You know, my mom swears I was pmsing for three years before I had my first. So, giggles I know what you mean.gigglesnort wrote:Well, I fuckin hate it when she takes her sweet time about getting here. I've been premenstrual for half my life now it seems. Or two weeks, at least. Come on already! Hey, didja read that brilliant piece Koosh linked to over at the Red Tent thread? Good for a laugh or a cry or something.
Fuck!
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blueniteowl
- Posts: 2885
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- Location: found in dust
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AntiM
- Moderator
- Posts: 20301
- Joined: Wed Mar 24, 2004 5:23 am
- Burning Since: 2001
- Camp Name: Anti M's Home for Wayward Art
- Location: Wild, Wild West
Fuck. Another day, another "this is it" phonecall from the hospital. This time though, they had us take home all her stuff and asked us which funeral home to use. Dad was really crying once they handed him a Bereavement Package.
The suckiest thing is this could take days or weeks as she isn't dead yet. At least the DNR is back in place, they've stopped meds and she's only on tranqs and painkillers. Assisted suicide my ass, how about exiting with diginity?
And Larry's in Denver, he got so sick he had to park the truck in the company yard and go to the ER. Bronchitis and the flu. At least we have a friend there who has taken him in for now. This is a man who "never" gets sick, so I know he was really bad if he went to the ER without duress.
Did I say FUCK!?
The suckiest thing is this could take days or weeks as she isn't dead yet. At least the DNR is back in place, they've stopped meds and she's only on tranqs and painkillers. Assisted suicide my ass, how about exiting with diginity?
And Larry's in Denver, he got so sick he had to park the truck in the company yard and go to the ER. Bronchitis and the flu. At least we have a friend there who has taken him in for now. This is a man who "never" gets sick, so I know he was really bad if he went to the ER without duress.
Did I say FUCK!?
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Ranger Genius
- Posts: 2408
- Joined: Thu Mar 25, 2004 7:07 am
- Location: Behind the Zion Curtain
- Contact:
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Ranger Genius
- Posts: 2408
- Joined: Thu Mar 25, 2004 7:07 am
- Location: Behind the Zion Curtain
- Contact:
Sorry, M. We're not supposed to say it, but it's a relief for a lot of people when such things happen to loved ones. All they're doing is treading water, prolonging their suffering. I liked your mom. You should probably go and be with your dad now. Or at least someone should.
“We cross our bridges when we come to them and burn them behind us, with nothing to show for our progress except a memory of the smell of smoke, and a presumption that once our eyes watered.”
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geekster
- Posts: 4865
- Joined: Wed Sep 08, 2004 2:53 pm
- Location: Hospice For The Terminally Breathing
- Contact:
M, I am so sorry. She is at least free of the suffering and living on in all whose life she touched. I went through something similar with my Dad (though he was only in his mid 50's at the time). I also had feelings of relief mixed with the feelings of loss.
Time was a healer for me and I hope it is for you as well. Bless you and all who were touched by your Mom, M.
I just can't bring myself to say that word right now, but I will think it, if that is okay.
Time was a healer for me and I hope it is for you as well. Bless you and all who were touched by your Mom, M.
I just can't bring myself to say that word right now, but I will think it, if that is okay.
Pabst Blue Ribbon - The beer that made Gerlach famous.
oh! M...so sorry. wow, babe. these are the times that put life in perspective, eh? lots of love and blessings to you and the family.
((((((((AntiM))))))))
((((((((AntiM))))))))
ERP ~ Emergency Resource Procurement
"if i can't find it, yer f***ed"
https://www.facebook.com/pages/ERP-Emergency-Resource-Procurement/257100377734118
how we roll:
https://www.facebook.com/TheThugboat
"if i can't find it, yer f***ed"
https://www.facebook.com/pages/ERP-Emergency-Resource-Procurement/257100377734118
how we roll:
https://www.facebook.com/TheThugboat
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CoworkerLurker
- Posts: 342
- Joined: Wed Aug 04, 2004 11:00 pm
- Location: the office
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theCryptofishist
- Posts: 40312
- Joined: Mon Feb 23, 2004 9:28 am
- Burning Since: 2017
- Location: In Exile
AntiM
Another milestone passed. f8ckf8ckf8ck. Be good to yourself. Take every comfort you can. Unfortunately, it's the price of life. Let us know if you need anything from us.
Another milestone passed. f8ckf8ckf8ck. Be good to yourself. Take every comfort you can. Unfortunately, it's the price of life. Let us know if you need anything from us.
The Lady with a Lamprey
"The powerful are exploiting people, art and ideas, and this leads to us plebes debating how to best ration ice.
Man, no wonder they always win....." Lonesomebri
"The powerful are exploiting people, art and ideas, and this leads to us plebes debating how to best ration ice.
Man, no wonder they always win....." Lonesomebri
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AntiM
- Moderator
- Posts: 20301
- Joined: Wed Mar 24, 2004 5:23 am
- Burning Since: 2001
- Camp Name: Anti M's Home for Wayward Art
- Location: Wild, Wild West
Hey all y'all,
Thanks for all the good words. I'm actually doing okay, sad and weepy, yes, but generally chipper. I've been stretched thin over the past five weeks, Mom's death was hard this morning, but I'm very glad the waiting is over. She was Not Having Fun and neither were any of us.
One of my brothers has already trotted off to Wendover with his wife so he doesn't have to go to the funeral home tomorrow and to get away from his overly dramatic daughters. That's okay, if he needs time alone, he can have it. That's a Castle trait, we want to be left alone initially to sulk and brood and then we're alright.
How am I dealing? My kitchen is quite clean and I'm eyeing the downstairs. Nothing like the threat of company to get me to clean house. I'm mostly okay until I have to talk to someone, then I get weepy.
