schmegma!

diem · Post by **diem** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 1:55 pm

dammit I hate my job. Pass the absinthe.

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 2:03 pm

friends are snipping their newborn boy this weekend. I guess no more schmegma.

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 2:09 pm

stuart wrote:friends are snipping their newborn boy this weekend. I guess no more schmegma.

my friend sings a song about his penis and about being snipped.

it's very odd to sit there and be forced to think about his dick.

last time i heard him perform his girlfriend was there. she looked at me and made some comment about what a 'nice one' he had, and then became incredibly embarrassed.

Simply Joel · Post by **Simply Joel** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 2:10 pm

this is an example of why i use a dictionary so much...
correct spelling does count. IMHO

smeg·ma
Pronunciation: 'smeg-m&
Function: noun
Etymology: New Latin, from Latin, detergent, soap, from Greek smEgma, from smEchein to wash off, clean
Date: circa 1819
: the secretion of a sebaceous gland; specifically : the cheesy sebaceous matter that collects between the glans penis and the foreskin or around the clitoris and labia minora

or
www.urbandictionary.com

schmegma
sticky substance formed in the uncircumcised skin of the penis due to poor hygine.

schmegma
The smelly funny tasting stuff on my boyfriends weenier

Schmegma
An unidentified, often gross looking substance on door handles, refrigerators, phones, people etc. Schmegma can be found just about anywhere.

diem · Post by **diem** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 2:12 pm

stuart wrote:friends are snipping their newborn boy this weekend. I guess no more schmegma.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 2:13 pm

does your pink bunny have all his parts intact?

diem · Post by **diem** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 2:15 pm

Simply Joel wrote:this is an example of why i use a dictionary so much...
correct spelling does count. IMHO

smeg·ma
Pronunciation: 'smeg-m&
Function: noun
Etymology: New Latin, from Latin, detergent, soap, from Greek smEgma, from smEchein to wash off, clean
Date: circa 1819
: the secretion of a sebaceous gland; specifically : the cheesy sebaceous matter that collects between the glans penis and the foreskin or around the clitoris and labia minora

or
www.urbandictionary.com

schmegma
sticky substance formed in the uncircumcised skin of the penis due to poor hygine.

schmegma
The smelly funny tasting stuff on my boyfriends weenier

Schmegma
An unidentified, often gross looking substance on door handles, refrigerators, phones, people etc. Schmegma can be found just about anywhere.

you assume I mean "smegma", rather I really did mean "schmegma". It's a bastardized version made popular by lister in red dwarf.

diem · Post by **diem** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 2:16 pm

Rian Jackson wrote:does your pink bunny have all his parts intact?

Ha. You should know being my wife and all. Sheesh.

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 2:16 pm

incredibly embarrassed

they invited me to their ritualized genital mutilation ceremony. Thankfully I had plans. I love them very much but religion is against my religion. Not to mention I would feel bad for the little fella <snigger>.

Nightterror · Post by **Nightterror** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 2:16 pm

Schmegma = Nut butter - I thought everyone knew that -

Rabbi probed for circumcised infants' herpes

Baby died from disease after undergoing procedure
MSNBC staff and news service reports
Updated: 11:50 a.m. ET Feb. 2, 2005
City health officials are investigating the death of a baby boy who was one of three infants to contract herpes after a rabbi circumcised them.
Ten days after Rabbi Yitzhok Fischer performed religious circumcisions on twins last October, one died of herpes and the other tested positive for the virus, according to a complaint filed by the health department in Manhattan Supreme Court.
The complaint, reported in Wednesday’s edition of the New York Daily News, also said health officials later found a third baby who had contracted herpes after being circumcised by Fischer in late 2003.
Under Jewish law, a mohel — someone who performs circumcisions — draws blood from the circumcision wound. Most mohels do it by hand with a suction device, but Fischer uses a practice rare outside strict Orthodox groups where he uses his mouth to draw blood after cutting the foreskin.
Herpes can cause potentially severe complications for infants because of their undeveloped immune systems. A recent study published in the journal Pediatrics found that the rare ritual puts newborns at serious risk of contracting herpes simplex virus and shouldn't be performed as part of the circumcision procedure.
Fischer’s lawyer, Mark Kurzmann, told the Daily News that Fischer was cooperating with the investigation, although it’s unclear whether Fischer submitted to the city’s request for a blood test.
“My client is known internationally as a caring, skilled, and conscientious mohel,” Kurzmann said.

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 2:17 pm

diem wrote:
Rian Jackson wrote:does your pink bunny have all his parts intact?
Ha. You should know being my wife and all. Sheesh.

i only met your pink bunny monday, though maybe i should ask leedeeah. after all, it's her leg that got humped and humped and humped.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 2:22 pm

Nightterror wrote: “My client is known internationally as a caring, skilled, and conscientious mohel,” Kurzmann said.

Somethings stand best alone.

diem · Post by **diem** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 2:22 pm

Rian Jackson wrote:
diem wrote:
Rian Jackson wrote:does your pink bunny have all his parts intact?
Ha. You should know being my wife and all. Sheesh.
i only met your pink bunny monday, though maybe i should ask leedeeah. after all, it's her leg that got humped and humped and humped.

monday? It was long before that. And I have no schmegma.

Ranger Genius · Post by **Ranger Genius** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 2:52 pm

you assume I mean "smegma", rather I really did mean "schmegma". It's a bastardized version made popular by lister in red dwarf.

Lister always just said "smeg," and there was definitely no "ch" in there.

"sixteen counts of referring to a superior officer as a smeghead."

diem · Post by **diem** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 2:59 pm

Ranger Genius wrote:
you assume I mean "smegma", rather I really did mean "schmegma". It's a bastardized version made popular by lister in red dwarf.
Lister always just said "smeg," and there was definitely no "ch" in there.

