Sex - Page 2

blyslv · Post by **blyslv** » Tue May 01, 2007 1:32 pm

LordBarkin wrote:Look I am not saying burning man is all about the sex I just want to know some of the interesting shit to get me and my wifey excited you know?

Come on people must have some more stories

You're a stranger here, 10 posts. Yet you come in and demand that people tell you stories to get you off? What do YOU have to offer, LordBentoverbarking?

EvilDustBooger · Post by **EvilDustBooger** » Tue May 01, 2007 2:18 pm

LordBarkin wrote: I just want to know some of the interesting shit to get me and my wifey excited you know?

Come on people must have some more stories

ok ok
one of the more exciting sexually related things I saw on playa was, once again...not the usual experience.

There was this place called GasoPump station or something like that.
They had a thing called the "Orgasmatron" where mostly women would sit on a contraption and get vibrated until they got off...all in front of a rather large and appreciative crowd. Well, that got shut down for a violation of this or that and they had to close down the attraction. But, There was a part of it that stayed open however,... and it involved dropping your drawers, bending over, and although I never got close to see the actual process(shudder) it appeared that they placed a "gas-hose" in your ass, and then something exploded and the "participants" would run screaming off with very suprised wide eyed looks. I don`t believe it hurt anyone seriously but it looked like it smarted...

actually I`ve wondered ever since just what the hell that was all about, and what kind of individual would let a complete stranger explode something in / on his ass....

...or do I really want to know?

I suppose you are thinking I`m making this all up...

It`s twue it`s all twue I`m tellin` ya

LordBarkin · Post by **LordBarkin** » Tue May 01, 2007 2:57 pm

Actually my real name is Lord Barkin its Irish and Russian and what happened with the burning man spirit of giving?

I am about to go to my studio film lab but your right. Afterwards I will have to share some stories too. Gotta give something back you know

blyslv · Post by **blyslv** » Tue May 01, 2007 2:58 pm

I have the deatils on that infernal device, I even know who made it.

What will you gift me for this information?

I will say it was quite cleansing and healing.

[/i]

MikeVDS · Post by **MikeVDS** » Tue May 01, 2007 3:11 pm

Well, that got shut down for a violation of this or that and they had to close down the attraction.

Did the police shut them down? Or do you know the details?

the fire elf · Post by **the fire elf** » Tue May 01, 2007 3:15 pm

LordBarkin wrote:what happened with the burning man spirit of giving?

idealisssities aside,
it's been amalgamated
with survival of the fittest...

life is life,
n'matter what form proliferates.

there's a difference between a stick thingy with no hands

and,
~hands

mayavin · Post by **mayavin** » Tue May 01, 2007 3:20 pm

*electricity-assisted hand dancing*

why'how come they broken?

why they hurt when i do this?

do inceptions of specie manifest a similar mate?

or just lone?

LordBarkin · Post by **LordBarkin** » Tue May 01, 2007 3:34 pm

its got no feelings only feelers what could be easier to ride

the fire elf · Post by **the fire elf** » Tue May 01, 2007 3:39 pm

depends on who your next to

LordBarkin · Post by **LordBarkin** » Tue May 01, 2007 3:41 pm

Ok so my studio teacher is busy helping a student with the control unit.

hmm so a story......

drug story?
sex story?
hiking?
Canoing?

any preference bylylr?

mayavin · Post by **mayavin** » Tue May 01, 2007 3:43 pm

you brought up the topic...

don't you at least know how to end it
if you can't move forward coherently?

LordBarkin · Post by **LordBarkin** » Tue May 01, 2007 3:51 pm

well jesus christ it wanted something back and I had the decency not to bore someone with something they don't want to hear

I didn't mean to undermine your rank captain coherence I wont forget to salute you next time

and come on I sincerely wanted some stories to get my girlfriend excited, the beaver eating contest did the trick she thinks its going to be a blast.