I'm more worried about Larry in Denver, he sounds so bad and hoarse on the phone. Poor thing can't drive through the 25th, so getting home for the funeral will be a push for him. He says he's bummed, he liked my mom.
If anyone pm'd me, I'll get around to replying eventually. Thanks for being there all y'all. I know eplaya isn't my personal journal, but it helps to know I can rant here.
Oh, and fuckety fuck fuck fuck.
Thanks for all the good words. I'm actually doing okay, sad and weepy, yes, but generally chipper. I've been stretched thin over the past five weeks, Mom's death was hard this morning, but I'm very glad the waiting is over. She was Not Having Fun and neither were any of us.
One of my brothers has already trotted off to Wendover with his wife so he doesn't have to go to the funeral home tomorrow and to get away from his overly dramatic daughters. That's okay, if he needs time alone, he can have it. That's a Castle trait, we want to be left alone initially to sulk and brood and then we're alright.
How am I dealing? My kitchen is quite clean and I'm eyeing the downstairs. Nothing like the threat of company to get me to clean house. I'm mostly okay until I have to talk to someone, then I get weepy.
I'm more worried about Larry in Denver, he sounds so bad and hoarse on the phone. Poor thing can't drive through the 25th, so getting home for the funeral will be a push for him. He says he's bummed, he liked my mom.
If anyone pm'd me, I'll get around to replying eventually. Thanks for being there all y'all. I know eplaya isn't my personal journal, but it helps to know I can rant here.
Oh, and fuckety fuck fuck fuck.
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PurpleKoosh
- Posts: 1638
- Joined: Wed Sep 03, 2003 11:26 pm
- Burning Since: 2003
- Camp Name: M*A*S*H 4207
- Location: Silly Valley, CA
- Contact:
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DVD Burner
- Posts: 11031
- Joined: Fri Dec 12, 2003 3:09 am
- Burning Since: 1986
- Camp Name: White Trash Camp
- Contact:
AntiM
I've fallowed this all day, and have always felt a lose for words what can any of us really say. " My condolences " maybe does say it, I don't know. My love goes out to you, I know how hard it's been, and it's good it's over, I know the tremendous feeling of lose and the whole complexity of emotion, the sorrow, the fond memories, the unreality of it all, and the solid rightness of the cycle of life, and the loneliness....
I've fallowed this all day, and have always felt a lose for words what can any of us really say. " My condolences " maybe does say it, I don't know. My love goes out to you, I know how hard it's been, and it's good it's over, I know the tremendous feeling of lose and the whole complexity of emotion, the sorrow, the fond memories, the unreality of it all, and the solid rightness of the cycle of life, and the loneliness....
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Elemental666
- Posts: 391
- Joined: Mon Feb 21, 2005 11:19 pm
Death is only the end of life in realm, the pain, suffering and the terminal physicality are over. Its hard to keep it in mind sometimes, but your mother is now free, her energy soaks the heavens and her love will find its way home, wherever that may be. I've lost 3 people close to me in the last 4 years and the only thing that keeps together sometimes is the memory of their smiling faces and knowing that they will smile at me again, when i trancend this crude world and take my place in the stars above.
I don't know you, but that doesn't mean I can't send you my love...
Be well,
-Ele
I don't know you, but that doesn't mean I can't send you my love...
Be well,
-Ele
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PurpleKoosh
- Posts: 1638
- Joined: Wed Sep 03, 2003 11:26 pm
- Burning Since: 2003
- Camp Name: M*A*S*H 4207
- Location: Silly Valley, CA
- Contact:
We now return you to "Fuck!" already in progress.
I.
Am.
So.
FUCKING.
Sick.
Of.
This.
How much fucking longer do I have to hurt? How much fucking longer do I have to keep fucking missing him? How much fucking longer am I going to keep flinching every fucking time I see a car that looks like his, wondering if I'm about to encounter him unexpectedly?
And now I find out that one of the first Burners he introduced me to has fucking CANCER, and he's the only one of my close friends who knows this person, and I CAN'T SHARE MY FUCKING FEELINGS WITH SOMEONE WHO UNDERSTANDS.
Why the fuck did breaking up have to be the right thing?
Am.
So.
FUCKING.
Sick.
Of.
This.
How much fucking longer do I have to hurt? How much fucking longer do I have to keep fucking missing him? How much fucking longer am I going to keep flinching every fucking time I see a car that looks like his, wondering if I'm about to encounter him unexpectedly?
And now I find out that one of the first Burners he introduced me to has fucking CANCER, and he's the only one of my close friends who knows this person, and I CAN'T SHARE MY FUCKING FEELINGS WITH SOMEONE WHO UNDERSTANDS.
Why the fuck did breaking up have to be the right thing?
Anything purple is mine. Anything else can be dyed or painted.
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gigglesnort
- Posts: 3099
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spectabillis
- Posts: 3527
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- Location: black rock city
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Last Real Burner
- Posts: 941
- Joined: Mon Sep 01, 2003 9:34 am
- Location: Heaven
- Contact:
delayed fuck....
FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!
ahhhhh that's better
fuckingly,
me
ahhhhh that's better
fuckingly,
me
"Do you know what happened to the boy who got everything he wished for? - He lived happily ever after".
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joel the ornery
- Posts: 2657
- Joined: Sun Aug 31, 2003 3:28 pm
- Burning Since: 1998
- Location: i'm the snarky one in your worst fucking nightmares
- Contact:
fucking project office position
my boss wants me to be the fucking project officer...
he thinks money is my fucking motivation...
fuck fuck fuck.
he thinks money is my fucking motivation...
fuck fuck fuck.