Confessions.

Martiansky · Post by **Martiansky** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 8:25 am

OOP, you fill in the blank....ie...
tossed them
gave them away

gigglesnort · Post by **gigglesnort** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 8:27 am

Martiansky wrote:I confess that I have no children and so I'll probabaly take a beating for giving advice where I have no experience at..........But here's my advice:

How about boxing up half the toys and hiding the box somewhere, storage or a friends place. When they come asking where their toys went that you _________ them.
They aren't gone forever then and can be refound.

I confess this is what I did before and what is likely to happen know......the most special toys will get put away in the attic. I'll probably leave a stuffed animal or barbie doll on the bed, too. I'm really just a mediocre ogre (probably why we get to this point in the first place).

RingO'Fire · Post by **RingO'Fire** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 8:39 am

I confess that I've talked to my ex-girlfriend three times in the past week. [We split up about six weeks ago].

Last Saturday, she came by the house (my new house) and hung out with me for about an hour. I confess that I've got a really cool, beautiful old house (built in 1949) and that I've got my house really neat and clean and organized. When she saw how I had everything in the house all dialed in and my new short n' sexy haircut, she said, "Wow! Steve, I'm overwhelmed!" [heh heh heh - that's just the reaction I was shooting for].

We talked a long time; it went really well. I think she's finally realized that she fucked up royally when she let me go and let her dipshit ex- move back in with her when he got out of rehab. Now she wants him gone and says, "I don't know what I'm going to do about him." Like I've said here before, once you've had the best (yours truly, of course), it's hard to go back to second or third best.

The other two times we spoke this week were on the phone. Ooh, check this out. When she came over on Saturday, we watched a Burningman video that DJ Big E gave me during the burn (we were RV-mates). She loved it and was totally enthralled. So, Thursday morning when I turned my phone on, there was a voice mail message from Wednesday night/Thursday morn at 2:00 a.m. "Hey Steve, it's me. Renee [her girlfriend] and I have been out drinking and were on our way home and we wanted to come by your house and wake you up and watch your Burningman video. Oh well, I guess 'another time' perhaps..."

Now, I should mention that my niece will be 16 next week and that my brother has bought her a car, which is going to be a suprise, and that my niece's car is temporarily stashed in my driveway. I should also mention that Wednesday night I went to see Alison Krause & Union Station here in Chattanooga (which was a totally amazing show, BTW). I should also mention that I asked my former girlfriend (let's just call her "Loretta") to the concert when I bought the tickets months ago. When we hung out this past Saturday, I told her that the invitation was still open. She called on Monday and let me know that she wouldn't be able to go to the show. Later, I invited my friend, Lane, who is a really pretty, smart 24-year old and who is also kinda like a little sister, to the show, but Loretta had no idea who I was taking.

So, when I called Lori back yesterday, I told her, "Hey, I'm sorry I missed you guys last night; I wish you had come on over to the house; I'm sure it would have had fun." [and maybe I would have "gotten some"]. Her reply, "Well, actually, we did come over. When I saw the extra car in your driveway though, we figured that you probably had a girl in there, and we didn't know what to do, so we eventually just left."

I confess that I wanted to torment her a little and keep her guessing about the extra car and whether or not I had someone inside with me, but I "let her off the hook" and told her that the car in my driveway was my niece's birthday suprise.

I confess that even though I was really hurt and pissed off about a month ago and had vowed to myself never to call, email, or try to contact her ever again in any way, I really hope things work out between us and that we get back together. [When things were good, they were really good!]

I confess that if we do get back together, I'd kinda like to "make her pay" for jerking me around, but I won't actually do it.

I confess that I am confident that things actually will work out for us, now that she's "seen the light", so to speak.

Finally, I confess that I'd like to hook up with someone for some casual sex, but I don't want to lead anyone on who might be looking for a LTR, while I'm waiting for Loretta to get her shit together.

