Sheep don't have a chance. . .

BlueBirdPoof · Post by **BlueBirdPoof** » Mon Dec 13, 2004 12:35 pm

Against the Trollalition.

Despite the heroic overtime put in by the Ovine Auntie Defemation League, any troll who signs on to eplaya feels the need to badmouth sheep. They classically open up a thread complaining about some aspect of the event, or it's founder, or the attendents, or the color of the sky and then they throw in the sheep remark. These lazy thinkers need a new metaphor or two. Have any of them actually worked with sheep or is it just a rote recitation of their supposed charicteristics? I am beginning to think that all these communiques come directly from Troll Central, which is funded by the "Beef, it's What's for Dinner" folk in a 21 century update of the old west range wars.

I would caution the trolls to think about the phrase "Wild and Wooley," and to remember that eplayans can be very wild indeed.

>Chirp!<

Bob · Post by **Bob** » Mon Dec 13, 2004 2:37 pm

I'm a fragile lambkin and my psyche hurts.

BlueBirdPoof · Post by **BlueBirdPoof** » Mon Dec 13, 2004 2:42 pm

There, there, my soft fuzzy thematic one.

lothos 1162 · Post by **lothos 1162** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 5:34 am

sheep,are they wet sheep?do they have much wool?what are the ages of these sheep?where do they come from?who is the sheep herder?I am in possession of a fish costume and tube of KY,here I come!Lothos

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 7:11 am

This is the very reason that inflatable sheep were invented. The sheep can then be safely stored in a bottom drawer until the time comes that you need one (or a whole flock).... this was discovered by sheep herders in Northern Nevada about sixty years ago, who knew a good thing when they saw one. That is why, to this day, around Battle Mountain and Winnemucca you can see in the distance, herds of inflatable sheep floating along the hillsides....

... at least, I do... I think they're sheep...

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 11:56 am

Inflatable sheep are also a good repository of hot air.

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 1:22 pm

theCryptofishist wrote:Inflatable sheep are also a good repository of hot air.

Don't say that... if the sheep realize that, they'll all sign on to Borg2 and run for office... They have all the qualifications: essentially empty, easily blown about by the winds of change, bereft of substance...

... ooooooh... that was bitchy, wasn't it?.....

geekster · Post by **geekster** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 1:40 pm

Plinking inflatable sheep is one of my favorite hobbies. If you get them right through the hip they go flying off foward with this cool "fishtailing" action that looks oh so neat.

unjonharley · Post by **unjonharley** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 6:30 pm

lothos 1162 wrote:sheep,are they wet sheep?do they have much wool?what are the ages of these sheep?where do they come from?who is the sheep herder?I am in possession of a fish costume and tube of KY,here I come!Lothos

_
I know a lambaphile when i see one.

SIEKK · Post by **SIEKK** » Sat Jan 22, 2005 7:45 am

..Speaking of sheep, this has been on my mind for a while. I could just ask a local farmer but I just never think of it at the right time.

1. If washing wool causes it to shrink, what affect does this have on sheep in the rain? I suppose maybe there's a temperature correlation or maybe only processed wool is affected, I don't know. Anyone care to enlighten me? :?

unjonharley · Post by **unjonharley** » Sat Jan 22, 2005 7:57 am

unjonharley · Post by **unjonharley** » Sat Jan 22, 2005 8:12 am

Know what a burner standing on a playa corner in BRC with two leashed sheep is called?
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pimp

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Mon Jan 24, 2005 9:15 am

SIEKK wrote:..Speaking of sheep, this has been on my mind for a while. I could just ask a local farmer but I just never think of it at the right time.

1. If washing wool causes it to shrink, what affect does this have on sheep in the rain? I suppose maybe there's a temperature correlation or maybe only processed wool is affected, I don't know. Anyone care to enlighten me? :?

From what I understand of "felting" wool it's repeated washing with soap in hot water and using the dryer. From the one time I tried to make felt beads--it was a lot of work. I forgot exactly how the yurt felt is made, but I have a vague memory of sticking it in the ford and having the horses trample it. Also, there is "spinning" which involved compining multiple fibers into yarn. Remember, sheeps wool has plenty of oil (aka lanolin) which gives it some waterproofing, is individual fibers--not joined, doesn't get agitated by a washing machine or horses hooves in the rain, and usually deals with cold water when rained on, not multiple hot washing. I realize this is not a complete answer, but it's good enough for me.

Here's some links
http://www.bountifulspinweave.com/how_t ... ctions.htm

Wait! this link sez that if sheep were not sheared they would grow felt. I guess that's domestication for you. Kinda a rasta thing, perhaps.

http://gfwsheep.com/felting/felt.html

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Mon Jan 24, 2005 9:16 am

SIEKK wrote:..Speaking of sheep, this has been on my mind for a while. I could just ask a local farmer but I just never think of it at the right time.

