Strictly Barnyard

BigCock · Post by **BigCock** » Sun Jan 22, 2006 8:17 am

(MOSTLY) LIVE UNDERAGED CHICKS DELIVERED TO YOUR DOORSTEP! But don't count them until they're unpacked.

"___ is proud to be able to provide you with a wide selection of quality birds, chicks and eggs shipped anywhere in the United States ...

BIRD GUARANTEE
We appreciate the service of the US Postal Service and the Airlines to provide a way to ship baby poultry to your post office ...

Notify us within 48 hrs. of arrival of any birds that may have died.
Please report to us the number of live birds and the number of dead birds. We will, at our discretion, refund or give inhouse credit for the purchase price of the dead birds, counting in any extra chicks received."

Zulegoona · Post by **Zulegoona** » Sun Jan 22, 2006 8:42 am

I’d be real leery, If somebody offers to send under aged chicks to your house, it sounds like a LEO sting operation to me.
And as for eggs, didn’t that Korean cloning doctor get into trouble paying for eggs, though I’ve heard US fertility clinics arrange for people to buy eggs from college girls, still mail order, I don’t think so.

robotland · Post by **robotland** » Sun Jan 22, 2006 9:19 am

Don't forget that it becomes a federal affair after they "cross the road"....

spectabillis · Post by **spectabillis** » Sun Jan 22, 2006 9:26 am

Dead asian ones can be reported to the CDC

Bambi of Finland · Post by **Bambi of Finland** » Sun Jan 22, 2006 11:29 am

Can I get a franchise on the innoculation program? Send along some Tamiflu.

BigCock · Post by **BigCock** » Sun Jan 22, 2006 3:16 pm

The international situation is especially dire. The handling of the avian flu epidemic is another example of blaming the victim while big pharma cashes in. Livestock and their advocates around the world are taking matters into their own hands, feet, wings, paws and/or hooves.

Tami Flu · Post by **Tami Flu** » Sun Jan 22, 2006 9:43 pm

Okay all, line up for your shots. BigCock I'm gonna need a DNA sample from you. Go ahead and step into the stall next to the geese laying the golden eggs. Oh and lift your tail feathers I need to see what your made of.

Bambi of Finland · Post by **Bambi of Finland** » Sun Jan 22, 2006 9:58 pm

Ahemm... Something smells funny. Could it be a dirty sock? You look like your carrying disease, not curing it.

Bambi of Finland · Post by **Bambi of Finland** » Sun Jan 22, 2006 10:02 pm

I'll be giving the shots... and keep your hands off the BigCock!

Tami Flu · Post by **Tami Flu** » Sun Jan 22, 2006 10:11 pm

You seem a little angry. Are you still going through the transition? Can I recommend some electrolysis to put you at ease.

Kinetic IV · Post by **Kinetic IV** » Sun Jan 22, 2006 10:15 pm

Bambi of Finland · Post by **Bambi of Finland** » Sun Jan 22, 2006 10:18 pm

Oh honey... lets go have a drink. you seem like alot of fun, and maybe we can begin your extreme makeover. Its all good. Try to ease in to this crowd and observe a little before you start to dispense beauty tips.

Bambi of Finland · Post by **Bambi of Finland** » Sun Jan 22, 2006 10:21 pm

Kinetic IV wrote:

Why thank you Kinetic, Look Tami maybe you can do some laundry before you head over to the Bar..

BigCock · Post by **BigCock** » Sun Jan 22, 2006 10:44 pm

Tami Flu wrote:Okay all, line up for your shots. BigCock I'm gonna need a DNA sample from you. Go ahead and step into the stall next to the geese laying the golden eggs. Oh and lift your tail feathers I need to see what your made of.

There's only one way this cock gives out DNA, and it doesn't involve lifting MY tail feathers. heh heh

I jest, but fowlophilia is rampant, and twisted. A casual Google search yielded this:

Contents:
* Sexing Baby Chicks The CHILDREN for Pete's sake!!!!
* Sight Sexed Baby Chicks I've heard that looks can kill, but this sounds more like rape!
* Crossing for Wing Sexing Even trannies give a flying fk
* Micro-sexing For those with a 'little' problem
* Determining Sex of Ducks, Geese and Swans as opposed to indifferent sex, I guess
* Sexing Wild Waterfowl You've done the farm, now lookout swamp!
* Vent Sexing Guineas Turn that habitrail around!
* Sexing Day Old Ringneck Pheasants Trickle down pedo-necro-philia
* Determining Sex of Ruffled Grouse They weren't ruffled before the exam
* Sexing Parrots, Canaries, Woodcocks, Wattles, Pigeons, Finches, Cockatiels, Caged birds, Pea Fowl. Put an end to evolutionary differentiation, right in your own back yard!
* Sexing Ostrich, Rhea. The author's wife's name is Rhea. He was on a roll ...
* Much, Much, More How much more could there possibly be?

BigCock · Post by **BigCock** » Tue Jan 24, 2006 8:23 am

http://www.hypnoticclambake.com/sound/sdance.mp3

Ladies do and the gents you know,
It’s right by right by wrong you go,
And you can’t go to heaven while you carry on so,
And it’s home little gal and do-si-do,
And it may be the last time, I don’t know,
And oh by gosh and oh by Joe.

BigCock · Post by **BigCock** » Mon Feb 06, 2006 8:28 pm

San Jose man wins eating contest by eating 173 chicken wings

PHILADELPHIA – A 22-year-old man from San Jose won the Wing Bowl on Friday by setting a new record at the annual chicken wing-eating contest.
Joey Chestnut ate 173 wings to take the title and top prize, a 2006 Suzuki Grand Vitara.
As usual, the 14th annual Wing Bowl was replete with thousands of beer-crazed fans, piles of saucy wings, dozens of scantily clad “Wingettes” – many of them strippers – and several sickened contestants.
This year's version of the contest, sponsored by sports-talk station WIP-AM, included only competitors who had never before competed in the Wing Bowl.

WARNING. Do not let this man into your barnyard.

173?!?!? So what, there are 86 wingless chickens now and one mutilated one? Total silence of the lamb sicko business! And sponsored by who? Talk radio!

Mozy bonz · Post by **Mozy bonz** » Sun Mar 19, 2006 5:13 pm