Stupid Work Annoyances

Ranger Genius · Post by **Ranger Genius** » Tue Jan 18, 2005 11:54 am

Didn't you get that memo, asshole?

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Tue Jan 18, 2005 12:17 pm

It just dawned on me that I have a "Sell Before" date around here of Jan. 31st.

aforceforgood · Post by **aforceforgood** » Tue Jan 18, 2005 5:04 pm

"Executive" fucktards who are NEVER wrong that will calmly and with a straight face (although I can tell that they know they're full of shit and are just having their little power moment) condescendingly explaining to you that I should "just know" by using common sense that the words "expected on" on the computer screen don't actually mean we expect the shipment to actually arrive on that date, that that's the date they were ordered.

No, wait, it's the date we pay for the shipment.

Or maybe it's just automatically 7 days out from when we ordered it.

Are we done here? Because I have the urge to either throttle someone or jump up on their desk and crap on their keyboard so they can't spread more confusion, and I don't think either one of us wants that unpleasantness...

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Tue Jan 18, 2005 5:20 pm

It sounds like we work in the same office, Force... do they breed these people out there?

Sensei · Post by **Sensei** » Tue Jan 18, 2005 5:30 pm

We run six (6) systems simultaneously. Two (2) of them are 'production' systems, while the rest are 'test' systems. I watched a systems programmer (major dinero) waltz in here last week and enter a command that brought down one of the 'production' systems - and basically the entire nationwide network. Seems he thought he was on a test system. Oops. That's a no-no!

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Tue Jan 18, 2005 5:47 pm

That's why he makes the big bucks....

geekster · Post by **geekster** » Tue Jan 18, 2005 8:18 pm

hmm, when you first mentioned two production systems I assumed that your production environment was somehow redundant. That one system failing could take the entire network with it would mean an architect someplace should be tiewrapped naked to a chain-link fence and have Windows CD's thrown at them until they bleed to death.

If our production environment melted for lack of a single system (or even one entire site) I would be called to a meeting and told to bring a box with me.

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 11:04 am

Wedenesday rant No. 1:

This isn't *about* work, per se, but as it pertains to getting to work, i think this place will do for it.

So I'm walking downtown, dreaming of the dirty soy chai and bagel awaiting me, dodging raindrops. All of a sudden my feet go flying. The back of my head hurts, anticipating the smack on the sidewalk it could soon receive. In slow motion I dance through the air, somehow regaining my footing.

I was walking on the fucking sidewalk. Every time these sidewalks get at all wet, they're almost impassable unless you're wearing hiking boots. I know this is an outdoorsy city, but Jesus. It was at least a decade ago that it was fine to attend the average wedding in gortex. If you were making a sidewalk in a city where it rains for 9 months straight, don't you think you'd give them a little bit of traction??

Fuckers. No surprise it's right across from Nike Town.

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 11:07 am

i love you little sis, but just about shit myself laughing imagining that momentary off-balance dance and the cute little startled look of WTF!? on yer face afterwards!!!

i'm so glad yer okay...!

my work annoyance today is that there is nothing exciting for me to do...just mindless data entry bullshit... * sigh *

Force · Post by **Force** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 11:09 am

geekster, if you're working for a company that professional, you're missing out on big bucks.

The company I work for has paid over a million bucks to a software company to develop a replacement for their 20-year old software.

The software guy just happens to be freinds with the daughter of the owner...

I'm sure you can do the math on that one.

There's gotta be a lotta clueless companies like this out there just waiting to be fleeced- if you have moral reservations, hey, I've done what I can, it's up to you now...

I narrowly averted us having to use the beta replacement GUI version by asking a couple of questions of the guy showing us how to install it...

Me; "So how do we resize the window?"

Programmer guy; "Uh, well, it doesn't do that."

Stunned silence.

Me; "Ooooooookay... um, how do we make the program show the shortcut keys?"

Programmer guy; "Um, well, it doesn't do that either, but we'll try to get you guys some keyboard overlays..." Right. We'll see those about 2017...

Me; "So this is a beta version then?"

Programmer guy; "No, this is an alpha."

More stunned silence.

Me; "Isn't this GUI going to be slower than the old version?"

Programmer guy; "Well, yes."

Me; "Then why are we switching over to this?"

Programmer guy; "Well, this one does a lot more than the old one."

Me; "Oh, cool, will this one show me inventory and pricing without me having to go through 8 different screens?"

Programmer guy; "Uh, well, no, it's structured the same as the old one so you don't have to relearn the architecture... but this one allows you to make notes on the customer's account."

Me; "We can do that now."

Programmer guy; "Oh. Well, I've gotta go, did you have any more questions?"