"sixteen counts of referring to a superior officer as a smeghead."

I beg to differ. i have 'em all on vhs, and every once in a while he'd slip. I like the sound of the extra "ch" better anyhow. So there. Neener neener

Nightterror · Post by **Nightterror** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 3:00 pm

Rabbi probed for circumcised infants' herpes

At first I thought he was hiding the infants' "herpes" somewhere he shouldn't be!

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 3:03 pm

btw, diem. you know well enough i was discussing your bunny-doll-thing that revvy gave you.

if you want your penis included in the category of 'pink', fine... but it will become a target of my jihad.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 3:04 pm

Rian Jackson wrote:btw, diem. you know well enough i was discussing your bunny-doll-thing that revvy gave you.

if you want your penis included in the category of 'pink', fine... but it will become a target of my jihad.

Ouch. The unkindest cut of them all.

diem · Post by **diem** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 3:16 pm

Nightterror wrote:

Rabbi probed for circumcised infants' herpes

At first I thought he was hiding the infants' "herpes" somewhere he shouldn't be!

I think I don't like my own topic. Eww.

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 3:18 pm

i was more disturbed about the rabbi sucking the blood from their penises with his mouth. it just seems...

never mind.

too bad, diem. live with your shame.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 3:22 pm

Rian Jackson wrote:i was more disturbed about the rabbi sucking the blood from their penises with his mouth. it just seems...

Dang it's like those midevil (yes Bob, that's misspelled, too) projection fantasies of jews eating babies and poisoning wells. A little over the top.

And it's just violating all BSI protocols. What if it was hep instead?

If I were a jewish mother and I had a new son and were going to get him

Nah, too much supposition.

diem · Post by **diem** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 3:22 pm

Rian Jackson wrote:i was more disturbed about the rabbi sucking the blood from their penises with his mouth. it just seems...

never mind.

too bad, diem. live with your shame.

but you don't live with me.

HA!!!!

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 3:24 pm

theCryptofishist wrote:
Rian Jackson wrote:i was more disturbed about the rabbi sucking the blood from their penises with his mouth. it just seems...
Dang it's like those midevil (yes Bob, that's misspelled, too) projection fantasies of jews eating babies and poisoning wells. A little over the top.

And it's just violating all BSI protocols. What if it was hep instead?

If I were a jewish mother and I had a new son and were going to get him

Nah, too much supposition.

i was more thinking child molestation images, but that's probably not strictly fair.

diem · Post by **diem** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 3:39 pm

Rian Jackson wrote:
theCryptofishist wrote:
Rian Jackson wrote:i was more disturbed about the rabbi sucking the blood from their penises with his mouth. it just seems...
Dang it's like those midevil (yes Bob, that's misspelled, too) projection fantasies of jews eating babies and poisoning wells. A little over the top.

And it's just violating all BSI protocols. What if it was hep instead?

If I were a jewish mother and I had a new son and were going to get him

Nah, too much supposition.
i was more thinking child molestation images, but that's probably not strictly fair.

*serious bunny quiver* Eww.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 3:40 pm

Rian Jackson wrote:
theCryptofishist wrote:
Rian Jackson wrote:i was more disturbed about the rabbi sucking the blood from their penises with his mouth. it just seems...
Dang it's like those midevil (yes Bob, that's misspelled, too) projection fantasies of jews eating babies and poisoning wells. A little over the top.

And it's just violating all BSI protocols. What if it was hep instead?

If I were a jewish mother and I had a new son and were going to get him

Nah, too much supposition.
i was more thinking child molestation images, but that's probably not strictly fair.

No, no, no that's Catholic priests.

Actually I thought that too. It's wierd boundary crossing. . .And there are accounts of oral sex with infants. . .

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 3:59 pm

theCryptofishist wrote:
Rian Jackson wrote:
theCryptofishist wrote: Dang it's like those midevil (yes Bob, that's misspelled, too) projection fantasies of jews eating babies and poisoning wells. A little over the top.

And it's just violating all BSI protocols. What if it was hep instead?

If I were a jewish mother and I had a new son and were going to get him

Nah, too much supposition.
wait til you hear what he does to sheep.

i was more thinking child molestation images, but that's probably not strictly fair.
No, no, no that's Catholic priests.

Actually I thought that too. It's wierd boundary crossing. . .And there are accounts of oral sex with infants. . .

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 4:00 pm

Rian Jackson wrote:
theCryptofishist wrote:
Rian Jackson wrote:
wait til you hear what he does to sheep.

i was more thinking child molestation images, but that's probably not strictly fair.
No, no, no that's Catholic priests.

Actually I thought that too. It's wierd boundary crossing. . .And there are accounts of oral sex with infants. . .

fuck.

diem · Post by **diem** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 4:00 pm

Actually I thought that too. It's wierd boundary crossing. . .And there are accounts of oral sex with infants. . .[/quote]

from schmega to infant oral sex. I changed my mind -- I'm now proud of this thread.

And yes, I'm using an emoticon. Deal with it.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 4:02 pm

diem wrote:Actually I thought that too. It's wierd boundary crossing. . .And there are accounts of oral sex with infants. . .

from schmega to infant oral sex. I changed my mind -- I'm now proud of this thread. :D

And yes, I'm using an emoticon. Deal with it.[/quote]You better give proper thanks to those of us who brought it through uncharted waters safely.

Gift some Eiswien to the bar.

Rian Jackson · Post by **Rian Jackson** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 4:03 pm

speaking of religious figures, is madonna still hooked on kabbala?

schmegma!

schmegma!

isn't it just a case of poor spelling for the latter?

Re: isn't it just a case of poor spelling for the latter?