1. If washing wool causes it to shrink, what affect does this have on sheep in the rain? I suppose maybe there's a temperature correlation or maybe only processed wool is affected, I don't know. Anyone care to enlighten me? :?

should i even bother guessing that lanolin has something to do with it?

sheep are greasy mutha fuckas.

some call it lube...

Rob the Wop · Post by **Rob the Wop** » Mon Jan 24, 2005 12:21 pm

Sheep are covered in lanolin?
No wonder my penis is so soft and silky smooth.
I mean, uhm, that's an interesting fact.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Mon Jan 24, 2005 3:54 pm

Rob the Wop
Haven't you noticed how slippery they are, even when you're grabbing onto the wool with both hands?

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Mon Jan 24, 2005 4:00 pm

velcro.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Mon Jan 24, 2005 4:22 pm

Rob the Wop's hands are made of velcro? Wow, he must give some very shiatsu massages.

Or does he just wear velcrogloves for sheepbuggery? What does he wear for cow tipping? I'm imagining a little sequined number.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Jan 25, 2005 2:28 pm

Thank you ~ this discussion just made my day!

Conjures up some wicked images. How can I tell my s.o. to try sheep lanolin?

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Tue Jan 25, 2005 2:33 pm

theCryptofishist wrote:Rob the Wop's hands are made of velcro? Wow, he must give some very shiatsu massages.

Or does he just wear velcrogloves for sheepbuggery? What does he wear for cow tipping? I'm imagining a little sequined number.

cupid outfit, i suppose. it confuses the cows long enough to get in a good shove and spirit oneself away...

SHEEPMAN · Post by **SHEEPMAN** » Tue Jan 25, 2005 11:00 pm

SHEEPMAN WILL PROTECT ALL THE KIDS OF THE PLAYA. THE HERO OF THE PLAYA WILL NOT LET THE FLOCK DOWN. LOOK OUT EVIL RANDY!
PEACE TO THE FLEECE![/b]

SHEEPMAN · Post by **SHEEPMAN** » Tue Jan 25, 2005 11:01 pm

SHEEPMAN WILL PROTECT ALL THE KIDS OF THE PLAYA. THE HERO OF THE PLAYA WILL NOT LET THE FLOCK DOWN. LOOK OUT EVIL RANDY!
PEACE TO THE FLEECE![/b]

lothos 1162 · Post by **lothos 1162** » Wed Jan 26, 2005 5:50 am

your sheep ARE MINE!,and if they won'/don't come peacefully,I have "roofies",you keep the kids.Lothos has spoken

lothos 1162 · Post by **lothos 1162** » Wed Jan 26, 2005 5:51 am

Second thought I will have a Piece of the Fleece.Lothos

SHEEPMAN · Post by **SHEEPMAN** » Wed Jan 26, 2005 10:47 pm

THE HEROES OF THE PLAYA ARE ALWAYS READY TO KEEP THE PEACE, NOW PAS THE PIPE!

dougaldutch · Post by **dougaldutch** » Thu Jan 27, 2005 4:43 am

Sheep don't stand a chance if you hone your skills with this website

http://www.sheepcull.co.uk

Remember never leave any witnesses, not that they witnessed anything mind you, no I was just strolling through this field in my extra large wellies and velcro G-string cause I enjoy nature

DougalD

RingO'Fire · Post by **RingO'Fire** » Thu Jan 27, 2005 6:05 am

dougaldutch wrote:Sheep don't stand a chance if you hone your skills with this website

http://www.sheepcull.co.uk

Remember never leave any witnesses, not that they witnessed anything mind you, no I was just strolling through this field in my extra large wellies and velcro G-string cause I enjoy nature

DougalD

Awesome fuckin' website DougalD!

I killed 39 sheep with 50 bullets in 61 seconds! That's a 78% "kill ratio", not too bad for my first try. Just aim for the large groups of sheep, or catch the ones bobbing up and down at the top of their arc. Totally hilarious.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Thu Jan 27, 2005 12:58 pm

RingO'Fire wrote:
dougaldutch wrote:Sheep don't stand a chance if you hone your skills with this website

http://www.sheepcull.co.uk

Remember never leave any witnesses, not that they witnessed anything mind you, no I was just strolling through this field in my extra large wellies and velcro G-string cause I enjoy nature

DougalD
Awesome fuckin' website DougalD!

I killed 39 sheep with 50 bullets in 61 seconds! That's a 78% "kill ratio", not too bad for my first try. Just aim for the large groups of sheep, or catch the ones bobbing up and down at the top of their arc. Totally hilarious.

43 I had to put down my lunch at the beginning and answer a phonecall in the middle. 355 seconds.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Thu Jan 27, 2005 1:14 pm

49 in 113

Ranger Genius · Post by **Ranger Genius** » Thu Jan 27, 2005 1:52 pm

46 in 53. Pa-POW!

Sheep don't have a chance. . .

Sheep don't have a chance. . .

Oh my!

SHEEP

SHEEP