Me; "Yeah, how much are you willing to bribe me to not tell my boss that you're foisting a huge steaming pile of crap onto us in response no doubt to pressure to deliver the program you're overdue on?"

Actually, that last I kept to myself...

Force · Post by **Force** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 11:12 am

Rian, sounds like time for a lawsuit or at least a call to city hall.

Problem with a lawsuit is it gets you involved with lawyers and the courts, the advantage of city hall is there's a slim possibility of getting that sidewalk changed before someone gets seriously hurt.

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 11:23 am

so, worked really hard last week to make a deadline. Drove the media over to the mock-up today to find an empty husk where a set was supposed to be and no projectors for media to play on. Hurry up and wait.

however, I realize it is nearly impossible for the show producer to get multiple disciplines in multiple departments to all land at the same moment

geekster · Post by **geekster** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 11:23 am

The key to successful lawsuits is to sue for just a little less than the average lawyer's retainer for such a case. Let's say lawyers in your area want $50K ... you sue for $40K. The company can choose to spend $50K to save $40K or just pay you off (settle). Always sue for less than it costs to say no. If it is cheaper to say yes, they will. They will hate it, but generally they will pay it. THAT is why our system sucks.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 11:30 am

samtzu wrote:It sounds like we work in the same office, Force... do they breed these people out there?

Top secret GMO project--headed by the Hoover Institute.

Force · Post by **Force** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 11:53 am

samtzu wrote:It sounds like we work in the same office, Force... do they breed these people out there?

Unfortunately, it's not a breeding thing, it's more of a training thing- our society trains these jackasses that in lieu of real talent or professionalism, ass-kissing will suffice.

It also helps that she lacks a penis- there are NO men at the executive level in this company.

Moral; NEVER join a company run by women unless you're prepared to bear the brunt of all the anger and resentment that women have towards men for years of oppression, discrimination and/or not desiring them despite the fact that they may be hundreds of pounds overweight, abrasive, obnoxious, stupid, etc.

There's no amount of money that's worth it.

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 12:15 pm

wow....that's, ummm.... general.

geekster · Post by **geekster** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 12:28 pm

I know someone that can fix them right up! Get this guy into your next project meeting.

http://www.ouchytheclown.com/meet.shtml

Or if you just want to give one a little birthday present ...

http://www.ouchytheclown.com/prodom.shtml

Oh, and he is a burner too.

GuinivereElise · Post by **GuinivereElise** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 12:31 pm

Force wrote:
samtzu wrote:It sounds like we work in the same office, Force... do they breed these people out there?
Unfortunately, it's not a breeding thing, it's more of a training thing- our society trains these jackasses that in lieu of real talent or professionalism, ass-kissing will suffice.

It also helps that she lacks a penis- there are NO men at the executive level in this company.

Moral; NEVER join a company run by women unless you're prepared to bear the brunt of all the anger and resentment that women have towards men for years of oppression, discrimination and/or not desiring them despite the fact that they may be hundreds of pounds overweight, abrasive, obnoxious, stupid, etc.

There's no amount of money that's worth it.

and a hefty fuckoff to you too...

geekster · Post by **geekster** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 12:32 pm

I agree GE ... it was uncalled for. The guy needs a little dose of humor to cheer him up. Sounds pretty bitter to me.

GuinivereElise · Post by **GuinivereElise** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 12:33 pm

(thanks geekie)

Force · Post by **Force** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 12:43 pm

GuinivereElise wrote:
Force wrote:
samtzu wrote:It sounds like we work in the same office, Force... do they breed these people out there?
Unfortunately, it's not a breeding thing, it's more of a training thing- our society trains these jackasses that in lieu of real talent or professionalism, ass-kissing will suffice.

It also helps that she lacks a penis- there are NO men at the executive level in this company.

Moral; NEVER join a company run by women unless you're prepared to bear the brunt of all the anger and resentment that women have towards men for years of oppression, discrimination and/or not desiring them despite the fact that they may be hundreds of pounds overweight, abrasive, obnoxious, stupid, etc.

There's no amount of money that's worth it.
and a hefty fuckoff to you too...

So you're saying that women are above reproach and could never act this way GE?

Sorry, but unfortunately they're human too.

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 12:45 pm

i think we all agree that we all have moments of imperfection as humans, however your post implies that ALL women who run companies are fat, ugly, abrasive, stupid man-haters.

a wee bit over the top...

geekster · Post by **geekster** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 12:45 pm

I had an experiance once where I felt excluded and discriminated against by the management and core employees. Seems a company I worked with in Virginia was founded by people from the same fundamentalist church. The original core employees were also recuited from the congregation. They all knew each other, socialized together, and a lot of policy regarding company direction and stuff was done offline in the course of their "christian fellowship" meetings. Their church congregation was even kept aprised of company progress and they were always pitching the company to church members looking for employees.

