Fuck!

[diane o'thirst]

Heh heh heh...

Don't encourage me, all it'd take is for me to get hacked off enough...

Keep in mind that I'm a Kemite Pagan and in ancient Egypt, revenge was not only okay, it was a spiritual necessity...and you could call on no less than Horus and Sekhmet to back you up...

[RebA!]

fuckin upstairs neighbors. If i wanted to hear oontz ooontz oontz I'd go to a fuckin rave. I dont need it upstairs from me.
that and they ruined a perfectly good nap. now i'm just fuckin cranky

[diane o'thirst]

Just went to my local Wild Oats to pick up a box of henna for my hair...I get there and the place is FUCKIN' LOCKED UP, DARK AND EMPTY!! WIth signs on the doors saying, "Sorry, store is closed!"

"Well, fuckin'-A!" I snarled, and drove around the corner to Rite-Aid to pick up some contact lens juice. The clerk at checkout asked me how I was and I said, "Mmmmnneeehh, okay. Just drove by Wild Oats..."

"They are GONE!" the clerk finished for me, with a sympathetic look. "Corporate shut down. And here's something else: my roommate used to work for them, and the managers were recruiting amongst the staff to start their own business like that. Then one day, corporate came down, escorted all the managers out of the store and told them, 'You're fired.' Bunch of rottens!" 'Course we all know what he was really thinking but you can't swear in front of customers...

Haven't gone out to the Willamette store to see if it's gone, too, but that really is fuckin' rotten! We talked a little about the other gourmet/alternative grocery stores and how they're three times as expensive as anywhere else. Sucks canal water. Wild Oats was a good store, and what's worse is they were a big employer here in town. EugeneOregon continues to hemorrhage jobs and this time it's in the name of corporate corruption. And the worse news is, I'm going to have to dig around and find somewhere else to buy my Light Mountain Henna now. Fuck!

[Rob the Wop]

Sorry Rian, but I'm beating you to the punch on this one.

Friday I bring my new Miata (two weeks old with 700 miles on it) into the dealership to have the optional alarm system installed. I had also bought a new car bra and had found out that you would have to remove the front tires to install some special snap topped screws in the wheel well for it. Since the car would be on a lift, and they have air guns that could remove the lug nuts quickly, I asked if they could do this for me while installing the alarm. No problem.

I came home Friday night and discovered that while they had removed the old screws, they didn't install the new ones. Again, no problem. I could bring it in on Saturday before I went cruising around (was possibley going to the coast).

I bring it in on Saturday. It would be a quick 5 minute job to install the screws. While me and Rian are hanging around out front, we hear an odd noise. Rian looks over my shoulder into the shop and her eyes widen. I turn around to discover that my car had fallen off of their lift. The crunch was it being held up by the lift arm in the front driver side wheel well. The Miata was in the air suspended on three points. The driver's side front panel and wheel well were mangled. The back panel showed some dimpling at the corner.

Fuck...

The only saving grace is that it happened at a dealership, which is most probably the best place for something like this to happen. Still sucks big donkey balls.

[bullD]

ohh, shit. I certainly hope they gave you a handjob as well as a loaner or rental.

WTF!!!

How does one drop a fucking car off of a lift?

sorry to hear bout that Rob.

[Rian Jackson]

Oh, and I thought you were going to blame it on me. Feeling generous today? It's repayment for the new years debacle, for what you did to our psyches.

FWIW, I laughed at his car's misfortune all weekend.

On another note: FUCK!

Ample warning - if anyone else that i love attempts to kill themselves anytime soon, I am not responsible for the repercussions to the world. I don't want to see another powder burn on someone's face.

Expect that I'll be a bitch for a few days. Consider yourself warned.

I'm off to go back to being in shock, or something. See ya'll tomorrow....

[PurpleKoosh]

Oh, fuck, RJ....

Can I offer you a hug? Or just a wide berth till you calm down?

[Ranger Genius]

I think those two are mutually exclusive, PK.

Our hearts are with you, R-Jack.

[Rian Jackson]

Oh, fuck, RJ....

Can I offer you a hug? Or just a wide berth till you calm down?

Hugs are good, darlin'. Thank you. I'm just not even sure what to make of it all anymore.

And it's a little hard not to apply the standard relationship idea - that if there's a common thread running through your relationship problems, it's probably you - to this, too. But I know it's not accurate, or fair to myself. Still hard not to do.

Two in just over two weeks.

Ah, fuck.

Just - nobody else, ya'll hear?

Scary, scary shit. I'm terrified of losing some of the people I love most at this moment in time....

[bullD]

RJ, stop being so fucking CUTE!!!


Seriously,,, sweetheart, sorry to hear it but, it's not your fault or responsibility. Hurts though, I know from experience.

[PurpleKoosh]

I think those two are mutually exclusive, PK.

I wasn't sure what she was going to want, so I figured she should know either extreme was available.

[bullD]

ahhh shit, that fucking sucks. I've just had a few moments to reflect. RJ, consider yourself lucky that both attempts failed. I was not that lucky.

[Rian Jackson]

RJ, stop being so fucking CUTE!!!


Seriously,,, sweetheart, sorry to hear it but, it's not your fault or responsibility. Hurts though, I know from experience.

