: "I can't believe I have to say this, but don't take horse dewormer"
2022: "I can't believe I have to ---- you know what? Fuck it. Drink pee. I don't even care anymore."
4.669
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That's one word I regret googling during breakfast.
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
.
, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Sat Jan 15, 2022 11:05 am

January 6 insurrection rioters who tried to claim their belongings after breaking into Pelosi's office
[Following the January 6 insurrection storming the House,] As crews cleaned the US Capitol on January 7, 2021, the phone lines in House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's office began to ring.
Raskin wrote:One of the things I learned the next day was that there were lots of people calling Nancy Pelosi's office, asking whether there was a lost and found because they forgot their phone there, or they left their purse or what have you."The officers quickly got on the phone and said, yeah, just give us your name, your address, your social, you know, and we'll tie up those loose ends," Raskin said.
https://www.businessinsider.com/jamie-r ... -qa-2022-1
https://www.businessinsider.com/capitol ... kin-2022-1
4.669
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That's one word I regret googling during breakfast.
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
.
, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Sat Jan 15, 2022 11:37 am

"My dog needs five vaccines to stay in a pet hotel, but they let people who would rather drink pee than accept a life-saving vaccine fly on an airplane."
4.669
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That's one word I regret googling during breakfast.
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
.
, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Simon of the Playa » Sat Jan 15, 2022 5:40 pm

Canoe wrote:
Sat Jan 15, 2022 11:37 am
"My dog needs five vaccines to stay in a pet hotel, but they let people who would rather drink pee than accept a life-saving vaccine fly on an airplane."
015C415B-3460-4FDB-B4FF-5AEB0E2E560F.jpeg
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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by lucky420 » Sun Jan 16, 2022 6:38 am

You know shit sammiches are next, right?
Oh my god, it's HUGE!

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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Mon Jan 17, 2022 5:43 am

lucky420 wrote:
Sun Jan 16, 2022 6:38 am
You know shit sammiches are next, right?
Canoe wrote:
Wed Jan 12, 2022 9:38 am
And I hope they don't get any ideas from the studies on SARS-Cov-2 RNA, RNA bits, or antibodies detected in fecal matter.
That advanced from "if" to "when"...
Used 'fecal' hoping that those dumb enough to do it won't know that word, nor bother to look it up. For some reason, as the pile gets deeper, despite the height, width and mass, I get surer that there's got to be a pony in there somewhere.

From people who are little tired of people claiming to have a mind & independent thought falling for the misinformation from Russia, China & Iran, on vaccinations, masks & distancing.
On a 10" - 20" snow storm, blizzard in places, deeper in places.
In places, 1" of snow every 24 minutes. One weather report measured snow fall of 4.75" in an hour.
Big Weather says there's a snowstorm coming. But did you go outside to do your own research?
There's no snow!
Wake up!
Politicians: We're sending kids back to school on Monday.
Mother Nature: the fuck you are!
It's a hoax. All a ploy by Big Shovel to get us to buy their shovels and use them over and over. I mean every time I shovel, the stuff just comes back! Shovels don't work!
That must be a fake picture. I'm hearing that people are renting snow making machines to make the amount of snow look worse than what it really is.
The storm is mild!
The amount of snow doesn’t matter!
Accidents are happening “with” snow, not “from” snow!
We've got lots of tow trucks but no drivers!
If you’re young, healthy & can afford shovels, then don't worry.
I trust my skin to keep me warm. I'm young, healthy and I take vitamins. You won't catch me wearing a coat like some sheep. I trust my natural insulation.
To protect the teachers going back to classrooms, the Minister of Education is pleased to announce PPE of 2/5 of a set of snow tires when they arrive at work.
p.s.
Places went from green grass to a whiteout with a foot or more of snow on what would have been Betty White's birthday.
Weather news has started forecasting snow storms by the number of bags of chips (crisps) & hot chocolates required.
Other snow fall ratings are by breed of dog. As in, snow depth vs height of dog you're trying to take for walkies.
4.669
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That's one word I regret googling during breakfast.
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
.
, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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Canoe
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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Mon Jan 17, 2022 7:45 am

A professor who's anti-vax:
  • Caught "fairly severe" covid, recovered.
  • He decided he had "natural immunity" and didn't need the vaccine.
  • Then with his "natural immunity":
    - He proceeded to get infected with covid at least twice more - that he says
    - His tweet history suggests four more infections of covid
    - He says his brain feels fine, only he lost his sense of smell. Says he may never get it back 100 %.
    - Through that, he didn't get vaccinated, despite multiple infections and incurring damage.
  • Conflict: still anti-vax and says he doesn't need the vaccine. Yet says the vaccine helped him with his Omicron infection... Not adding up. Did he get the vaccine or did others getting the vaccine help him. Maybe he's suffering some Long Covid brain fog too...
(Claimed it is reported (not verified): Some evidence suggesting that loss of smell is due to infection of sustentacular cells that provide nutrition/support to the olfactory bulb neurons - therefore not sufficient to indicate CNS (central nervous system) damage.
Most studies show loss of smell as a cognitive defect, indicating CNS damage.
)
4.669
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That's one word I regret googling during breakfast.
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
.
, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by lucky420 » Mon Jan 17, 2022 12:19 pm

I lost sense of taste smell for a short bit.