PurpleKoosh · Post by **PurpleKoosh** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 11:35 am

gigglesnort wrote:I'm really just a mediocre ogre (probably why we get to this point in the first place).

A mediogre? (Sorry, had to be done.)

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 11:43 am

I confess that I find any parental dishonesty to be yucky. But then again, I aint walked a mile in those shoes.

Ranger Genius · Post by **Ranger Genius** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 11:49 am

I have to agree with Stuart. Not that I have experience being a good parent, but I do have experience being raised by a BAD parent, so I think that gives me a little expertise. Don't say you got rid of them, tell the truth: you took them away and will give them back as they EARN them, by showing that they can keep the remaining ones put away. Perhaps a quantified standard and progress chart could be illustrative in the lesson, too...if you're that anal.

All preceding advice should be taken with not one, but three grains of salt.

Martiansky · Post by **Martiansky** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 11:56 am

I confess that you guys are right. Earning them back would be better.

Martiansky · Post by **Martiansky** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 11:58 am

I confess that my "Kids" have 4 legs and fur and when they leave their toys laying around I just pick them up.

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 12:15 pm

when the floor gets out of control at my house i give the kids a one day warning then i box/bag it all up and stash it. they do extra chores to earn the good stuff back, and the rest gets donated.

they usually don't even miss it once it's bagged up. (there are currently 3 bags in my closet that they haven't missed in months - i really need to get rid of that shit)

the trick seems to be to not get personal about it. here's the deal, here's the consequence, follow through. cut and dried. then, too, they know i mean it next time.

and this christmas, i left all the christmas loot in the car until there was a clean room with empty spaces to put the new stuff. they got rid of bags and bags and bags of trash/giveaway stuff to make room for the new!

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 12:20 pm

that's kick ass parenting honey

<smooch>

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 12:25 pm

I threaten "FIRE!" at my house... my 23 year old son never responds, though... maybe I should try "BLUDGEON!"

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 12:28 pm

Sam--based on the freedom you allow woodrow, we're not surprised your son doesnt' obey you either.

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 12:29 pm

stuart wrote:that's kick ass parenting honey

<smooch>

thank you, sweets!

*smooch* you too!

I threaten "FIRE!" at my house... my 23 year old son never responds, though... maybe I should try "BLUDGEON!"

gigglesnort · Post by **gigglesnort** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 12:43 pm

I confess I have two bags of toys, one for the attic and a larger one for goodwill. There are still alot of toys in their rooms, which are almost done including mopping. I confess I handed out spankings in the process.

I confess I constantly struggle with being honest with my children, the same as I struggle in all relationships including with myself, and that I value honesty. It seems I do better at it than some, not so well as others.

It is an indescribable weight, parenthood. We are going for treats now (friday ice cream for them and a coffee drink for me, yay!)

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 12:46 pm

I agree,

thank you so much for your effort to do it well

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 12:46 pm

theCryptofishist wrote:Sam--based on the freedom you allow woodrow, we're not surprised your son doesnt' obey you either.

At least I don't let my son do my thinking for me... maybe that's what gets me into trouble...

gigglesnort · Post by **gigglesnort** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 12:50 pm

I've tried the earning the toys back thing, but they usually forget about what's gone once its out of site. Earning stuff only marginally works in any circumstance with them; maybe it'll change as they get older?

Additionally, we are still working on the basic stuff, keep your space neat and the common space neat. I believe those kinds of things are to be expected adn don't get extra rewards. No one rewards me for washing the dishes. I do let them earn other times by washing windows, baseboards, etc, adn sometimes they go for it.

Silver 2 · Post by **Silver 2** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 12:50 pm

I threaten "FIRE!" at my house... my 23 year old son never responds, though... maybe I should try "BLUDGEON!"

Personally I've got to find or replace the practice nun-chucks, they do get the 17 year old moving.