At some point the company became "real" as it moved (literally) from the founders shed to a business condo in an office park. At that point they had to hire "outsiders" and boy were you aware that you were an outsider! Their church was constantly being pitched to you, flyers of church gatherings would appear in your mailbox, people that joined the church were publically praised on the company PA or in meetings. If you refused to join, you were excluded from a lot of the discussions and planning. People would come to work Monday morning and a new direction would be presented ... "We are going to do this ..." and you would ask when that was decided because you could see some flaws in the logic and some things needed to be modified slightly and the answer would always be "Sunday night Fellowship".

Eventually the company decided to shrink because of competition in the market and as outsiders were the first ones let go, they would walk around and let everyone know they had been "excommunicated". It really sucked. I stayed on, though, because I used to travel a lot with them and though I was not paid overtime, I did get paid straight time for travel from the time I left my house to the time I arrived at my hotel so I was pulling in good money for a single 25-year old.

GuinivereElise · Post by **GuinivereElise** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 12:47 pm

I'm saying that you shouldn't categorize all women into one man-hater stereotype. period.

or, if that's the case, then all men are cheuvanistic pigs who are jealous of the fact that women can bring another human into the world, especially if they're fat and stupid and drink too much beer.

I'm saying that your broad sweeping generalization is offensive, in the least. It shows a lack of intelligence and critical thinking on your part.

If we're all human, try being one and giving an entire sex a bit of a break.

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 12:48 pm

force, the point is that although as humans we can all be asshats of various types, there is no call to say that all people of one gender or another act in one way. in fact, that's a perfect example of being an asshat.

more to the point, please see Sensei's comment on the confessions thread from yesterday.

i can't believe i just justified this with a response....

helitack · Post by **helitack** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 12:50 pm

Force wrote:
samtzu wrote:It sounds like we work in the same office, Force... do they breed these people out there?
Unfortunately, it's not a breeding thing, it's more of a training thing- our society trains these jackasses that in lieu of real talent or professionalism, ass-kissing will suffice.

It also helps that she lacks a penis- there are NO men at the executive level in this company.

Moral; NEVER join a company run by women unless you're prepared to bear the brunt of all the anger and resentment that women have towards men for years of oppression, discrimination and/or not desiring them despite the fact that they may be hundreds of pounds overweight, abrasive, obnoxious, stupid, etc.

There's no amount of money that's worth it.

i personally love women, whether they are the bosses or not. They accept me for all my flaws, they are awesome.

Force · Post by **Force** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 1:03 pm

Ok, true, I should have worded it better, didn't mean to imply that all women are like that, obviously that's stupid.

I have worked in a number of different offices where the women vastly outnumber the men, and I've seen the same behavior over and over again, to a greater or lesser extent.

And I have women freinds who confirm that yes, women can be like this, in fact, one said "I wouldn't give you 5 cents for a woman's freindship."

This is not to say that men also don't engage in behavior just as bad or worse. Again, you need to parse the meaning out and not jump immediately on someone who points out that women do this, because it's real, and it's making my life fucking miserable, to the point where I've come home so angry that I wasn't in the mood to make love to my wife.

This company just happens to be the worst offender I've come across yet, and so I worded my warning to other men a bit stronger than I guess I should have.

I kind of assumed people are smart enough to read between the lines and understand I'm not saying all women are 100% carbon copies of each other.

I am a bit bitter about having to put up with their stupid crap every fucking day, but the payoff at the end of the discrimination lawsuit should be worth it. That's how bad it is here.

And I hope to have another job by next week, so life will get better.

Sorry if I offended you, I assumed that no one guilty of that behavior would relate it to themselves.

DVD Burner · Post by **DVD Burner** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 1:06 pm

Most times I'm glad I dont work for anyone.

Force · Post by **Force** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 1:10 pm

Sorry if I offended you, I assumed that no one guilty of that behavior would relate it to themselves.

Whoops, where's that danged edit button, meant to say; Sorry if I offended you, I assumed that no one who is not guilty of that behavior would relate it to themselves.

bullD · Post by **bullD** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 1:11 pm

geekster wrote:The key to successful lawsuits is to sue for just a little less than the average lawyer's retainer for such a case. Let's say lawyers in your area want $50K ... you sue for $40K. The company can choose to spend $50K to save $40K or just pay you off (settle). Always sue for less than it costs to say no. If it is cheaper to say yes, they will. They will hate it, but generally they will pay it. THAT is why our system sucks.

Spoken like a true Californian...