If I wanted to get off I would just look at tigers duh

mayavin · Post by **mayavin** » Tue May 01, 2007 4:00 pm

salutations are dry and tasteless these days...

lest the world get the wrong impression,
and suspect that i carry your counsel

there is naught that you undermine
but your own ability to be other than prosaic
amongsts folks such as these

they might consider that rude

Sensei · Post by **Sensei** » Tue May 01, 2007 4:11 pm

I hate to tell you this, but someone has to do it.

Your socks. They smell.

Thought you'd like to know.

EvilDustBooger · Post by **EvilDustBooger** » Tue May 01, 2007 4:15 pm

MikeVDS wrote:
Well, that got shut down for a violation of this or that and they had to close down the attraction.

Did the police shut them down? Or do you know the details?

I`m not clear on exactly what happened, but I think an un-authorized photo of a satisfied customer made it into one of the BRC rags and the ORG made them do their Orgasmatron biz in private, instead of in full view of the people on the esplanade.....I think.

It was a kick to watch the spectacle while it lasted for a day or 2...

mayavin · Post by **mayavin** » Tue May 01, 2007 4:15 pm

multiple personaes
like the multifaced dieties of old
serves my cognitative jumping jacks
better through two

one just feels soo boxed in sometimes

EvilDustBooger · Post by **EvilDustBooger** » Tue May 01, 2007 4:23 pm

blyslv wrote:I have the deatils on that infernal device, I even know who made it.

What will you gift me for this information?

I will say it was quite cleansing and healing.
[/i]

My ears are ringing with curiosity!

Please fill in the details about Gaso...

All I can think of to gift you would be some creamy goat cheese from Provence and a glass of Shiraz if we ever meet on the playa.

...I promise to not proposition you for sexual favors.

will that work?

Dr. Pyro · Post by **Dr. Pyro** » Tue May 01, 2007 4:50 pm

blyslv, Sensei, move away from the Dark Side. You know where you belong. I am your father Luke.

LordBarkin · Post by **LordBarkin** » Tue May 01, 2007 4:55 pm

Alright well I will tell the story of a kickass guy by the name of Kenyan I met in the forests of big sir. I would never have met this guy without the salutations you rhyme so pessimistically about oh elliptical yet creepily beautiful captain mayavin of coherence.

So big sur is home to many natural hot springs that have been tapped and pooled into these bowls of rocks and that is why my friends and i journeyed there.

The hike in is just about 6 hours a 11 mile up and down trek thats pretty rough.

After a 6 hour hike and a twisted ankle I had to brace we finally got to the river we were going to camp by and set up our camp. We gather enough wood to stay there for a couple days and set off to find the hot springs. Imagine a river that at the deepest is about shoulder height, glacial run-off so it's freezing, and is moving just enough to make some great ambient sounds. red woods and junipers are leaning over it making some great shadow play and causing rays of light to splash all over the giant rocks that border it. The springs are set into the rocks, the top one is about 100 feet from the river almost straight up. If you slide down a rock that holds the rock bowl that is the spring you end up in another spring. And over the edge of that cliff is the last spring literally sticking halfway into the river.

All of the springs were full of people, all kinds of interesting looking people. At this point we had all consumed numerous colored candies and were smoking some bomb waiting our turn when all of a sudden my eye caught one of the guys sitting in the spring up top. He had this look in his eye kind of like the look you see in a great whites eye on the discovery channel except not necessarily hostile just true, animal, and chock full of grit. I motioned for my friends to follow and we plopped into the spring he was attending causing the other people there to kind of move off. (We found out later they had been there all morning selfishly and Kenyan told us later they werent very friendly anyway)

He smiled a huge smile at me like we a private joke going and said very matter of factly, Hello I'm Kenyan nice to meet you, and held out his hand. We immediately hit it off, it was amazing that what I saw in his eyes prompted a long standing good relationship with this amazing bohemian. The story goes on but basically what happened next was he ate some of our candy and we proceeded to climb an outrageously baller cliff face barely escaping with our lives( Kenyan saved my girlfriends life when a basketball sized rock rolled down and almost hit her in the face). He turned out to be a traveling psych grad who lives in diff places in the forests all over. We gave him all of our extra food (lbs of coos coos and powdered milk) allowing him to live there for another week. (he was out of food) In exchange he brought us wood on our last night when we had none.