Yeah... I'm glad there was some survival instinct. Good marksmen don't usually miss from close range.

I laid the guilt on today - not about what he tried to do but about the fact that if he ever goes through with it I'll NEVER EVER get over it.

It's hard being the thread that keeps someone hangin' on. And i know, if he'd succeeded, I would have wondered forever if it was because i hadn't called him back...

Anyway, all those stupid ideas we should never think about guilting ourselves with aside, I'm gonna do what I can to support him in making positive steps to find the things he needs.

I'm hoping that I've just seen the worst of it. Hoping.

I've seen too much ugly shit. It's terrible when you can visualise what would happen to a loved one's head if they managed it... *shudder*

Thanks, all of you. Big time.

[Rian Jackson]

ahhh shit, that fucking sucks. I've just had a few moments to reflect. RJ, consider yourself lucky that both attempts failed. I was not that lucky.

Fuck, baby. I can't imagine... well, maybe... I'm sorry.

*enormous, soggy hugs*

[bullD]

RJ: thank you and those hugs are reciprocated.

I think your friend is lucky. hang in there, it's worth it.

[CoworkerLurker]

Oh, fuck, RJ....

Can I offer you a hug? Or just a wide berth till you calm down?

Shit, RJ- you just let me know which you prefer, okay?

[GuinivereElise]

RJ: fucking call me, girl.

In case you don't want to, I offer my biggest warmest guinihug to you... and you can stop by to claim it later today, if'n you want.

[bullD]

Good fuck: last nights brief discussion led to rehashing some great memories...

[Rian Jackson]

continuing fuck: too many suicidal people to be worrying about at one time. Just when one seems temporarily in the clear, the next starts the plunge back downhill. and the reality is that there's very, very little I can do about it. In some cases I'm pretty sure all i can do is make it all worse.

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck.

I can't believe i'm at fucking work.

alright, i switched the evening's beverage plan from tea to tequila... will update LL denizens later....

Somebody just fucking shoot me now.

[samtzu]

Bang?

Naw.... hugs instead....

And thanks for the wonderful evening the other night... I enjoyed it...

[Sandwichman]

continuing fuck: too many suicidal people to be worrying about at one time. Just when one seems temporarily in the clear, the next starts the plunge back downhill. and the reality is that there's very, very little I can do about it. In some cases I'm pretty sure all i can do is make it all worse.

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck.

I can't believe i'm at fucking work.

alright, i switched the evening's beverage plan from tea to tequila... will update LL denizens later....

Somebody just fucking shoot me now.

Many hugs dawling. Do not let other peoples sadness pull you into the same despair. You can only do what you can and even then you cannot let yourself feel responsible for anothers actions. It is very unhealthy and it can really drag you down. Keep positive and be positive around these people and it will reflect into their lives. It is like many things acknowledge a bad behavior too much and it will allow a person to see that it is what they can do to receive your attention. Reinforce the positive in life and it will only add more to its value. I know you know this but sometimes hearing it can be nice.

Jason

PS My personal fuck is a good one. It felt fucking great to see so many friends this weekend and to meet some new friends.

[theCryptofishist]

I agree with Actiongirl up to a point, and then I diverge strongly...

<snip>

Well put Sam, even the part I cut.

[Lydia Love]

RJ, dawlin' - good on ya for laying on the guilt - go ahead and feel free to spread it out big time... that no one that person knows will never ever get over it.

And don't, for the love of gawd, make yourself feel responsible for their survival. They are responsible for their survival, dig? If they're turning to you for emotional support, that's cool, you give 'em what you can... but it's not up to you whether or not they live.

I still miss my friend Juan, and still feel guilty over his death but have started to see that I stepped over some line with it... it wasn't up to me to keep him alive, just do what I could. In the end he made that terrible choice and there wasn't anything I could do to stop it.

[gigglesnort]

Fuck! It's a pandemic in my ghetto tank! All the inbred guppies are dying. Dammit, that's what I get for trying to liven up hte gene pool with a new fish.

[theCryptofishist]

Brought in a pathogen that they just didn't have resistance for. . .

[gigglesnort]

I know! I know! That's what I get for not loving them just as they are, inbred and all. Of course, they were just getting smaller and smaller with each generation....I'm heartbroken.....that gene line literally went back for years, at least two. Even made it through a move with me. Only to be taken out like this. Excuse me while I go change into black.

[theCryptofishist]

continuing f*ck: too many suicidal people to be worrying about at one time. Just when one seems temporarily in the clear, the next starts the plunge back downhill. and the reality is that there's very, very little I can do about it. In some cases I'm pretty sure all i can do is make it all worse.

It's an effin disease and one that has all sorts of barriers (institutional and "moral") to treatment. It's horrible to have and it's horrible to be near. Give it your best, because you'd hate to just abandon them, but cut yourself clear before they take you out with them.

[canwecum]

Fucked fuckers fucking, fucked Fuckers fucked fuckness..

[samtzu]

Fucked fuckers fucking, fucked Fuckers fucked fuckness..

I'm hip...

[bullD]

Fuck!

I have been busy playing with bicycle stuff for the last three hours and have about five hours of homework to do. This IS a recurring problem.

bad, bad, bad!