I need help! I want to find a nice camp for my dad!

jennymarie · Post by **jennymarie** » Fri May 09, 2008 8:49 am

Hi everyone!

My awesome dad wants to go to Burning Man! He's an amazing guy, one of my best friends, BUT- we both think it's better we put a little distance between our camps :) What I would love to find is a camp of older, down to earth burners that he can pitch camp with. He's 56, an avid mountain biker, a margarita master, an excellent cook... and he can build ANYTHING! If anyone has any questions or suggestions I would LOVE to be in touch! I really want him to have an amazing time so please reply or email me : )

Thanks!

[email protected]

phil · Post by **phil** » Fri May 09, 2008 9:42 am

Tell him that Burning Man is all about self-reliance and to find his own camp.

ragabashpup · Post by **ragabashpup** » Fri May 09, 2008 9:44 am

He should just go ahead and make a profile on here so folks can learn more about him since he will need to directly interact with his campmates.

Very sweet of you to try and do this for your father but he should just go ahead and do it. It will be a much better experience for him that way.

Post by **AntiM** » Fri May 09, 2008 10:03 am

Ah, the annual "older burners" and "my parental unit is cool, but not cool enough to camp with" thread.

Raga's right, he should be here making friends himself. Otherwise we'll have to wonder why he isn't making the effort for himself.

Our camp has a mother-daughter combo. Never been an issue. If you don't want to camp together, cool, but he's got to do the footwork, not you. Certainly not us.

mojo · Post by **mojo** » Fri May 09, 2008 10:06 am

Yep, the question sounded a lot like you were shopping for a rest home.

jennymarie · Post by **jennymarie** » Fri May 09, 2008 10:51 am

a lot of people are taking this the wrong way, this isn't what I expected.. I'd rather it just stop here. Thanks, anyways.

Post by **AntiM** » Fri May 09, 2008 11:01 am

You're the OP, it was up to you to make yourself clear. Now, I might hear "that's not very burnerly" about the responses, but it is, radical self-reliance. Which means if a grown man doesn't want to camp with his daughter he makes other arrangements, not her.

Personally, I don't know of "older burner camps", I only know of camps with mixed age populations. I'm 51, and trying to be amused rather than insulted.

What did you expect? A list? Check out theme camps on the main site, I'd be surprised if you found one which mentions age. Quiet camps, mellow camps, camps which take in on their own stragglers, yes. Older burner camps? Hand me the cluebat, Willis.

Yeah, I know, she'll likely never read this. For the benefit of other people wandering wanting a camp for their parent.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Fri May 09, 2008 11:39 am

My mother and I always camp seperately. She's at Camp Reality, Berkeley Section.

jennymarie · Post by **jennymarie** » Fri May 09, 2008 11:40 am

Well, you're right, I don't think it's very burnerly. I guess that kind of sums up the paradox of a community that prides itself on accepting and gifting, yet stresses radical self-reliance as "what it's all about". Only last night we figured out he'd be able to go and I was trying to get a feel of maybe some people he could talk with or groups he could join, even if only in pre-playa discussion. As for the cluebat- most of the camps I was around (and the one I was in) were mainly people under 30. Age doesn't matter, he'd happily camp with people of all ages, but would prefer camping with some people his own age. It takes all ages and all ages should be there- no one should take offense to that. He barely has enough time to finish his work, rarely has time to do anything else and I thought that since I had the time I would feel it out a bit for him. It's not ME that will be 'placing' him in a camp. I'm just trying to start the ball rolling. I see that most of you spend a LOT of time on here, but he doesn't and won't- NOT because he isn't interested, but because he doesn't have the time.. I'll admit, I was vague, but it's a bit disappointing that rather than ask questions I recieved the replies that I did. I didn't expect a list, nor do I expect to have someone say "Come on, old timer, join our group of margarita drinking, mountain bikers." There aren't many theme camps listed yet on the main page, and thought since I was asking advice and such I would post here.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Fri May 09, 2008 11:52 am

Be aware, be very aware, that the core group of people on this forum have been here for a few years and don't get paid. We see a parade of stupid questions, mostly the same ones over and over and it's hard not to get snarky. We deal with our own work issues, and home issues, and health issues, and our worries about how the event is changing and do newbies "get" it; sometimes our patience gets thin. Plus there is a tendency to do a bit of hazing of newcomers--make them earn thier places. You might be better off advertising for some older people to join your camp. Or asking camp mates if they know of other camps that might want him.