I havent seen him since but he promised to come by on his way to the mojave so we could backpack with him for a while something i'm greatly looking forward to. I hope some of you BMers have some similar stories to contribute I am all about crazy adventure stories.

Toolmaker · Post by **Toolmaker** » Wed May 02, 2007 3:44 am

I like to masturbate like a zoo monkey.

dragonfly Jafe · Post by **dragonfly Jafe** » Wed May 02, 2007 6:48 am

MikeVDS wrote:
Well, that got shut down for a violation of this or that and they had to close down the attraction.
Did the police shut them down? Or do you know the details?

The device is called the Orgasmatron, is a staple of the Gas-o full-service station that has been part of the GLOM for years. The other device is the "Gas-o" part. They shoot propane and ignite it. Aside from some burnt hairs, it doesn't really do much except feel weird.

The Orgasmatron wasn't "shut-down", the police merely asked that it be removed off Esplanade since it was so, graphic.

Don't know if either will be back in 2007, rumor has it the Mayor is taking a year off.....

blyslv · Post by **blyslv** » Wed May 02, 2007 8:52 am

EvilDustBooger wrote:...I promise to not proposition you for sexual favors.

will that work?

that depends, how big are your tits?

EvilDustBooger · Post by **EvilDustBooger** » Wed May 02, 2007 9:15 am

The Orgasmatron wasn't "shut-down", the police merely asked that it be removed off Esplanade since it was so, graphic.

I really enjoyed watching the myriad expressions on the participant`s faces.

From:
Embarassment to
Playfullness to
Pain to
Intense Concentration to
Seriousness to
Suprise to
Joy to
Tranquility....

and then that freshly fucked look

.....really nice.

blyslv wrote:
EvilDustBooger wrote:...I promise to not proposition you for sexual favors.

will that work?
that depends, how big are your tits?

I have a nicely formed fuzzy man-chest if that`s of any interest.

If you gave me a little warning, I`d probably let you feel it, but I`d prefer to just gift you with wine and cheese and call it good...

Teo del Fuego · Post by **Teo del Fuego** » Wed May 02, 2007 10:29 am

So Lord B

Now you see

You asked about sex

At BRC

And only got

Bad hippie poetry

That was hardly hot.

If sex is all you seek

And Im sure its not

You would be disappointed

But, alas, you will not be

But for different reasons

Just wait and see

I channeled this poem while contemplating the chakra of the sun as it revolved into the dimension of the tiger-elephant enveloped in the propane expulsion from the anus.

LordBarkin · Post by **LordBarkin** » Wed May 02, 2007 11:17 am

Well said Fuego
I'm disappointed
But, whatever

concerning the actual event
I can't phucking wait

my comrades have been appointed
122 days to date
I bet i'm anything but disappointed

but in the case of the tigers and elephants
moons, stars
and GIF files of the sun

I'd have to agree
albeit tiger pix = fun

EvilDustBooger · Post by **EvilDustBooger** » Wed May 02, 2007 11:43 am

Oh please don`t let the spirit die !

...my fuzzy man chest heaves in anticipation of more sexy talk!

more please more !

the fire elf · Post by **the fire elf** » Wed May 02, 2007 12:50 pm

i've heard the presence of sages
is earned through active dharma

yet a sage on the warpath
would see 'quality time'
in a slightly different light

LordBarkin · Post by **LordBarkin** » Wed May 02, 2007 12:59 pm

whose on a warpath? mayavin?

the fire elf · Post by **the fire elf** » Wed May 02, 2007 12:59 pm

some see dirt
some see war

LordBarkin · Post by **LordBarkin** » Wed May 02, 2007 1:12 pm

Well Shit

Let's talk about !

The existence of good and evil, sex and drugs everything and more. From the knowledge we develop from being a part of this hedonistic bohemian network of events and relationships to the longstanding iboard residents and fans. Look I'm a poet! said from behind the trenches.
*cough**cough*
the so called

Burning MaN