I confess: The other day Kiddo was wrestling with his GF and she started yelling for help, so when I couldn't find the chucks I poked him with a sword. I did not break the skin, no matter what he says and I have a witness (the GF)..

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 12:55 pm

Silver 2 wrote:
I threaten "FIRE!" at my house... my 23 year old son never responds, though... maybe I should try "BLUDGEON!"
Personally I've got to find or replace the practice nun-chucks, they do get the 17 year old moving.

I confess: The other day Kiddo was wrestling with his GF and she started yelling for help, so when I couldn't find the chucks I poked him with a sword. I did not break the skin, no matter what he says and I have a witness (the GF)..

Actually, my son and I both do the 'chucks, and he's just a little bit faster than me... but I've got the reach... and I take the hits better... hmmmm... yeah, 'chucks...

buckethead alien · Post by **buckethead alien** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 1:14 pm

I confess that for want of a chalice, the wine has almost been spilled

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 1:30 pm

dude, you're 4 times his size, sam.

when i was little, if i didn't clean my shit up, it got piled at the door to my room (after other options were exhuasted). eventually you'd have to clean to get inside.

there were other things that worked better once we were at a chores stage, like'you can't go do anything on saturday until you finish saturday chores.' Then we got to the point of one parent in MN and the other on 12 hour shifts and we were rotating things like dinner-making out of necessity.

i confess that i'm still not very good about cleaning up my toys every day. but i do clean neurotically fairly frequently.

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 1:41 pm

Rian Jackson wrote:dude, you're 4 times his size, sam.

Yeah, but he's quick, sneaky, and doesn't need as much sleep as I do... Why do you think I sleep in a corner in the basement with my back to the wall, and all my swords, knives, etc., all around me?

... I never should have showed him how to stab someone in the kidneys...

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 1:43 pm

i feel like i should clarify... although your son's GF has spoken extensively about the peni (is that the plural?) in your family, i haven't seen your son's. and i've only seen yours outside, just kinda hanging around limply. twice.

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 1:52 pm

buckethead alien wrote:I confess that for want of a chalice, the wine has almost been spilled

i confess i really want to know what the hell this means...

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 1:59 pm

Rian Jackson wrote:i feel like i should clarify... although your son's GF has spoken extensively about the peni (is that the plural?) in your family, i haven't seen your son's. and i've only seen yours outside, just kinda hanging around limply. twice.

...he does get bigger when he's happy...

Simply Joel · Post by **Simply Joel** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 2:00 pm

tisha2 wrote:
buckethead alien wrote:I confess that for want of a chalice, the wine has almost been spilled
i confess i really want to know what the hell this means...

for want of a container, i almost spilled the wine.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 2:01 pm

I confess that I lied (bald-faced even) on another thread.

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 2:02 pm

thanks, joel.

again, really. for the second time today, thank you. the clarity is just.... wow. thank you.

gigglesnort · Post by **gigglesnort** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 2:04 pm

Rian Jackson wrote:....i confess that i'm still not very good about cleaning up my toys every day. but i do clean neurotically fairly frequently.

I resemble this remark. This could also explain why we end up at this point. Today is neurotic cleaning day (poor children).

I confess I try to make clear to them that their mother is nuts, an imperfect human being, and just trying her best which varies from day to day, same as they.

Sandwichman · Post by **Sandwichman** » Fri Jan 14, 2005 2:10 pm

samtzu wrote:
Rian Jackson wrote:i feel like i should clarify... although your son's GF has spoken extensively about the peni (is that the plural?) in your family, i haven't seen your son's. and i've only seen yours outside, just kinda hanging around limply. twice.

...he does get bigger when he's happy...

I thought he only came out to play when he is happy. I guess the people at Decom truly have seen your best

Oh and on another note Sam. Pinky and Rich that were at that Lake Oswego house party will be hosting an event on the 29th so keep your calendar open and be prepared to saturate your liver with many variations of alcohol.

Jason