. It was an odd sensation, especially the taste part. I could feel the coldness of ice cream but not taste it.

I could rip dabs like no other though. I smoke a lot of wax concentrate and it usually makes me cough, it can be harsh and I have wimpy lungs 😬. But not with Covid, I could take big ol hits and blow out large beautiful plumes upon exhaling. :mrgreen:

My symptoms were headaches, fatigue and huge yelling sneezes :coffee:
Oh my god, it's HUGE!

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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Tue Jan 18, 2022 8:39 am

The British jihadist who carried out a terror attack at at synagogue in Texas was granted entry to the US despite having a string of criminal convictions.
  • Despite a series of “red flag warnings” about his behaviour, the jihadist – who has served three prison sentences – was granted a tourist visa after simply lying on his application
  • After arriving at JFK Airport between Christmas and New Year, Akram informed US immigration that he would be staying at a hotel in Queen's Boulevard. No record of him checking in to a hotel in the area has been found and it is thought the address may have even been a reference to 1988 comedy film, Coming To America, which is set in Queen’s Boulevard.
  • He was able to travel from New York to Texas, where he bought a firearm and took three men hostage at a local synagogue
    Akram then travelled from New York to Texas by coach, checking in to a homeless shelter in Dallas on arrival. He spent around two weeks at the centre, during which time it is understood he illegally purchased a firearm from someone off the street.
  • As well as having a lengthy criminal record, Akram was a regular visitor to Pakistan and was understood to be a member of Tablighi Jamaat, an Islamic organisation banned by Saudi Arabia.
  • Intelligence sources refused to confirm a report on Monday night that he had been on a terror watchlist
  • Akram’s brother, Gulbar, said he had suffered from mental health problems and questioned how he had been allowed into the United States. He said: “He’s known to police. Got a criminal record. How was he allowed to get a visa and acquire a gun?”
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2022/0 ... e-address/
4.669
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That's one word I regret googling during breakfast.
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
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, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Thu Jan 20, 2022 7:47 am

"I refuse to answer on the ground it may tend to incriminate me."
-- Erik Trump, over 500 times in a deposition
"You see the mob take the Fifth. If you're innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?"
-- Donald Trump
4.669
.
That's one word I regret googling during breakfast.
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
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, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by some seeing eye » Thu Jan 20, 2022 9:22 am

increasing the signal to noise ratio with compassion

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Canoe
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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Thu Jan 20, 2022 8:19 pm

A Danish “biotech” company in which Novak Djokovic holds a majority stake is working on a “frequency” treatment for Covid-19 that an expert says bears similarities to the principles of homeopathy.

Saunders said in his opinion it was “a stretch” for QuantBioRes to call itself a biotech company. “The ‘innovative technology’ they describe on their website does not reflect contemporary understanding of how biochemistry works,” Saunders said. “If any athletes or other potential investors would like advice on not blowing their cash on this stuff, my fees are reasonable.”

“Of course we are not putting our data on our website for every idiot to look at. We will soon publish an article in a scientific journal that will collect all our clinical testing.”

https://www.theguardian.com/business/20 ... homeopathy

I wonder if under the company investment disclosure "risks" they list "deployment of 5G"?
4.669
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That's one word I regret googling during breakfast.
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
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, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Sat Jan 22, 2022 12:22 am

Shell facility in Alberta is emitting more greenhouse gases than it’s capturing
Shell’s Quest carbon capture and storage facility captured 5 million tonnes of carbon dioxide from the hydrogen produced at its Scotford complex between 2015 and 2019. Scotford refines oil from the Alberta tar sands. But a new report from human rights organization Global Witness found the hydrogen plant emitted 7.5 million tonnes of greenhouse gases in the same timeframe—including methane, which has 80 times the warming power of carbon during its first 20 years in the atmosphere, and accounts for about a quarter of man-made warming today.

To put that in perspective, the “climate-forward” part of the Scotford plant alone has the same carbon footprint per year as 1.2 million fuel-powered cars, Global Witness said.

https://www.vice.com/en/article/7kb43x/ ... nt-alberta
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That's one word I regret googling during breakfast.
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Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
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, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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Re: Can't make this shit up!

Post by Canoe » Mon Jan 24, 2022 4:04 pm

'I'M NOT AN EEJIT' I brought my uncle to the post office to collect his pension – I didn’t realise he was dead

... by linking arms with him and dragging him there. He said: “So we linked him from here to there. He was walking like normal and then I reckon he died. This is no word of a lie, he started dragging his heels from you see the yellow sign that’s there? But we didn’t even think of it as anything. We were grand like then all of a sudden he started going all slumpy."

https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/17421566/ ... e-pension/
4.669
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That's one word I regret googling during breakfast.
.
Video games are giving kids unrealistic expectations on how many swords they can carry.
.
, but don't harm the red dragon that frequents the area from time to time. He and I have an agreement.

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