StevenGoodman · Post by **StevenGoodman** » Fri May 09, 2008 12:34 pm

Umm, research, research, research.

http://eplaya.burningman.org/viewforum.php?f=107

http://www.burningman.com/whatisburning ... s_num.html

http://www.burningman.com/themecamps/08 ... umber.html

There are hundreds and hundreds of theme camps. Read through them all, send out emails, check out websites, post on forums with specific questions.

Martini Steve

jennymarie · Post by **jennymarie** » Fri May 09, 2008 12:53 pm

Thanks Cryptofishist, I know what you mean, and I know it must get old.. but (though this belongs in another forum) in response to the do the newbies "get" it idea- fair shout, and some of them may not, but it's forums like this and snarky comments that turn them off of what BM should be in the first place. To the snarkers- this is what is listed on Q & A Etiquette:
[i]
Welcome, everyone. Just a couple of guidelines to keep this a productive and informative forum:

1 - This is meant to be a safe place to ask questions. There is a lot of info about Burning Man out there. You are not expected to know it all but please read through the Survival Guide and take a minute to browse the other topics here before posting. The answers you need just might be right in front of you.

2 - That said, new folks often have the same questions as old folks did when they were new, so they get asked over and over. This is to be expected and anyone who gets frustrated by the repetition may want to consider spending time in another area.

3- That said, please do not make snap judgements based on a question asked. Answer with information or move along.

Ok now, what is it you wanted to know?

~technopatra~
eplaya admin[/i]

BitterDan · Post by **BitterDan** » Fri May 09, 2008 1:49 pm

That said, new folks often have the same questions as old folks did when they were new, so they get asked over and over.

That may be what THEY say this forum is for but WE are the users and in the end WE determine what this community is all about. That statement above should give you an indication that this question has been probably been asked before and is available to you simply by clicking the "search" button. Now, in your particular case I don't think that the search function would have been much use since I have never seen this particular question come up.

That being said, as it has been said a thousand times before, EPLAYA is not THE playa and you can expect the anonymity of the internet to bring out the snarkiness of us all. We're all bored and any opportunity to smash a newbie is golden. On the playa we'd probably be the first to help you out and answer your questions but here we are just looking for fresh meat to gnaw on. Sorry that it's that way but that's the way it is. If you're going to post on eplaya (or ANY message board on the intraweb) then you had better be prepared to be ridiculed and ripped a new one once in a while. Thick skin is crucial to internet discussion.

P.S. We are probably even more snarky and on-edge as we approach the 100 days til burning man mark and none of us are actually prepared yet...

Post by **AntiM** » Fri May 09, 2008 1:52 pm

http://eplaya.burningman.org/viewtopic.php?t=23146

jennymarie · Post by **jennymarie** » Fri May 09, 2008 2:18 pm

Yeah, I saw that post but couldn't find the one that mdmf007 mentioned, the one about the lengthy pre-burn 07 post about the girl and her dad.. If you find that one I'd love to see it, sounds like what I need..

phil · Post by **phil** » Fri May 09, 2008 2:28 pm

> "Answer with information or move along."

I will suggest to you that you got answers with excellent information: Burning Man is about self-reliance, your dad should find his own camp; he should put his profile on here so folks can learn more about him - he needs to interact directly with his campmates; he should be here making friends himself.

