Define : AssHat.......

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evacado
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Asshats

Post by evacado » Sat May 21, 2005 11:43 am

The word "ass hat" is derived from two sources. One being the thin piece of paper that 'protects' your derriere from the festering, seething multitude of other people's ass-germs that may be lurking on the toilet you're filling with excrement. Strangely, although we are unwilling to share butt-space, we are willing to turn any doorknob or faucet handle around, that some snotty four-year-old may have just slimed their grimy staph-infested paws all over. I don't know about you, but the skin across the posterior of my hips is much cleaner than my palms at any given moment.
I digress.
This use of the word "asshat" compares the recipient of such a label to said flimsy paper that so often graces our rear ends.
The second connotation of the word "asshat" is something or someone ridiculously useless. Like, what use could a hat be for your ass? It is somewhat synonymous with doofus, jackass, stuporvisor, quality control specialist, or House Minority Leader.
"I felt dumb, standing around like an asshat, but what could I do?"
"That asshat always tries to get in without a ticket."

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othereye
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Post by othereye » Sat May 21, 2005 3:30 pm

I think it could also just fall under the standard rules of schoolyard taunts. i.e. anything ending in head or face is an insult (poohead, dumbface), and anything starting with an exrement-related term is an insult (fartbreath, doodyhead (yes that's a double)). However we're all old enough to use the word ass without getting our mouths washed out, so "ass" can take the place of doody, poo, ad infinitum.

Or it could fall under my friend Tim's rule for insults, which is as follows: Any two words that sounds funnily insulting together constitute an insult. Bonus points for inclusion of baked goods. Past examples include "toaster biscuit", "butt muffin" (opposite of the complimentary muffin butt!) and "ass Triscuit". He's perfected this to such an art that he was credited on a recent indepentent film for his "Insult Consultant" contributions.
"Sometimes, honey, you just have to look reality in the eye and say..... 'what happened to your other eye, dude?!'" - Angela Waversak, as quoted on eriswerks.org

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EvilDustBooger
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Post by EvilDustBooger » Sun May 22, 2005 1:11 am

Hey I like the baked goods idea. Throw in a little alliteration and you`ve got:

Casserole Crack

Custard Crotch

Lasagna Lips

Ham Hole

Spud Spoo

Pineapple Upside-down Pants

OK that was going just abit too far...........

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geekster
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Post by geekster » Sun May 22, 2005 1:19 am

This

Image

is an asshat.
Pabst Blue Ribbon - The beer that made Gerlach famous.

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EvilDustBooger
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Post by EvilDustBooger » Sun May 22, 2005 1:22 am

Looks more like a city-tittie to me!!!

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geekster
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Post by geekster » Sun May 22, 2005 2:00 am

Image

Need more proof?

Image

How about ...

Image
Pabst Blue Ribbon - The beer that made Gerlach famous.

robotland
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Re: Asshats

Post by robotland » Mon May 23, 2005 5:34 am

evacado wrote:The word "ass hat" is derived from two sources. One being the thin piece of paper that 'protects' your derriere from the festering, seething multitude of other people's ass-germs that may be lurking on the toilet you're filling with excrement. "
I've always referred to those as ass GASKETS.
Howdy From Kalamazoo

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Sharky
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Re: Asshats

Post by Sharky » Mon May 23, 2005 12:11 pm

robotland wrote:
evacado wrote:The word "ass hat" is derived from two sources. One being the thin piece of paper that 'protects' your derriere from the festering, seething multitude of other people's ass-germs that may be lurking on the toilet you're filling with excrement. "
I've always referred to those as ass GASKETS.
....................or COWBOY HATS!
Sort of appropriate with a Bush in office ........... on second thought that WOULD make it an ASS HAT!
"To travel, to experience and learn - that is to live"

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Nightterror
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Post by Nightterror » Mon May 23, 2005 6:54 pm

Ham Hole -


I laughed my ASS off. So much, in fact, that my HAT fell off.

BTW, Assgasket = Butt Biscuit


NT
I express my excitement by brutally interrogating whomever is nearby

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unjonharley
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Post by unjonharley » Mon May 23, 2005 7:12 pm

my daughter calls little old lady drivers hats. That's all you can see is the hat/blue hair.

I use asshat for dumb shit/asses/fucks/wads add:.
I'm the contraptioneer your mother warned you about.

robotland
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Post by robotland » Tue May 24, 2005 5:37 am

unjonharley wrote:my daughter calls little old lady drivers hats. That's all you can see is the hat/blue hair.

:.
AKA "Cue Tips", "Knucklepuffs", or "Ghost Cars".
Howdy From Kalamazoo

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Ranger Genius
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Post by Ranger Genius » Tue May 24, 2005 7:46 am

I interpreted "asshat" to mean someone who was wearing their ass as a hat, in other words a clever way to say that the individual in question had their head lodged in their rectum.
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