Confessions.

Donita · Post by **Donita** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 2:42 pm

Why do you think she has such a big smile??

GuinivereElise · Post by **GuinivereElise** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 2:43 pm

GuinivereElise wrote:no stuart: the one that I burned out is a couple of years old... most of the batt-op ones aren't meant to last as long, really.

that, and a lotta use, and, well, it happens.

Donita: lots of batteries. Yes.

I confess that I just changed batteries on one of mine, and it suprised the fuck out of me...

GuinivereElise · Post by **GuinivereElise** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 2:44 pm

Rian Jackson wrote:i confess that i accidentally just imagined donita's monkey playing with toys.

does this mean that Brad's not satisfying???

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 2:46 pm

stuart wrote:I confess that from all the talk around here regarding toys that I can only come to the conclusion that this shit is cheeply made. If I had some power tool that burnt out so easily I would be bent.

Actually, the word from Good Vibrations http://www.goodvibes.com is that many companies rely on the embarrasment factor of making goods cheaply and people just aint gonna complain because it all nasty per-ver-ted stuff anyway. GV does have a 30day guarentee that I've never had to use. The japanese stuff is better because of the lack of hang ups. Otherwise, the dyke owned small businesses are also a good place to buy your silicone dicks from. Those cheesey porn palaces tend to have cheaper, less reliable goods. Remember, many of these are sold as "novelties," not actual tools.

Oh the sheer poofiness of living in a sex negative culture. . .

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 2:47 pm

GuinivereElise wrote:
Rian Jackson wrote:i confess that i accidentally just imagined donita's monkey playing with toys.

does this mean that Brad's not satisfying???

He's a movie star and doesn't want to muss his hair. Need I say more?

Donita · Post by **Donita** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 2:48 pm

GuinivereElise wrote: does this mean that Brad's not satisfying???

Nope....and too small. Mr. Peepers is a maniac in the sack and hung like a fucking gorilla.

GuinivereElise · Post by **GuinivereElise** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 2:50 pm

toys in babeland has the same 30-day... and the good vibes (wahl, hitachi) come with their own year-long warrantees....

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 2:54 pm

Well, Hitachi's Japanese and wahl is a "massager". IT's those little battery operated phallic ones (that don't have a hard enough throb anyway) that are teh real culprits.

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 2:54 pm

I'm gonna have to take my sawzall and rig something up for you guys cuz I have beet the shit out of that thing for years and it shows no sign of quitting.

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 3:00 pm

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 3:11 pm

Stuart
You figure out a way to go into production and you could make a decent living--and a whole lot of women (and men) happy. That's a right livelihood to be proud of.

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 3:19 pm

Stuart, I would have to go with impact hammer... compressed air works so much better, IMO. Plus you have the benefit of a cooling, lubricated, breeze blowing in the work area at all times...

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 3:21 pm

seem someone beat me to it

http://www.fuckingmachines.com

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 3:34 pm

so are ya really going to make us toys?

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 3:45 pm

much fun as it sounds...

Lydia Love · Post by **Lydia Love** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 4:10 pm

What the fuck was at seacompression? Were those belt sanders with the belt off and padding applied?

I'd like one of those - except they weren't exactly discrete.

One of these days I'm shelling out the cash for a hitachi magic wand. I want something with a little freaking power.

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 4:13 pm

Lydia Love wrote:What the fuck was at seacompression? Were those belt sanders with the belt off and padding applied?

I'd like one of those - except they weren't exactly discrete.

One of these days I'm shelling out the cash for a hitachi magic wand. I want something with a little freaking power.

Those were 'fat reducers' from about fifty to seventy-five years ago. I hadn't seen one of those in ages. In theory, they rubbed your fat off. In fact, they just got you off....

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 4:17 pm

samtzu wrote:
Lydia Love wrote:What the fuck was at seacompression? Were those belt sanders with the belt off and padding applied?

I'd like one of those - except they weren't exactly discrete.

One of these days I'm shelling out the cash for a hitachi magic wand. I want something with a little freaking power.
Those were 'fat reducers' from about fifty to seventy-five years ago. I hadn't seen one of those in ages. In theory, they rubbed your fat off. In fact, they just got you off....