You don't like these ideas and think they're snarky. If I understand correctly, your dad has barely enough time to finish his work, rarely has time to do anything else, and he won't be posting here because he doesn't have time. I understand also that he is an avid mountain biker, master margarita maker, and excellent cook, but that he won't be putting up his profile, interacting directly on ePlaya, and making friends himself because he's too busy. He's interested, but he just doesn't have the time.

I understand you'd like to find for your dad a group of older, down to earth burners to camp with. May I suggest it's a two way street? A group of older, down to earth burners would like to know who they're camping with. It's a shame he's just too busy to build a relationship.

My personal view is that you are not being taken to task here; you are not being gnawed on as fresh meat. You really are being given valuable advice, but your dad is just too busy to make friends and be invited out by his new friends. You've set him up in a situation where he's losing the opportunity to learn about Burning Man from long-time and short-time burners who have experiences and stories that would knock his socks off. People who would have loved to have access to his skills, if only he'd been here to share a few of his experiences with us. A little of his time.

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Fri May 09, 2008 3:17 pm

To be fair, I can't get the search function to perform a useful search.
Can you search titles only?

If you camp together, you probably still won't see each other the whole time.

A lot of older burners are in the bigger rv and trailer areas, probably because they want the luxury and can afford it.
I never met anyone unfriendly in those groups.
A lot of people over 60 go, many more than people think.

Why does he think the age of the people in the camp matters?
It would be at the bottom of my list.
I've never thought about this before, but I don't want to camp with morons.
I don't want people waking me up early, i.e. suicidal morons.
Other than that, I can't really think of anything.
I think I could camp with most people there.

jennymarie · Post by **jennymarie** » Fri May 09, 2008 3:25 pm

My dad decided to go last night. I thought I would jump on here and try and find some helpful advice. Telling me to tell him to do it himself isn't really helpful. He can and will look into it himself, but in the interim I was trying to feel it out, since I DO have the time. He doesn't drink margaritas, go cycling and cook lavish meals on a daily basis, and the comparison of his interests with his available time- time that could be spent on here forming relationships with friendly eplaya members- is pretty rich coming from people who don't seem to have a problem finding time to comment repeatedly on bacon.

Having looked pretty thoroughly and seen that most every eplaya topic is dominated by the same, small group of people who have thousands and thousands of posts each, it doesn't seem like a place to get well-rounded advice. It's the typical veteran burner heirarchy bullshit associated with every forum on the web. Burning man is changing, it has changed and it will continue to evolve, deal with it- and if you don't like it, rather than being bitter know-it-alls on a silly internet forum, perhaps you should organize a new event elsewhere. Eplaya may not be THE playa, but if you need and use your anonymity to express this side of yourselves then I just hope I don't see you on the playa. Say what you will, get your last comments in but I won't be back to try and gather anything useful. It has fuck all to do with tough skin, and more to do with the fact that it shouldn't have to. This message isn't for everyone, you know who you are.

skygod · Post by **skygod** » Fri May 09, 2008 3:54 pm

You're welcome.

Post by **AntiM** » Fri May 09, 2008 4:06 pm

Leave the bacon out of it.

You asked for advice, you got it. You didn't like it. It was nicely and eloquently rephrased. You didn't like the advice. I am sorry, but we have to use the search engine the very same way as you. Every year someone asks to find "xyz" for them. Sometimes that is possible, especially if it concerns concrete things such as tents or nose-flutes. Someone asks "will this work"? They'll get sound advice. Some might ask, what is such and such camp like and who would I ask about it? We'll point them in the right direction. Some people come here one evening a week and read up on what might be going on and ask specific questions. We respond. Asking to find a nice camp for your dad without doing any damn footwork yourself? Oh, we'll respond. Many of the answers were polite and sound advice. You threw what amounts to a tantrum.

I'm not anonymous. I'm identifiable and approachable. Yes, I am here a lot. There's reasons for that, just ask why. You're making some ugly assumptions. It may well say more about yourself than any eplaya poster.

phil · Post by **phil** » Fri May 09, 2008 4:07 pm

> comment repeatedly on bacon.

MMMMMMMM. Bacon!

phil · Post by **phil** » Fri May 09, 2008 4:14 pm

> Having looked pretty thoroughly and seen that most every eplaya
> topic is dominated by the same, small group of people who have
> thousands and thousands of posts each, it doesn't seem like a
> place to get well-rounded advice

Y'know, I do have a concern about that.

Post by **AntiM** » Fri May 09, 2008 4:19 pm

Eplaya has never been well-rounded compared to the main event.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Fri May 09, 2008 5:12 pm

I'm getting a picture of her dad as some high-priced, high-octane corporate/lawyer type who expects everything handed to him on a platter, like it's some sort of club med. He can't spend a half hour a week to put his vacation together in a way that pleases him? Where's the fucking eplaya consierge?

Token · Post by **Token** » Fri May 09, 2008 5:14 pm

Camp Logan's Run is perfect for all those unwanted old farts.

Give me your tired, your poor,Your huddled masses,
The wretched refuse, the homeless, tempest-tossed...

Bring em down, we will put a neat crystal in their palm and make it turn red sometimes mid week. You can take their "ashes" to the temple, or for a small fee we can take care of the "matter".

All food-stuff byproducts are used exclusively by Burners Without Borders to feed the needy in disaster stricken regions.

Camp Logan's Run,

Forever Young.

thirt33n · Post by **thirt33n** » Fri May 09, 2008 7:21 pm

Nice try all y'all. Some just can't grasp simple direct answers.

I think I would have just asked JennyMarie a few things.
I hope she's here to read my questions.

Has your Dad read the Survival Guide? Has your Dad read the First Timers Guide? Is your Dad fully aware of what it takes to go out to the desert and live for a week and leave no trace?

and finally, How many days does your Dad plan on attending?

It makes me feel bad when someone full of excitement and energy comes onto eplaya and in an unprepared haste asks any easily answered question and misinterprates (or however you spell it) the answers that are sometimes snarkily given. They almost always take offense and come back with carefully planned attacks and then say that they will not be back.

I'm sorry JennyMarie, that you didn't get to understand these people who are very helpful loving and funny and actually in my opinion a good representation of the real playa.

I'm sure if you run into any of them in BRC the typing won't get in the way.

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Fri May 09, 2008 7:52 pm

We should keep in mind that this is an international forum and most humour will not translate to people from other places, especially when they are new to the board.

I do think it's a shame we don't have a bigger cross section of the playa on here.

Digital-Dragonfly · Post by **Digital-Dragonfly** » Fri May 09, 2008 9:08 pm

theCryptofishist wrote:I'm getting a picture of her dad as some high-priced, high-octane corporate/lawyer type who expects everything handed to him on a platter, like it's some sort of club med. He can't spend a half hour a week to put his vacation together in a way that pleases him? Where's the fucking eplaya consierge?

WOW - I am amazed how much you can "channel" from her description of her father. AMAZING - Do you have a 1-800 - psychic #?
I have some questions about a horse in the third race.

thisisthatwhichis · Post by **thisisthatwhichis** » Fri May 09, 2008 9:11 pm

Jenny, bring your Dad with you..... In your fold, camp, wonderment... and help him enjoy it with "no expectations".....

I did with mine, and we have the greatest Bond, because of it.

Yes, a lot of us have many posts and spend some time here.... so sometimes we snark....... We should try to learn not to, so much, but you wouldn't know how many think this is a "Default-World" event......

Part of the experience, for me, was how I can live my life gifting others... with myself....... It's something you and your Father can (re)-learn together..............

oneeyeddick · Post by **oneeyeddick** » Fri May 09, 2008 9:23 pm

Word !!!!

...............and Bacon

I need help! I want to find a nice camp for my dad!

I need help! I want to find a nice camp for my dad!

Here is the Camp!!!