Interesting. Way back when vibes were, well not sold, precisely, but you--as a hysterical woman--were supposed to go to your doc regularly for treatment because it calmed you down. This is what vibes were originally sold for (one of the first five electric applainces.) When the price came down, they were available for home use, but still considered a theraputic divise until the 1920s when they started showing up in riske movies and people realized what was actually going on.

GuinivereElise · Post by **GuinivereElise** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 4:21 pm

True Fishy. There's a faboo book on the subject, called

THE TECHNOLOGY OF ORGASM.

They were first invented because the (male) doctors didn't like how long it took to do it manually...

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 4:23 pm

Ah, we have the same sources. Does BiT have old models on display. I swear, the wahl is a varient from a basic that goes back to the 30s or so. . .

GuinivereElise · Post by **GuinivereElise** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 4:27 pm

I simply ADORE that book. It's one of my favorite read-on-the-bus books, actually.

others include: Cunt, (both editions), The Joy of Self-Loving, Bitch: In Praise of Difficult Women, etc...

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 4:27 pm

stealy dan anyone?

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 4:30 pm

I confess that I just flung some shit in another one of those borg2 threads.

GuinivereElise · Post by **GuinivereElise** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 4:32 pm

I confess that I'm going right over to look at it...

Rob the Wop · Post by **Rob the Wop** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 4:35 pm

Lydia Love wrote:What the fuck was at seacompression? Were those belt sanders with the belt off and padding applied?

I'd like one of those - except they weren't exactly discrete.

One of these days I'm shelling out the cash for a hitachi magic wand. I want something with a little freaking power.

Try hitting the older thrift stores or the bins. Janie's favorite toy was made back in the 30's or 40's and looked kind of like a hair dryer with a rubber pad on it. The fucking thing could probably drive in nails with it's vibrations. Cost her $5 I believe.

Looks similiar to this.

GuinivereElise · Post by **GuinivereElise** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 5:24 pm

Rob the Wop wrote:
Lydia Love wrote:What the fuck was at seacompression? Were those belt sanders with the belt off and padding applied?

I'd like one of those - except they weren't exactly discrete.

One of these days I'm shelling out the cash for a hitachi magic wand. I want something with a little freaking power.
Try hitting the older thrift stores or the bins. Janie's favorite toy was made back in the 30's or 40's and looked kind of like a hair dryer with a rubber pad on it. The fucking thing could probably drive in nails with it's vibrations. Cost her $5 I believe.

Looks similiar to this.

totally... they often have the really funky old contraptions: like the massager that you strap onto your hand that makes your hand vibrate so much you think it's gonna fall off...

Captain Goddammit · Post by **Captain Goddammit** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 7:57 pm

Lydia Love wrote:What the fuck was at seacompression? Were those belt sanders with the belt off and padding applied?

The thing at Seacompression was an orbital sander, not a belt sander.
A goddamm belt sander would NOT feel good.
Fucking EVERYONE has been saying they were using a belt sander on people at Seacomp ('cause they're all computer geeks who wouldn't know a power tool if it was used on them?), hence the raised eyebrows, something a belt sander would have done literally.

Sorry... I just couldn't stand it anymore...

GuinivereElise · Post by **GuinivereElise** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 8:00 pm

samtzu wrote:
Lydia Love wrote:What the fuck was at seacompression? Were those belt sanders with the belt off and padding applied?

I'd like one of those - except they weren't exactly discrete.

One of these days I'm shelling out the cash for a hitachi magic wand. I want something with a little freaking power.
Those were 'fat reducers' from about fifty to seventy-five years ago. I hadn't seen one of those in ages. In theory, they rubbed your fat off. In fact, they just got you off....

Ummm, Capt?? ^^^

Captain Goddammit · Post by **Captain Goddammit** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 8:04 pm

GuinivereElise wrote: Ummm, Capt?? ^^^

Yes, Guin?

(By the way, I was there, saw and handled the device in question that was mistaken for a belt sander...)

GuinivereElise · Post by **GuinivereElise** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 8:06 pm

i was too. just wondering what your take was on sam's explanation of what they were...

it would jibe with all the other old weight equipment there...